Review for The Heir

The Heir

(#) smeagol 2014-08-26

I just read the four chapters. Looks good so far with a qualification. Be a bit more careful now with your developing relationships with the new Harry with other people. Your descriptions of the new relationships with Remus and the goblins made sense because of the fast paced context that required it. You have established the New Harry as the Man of Action. Now it would be prudent to show more of his maturity and wisdom that he has acquired. Yes, you have started that already with your descriptive perceptions by Susan Bones. Stay Calm and Carry On...