FicWad

Hello there! New fresh fic based on real events (critics to Gerard and Lyn-Z). I put myself in their shoes for a minute and came up with this story. Hope you like it!
Lulu

warning: language!


Try

Gerard entered his apartment and closed the door behind him, trying to leave the world outside. It was 6pm. He thought he would see Lindsay's smile and automatically forget all his frustration, but the scene at home wasn't the one he was expecting.
He followed the sound of sobs and found his wife sitting at the end of the bed, with her face on her hands and crying her heart out. Feeling worried, confused and afraid at the same time, he inmediately went closer and sat next to her, caressing her shoulder to comfort her as he tried to spy through her fingers to find her concerned face. He softly asked her what was wrong, and all she could answer was a simple 'Everything's fucked up'. She took her hands off her face and he wiped the tears and black make up running down her cheeks.

All I know
Is everything is not as it's sold
but the more I grow the less I know

"I know" he sighed in agreement. "Everything's fucked up"
They stayed in silence for a minute before she spoke again.
"I knew it would be like this, but I thought I was more prepared to face it. Now I see I'm fuckin not prepared at all" she shook her head, feeling totally frustrated.
"Don't say that, you're doing the best you can"
"But it isn't enough, it's never enough! Everything I do or say is wrong or missunderstood"
"Tell me!" he sighed. "Aparently, I'm not the same good guy I used to be and I've turned into a fuckin asshole"

And I have lived so many lives
Though I'm not old
And the more I see, the less I grow
The fewer the seeds the more I sow

"Because of me" she followed his sigh. "I've turned you into an asshole"
"You've only turned me into the happiest man alive. The problem here is that me being happy makes a lot of people unhappy" he rolled his eyes.
"Yeah...And me being happy with you makes a lot of people want to kill me. It's like so fuckin unfair...and scary"
"And sad"
They fell on their backs on the bed and stared at the ceiling in silence.

Then I see you standing there
Wanting more from me
And all I can do is try

"Everybody missunderstood what I said about hating to be called Mrs. Gerard Way" she spoke again. "They think that I don't want to be related to you, like I don't love you enough"
"People is so damn weird" Gerard chuckled. "First they thought you were with me for the fame, and now that you don't want anything to do with my fame they think you don't love me. It was the same bullshit with Mikey and Alicia. A lot of girls hated her cause she was posting pictures with Mikey on her myspace. It's always like a fuckin circus. When I didn't talk about my private life they wanted to know everything. Now that they know everything they don't want me to talk anymore!" he laughed at the irony of the situation. "I don't get it. I mean, we're normal people. When normal people is in love they want to share it, not hide it. I know we're kind of...too fluffy" he laughed again, followed by Lindsay's giggle "...with the messages and the unicorns...But I can't help it! I love you, I don't want to lie to everybody pretending that I don't"

I wish I hadn't seen all of the realness
And all the real people are really not real at all

"I love you too, but I don't want to use you" Lindsay replied. "All those fans in our show the other day...MCR's fans...they didn't even know our songs, honey, I swear...It was horrible" she shook her head. "And the guys were totally pissed off, Jimmy looked like he was going to fuckin kill someone any moment. And our own fans, the real ones, were very annoyed too. You know I don't have a problem with your fans Gee, but music is music and I just can't stand it when they come to our show just to see you backstage or to talk to me so then they can say to their friends that they met Gerard Way's wife. It took me so long to have some respect for my work and now...noone cares about it. I'm not a bassist, I'm not a performer, I'm not an artist, I'm not an inspiration to anyone...I'm just someone with no talent or personality who married you. That's what I hate, that the only good thing I have to offer to the world is my marriage certificate".
She let a deep sigh escape her lungs.

The more I learn, the more I learn
The more I cry, the more I cry
As I say goodbye to the way of life
I thought I had designed for me

"I'm sorry Lin" he said sadly.
"Hey, don't say that Gee, it's not like you do it on purpose. It isn't your fault that so many girls love you" she giggled. "But I really need you to know that I love you Gerard" she turned to look into his eyes, speaking softly. "I don't care if everybody else think I'm faking it, but I need you to know that I do truely love you with all I am"
He stared into her bright hazel eyes and smiled warmly.
"I know you do sweetheart" he answered, playing with her hair. "And you know I love you too" he whispered.

