FicWad

Disclaimer: Don't own the characters, don't own the basic plot and quotes you recognise from Californication.

WARNINGS: This story is based on the television series "Californication", if you didn't like it or were offended by it, please do not read. I have changed a lot of the plot to suit my own wicked ways but it still includes a lot of swearing, alcohol and drug use, sex in every shape and form and some volgarity. Please do not read if this offends.

Chapter Two - If Jack turns out like me I'll kick my own ass.

Frank despised himself.

There was once a time when he had everything. Yet, it felt like a completely different life time since My Chemical Romance ruled the world. They only had themselves to blame for that disintegration. They were never rock star material, well at least the others weren't. The moment they got families, they slowly but surely moved on until it became quite obvious that the last thing anyone wanted was to write music.

Frank didn't have kids. Sure, he had had a wife, but every time the word 'kids' was mentioned he'd freeze up and promptly disappear for a few days. He was a born and breed rock star, unlike the rest of them. If he couldn't play, then he couldn't function.

Hence his current problem. He couldn't play, therefore he couldn't function. It was like not being able to get a fucking erection. If he couldn't play guitar, what was the fucking point? He wasn't even a small fraction of himself without it.

"Oh you've got to be kidding me," Frank growled, stamping out his smoke as he looked up at the poster on the wall of the local picture theatre; 'Love is all you need.'

It was the movie about the concept album that Frank had worked so hard on. The one that never made it. The one that was bought from him and then twisted and morphed so horrifically that it was now like some evil, demented limb that was a part of him whether he liked it or not. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't remove it.

Unable to help himself, Frank glanced up and down the street, making sure he didn't recognise anyone nearby. Once satisfied there was no one he knew around he casually slipped into the picture theatre, pulling his collar up high, hoping to somehow hide behind it.

"One adult to 'Love is all you need' please," he asked the young teen working at the candy bar. Saying the name out loud made him want to gag.

He grabbed his ticket, handed over the money and snuck into the theatre. It was packed. He hated that! How could anyone watch this sacrilegious garbage?

The movie had already started and he was grateful for that, it meant the cinema was in complete darkness, save for the eerie glow of the giant screen. He slipped into a seat on the edge of one of the rows and sunk down low, hoping to god no one saw him.

Not even fifteen minutes into the movie Frank found himself squirming uncomfortably at the pile of shit that played out before him. Worst part was, his name was on the fucking poster for the damn fucking thing!

It was then that a phone started to ring causing several people to start cursing and whispering to their partners at the inconsiderate prick who decided he was too good to turn it off like everyone else had to. What was worse, the fuck head was right in front of Frank. What was even worse was that he answered the stupid thing.

"Oh hey babe, what's happening? - Yeah, I'm in some shit movie - dunno babe but the writers should be shot!"

Frank ground his teeth together in frustration. It was not a good day to piss him off. Leaning forward, he tapped the shoulder of the arrogant ass hole who was still chatting away loudly to the person on the other end of the phone.

"Hey, you mind? Some people are trying to watch the movie," he said, deciding to take a calmer approach then he actually wanted to.

"Hang on babe," the guy said as he moved the phone away from his ear and stared at Frank incredulously. "Do you mind, it's an important call."

"I'll bet it is," Frank muttered as the man turned back around and put the phone back to his ear.

"Yeah, sorry babe, some short-assed punk guy is trying to hit on me." With that the man turned around to smile wickedly at Frank before facing the front once again.

It took all the strength Frank had left in him to not smack that fucking smile off the guys butt-ugly face right then and there. Yet, he wasn't about to let him get away with his cheek either, so he leant forward and quickly snatched the phone out of the man’s hand.

"Hey, you little fucker!"

"Hey hey - yeah, I know, I'm afraid he's going to have to call you back babe," Frank said to the women that was asking where her boy friend was through the speaker pressed to his ear.

"Give that the fuck back!" the guy warned, cracking his knuckles.

Frank moved the phone away from his ear. "Do you mind? I'm trying to have a conversation here!" Then, just to make sure he had stirred up all the shit he could, he put the phone back to his ear and said, "So ... what are you wearing?"

"Fuck you!" the man shouted as he lunged at Frank and snatched his phone back. Luckily, Frank was too quick for him and managed to hang up on the annoying female before the bastard could return to his conversation.

The man just glared at Frank and shook his head in what was no doubt supposed to be a threatening manner. Then, as they finally settled down and returned their attention back to the movie, the man’s phone rang out again.

"Don't you fucking dare," Frank warned as the man pulled the phone back out of his pocket, looking at Frank smugly as he answered it.

