yesh this is getting very hard to read!!! lol i cried so hard when i read this.. i feel like a loser but i guess thats good that your writing can do that and it is embaressing to cry infront of people i feel like at my grandpas funral u refused to cry and his side of his family (he is my moms step dad) thought i ws heartless i just wantd to go up to them and me like "i can garentee you that i will not stop cring for weeks but no one will see it" i feel so weak when i cry i dislike it...