(#) BenRG 2006-09-27
Okay - positives first. I like the idea of the RPG vision of magic being applicable in Harry's magical world, giving him a completely unique perspective on the art. That is one reason why I like the original 'ArchMagus' on FF.net.
The negatives... Are a few too many for me. A 11-year-old with guns? Oh dear. Not enough discussion of magic and how Harry learns to use it. Paper thin characterisation and an OC who really fails to have any useful function at all. And that nickname... Ugh.
This is a valiant attempt on your part, but I prefer the original. Please keep going, as it may yet find its feet but try not to make Harry a gun-weilding assassin too early.
BenRG's Rating: 5/10