Bwa ha ha.. the erm.. it was great :)
So I'm thinking that.. instead of a boy named Jacob, maybe a girl named Jannette? I DON'T KNOW! It would be hilarious, really... If you don't mind the whole "gayness" of it..
Orrrrr you could just name him Jack White? Since that would be the exact opposite of Jacob?
Shit.. what was his last name?! Black??