"Hey babe, yeah, sorry about that - this stupid shit -"

But he never got to finish his sentence, because Frank had had enough. Swinging forwards again he tore the phone out of the man’s grasp once more, but this time he tossed it as hard as he could right at the cinema floor. It split apart, the face going in one direction, the back in another and the battery flying off down a few steps. The man was livid.

"You fucking little shit!" he cried out as he threw his entire body at Frank.

Fighting was what he did best lately and Frank was ready for him. Swinging with all the anger and all the hatred he had boiled up inside of him. Punch after punch connected with the man’s skull until he finally just gave up and lay down next to his broken phone.

Panting, Frank barely even noticed as the entire cinema erupted into a satisfying round of applause. Recovering, Frank just took a bow and muttered his thanks as he kicked the thug one last time in the ribs before exiting the cinema.

"You might want to do a quick clean up in there kid, some guy got beat up," Frank said to the teen at the candy bar before walking out of the building.

His hand hurt like hell from all the punching, but he was glad for that small release of tension. It felt good to let out all his anger on other people. Very satisfying, to say the least.

Yet, in all honesty, it was days like this that Frank hated. Slow days. When there was nothing and no one to do. It made that incredible loneliness that hovered above him like a small rain cloud press down onto him lower and lower until he was all caught up in its never ending storm. He missed the days when he had someone. He missed Gerard, he missed Jack and he wished to hell and back he had of known how much he would miss them when he actually had them.

As he passed a music store in the strangely quite streets, one of the CD's advertised in the front window caught his attention. It was the fourth and final My Chemical Romance CD. It felt almost surreal to see the beginning of the end of his life staring him right in the face like that. Who would have guessed a single album could cause so much fucking pain.

Unable to help himself, he walked into the music store. Considering the streets were so empty, he was surprised to find the shop quite busy. A group of young teenage boys, predominantly dressed in black, flicked through CD after CD in the 'Punk/Rock/Emo' category. Frank made a mental note to avoid them at all costs; they looked the types that would recognise him immediately.

"Can I help you sir?" a young girl with purple hair and a nose ring questioned Frank as she looked him up and down, chewing gum too loudly to be allowed.

"No, I think it's pretty self explanatory," Frank responded with a sarcastic smile as he pointed out the fact that everything was labeled. He really fucking hated that. Some CD's you just couldn't put into a category, yet they did it anyway. Everything had to have a place.

It was then that Frank's attention was caught by an attractive brunette who was standing at the music station, over sized head phones cupping her ears whilst she hummed along to the very same CD Frank had seen in the window.

Unable to help himself, he made his way over to her, pretending to be interested in a CD close by until she finally made eye contact with him and pulled the headphones off her ears.

"I'm sorry, did you want to listen?" she asked, a hint of sarcasm in her voice as though she really didn't give a shit if he wanted to listen or not. There was no doubt that she was just trying to asses why he was fucking staring at her.

"No thanks. I've had enough of that CD for one lifetime thank you."

She didn't return the headphones to her ears but rather looked at Frank a little more closely this time. Her eyes boring into his giving off that nagging feeling that told him she was no doubt undressing him with her eyes.

"So, you're like some big time rock star or something then?" she questioned, a smile playing across her perfect lips. Frank watched them closely, licking his own out of pure habit.

"Something like that," he played along, rather liking the fact she wasn't all over him the moment she recognised who he was.

Her smile only widened as she put the headphones back onto their rightful spot and continued to watch Frank with great interest.

"I like the old stuff better."

"So did everyone else apparently. It was a hard act to follow, even if it was our own. Guess the heart just wasn't in it anymore," Frank explained, breaking the eye contact only to glare at the offending CD.

The girl watched him closely, clearly trying to asses whether he was some washed up artist or just a genius on a much needed break. Frank just stared right on back at her. No one could read him, no one understood him and that was enough to guarantee a night in the sack with anyone. Women loved a man of mystery.

"So ... Your place or mine?" she finally asked.

Frank didn't need to hear those words twice, he knew what they meant, he knew that look she was giving him. He had no idea how old she was, no idea who she was but she was there. He was lonely and she was willing and ready enough to help him cure that, if only for a short while.

It was lucky his place was only a short walk away because the moment she had given him that proposition he had instantly gone hard. As soon as his front door was flung open they simply lunged at each other, lips colliding in a sloppy kiss.

"You've done this before, I think," the brunette continued to mess around with him as they hastily removed their clothes.

