This chapter was great. I think the fact that you took the criticism and actually pointed it out and fixed it in your authors note and then the start of the chapter was great. Not enough Authors are able to do that.
The idea of Hermione's lightsaber being sapphire and the hilt based of of Harry's was great. I also like Neville's it is fitting.
Tanking Sybil was something i thought was going to happen no matter the situation. She was far to big a risk and it is a fitting action to take.
My favorite aspect of this story is the way you have harry as an analytical and logic based person. He is taking the actions that are needed. It all falls back to doing what is Right and what is Easy. The difference can be subtle but it is there. The fact that he is making the hard choices when needed is great, you can always look back and analyze what you did at a later point.
I look forward to the next chapter.
Cel
Author's response
Thank you, Celexes. When someone brings up a problem like that, I do try to fix it.
Hermione's Blade. I usually use Sapphire for Hermione, first given that it's her birthstone and second, because I think Sapphires are one of the two loveliest gemstones in nature. The reason I use emerald for Harry is two-fold. First, it's an instant identifier (his eyes), and second, His birthstone is ruby and that wouldn't be good.
Sybill: Basically, yeah. She'd keep on trying to escape until he made it or hurt herself. The risks of having an informant in your unit far outweighs the violation of her rights by securing her.
Thank you for that. Harry is still very much his canon personality but like you said, he's doing the right thing, where Dumbledore prattles on and on about redemption, and he's thinking things through first...mostly. He makes mistakes from time to time. Still, he has the finest mind of their age a trained Auror and two well trained combat veterans beside him, and has taken the precautions of hiring competent people to advise and assist him. That's something most authors don't do. In most fanon, (and in canon as well) he relies entirely too much on luck, and that's a bad habit to get into.
Having been a soldier, both as a SEAL and with the Marine Corps, I'm more than familiar with what can go wrong when the boss decides to rely on chance, so I'm writing this like an organized strike. Train yourself and your troops to the best of your ability, prepare, ensure your logistics are in order, deal with unexpected occurrences as best you can, train some more, and then, when the time is right, strike and strike hard. Since Harry is fighting a two-front war,(never a good idea) he is exceptionally busy.
I will post as soon as I can.
Until then, thank you.
Alorkin