FicWad

“What the fuck does that mean?”
I jumped. I hadn’t realized Gerard had moved so close to me and had read the line over my shoulder. He pulled the paper out of my hand.
“I’m not sure.” I whispered.
He pulled out the chair right next to mine and pulled me around in my chair to face him. “Laura, you know. Tell me. What does it mean?”
My hands began to tremble so I folded them in my lap. “Jenny saved me today.” I whispered.
He nodded, “You said that. But this..” He shook the paper in his hand. “Makes it sound like it wasn’t an accident. What aren’t you telling me?”
I blinked trying to hold back the tears. “Someone pushed me.” My voice shook.
He was silent for a moment then exploded, “Christ, you’re telling me that someone pushed you into traffic? Why the fuck didn’t you tell me before?”
“Gee, don’t yell at me.” I said looking down at my hands.
“What do you mean? I’m gonna yell at you. You could have been killed. It was hard enough to accept that when I thought it was an accident but now I find out someone pushed you? Fuck, you should have never left this apartment. What the fuck were you thinking? Did you see who pushed you? Did Jenny or Alicia?"
“Stop yelling at me.” I said again. This time I lost the battle to hold back the tears and they began to roll down my cheeks.” It all happened so fast. I don't know who pushed me. When the light changed I felt someone shove me." I took a gulp of air. "I just don't know."
Gerard stood and walked across the kitchen. He stood at the counter looking out the window. Several minutes passed before he spoke. “I’m sorry.” He said softly.
I continued to cry. This was the last night we would spend in our home before leaving on tour again and it was ruined.
His voice was deep and full of pain, “Laura, I’m sorry I yelled at you. It’s just the thought of losing you scares the shit out of me. I can’t live without you. If something were to happen to you I know I’d go mad.” He turned to look at me. “Madder than I already am.”
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you but I knew this would be how you’d react.” I said picking up my napkin and blotting my cheeks.
He crossed the kitchen and kneeled down in front of me. “I know you’re not going to want to hear this but I know in my heart you’d be better off if I was out of your life.”
“You’re right I don’t want to hear that and I’m not going to listen to it.” I tried to stand but he gently pushed me back down.
“Someone is trying to kill you because of me. Because of my past sins.” The pain in his voice made fresh tears appear in my eyes.
“Past sins?” I repeated. “Gerard, stop it. You didn’t kill Merri.”
He shook his head, “I know in my heart she was dead yet tell me how she’s on that tape. Tell me how Mikey saw her? I don’t know what the fuck is going on. The only thing I do know is that I can’t let anything happen to you.” He stood up. “I don’t want you going on the tour. We’ll find a safe place for you to stay.”
Now I stood. “Not happening. I’m going with you and that’s final.”
“Laura.” He put out his hand but I moved out of reach.
“Whoever is doing this is trying to fuck up your life. I’m not going to let that happen. We aren’t going to let that happen. Together we are strong. When I married you I promised to stick beside you always. That is what I’m going to do.” I took a step closer to him. “And you promised to always take care of me. I’m not letting you out of that.” I said with a small smile.
He pulled me to him and hugged me tightly, “I just don’t know what to do. I feel so fucking helpless. You have to promise me something.”
I nodded, “Okay.”
“Promise me that on this tour you never go anywhere without Worm. I’ve explained that we have a stalker to him. I told him today what has happened so far, about Jenny’s attack. I’ve known him a long time and I trust him. He’d risk his life to keep you safe.”
“I promise.” I said softly.
"Do you think we should show this to the police?" He asked.
I shook my head, "What good would it do? I have no idea who pushed me today."
"But this." he held up the note. "Proves it wasn't an accident."
I couldn't help but shudder.” Gee, you and I both know why we can't."
The look in his eyes broke my heart, "Yeah, because we don't want to draw anymore attention to my fucking past, my past with Merri and Troy. God, I'm such a fuck up."
I hugged him tightly. "Stop it. Just stop." I whispered.
He held on to me tightly. I could feel the tension in his body. "Laura, please promise me nothing will happen to you or our baby." His voice broke off.
"I promise." I said wishing with all my heart it was a promise I could keep. "I will be very careful from now on."
He nodded, “Now back to the table. You have to eat.” I understood he was trying to push this out of his mind. Still I couldn’t help it I rolled my eyes.
“You know you have to eat healthy.” He led me back to the table and I sat down.
"Gee, I'm not very hungry."
"You promised to take care of yourself and the baby." He reminded me softly.
I nodded. "I know."
“Besides.” He said “You’ll need your strength for tonight. I believe you promised to ravage me.”
It touched my heart he was trying to make me smile. “I never said ravage. I said I was gonna seduce you.”
He took his seat at the table and smiled. “Even better.”

