FicWad

Three days passed without real event. My hallway companion came to visit me a few times. Mr. Josef von Clausewitz, the Honorable Josef von Clausewitz, proved himself to be a regular pest, however attractive.
In my difficult time of translating the elaborate and barely legible script of the barrowed manuscript, I caught traces of a story that, when I could read it, seemed rather interesting and one I had yet to read. It was on just such an occasion that I was come upon by this man.
Sitting in the window, reeking of three days without a bath, and arched over the difficult to read text, I felt a slight shift in the air around me. The shift could have been a smell- which could in itself be tangible to other senses- or perhaps just a disturbance in the air current.
A rose, deep maroon, and barely budding suddenly sprouted out of my book. I look up to see the man, the "acquaintance," leaning casually against my bed and studying the carvings of my chamber.
"You left me without a chance for a rebuttal last time, and merely having to pave the way for you, I did not have a chance to concoct some response to equal your wit. Perhaps I may do so now, let me further our acquaintance, if I may..."
He trailed off as he brushed a stray hair from his face. The action made me swallow. He seemed to want me to respond but at the moment, I was completely lost.
"Very well then," he pushed himself off of the bed corner and began to move, I wouldn't exactly call it pacing, more casually meandering, "I am Josef von Clausewitz."
I blinked. I don't think it was the response that he was looking for, but he continued none the less.
"To give you an idea of who exactly you are talking to, should the current Prince Wilhelm die," he looked directly at me as he spoke, a spark of triumph igniting in his small eyes. He leaned forward, "I shall be next in line for the throne."
I muttered a sort of "Ah," and nodded, wondering why he was telling me this and why now just as I had been getting the hang of the writing.
He brought his finger tips together, much the same way my old boss had done-only on him it held much more appeal, making an attempt at laughter, "My dear, I don't think you quite grasp who you are currently conversing with-"
I nodded, "I understand it, sir, that if the current heir to the throne dies before you, a circumstance I wouldn't bet on knowing the hygiene of this environment, you may become king- "
"King," he repeated, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath.
"But I don't know why you should want to be king. That's a lot of problems to work through, carry the weight of, when would you actually live?"
"Live, to live is to achieve and what can be a greater achievement than power? Undisputable power?" His voice had taken on a strange tone, suddenly the tone died and his voice went very soft, "but I digress. Allow me to lay out a plan for our future."
I raised an eyebrow. He didn't notice but turned away, bringing his index fingers to his lips he took a deep breath.
"Your employer, your lord, when will he arrive?"
"I-I hardly know, the snow, you see-"
"Ah, yes, I see," he turned so I could see only a small portion of his face, "Well, that will give us time a plenty, for now, my dear, I will simply state that I always get what I want, and I now know what I want."
He ran a warm dry hand over my cheekbone, tracing the muscle down the side of my face and let his fingers trace my jaw. I shivered.
He visited me twice more, never shedding any light on what he called "our future" but referring to the subject often. I began to be very curious, but my curiosity had to be squashed for the time being.
Lillian erupted into the room just as Josef von Clausewitz was finishing up a humorous story of one adventure or another, reminding me about the infamous future.
She was grinning from ear to ear, then she saw him and made a deep bow, "forgive me sir," she said, suddenly serious, "I did not know that you were here, other wise I would not have dreamed-"
"It's alright, Lillian," I said smiling, " M. Josef was just leaving."
He looked wryly at me as if it was the last thing he had thought I would say but not wholly surprising, "Indeed I was," He turned to me and bowing low over my hand, "until later then."
I blushed.
Lillian watched him go out with badly hidden disapproval, before she turned to me, "Ah me, what was he doing in here? He shouldn't be going around flirting like that with women below his status, not that you're below his status necessarily but you being a page and him an honorable cousin of the prince, its just not decent."
"Lillian," I smiled, in too good a mood to really be paying attention to what she was saying, "You came in here so happy, what happened to change that? You must have something to tell me."
She brightened up at once, "Yes, yes I do! Your dress is done, and what a dress! Maroon and gold as true as could be. You'll be such a sight! Yes, I do believe that Ananias himself will have to approve when you put it on. And we shall tie up your hair and give you such jewelry as the Prince has afforded you! Ah me, how beautiful you shall be."
I couldn't help but be a little excited. Lillian was bubbling to much for me not to be. "Well, where is it?"
"Otto has it just outside the door, oh! dear me, I had forgotten about Otto. Come in dear!"
