Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > You Don't Know A Thing About My Sins
Second Chances They Don't Ever Matter, People Never Change
8 reviewsBob gets what they needed and Frank finds Jess.
0Unrated
I make my way around the backstage area, searching the dressing rooms and hallways. She’s not here. How can she not be here? It’s not like she could just disappear. It’s not possible, she has to be somewhere. I walk out to the buses and begin to walk around, checking our bus, the techs’ bus, the guitar trailers. Nothing. I’m about to lose my mind.
Where the hell is she? It’s like she just vanished. It seems that there is no immediate danger, but I won’t feel safe until I find her. I’ve tried her cell a few times, but it’s turned off. Both cars are still here, so wherever she went, she went there on foot. What is going on? Why am I even looking for her? What if she’s just doing this to get me away from the guys so she can hurt them? I’m in way over my head here. I have no idea what I should do.
I check the guitar trailer for the third time and am about to head back inside to look there yet again when Bob runs over to me.
“What’s wrong, why aren’t you with Worm?” I ask, getting nervous.
He beams. “Nothing’s wrong, I had to grab this.” He waves a small home video camera in front of my face. “I figured she’d go for the ceiling flame throwers so I put a camera on them,” he explains. “I was right, I’ve got perfect footage of her tampering with them. She’s even talking to herself. There are some great lines about killing me and making you pay and all that crap. It’s exactly what we needed.”
He looks so proud of himself that I hate to rain on his parade, but something is puzzling me. “If she intended to kill you with the flame throwers, why’d she stop the show before they went off?”
He shrugs. “Who cares? We have all the evidence we need to get her arrested and out of our hair and we won’t even have to tell anyone that you’re not Jason. Besides, she didn’t really stop the show, you did. She just left. Maybe she didn’t want to be there when it went down.”
I shake my head. “She knew we’d stop when she left. She wanted us to stop.”
Bob reaches out and puts a hand on my shoulder. “Frankie, it doesn’t matter. We’ve got what we need. We can have her arrested within the hour.”
I know I should be happy. Hell, I should be fucking thrilled. This is all I’ve wanted for months. But somehow it feels wrong. I just don’t think we should do anything without knowing the whole picture. She’s still dangerous. I don’t want to act without knowing what she’s up to. At least that’s what I keep telling myself. But is that really why I’m so reluctant to turn her in? The look on her face before she left the stage…I just can’t get it out of my head.
“That is if we can find her,” I mutter, not quite meeting Bob’s eyes. “I still have no idea where she is.”
Bob sighs and I realize he’s picking up on my hesitance. “You still love her.” It’s not a question. It’s an accusation.
I look at him, helpless. Hopeless. Ever so subtly I change the subject. “How’s Gerard taking things? I heard you get chewed out back there.”
Bob gives me a look that says ‘I know what you’re doing, Iero, you can’t avoid it forever,’ but thankfully he takes the abrupt subject change with grace. “The guys are with Worm on the bus. Gerard’s pissed but he’ll get over it. Especially once I show him the tape.”
He studies me as he speaks, gauging my reaction. “Don’t show anyone the tape yet, ok?” I ask. He raises his eyebrows questioningly, his expression curious and frustrated.
“I thought you wanted to catch her.” There’s an edge to his voice, asking me what the hell I’m playing at.
I sigh. “Of course I do, just wait a bit, ok?”
He shrugs. “It’s your call, Jason,” he says, stressing the false name. Then he turns and makes his way through the maze of trailers towards the bus.
I trust Bob, and I know he won’t show anyone until I tell him I’m ready, but he’s making it quite obvious that he doesn’t like it. He’s just trying to do what he thinks is best. He doesn’t understand. I want this to end, but I don’t want to hurt her. I don’t know what I want. She hurt me, but does that mean I get to hurt her back? I’m so confused right now. Do I even want to hurt her?
I walk aimlessly around between the buses. I’ve checked here already, but I can’t think of anywhere else to look. I let my feet move, taking me where they please. I find myself walking down the driveway towards the road. It’s pitch black out here, with no streetlights, not even the moon light penetrates the darkness. This is stupid. Even if she’s out here, I won’t be able to see her.
But then I do see her.
She’s sitting on the side of the road, head in her hands. It’s dark out here and I know she hasn’t seen me yet. Her back is towards me anyway. Quietly I walk up behind her. She lifts her head and rests her chin in her hands, elbows on her knees, staring into the darkness in front of her. She knows I’m here and I know she knows I’m here. We don’t speak, we just wait in an awkward stalemate for a long time. Finally she speaks without looking at me. Her voice is soft and if I hadn’t been expecting it I might have missed it completely.
“Do you believe in second chances?”
“No,” I answer truthfully.
“Me either.”
And with that she gets up and walks away from me down the road, leaving me as confused as ever standing alone in the dark on the side of the road to nowhere.
