I'll say this just once, just because someone hasn't written a story, it doesn't mean their opinion doesn't count.
I love listening to music, but my singing sucks, so I don't sing in public. I love reading but m writing doesn't flow, so I don't inflict on the public.
So, Maxtaf and weigancw, seriously, get over yourselves. This guy is using a disease as a crutch.
And objectively speaking from a technical stand point, this story isn't worth the webpage it's written on. From a personal standpoint, it isn't orth the time it took me to read the first sentence.
Get a beta...or better yet, don't post here.