Review for The Start of Something New

The Start of Something New

(#) aredphxbird2 2012-11-10

Good sequel so far.The only prblem I have is that those huge blocked paragraphs need to be broken down for better readablity.

Author's response

Thanks for the review, I went back to the site and read how the story read, from a reader's point of view. The paragraphs are of a fairly normal length, however the site did not show much of a 'space' between paragraphs, I have edited and added an extra return between paragraphs, and read the story onsite myself, it seems ok to me know. I will remember to do this in future with the posts I make.
I Hope this helps and will not in any way put you further enjoying the story.