Review for JEDI POTTER


(#) Cateagle 2010-07-21

-laughs uproariously- I did rather love how Amelia survived the asassination attempt and Lucius' thought was quite amusing. I have to presume that Lucius did not have a good day upon his return; Tom really should develop better 'people skills'.

Dumbledore had a brute force approach in mind (or, considering the source, is that "brute farce"?) but there's the question of how he would have attempted to administer the potion since he has no direct contact with Harry nor, I suspect, would Harry be unable to detect such a threat via the Force. Albus' rationalizing this step was certainly ample illustration of his slipping grip on reality, let alone control. I do have to wonder, though, if Severus wasn't affected by sliding off his desk and onto the vials, both the broken one and any whole ones his sudden fall might then break. Too, I had to laugh at the surprise prepared for Albus, but I'm curious if he was propelled back out of his fireplace or shot out of Severus' fireplace; not that the immediate consequences matter.

The training seems to be going well adn at least no one is of a mind to drop out (we might even see Ron maturing through all this). I daresay that no matter what they do post-bellum, this group is going to accomplish things that'll shake up the wizarding world as they'll have learned several lasting lessons from all this training (this is, in addition to using a lightsaber) that'll apply to anything.

I enjoyed the honest way Harry dealt with the dementors and then dealt properly with Stan's body as well as hid exactly what he did do on Azkaban. I reckon there're going to be some very surprised folk (I can just imagine Tom's 'equanimity" when the disappearance of the dementors is made known to him).

That's it for a first read-through. I'll post more, later, if subsequent reads suggest further commentary.

Author's response

Heya Cat!

Glad you liked the slapstick. Nope, Tommy will not be happy.

People skills? Crucio! What are 'people skills?

Dumbley: Given all the blows his ego has taken in the past couple months, his judgment is...wavering, at best. He's becoming more unstable as time passes, and more prone to actions he never would have considered before.

As for delivering the potions, he was planning to use Fawkes to kidnap Harry, stun him and force the potions down his throat, but he doesn't know Fawkes and the Sorting hat have defected to the other side.

Severus: Actually, I was in the middle of posting when I realized I'd left that particular plothole unfilled. He never came in to 'intimate contact' with them. The potions fell on the side facing the fireplace, but he he was already 'in flight', as it were. He hit the desk a second later, slid across the desk top and into the wall on the other side.

I need him alive for a while longer.

Dumbley II: He was flung backwards across his own office and into the stone pillar by the door.

Training: While their muscles ache, they all have some nifty new toys to play with, and the Harry/Mackenzie demonstration gave them a definite target to shoot for.

After all, -every- kid likes to play sword-fighter!

Ron: Is indeed maturing a bit. That's all I can say for now, as I have some unpleasantries in store for him.

The Jedi: Will indeed be forces for change. The stagnation of the WW is unacceptable. While they will not -force- change,they will provide a clear example of the benefits of said change. Amelia will be solidly on their side, and as she's already begun to affect things, she is a poster girl for that kind of change. The purebloods will despise it, of course, but then the purebloods will be having a hard time finding cousins to marry.

Dementors: With their effect on people, their presence in the WW makes no sense. They can only be explained in two ways. the forst is that they care some form of minor demon, that the ministry can't get rid of, or they came with the island.

With Azkaban no longer needed...for the time being, they have no valid purpose. With no prisoners, to feed from, logic indicates that sooner or later they'd get hungry enough to go hunting.

Stan: Even in canon, Stan didn't deserve what happened. He was said to have been showing a dark mark, so Scumgouger chucked him into Azkaban, but never bothered the people working in the ministry who had the same tattoo?

Further, given that he was effectively dead already and his body was condemned by the keeper's lack of 'give a shit', to starve to death within a few more weeks, Harry did the only humane thing he could.

I pictured Harry as following the guidance of the force and based on the Star Wars series, I think the force would have seen Stan's 'pseudo-existence' as anathema to nature.

Tom: Is gonna have a melt-down!

Thanks for your input. Always welcome.