Very good. It was a really interesting and captivating read, all of the metaphors keeping me enchanted with it's charm. You use metaphors very well; they always make your point have a greater impact, whereas with a lot of people they can be confusing. I can really see this as a song and it echoed MCR in a way that I'm certain would make them proud.
My favourite part was;
"I see your carnival mask eyes."
It just really appealed to me, like everyone is hiding their true selves with something that is meant to be more interesting and beautiful.
Great job, I loved it! :D
Author's response
Wow, thank you so much! I'm so glad you liked it, and thanks for taking the time to leave such a nice and detailed review...It means a lot :)