Sorry it's kind of short, like I said before, it was half of the chapter before and I split them up. Anywho, sorry it took so long to update, I rewrote this cahapter like three times, but in the end I went with my first draft. When in doubt always go with your first instinct. Hugs to my awesome reviewers. Love you to pieces (don't make me make that literal).
Where the hell is she? It’s like she just vanished. It seems that there is no immediate danger, but I won’t feel safe until I find her. I’ve tried her cell a few times, but it’s turned off. Both cars are still here, so wherever she went, she went there on foot. What is going on? Why am I even looking for her? What if she’s just doing this to get me away from the guys so she can hurt them? I’m in way over my head here. I have no idea what I should do.
I check the guitar trailer for the third time and am about to head back inside to look there yet again when Bob runs over to me.
“What’s wrong, why aren’t you with Worm?” I ask, getting nervous.
He beams. “Nothing’s wrong, I had to grab this.” He waves a small home video camera in front of my face. “I figured she’d go for the ceiling flame throwers so I put a camera on them,” he explains. “I was right, I’ve got perfect footage of her tampering with them. She’s even talking to herself. There are some great lines about killing me and making you pay and all that crap. It’s exactly what we needed.”
He looks so proud of himself that I hate to rain on his parade, but something is puzzling me. “If she intended to kill you with the flame throwers, why’d she stop the show before they went off?”
He shrugs. “Who cares? We have all the evidence we need to get her arrested and out of our hair and we won’t even have to tell anyone that you’re not Jason. Besides, she didn’t really stop the show, you did. She just left. Maybe she didn’t want to be there when it went down.”
I shake my head. “She knew we’d stop when she left. She wanted us to stop.”
Bob reaches out and puts a hand on my shoulder. “Frankie, it doesn’t matter. We’ve got what we need. We can have her arrested within the hour.”
I know I should be happy. Hell, I should be fucking thrilled. This is all I’ve wanted for months. But somehow it feels wrong. I just don’t think we should do anything without knowing the whole picture. She’s still dangerous. I don’t want to act without knowing what she’s up to. At least that’s what I keep telling myself. But is that really why I’m so reluctant to turn her in? The look on her face before she left the stage…I just can’t get it out of my head.
“That is if we can find her,” I mutter, not quite meeting Bob’s eyes. “I still have no idea where she is.”
Bob sighs and I realize he’s picking up on my hesitance. “You still love her.” It’s not a question. It’s an accusation.
I look at him, helpless. Hopeless. Ever so subtly I change the subject. “How’s Gerard taking things? I heard you get chewed out back there.”
Bob gives me a look that says ‘I know what you’re doing, Iero, you can’t avoid it forever,’ but thankfully he takes the abrupt subject change with grace. “The guys are with Worm on the bus. Gerard’s pissed but he’ll get over it. Especially once I show him the tape.”
He studies me as he speaks, gauging my reaction. “Don’t show anyone the tape yet, ok?” I ask. He raises his eyebrows questioningly, his expression curious and frustrated.
“I thought you wanted to catch her.” There’s an edge to his voice, asking me what the hell I’m playing at.
I sigh. “Of course I do, just wait a bit, ok?”
He shrugs. “It’s your call, Jason,” he says, stressing the false name. Then he turns and makes his way through the maze of trailers towards the bus.
I trust Bob, and I know he won’t show anyone until I tell him I’m ready, but he’s making it quite obvious that he doesn’t like it. He’s just trying to do what he thinks is best. He doesn’t understand. I want this to end, but I don’t want to hurt her. I don’t know what I want. She hurt me, but does that mean I get to hurt her back? I’m so confused right now. Do I even want to hurt her?
I walk aimlessly around between the buses. I’ve checked here already, but I can’t think of anywhere else to look. I let my feet move, taking me where they please. I find myself walking down the driveway towards the road. It’s pitch black out here, with no streetlights, not even the moon light penetrates the darkness. This is stupid. Even if she’s out here, I won’t be able to see her.
But then I do see her.
She’s sitting on the side of the road, head in her hands. It’s dark out here and I know she hasn’t seen me yet. Her back is towards me anyway. Quietly I walk up behind her. She lifts her head and rests her chin in her hands, elbows on her knees, staring into the darkness in front of her. She knows I’m here and I know she knows I’m here. We don’t speak, we just wait in an awkward stalemate for a long time. Finally she speaks without looking at me. Her voice is soft and if I hadn’t been expecting it I might have missed it completely.
“Do you believe in second chances?”
“No,” I answer truthfully.
“Me either.”
And with that she gets up and walks away from me down the road, leaving me as confused as ever standing alone in the dark on the side of the road to nowhere.
Sorry it's kind of short, like I said before, it was half of the chapter before and I split them up. Anywho, sorry it took so long to update, I rewrote this cahapter like three times, but in the end I went with my first draft. When in doubt always go with your first instinct. Hugs to my awesome reviewers. Love you to pieces (don't make me make that literal).
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