This is without doubt one of the most exciting stories I have ever had the pleasure to read. It is well-written, chock full of wonderful ideas, the grammar and syntax pass muster and the hero beats the villain(s). I have had no doubt in adding it to my list of my all-time favourite stories.
Have you considered posting to ff.net, as I am sure that you would receive many more wonderful reviews. Believe me this is a very good story and at least IMHO better than many.
Tibi grates ago fabellae, ave atque vale. Cliviussum
Author's response
Wow! That's one of the nicest reviews I've ever gotten. I am still pondering the ups and downs of posting on FF.n.
Alorkin