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Nothing To Lose

On With The Story)

"Jamie, please hurry up, we're gonna be late," Jamie heard Bryan yell from the basement and chuckled.

He was certain that Bryan wouldn't care less about being late if he wasn't so worried about people flipping out when they finally met him. It was the first time that they would meet Jamie, tonight was when all Bryan's co-workers would find out he was gay.

"Alright, I'm ready," he yelled back and walked downstairs to see Bryan in a black suit, and dark blue tie that Andy had bought him.

Andy was standing next to him in a nice pair of dress pants and a dress shirt. He looked so different from when Bryan had brough him home from the Children's Center. Jamie was quite happy with how he had fit into their lives. He had flatly refused to wear a children's suit saying it would make him look like a penguin. Jamie had heartily agreed and begged Bryan to let him wear the leather pants that had flames on them. He had specifically designed to scare the people at the Christmas party.

Bryan had refused to let him wear it.

"I still can't believe you made me dress nice," Jamie pouted as he kissed him.

"You look sexy in a suit though. You didn't know that," Bryan asked him quietly with a smile.

"Oh, then it's okay then," Jamie said making Bryan laugh.

"Come on," Bryan said rolling his eyes, and they walked out to the car.

Jamie sat in the car quietly when they pulled up to the Children's Home. He had never seen where Bryan worked, and he knew that in the few months he'd been working there, Bryan had started to love the place. He had wanted to badly to fit into this part of Bryan's world, but he wasn't sure if he ever would.

When they walked in the party was already in full swing. It seemed that they had put a part of the room off to the side so the kids could have fun while the adults talked. It didn't seem like an office party at all. It seemed like a family Christmas, and Jamie had to smile at that.

"Bryan, hello," a teenage boy called out.

"Hello Tony," Bryan said with a smile at the other children who waved and went back to their games.

Andy ran off to join the friends he had made while he was there, and Bryan and Jamie headed for the other adults.

"Glad you could make it," Mr. Cutler said with a smile.
"Hello," Jamie said smiling at him. "Who is this lovely young woman?"

Jamie was referring to the teenage girl that was standing beside Mr. Cutler with a look of deep interest aimed at Jamie. It unnerved him to have anyone but Bryan staring at him like that.

"Oh, this is my daughter Sarah, Sarah this is Bryan Matthews and his friend Jamie," he told her.

Jamie was surprised that Sarah didn't catch the subtle hint in the way that Mr. Cutler had said friend.

"Jamie, can I dance with you," she asked, a small blush forming on her cheeks.

"Sure," he said dryly giving an annoyed glance to Bryan as he walked off with her.

"Poor Jamie, he doesn't stand a chance," Bryan said laughing.

"My daughter is sixteen and is the biggest ditz I know sometimes, she didn't even notice that you and Jamie were holding hands," Sharon said with a laugh as she walked up.

"Poor girl," Bryan said with a shake of his head. "Jamie won't hesitate to tell her he's gay if she doesn't catch the hint soon. He's very open."

"I could tell. And he practically worships the ground you walk on," Bryan's boss says with a smile. "No wonder you kept his a secret, you didn't want him to realize they're other men out there."

"Oh right. Like I could stop that, he designs men's clothes. He's surrounded by male models all the time," Bryan said with a role of his eyes.

"And you're not the least bit jealous?" Sharon asked. "I'm telling you, if my husband looked like that, he'd be under lock and key."

"As opposed to what I look like now?" Mr. Cutler asked with a laugh.

"You're a very handsome man," Sharon said. "But you have to agree that Jamie is a very good looking young man."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," Mr. Cutler said causing Bryan to laugh.

"Bryan? You're actually at a business party?" said a female voice behind him.

Bryan turned to see Barbara standing behind him in a short blue dress. Her black curly hair was pulled into a pony-tail and she was smiling at him. She was a woman who also couseled the young children that was brought in, and she'd been hitting on Bryan for months.

"Yeah, decided it was about time I came to one of these and saw what the fuss was about," he said with a smile.

"So, where's your date," Barbara asked. "Mr. Cutler told me if you were coming, you'd be bringing a date."

"Oh, out on the dance floor," Bryan said with a smile and turned back to see if Jamie had gotten rid of Mr. Cutler's daughter yet.

He was surprised to see Sarah walking towards them looking furious.

