Very well-written, with a slow and dramatic feel to it. It's tantalising without being tense, and gives a great deal to ponder over considering the chapter's length. My sole quibble is that you had a typo toward the end (Fat Lad in place of Fat Lady), but that's nothing, really. I enjoyed this fic and would like to see what you can do with it.
Author's response
Thank you for commenting, and for pointing out the little spelling error; I'm afraid my brain kept supplying a "y" where there was none. I have already written this fic in its entirety--it's just a matter of when I get the next part up.