(#) Jeram 2011-01-30
Well, it's not bad, but I wish you hadn't gone straight to so many cliches early on... you know, Harry Evans, astounding the Goblins with politeness, ridiculous shopping trip, insidious Dumbledore. I'd rather see something new, and so far the Hogwarts part itself is the best bit - the first part of the story was like many stories I've read before.