Then I see you standing there
Wanting more from me
And all I can do is try

"Do you think I've changed, sugar?" Gerard asked, remembering his own problem.
"Of course you've changed" his wife smiled. "Everybody changes"
"But...do you think I've changed for worse?"
"No, I don't think so. You're just...older, baby. Like more mature, a little more serious. And it's natural that your younger fans can't understand it, cause they aren't going through the same. Besides, the married life...well that changes anybody, right? Maybe they feel you don't pay them as much attention as you used to"
"But I still care about the fans a lot, why can't they see it?"
"Cause you're farther away now, Gee"
"But I never meant to be farther from them. If we weren't as famous as we are now I would be as close to them as I used to, as you are with your fans"
"But you do are very famous now Gee, that's a fact. Didn't you always want to make like a change in the world? Now you can do it, babe"
"I know, but...It's...really scary. There is all this people out there listening to what I say, watching what I do, following my steps...and I am not a God. I don't want to disappoint anybody. I just don't know how to do this, Lin, I do my best but I can't be perfect. I wasn't lying with the 'I'm just a man, I'm not a hero' thing. I really am just a man. Just a fucked up ordinary man. The only difference is that in high school I was disgusting and annoying and now suddenly I'm loved and I don't know why"
"Because you're special, Gee. Maybe this isn't what you want to hear, my love, but you aren't that ordinary. Maybe you are fucked up..." she laughed, and he laughed with her. "...but there is something very special about you" Lindsay said, love written on her face.
"But I'm so afraid, honey. Look at the girl who commited suicide. What if it's really our fault?"
"Gerard, you know it isn't your fault, you guys have always encouraged people to overcome their problems and keep on living. That girl surely had a lot of problems herself and sadly she didn't get the message of the band and she couldn't be helped in time. It's terrible but you can't blame yourself for it, Gerard. My Chemical Romance has saved the lives of a lot of people"
"That's what scares me the most, Lin. I couldn't feel happier for helping all those persons but at the same time I think of how many lives depend on us, on what we do and say. It's a huge responsability and it scares the shit out of me, honey. That's why I'm not that much in contact with the fans anymore. they are so many and we are just five. And I fear that if I am to close to them I will mean even more to them. And I need to make my own mistakes without ruining other people's life" he concluded. "They need so much more than what I can give them"

Then I see you standing there
I'm all I'll ever be
But all I can do is try
Try

"You are trying, Gee. And that's what matters. We are doing the best we can, even if it isn't enough" Lindsay said.
"You sound so different now than when I came home half an hour ago" he giggled as he brought her closer. She cuddled to him smiling.
"I know. I was like too upset when you came. I'm sorry i brought all this shit home, I didn't mean to worry you"
"Hey, come on sugar! We are a couple and your problems are our problems. It can't be only happy times, right?"
"I'm afraid so" she sighed.

All of the moments that already passed
We'll try to go back and make them last

"Do I make you happy, Gee?" she asked him hopefuly.
"Of course you do, my love. You're the best ever happened in my life" he assured. "And you? Are you happy with me? In spite of all the talking around us"
She gave him one of her sincere huge smiles and nodded.
"You know, the circus around us may be hell. But being with you is like heaven. And I wouldn't change it for anything in the world" she hugged him tightly, which resulted in a big smile on Gerard's face. "I will never be perfect, but I promise you I will try my best to be the wife you deserve, honey"
"You're already much more than I deserve, Lin. But I also promise you I will be the best husband I can be" he assured, kissing her forehead.

All of the things we want each other to be
We never will be, we never will be
And that's wonderful, and that's life

They stared into each others eyes, smiling. And they both felt that, no matter how much people talked, they had something much stronger than words and rumours. They had real love.

And that's you, baby
This is me, baby
And we are, we are
We are, we are
Free
In our love

He lent over her face and captured her lips softly.
"I love you" he said softly in a kiss. She smiled against his lips and repeated the magic words which heal any wound.
"I love you too. Forever."
"And ever" he replied.
As sadness faded away, they drowned in their own little world, where they could run away together. Anytime they wanted.

We are free in our love
Try...

The End.