The little hunchback held the dress in his arms and behind him a little servant boy pulled a small trunk. Lillian took a deep sigh of admiration as she pulled the gown from Otto's arms. The whole dress had been sowed of deep maroon fabric with a deeply plunging square neck framed in with two pieces of coppery satin. Not quite gold the dress had more coppery tones in it. The sleeves split at the shoulder with long white satin sleeves inside them. Copper bands made little puffs down to the elbow before the sleeve became like a regular long sleeve. A small narrow vest-like- jacket of coppery shere hung down the length of the dress.
Lillian was ecstatic and shooed the man and his helper out of the room.
I looked doubtfully at the neckline, "isn't it a bit low?"
Lillian smiled, "What a strange creature you are, not to know a dress! Silly child-" she opened the trunk and pulled out what seemed to be a satin nightgown. It felt strange but it was nice to have an extra hand in getting the dress on.
It was beautiful, but it fit me strangely, hanging more like a nightgown than an dress, though it had been made narrow enough to fit alright. Lillian laced up the back and I looked at my reflection. It was a flattering color scheme.
"Does it look strange to you?" I asked cocking my head.
"Well, its not all on yet!" she pulled a belt about three inches wide from the trunk.
I smiled and began to buckle it around my waist. She giggled, I looked up, so my extensive studies of the era had not included fashion, so what? She took the belt from my hands and put it very high pulling it tight enough to press on my ribcage. I looked at the effect in the mirror, the dress was suddenly the perfect size.
"Wow," I managed to say before Lillian thrust me into the door way of the "bathroom."
I sat down gingerly before the mirror, afraid of wrinkling the dress. Lillian pulled the pencils out of my hair that had been holding them in place for about a week now, and threw them aside in disgust. She brushed my hair out and began the long process of taming my wild locks. I think I must have fallen asleep after about an hour of her working, but she woke me up again very soon, or so it seemed to me.
I looked at my reflection. My hair had been put into two large loops, gracefully cradled in copper netting sewn with pearls. A grey plate, not unlike the ones I had seen some of the other women wearing seemed to hold the net in place.
"Ah me," Lillian whispered as she looked at my reflection, "such beauty was never better graced. But now for the necklace!"
I stood and followed her into the bed room where she was digging once more in the trunk.
"Hmm, that's an interesting change."
We both turned.
The clown was leaning against the door frame, his arms folded across his chest.
Lillian, for the first time in probably her entire life was speechless. Choosing to ignore him, or making the pretense of it, she came to me and tied a maroon strip of fabric round my neck.
Ananias walked proudly into the room, and clasping his hands behind his back commenced a thorough inspection of me.
"The sleeves look like cannons," he commented, "and the color is completely wrong."
"Ananias," Lillian said almost as a question.
"She looks out of place," he circled me again.
"She looks beautiful and you know it!" Lillian reprimanded.
"Beautiful...now that is a matter of taste, and she is certainly-"
"If I may-" I began.
"The waist isn't at all flattering, not that a figure like that could ever really be flattered." I didn't know if he meant that as an insult or as a compliment, but knowing him as much as I did, I figured it was the former, turns out I was right, "she's too skinny, it just makes the fact more pronounced. And the dress makes her height all the more noticeable."
Lillian was starting to look hurt ,"Ananias that's cruel!"
He looked at her and smiled as if he felt remorse," I'm sorry, tell me what you would have me say and I will say it, with pleasure."
"Then say she looks beautiful."
"She looks beautiful." He repeated obediently.
"I will not be talked about as if I am not present!"
He raised an eyebrow and looked me fully in the face for the first time. "And what will you have me say?" He said it in such a fashion that if I had given him something he would have done the opposite.
I tried to choose my words carefully, "I would not have you say anything but the truth..." I looked directly at his eyes and made a sudden realization, "but you haven't said anything that was the truth about my dress."
His mouth shut quickly and he looked out the window.
"Ah, Milady Elene," all three of the people turned and there was Prince Fredrick. Lillian and Ananias bowed, as it were instinctively, I took the hint from them and tried my best to make a dignified curtsy. Prince Fredrick came up to me, "You may stand," he said in a condescending manner.
He looked me over and I tensed under his gaze, "You look beautiful."
I stole a look at Ananias, but he didn't move at all. His face, like Lillian's, was toward the floor.
"Leave us," the Prince commanded, both obediently departed without any argument.
I feared being alone in the same room with the man, and I didn't know what to say. I was saved the trouble.
"I have longed for the chance to introduce you properly to the court," he began, running a hand through his thinning hair.
The action was somehow disarming and I let myself relax a little bit.