As per usual routine, Frank barely even gave her body a once over. Sure, she was an attractive girl, but he didn't fuck anything that looked his way because he actually wanted to. Sex was sex. Sure he enjoyed it, what male didn't, but that wasn't the point. He got enough sex to not need it, he didn't long for it, it was nothing special. The only reason he did it, was for the company. The contact made him feel like he was alive.

"Are you going to cum?" the girl ridding him suddenly asked, snapping him from his thoughts. He wasn't even paying attention during sex anymore, that was a problem.

"Guess so, I don't see why not," he managed to say through heavy breaths. This only made the girls smile widen. He laughed at that, she was really something else.

Their movements became more frantic, every now and then they even fell out of rhythm with each other. They were both so close, Frank knew he was ready, she had done the job well, he was going to cum, the orgasm making him forget about everything in his shitty life, if only for a few moments.

"Oh fuck," he moaned as he knew she had done it, he was there. But right before he released himself inside her, she punched him right across the face. "What the fuck?"

She continued to move until her eyes closed and she let out one final desperate groan as she had no doubt reached her climax as well, Frank just looked on in confused astonishment as he clasped at his aching face.

"That was fun," she said breathlessly, then with one final innocent looking smile she climbed off him, grabbed her clothes and marched out of the room.

Lying there, still clutching at his aching head, Frank just laughed. It was all he could do, because she had certainly taken his mind off all of his problems.

--------------------------

Even though Gerard had long since left school, he still felt that sense of impending doom as he walked to the principles office, Lindsey clutching at his hand in that same way she always did. It was possessive, almost as though she was afraid to let go for fear Gerard would run off.

"Maybe he's a bully. Maybe he beats up the other kids," Gerard said, voicing his fears. He was bullied all through school, he hated the thought of his own son doing the stuff that was done to him to other kids.

"Jack, a bully? Please Gerard, you know him better then that. I'm sure it's nothing, she probably just wants to discuss why he didn't hand in his homework last week," Lindsey tired to reassure him, but Gerard was still panicky.

"He's six! What does it matter if he doesn't hand in some stupid 'fill in the blanks' sheet? No, this is serious, I can tell."

He felt her hand clutch at his, if possible, even more tightly. When he looked at her, a little annoyed at the clinginess, she simply smiled at him the way she usually did. How could he blame her for being so insecure though? Somehow he felt that that too was all his fault.

"Good afternoon, please come in. I'm Mrs. Abigail, but Sandra will do fine," the principle of Jack's school greeted them kindly.

Gerard wasn't fooled, this was serious business, he could just tell.

"I'm Lindsey and this is Gerard," Lindsey introduced them as Gerard seemed incapable of doing so.

"Please, sit down make yourselves comfortable, I promise I wont take up too much of your time, I just want to talk to you about a small problem I noticed with Jack."

The principle, Sandra, jumped slightly when Gerard let out a panicked sort of noise. Clearly she hadn't expected him to be so tense. Clearly she didn't know him at all.

"He's a bully isn't he?" Gerard let out before he could stop himself. Sandra just laughed.

"No, no, he is a lovely boy. It was more Jacks - um, how do I put this? It was more his sexuality that I wanted to talk to you about."

Silence. Instant and so thick you could stir through it with a spoon. It tasted awful. Gerard just refused to take his eyes off the principle, even when he could feel Lindsey’s' burning an angry hole into the side of his head. Somehow they had been waiting for this for a long time.

"W-what do you mean his sexuality?" Gerard questioned, snickering slightly, trying desperately to lighten the mood. "He's only six!"

"It's more that, well I think he's just a little confused as to what is correct behaviour and what isn't. I'm sorry; I'm not explaining this very well."

"No you're not!" Gerard let out again. Immediately he apologised knowing that he was getting too caught up. He didn't even know the whole story yet, it would just be something silly, it had to be.

"I found Jack with one of the older boys behind the staff lunch room yesterday. The older boy was - and I don't want you to be alarmed because it is being dealt with - but this older boy was - um - feeling him up, lets just say, and -"

"WHAT?" Gerard shouted out, standing up in a show of outrage before Lindsey hurriedly pulled him back down.

"Don't Gerard, just let her finish," Lindsey shot out, squeezing his hand again in order to try and calm him.

"Lindsey, did you hear what she just -"

"Just let her finish!" Lindsey commanded again. This time Gerard did as he was told, wriggling his hand free of hers so he could fold his arms across his chest.

"Believe me Gerard, I was just as surprised and angry as you were and we have taken all the proper steps to make sure something like this doesn't happen again. But I've got to tell you that the whole ordeal was not my biggest concern, it was more what Jack said to me when I asked him why he let the other boy touch him that worried me."