After dinner we both finished packing and then settled down in the living room. I picked up a novel I’d been reading on and off for the past few days and Gerard picked up his sketchbook. I loved quiet times like these. It was wonderful just to spend time together like this. After about an hour I got up and went into the bedroom telling him I was going to slip into something more comfortable. It thrilled me to see that my words caused him to look up and smile.
I had decided earlier in the day to put on one of the outfits I’d gotten when we gone to the Adult Store. Much to my distress the corset wouldn’t fasten. I put my robe back on and marched out into the living room. Gerard looked surprised when I tossed the annoying piece of clothing down at his feet. “Damn thing doesn’t fit anymore.”
It was obvious he didn’t know what to say. I realized that he was afraid he might say the wrong thing.
I crossed my arms in front of me and waited for him to speak. “Uh, well…”
I burst out laughing. “Isn’t it wonderful?”
The look of shock on his face caused me to laugh harder. “Gee it is wonderful. I can’t fit into the damn thing cause I’m pregnant.”
“Shit, woman. I was afraid to say anything. I mean you did mention earlier how you had gained a few pounds and was worried I didn’t find you attractive.”
I moved over to where he was sitting and he scooted away from the table so I could sit on his lap. “Yeah, well I know. I mean I was planning on wearing it to seduce you but I’m just so fucking happy I’m pregnant.”
“This mood swing thing is kinda hard to follow.” He admitted as his fingers moved to my robe to push the fabric apart so he could stroke my bare leg.
I giggled, “Sorry, can’t help it. So I guess I’ll have to go find something else to put on.”
His fingers quickly undid the belt on my robe. “Or you could just take this off.”
I looked into his eyes, “That’s not very sexy.”
“Oh fuck, Sugar. Yeah, it is.” He pushed the robe off my shoulders so that I was sitting naked on his lap. “Believe me, it is.”
I could feel he was telling the truth. “So this is turning you on?" I asked giving him my best innocent look.
He groaned, "Yeah, you're turning me on." He lowered his lips to my shoulder and gently kissed my skin. Suddenly he pushed the rolling chair back even further and moved me on his lap so that my legs straddled him. "Much better." He whispered as his tongue did wonderful swirls just under my ear. I closed my eyes and smiled.
"I love you, Gee." My voice trembled with emotion.
"I love you, Sugar." He said lifting his head and looking deeply into my eyes. "More than I ever thought I could love. You showed me what love truly is." His lips captured mine for a long, deep kiss. When we broke apart we were both breathing heavily. "Baby, do you want to go into the bedroom or do you want me to lift you up on this table?"
Pure need coursed through my veins. "Here." I answered.” Now. The bedroom later."
His eyes flashed desire. He scooted me off his lap and stood. With one quick movement he pushed his art supplies off the table to the floor then gently he lifted me on to the table. I lay back so that just my legs were hanging down. I watched as he striped off his clothes. The man was gorgeous. Once nude he stood between my legs and reached up to cradle my breasts in his hands. I could feel his need pressing against my open womanhood. I closed my eyes savoring the feeling.
"Open your eyes." He commanded. "Look at me."
I was shocked by the look on his face. I couldn't read his emotions and it frightened me. "Gee?"
"If you love me you will do what I say. I have to keep you safe, Laura. I'm nothing without you. Do you understand?" As he spoke the words he positioned himself to enter me.
"I understand." I answered softly.
"Do nothing to engager yourself. Ever." His tone was demanding.
His words caused a shiver to travel down my spine. "We will both stay safe."
"No." He moved back slightly so his body no longer touched mine. "You and this baby are more important than anything. More fucking important than me. Promise me you will never put yourself in danger to protect me."
Now I understood what he was saying. "I will protect our baby with every ounce of energy in my body." I answered hoping he realized it was the truth.
He closed his eyes a moment and I waited. This man, the love of my life was terrified. I understood and it hurt me to the core. I felt helpless. Slowly he moved closer once again. "Laura." My name sounded like a prayer on his lips as he glided into me slowly.
My body welcomed him home. With very slow thrusts he took us to the edge. His eyes locked on mine. No more words were spoken. Our minds and bodies became one.

When the alarm clock woke me from the dream early the next morning I opened my eyes and looked over to see the bed beside me empty. Fear filled my heart but only for a moment. Listening closely my ears picked up the sound of Gerard singing in the living room. It was the song he'd written for me. Closing my eyes I uttered a prayer for our safety on the journey we were about to take. It was as though I knew deep within my soul something was coming, something evil intent on tearing us apart.