"Would I held the charm of my cousin," he seemed to be speaking more to himself than to me, "but my dear, you are of a nature more forgiving I think." He had taken my hand as he spoke, and I almost jumped back at his sudden groping gesture.
"I-I-" I stuttered, afraid of offending him by suddenly jerking my hand out of his warm grasp.
"I know that you do not know what to say," its true, I didn't, "but, never fear, for I shall be with you through out the course of ev'n."
"No, that's fine, I mean-"
"I intend to have you by my side," he pulled on my hand and I backed up, my stomach rolling inside me.
"No really," I was becoming thoroughly freaked out, "I'll be fine..."
"Your secret, yes, don't worry, your secret is safe with me," he pulled again, and it was all I could do to keep my ground, what was he talking about? What secret? "You look surprised, yes, my darling, most lovely Elene! I have found your secret, but never fret, I shall let not a word escape my lips."
I managed to pulled my hand from his grasp ever so carefully, but he didn't seem to notice the loss, "My dear, " he went to the window, "You are more beautiful than any woman I have yet beheld," he wasn't looking at me, he was staring at the snow outside, "I- ," he turned around, "I must have you, I...must, Will you be mine? Will you, my Lady?"
I opened my mouth and shut it like a grounded fish, "Your highness, I-"
He crossed the room in two large strides, "No, for you I shall be Fredrick, please call me Fredrick." He reached for my hand again, but I managed to dodge his groping hands.
"You are to forward, sir," I pressed my hand against his chest, trying to push him away, instead he took my hand in both of his and pressed it to his heart, "I have had so little conversation with you, please...I-I beg you, leave me be." I tried in vain to pull my hand from his, but he held it all the more securely.
"Oh, my darling!"
I yanked my hand from his grasp and took a few hasty steps away, "Sir!" I yelled, or rather screamed would be a more adequate description, "please! Leave me in peace!"
He stood there as if he had just been slapped. "You- you do not wish my attentions?"
I took a deep breath to collect myself and tried to speak as calmly as possible, "Your manners are too previous."
He looked around as if he didn't know where he was, before bowing to me and departing.
I looked at my hand. It was red and shaking, suddenly cold. I put it to my forehead and felt the heat there. I went to the window and looked out at the snow. The moon had just risen and night was gathering closely around the trees. It was a beautiful sight.
"I want to go home," I said to the moon,
All at once I started to cry. I felt homesickness as I have never felt it before. I missed all the quirky annoying habits of my friends and the sometimes annoying habits of my brother. I suddenly missed my parents.
I pushed open the window, "I want to go home," I said louder, in English.
I wiped at the tears, but it seemed to only make them come harder.
Finally, I turned away, and looked at the room, "This is home," I reminded myself, "This is your home now. E'"
"What do you mean? I have never heard this now-ee."
I shot a glare at the door. The clown was standing with one shoulder leaning against the door frame. Though his question had not been unkind, the tone and the timing was not as it could have been.
"What do you want?" I snapped at him, rubbing fiercely at my cheeks to get the tear stains away.
"All this time, and you still hate me." He walked into the room. His costume had changed. It was black and gold. One of his sleeves and one of his pant legs was green. Over the green knee an interesting pattern, like gold paint allowed to drip up and down his leg. It made me think of some sort of mystery, I looked away from him.
"You've been crying," he spoke it as though he was accusing me of a crime, a crime he found ever so funny,
"Brilliant observation, Socrates," I muttered, if there was nothing I hated more it was to be caught crying. My eyes have a tendency of swelling up along with my nose, and both turn red.
"It makes you uncomely," he observed carelessly before going to the window and closing it. Before I could argue, he said, "as will the cold air of a German winter night."
"Must you always leave me speechless?" I dropped my hands hopelessly to my sides.
"If I did not leave you speechless, then you would quite leave me speechless, is that not true?" He began to play with the curtain that hung by my bed.
I blinked, "did- did you just compliment me?" call me stupid, but I never was good at picking up on things like that.
He glanced at me, a wry smile on his lips as if that's what he had wanted me to think. I growled, "You are so blasted.... so blasted- GAH!!!"
He laughed, "A clown is meant to be, as you say it 'gah.' If my interpretation is accurate."
I sank down helplessly in my chair, letting my head fall to my hands, "Why do you bother me so much?"
"Because you are so reactive, now if you'll excuse me, I have to go entertain." He made a deep, sarcastic bow, and disappeared through the door.
*
I stayed like that for a long time before I realized the favor he had just done for me. My homesickness had completely disappeared, not that he could have really known it was homesickness that I suffered from. But by distracting me- no matter how frustrating the distraction- I felt exceedingly better.