Gerard still couldn't control his anger. It led him to wonder what sort of a messed up family life that other kid must have to even think of touching his son like that. It was a primary school after all, it was just wrong.

"What did he say?" Lindsey asked, noticing Gerard's silence and taking over again.

"He said that he thought it would be okay, that that was what two boys were supposed to do. He said he thought he was supposed to enjoy it." With those final words Sandra fell silent.

The reality of it all smacked Gerard across the head so hard he almost tumbled off his chair. This was all his fucking fault!

He just remained seated in guilty silence as Lindsey thanked the principle and excused them both from the room. Gerard couldn't swallow, he couldn't breathe, he knew the conversation that was going to follow, and sure enough, the moment they were out of ear shot of Mrs. Abigail, Lindsey turned to face him.

"Fuck Gerard! I knew something like this was going to happen. I should have never let Jack stay with you two; I should have kept him away!"

Even though Gerard blamed himself as well, he didn't like to hear it out loud, he didn't want to hear another "I told you so," from her ever again.

"So you're saying you should have taken custody away just because I was seeing a fucking guy! Oh that's great, let’s send him that message instead shall we? Maybe he can grow up to be a fag hater, god knows me need more of them."

"I'm not saying that Gerard, you know I'm not. I just wish - fuck - why couldn't you have just - you know what ... No, I'm not going to do this. We're just going to have to talk to Jack, explain it to him and - I swear Gerard, no more. I don't want Frank around my son anymore!" Lindsey stuttered out, their voices harsh whispers as classes were still going on all around them and they didn't want the kids to come out and see Jack's parents fighting.

At the mention of Frank, the fury and the fight was back. Jack was the only sort of stability that Frank had left in his life, Gerard couldn't let her take that away from him. He had promised himself that he would never do it to him, no matter what Frank did or had done in the past, he didn't deserve that.

"Fuck Lynz, this isn't his fault! I was in that relationship to you know and Jack is my kid, I should have been more careful, me, not Frank, it has nothing to do with him. You can't stop him from seeing Jack, it's too cruel. I swear I'll fight you on this one, I can't do it to him."

The anger was still sizzling through him even when Lindsey just shook her head and sighed at his words. He knew she wasn't that heartless, but he also didn't blame her for loosing her head. This news about Jack was not good, how were they supposed to talk to him about something as complicated as all this?

Gerard was now extremely glad he had convinced Jack not to tell Lindsey about the naked women he saw in Frank's bed, he could only imagine the different path this conversation would divert along.

"Can we just, go home and try and sort this shit out properly?" Gerard asked, feeling slightly defeated. Talk of Frank always just managed to wear him out.

Lindsey nodded as Gerard pulled her in for a hug. She rolled her eyes at him like she always did when he would hug her after a fight, but it was returned nonetheless and as they pulled apart, both were smiling now.

"How are we supposed to explain this one to Jack?" Lindsey asked rhetorically as they walked back out of the school and into the sunshine, Gerard's hand wrapped around her shoulders.

As they made their way around the side of the school, their car coming into view, Gerard noticed another, much classier car parked right behind them, one that he recognised.

"Speak of the devil," Gerard said, tightening his grip on Lindsey so she wouldn't flip out.

The man that owned the car was casually leaning against it. Black jeans hanging loosely from his back side, his batman boxer shorts sticking out over the top. The Misfits shirt he wore and the punk-style hair cut he always sported made him look about half his age. There was something about the way he just stood there smoking the cigarette, that was held like a joint in between his long fingers, that Gerard still loved.

"Frank, to what do we owe the pleasure?" Gerard asked, as Frank's face immediately lit up at the sight of him.

"The car Gee, it got me here in one piece. You don't know how much it means to me to hear that you're pleasured by my presence."

Lindsey let out a noise of frustration by his side and Gerard quickly rubbed her arm to try and sooth her.

"Wait in the car Lynz, I wont be long," Gerard whispered to her. He couldn't have a conversation with Frank whilst Lindsey was around, the two just clashed too much, they would never get anywhere.

"Don't be long," she shot back, glaring at Frank all the way to the car where she slammed the door hard behind her.

"What a lovely girl friend you have. She's always so full of rainbows and sunshine."

"What are you doing here Frank?" Gerard asked, getting straight to the point.

"Mikey called, we're hanging out tonight," Frank explained, pulling his lighter out of his pocket and flicking the lid on and off as he spoke.

"That's great Frank. You drove here just to tell me that?"