"You did that on purpose didn't you dad?" she asked furious.

"I did nothing of the sort, if you had been paying attention to the man instead of drooling on his coat you would have noticed, and wouldn't have been embarrassed," he replied dryly causing her to go even redder.

"Sarah, did you see which way Jamie walked off too," Bryan asked her.

"Yeah, towards the bathroom," she said snappishly causing Bryan to laugh.

"I'll be back Barbara. I better go calm Jamie down," he said and walked out the room and down the hall to the bathrooms.
He found Jamie leaning against the wall with his eyes closed, seeming to try and calm himself down.

"You okay?" he asked wrapping his arms around him.

"Yeah, I just had to get away from Sarah, she's quite the little vixen," Jamie said laughing.

"I could tell, she looked like she was trying to rape you out there," Bryan replied laughing again.

"And your laughing at me? Don't I feel loved," Jamie muttered under his breath.

"Of course your loved, or else I wouldn't be here," Bryan told him, putting his hand on his cheek and smiling at him.

Jamie smiled back at him and kissed him long and hard. At least he tried, and then there was a very audible gasp behind them, which caused Bryan to sigh and back up.

"You're gay?" Barbara's shocked voice said.

"Yeah, this is my boyfriend Jamie. Jamie this is my friend Barbara, she goes by Barb most the time though," Bryan told him.

Barbara took a minute to digest the information and smiled. Bryan felt the weight on his chest lift a bit at that, even though he knew she was just putting on a brave face.

"Nice to meet you," she said.

"You too, Bryan's said a lot about you. I'd be jealous if I didn't know he was only into men," Jamie said with a smile.

Barbara nodded and slowly walked down the hallway and back to the party.

"I think someone was hoping to spend the party with you Bryan," Jamie said laughing.

"Apparently," Bryan said, and shook his head.

They walked back into the recreation room, turned party room, and started to dance out on the dance floor. Bryan didn't care what others thought anymore. He was tired of hiding who he really was from his co-workers. The two he spent the most time with already knew, so he had no point in hiding it.
Jamie really blew his cover, when for some reason during the dance; he gave Bryan a long deep kiss right in the middle of the room. Bryan was certain more than one person stopped to stare at them.

After Jamie backed away, he gave Bryan and smirk and Bryan finally knew his reason for the surprise kiss. He was letting everyone know that Bryan was his and no one else's. He didn't need to though, because as soon as he kissed Bryan, Bryan forgot about everyone else in the room.

Bryan smiled at him and placed his hand on his cheek.

"I love you," he said softly.

"I love you too," Jamie said back.

Bryan was about to say something when suddenly someone's hand landed on his shoulder and he turned to find Mr. Cutler looking at him with a smirk on his face.

"Nice show Jamie," he said with a laugh.

"I thought it was," Jamie replied with a smile.

"So didn't I," Bryan said.

"Obviously," Mr. Cutler said and walked off with a laugh.

"I can't believe you just did that," Bryan said laughing.

"I can," Jamie said with a smile.

Bryan shook his head and they walked off the dance floor.

"You ready to go?" Jamie asked him an hour later when they saw Andy start to yawn at the video games.

"Yeah, I think it's time to go," Bryan said with a smile.

They walked over to Andy and told him they were all leaving. Andy nodded, shut off his game, and walked out with them.
On the way home Bryan's mind drifted to an article about Civil Unions in England he had read that morning. He turned to Jamie with a smile on his face.

"How would you feel about going to England for New Years?" he asked him.

"What do you mean?" Jamie asked as he ran his fingers through Andy's hair who had fallen asleep.

"I mean, how would you like to visit England for New Years?" Bryan asked and sighed. "They're allowing Civil Marriages at the end of December. I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you Jamie. I want everyone to know I am with you, so why not?"

Jamie stared at him for a moment then a smile broke out across his face.

"I'd say that's the best New Years gift I could ever receive," he told him. "But you're a horrible at proposals."

"That's why I work with kids," Bryan said with a laugh.

Jamie leaned over and gave him a quick kiss before they continued home. He was finally going to be able to say that Bryan was his and his alone.

"Thank you," Jamie said softly.

"For what? Waning to spend the rest of my life with you? You don't have to thank me for that," Bryan said.

"I know," Jamie said smiling.

It suddenly seemed as if things were looking up for them, and he didn't want them to change.

(End Chapter)