I sighed, I should thank him. It was the noble thing to do, but I couldn't...I just couldn't. What was it he had called me? Reactive, whatever that meant.
I was beginning to feel tired, so I decided to decipher a page of words before putting in for the night. I unfastened the belt, plucked at the back of the dress till I caught something that was something enough to pull it loose and pulled the dress over my head. The hair was a trick but in the end I prevailed. The gold satin nightgown for the under layer of the dress, that I decided would have to serve as a nightgown until something better was found.
I brushed out my hair as well as I could with my fingers and tried to focus on the page before me. There wasn't enough light so I gave up and turned in.
It was maybe an hour or so later that I sat bolt up right in bed. I imagine my eyes were wide with discovery but any discovery there flared into frustration which then melted into ingenious. I tried to smile wryly - for the dramatic effect for which I was just in the mood - my stomach a flurry with butterflies from the excitement.
The plan was perfect, it was just the sort of thing my mother -wonderful person that she was - would have told me to do. Hey in the fifteenth century, there were no psychiatrists, one had to depend on the advice of one's mother. The victim or rather the recipient of my little scheme? The clown.
I must say I had a difficult time falling asleep that night.
*
Morning came to show that large flakes of snow were falling, the sky was cloudy and gray, and the fog was so thick I could only barely make out the top edge of the castle wall.
I smiled, and took a deep breath. Today, today was the day that my plan would go into action.
I had been given no additional attire so I looked at the dress that lay carefully lain over the end of my bed. I looked at the nightgown, shrugged and grabbed the belt. I didn't fell like going through all the delicacies of that dress if I didn't need to, I headed out the door...
...and ran into the Honorable Josef von Clausewitz.
I hadn't been looking where I was going absorbed in doing up the belt as I was.
"My lady," he eyed my "dress" with concern, "have you no other attire?"
"None that I wanted badly enough to meddle with," I replied with a cheerful smile. If my plan was to work, I had to be cheerful all day long. Period.
He cleared his throat and put his hand to his mouth as if he was slightly embarrassed, but he didn't really seem embarrassed somehow. He sort of chuckled, a very attractive sound when it came from an attractive man.
"It will have to do then, if you shall be so obstinate," the way he said "obstinate" put me on my guard, I think. He said it as if I were a child, or a younger sister who he felt fondly for.
I smothered my restraint and blinked brightly at him, "do? Do for what?"
He took a step back and bowed deeply, "My lady I am inviting you to accompany me on a walk!"
I breathed a laugh, "Perhaps you have not seen the weather outside, but it is not appropriate for outside activity."
He looked shocked, "Not appropriate? I had thought you would be more adventurous than that."
I laughed again, "Indeed you are right sir, but I have no boots."
"Boots you shall have!" he waved his index finger triumphantly in the air, "And a warm cloak to, this storm is not strong enough to retain a spirit like yours!"
I smiled, he grabbed my hand. I suddenly felt a tingly sensation shoot up my arm and my heart skip a beat. I suddenly blushed, but with my free hand I rubbed it away.
He pulled me through the corridors, "You shall have to barrow some of mine, they will be too big, that I can assure you, but there are ways to fix that. And you shall need a cloak, I assure you one of mine."
He let go of my hand, twirled around and faced me. "You are so beautiful!" He disappeared into a door, calling as he did so, "Don't move!"
He appeared again with two thick cloaks and a pair of boots. With this load, he led me down a set of stairs and into a long sort of room with naught in it but a bench and a narrow door at the end, the room was cold.
I pulled one of the cloaks from his arm as he offered it and I took the pair of boots. I wear as size ten to eleven shoe size normally, and still it surprised me that the boots fit so well. They needed to be cleaned...badly. I put my foot in and was sorely tempted to pull it back out again. Afraid to offend him, I just put my foot in and dealt with it. I would get used to the feeling in about five minutes, I told myself. As I bent over to pull them on, I got a big whiff of myself. And believe me, I wish I hadn't.
It was strange that I had stopped noticing the smell of the castle, but with this sudden realization of what I smelled like, all that odor, yeah, that all came back to me.
Josef von Clausewitz helped me put the cloak on. The weight of it felt good, like a reminder of what my backpack felt like with all the homework I had. It may not sound pleasant to you, but I relished any memory of home, home and showers everyday, and flushing toilets.
He offered his arm to me, and I accepted. And we went for our walk.
It turns out the little door at the end of the room led to the battlements of the castle wall. It was a ledge of stone, perhaps ten feet wide, where sentries could watch for enemies and fight them off as need had it.
I became extremely grateful for that cloak before the afternoon was over.