"Well, no actually. He told me you and Lindsey had been called into the school because something was wrong with Jack. I guess, I just wanted to come here and make sure everything was alright."

Gerard sighed heavily as he ran a hand through his hair. Frank watched the movement with hungry eyes and Gerard figured it was best to take his hand away. The way Frank could stare at him like that still made him feel as insecure as fuck. Gone were the days when they could kiss each other and rub up against each other on stage and come off just laughing and joking about it as though it was nothing. There was so much more history now that sometimes he despised it, always wishing they could go back in time and change it all.

"So? Is everything alright?"

"No, everything's not alright, we messed up," Gerard said without thinking. He wasn't even sure why, but for some reason, it was easier to talk to Frank about the problem then it was to talk to Lindsey about it, she just didn't understand sometimes.

"What do you mean? What happened? He's okay isn't he?"

"Yeah Frank, he's fine. One of the older boys had his hands all over Jack behind the staff lunch room, feeling him up or something."

"Wait ... WHAT! The kids fucking six years old, what's there to feel?" Frank yelled out, stepping off his car and looking around as though trying to locate the little bastard and beat the living shit out of him.

Gerard just laughed at Frank's reaction. He had made the right decision when he had told Lindsey that Jack still had to have Frank in his life. The guy loved that kid so fucking much.

"I know right, apparently it's being sorted out though Frank, so calm the fuck down. But ... worst part is, Jack didn't see anything wrong with it, he thought that was what boys were supposed to do to each other."

"Oh fuck ... Gee, I'm fucking sorry man," Frank said, shaking his head, more at himself then anything else.

"Come on Frank, it's not your fault. I mean, he was with us when we were in a relationship; these things are bound to happen. All part of learning I guess." It was funny how mere moments ago Gerard had been the one to flip out, now he was the one trying to calm Frank whilst he did the same thing.

"You know Gee, he saw a naked chick in my bed, you think that would have fixed his problems."

Gerard laughed again, watching Frank a little too closely which was probably why, when Frank turned his head a bit, Gerard saw a nasty bruise wrapped around his right eye.

"Shit Frank, where'd you get the black eye?" Gerard asked, stepping closer out of habit and tilting Franks head back slightly to get a better look. "You haven't been fighting again have you?"

He could feel Frank relax at his touch and quickly pulled his hand away. There was no subtlety with Frank.

"I'm sure it was something like that Gee. Hey look, if you need any help talking to Jack, just let me know. I don't mind having the whole sex talk thing with him."

"Thanks Frank, but I think Lynz and I should deal with this one. Hey, say hi to Mikes for me okay?"

It was clear Frank was a little surprised that their conversation was over, it didn't take him much to forget about Lindsey’s existence sometimes, but Gerard had to cut it short. He didn't like these good conversations with Frank because the truth was that it was easier to hate him when they weren't getting along so well.

When he got in the car and smiled at Lindsey, just to keep the peace, he couldn't help looking back in his review mirror, just to watch Frank pull up his pants to make the leap over his car door and into the drivers seat.

It was definitely easier to move on when they would argue.

----------------

"I swear to you Iero, if my nephew turns out like you, you're fucking dead, do you hear me?" Mikey announced fiercely as Frank finished telling him how his day was.

"You and what army Mikey? You know I can kick your ass. Remember how we made ourselves on 'The Sims' and you were so busy getting your Sim to change his hairstyle everyday that you failed to notice mine was busy working out. When I slept with your Sim wife and your Sim tried to kick my ass, do you remember who won Mikey? That's right, little Frankie Sim. Don't think you're so fucking tough."

"God Frank, you still remember that? You need to get a life dude, seriously! And I'll get Bob to kick your ass. Even though he has a soft spot for you, I'm sure he can be persuaded otherwise, you know how much he loves Jack."

"Don't worry Mikes. If Jack turns out like me I'll kick my own fucking ass. How is Bob anyway?" Frank took a sip of his beer and continued the conversation as though it was perfectly normal for them to speak to each other like this.

"Bob is good; he actually admitted that he misses you like hell the other day."

"You know he can come and see me at anytime, I'm always there, just sitting around, waiting for a visitor."

"He's busy with his babies Frank, you know that. There's nothing stopping you from going to see him." Mikey finished the last of his beer and raised two fingers to the barman to let him know they were ready for another round.

"I think I'll wait until the twins grow up a bit first. What if he makes me hold one of them? What if I drop it?" Frank downed the rest of his beer as another was placed in front of him by the barman.

"You know Bob wouldn't let you hold his precious little girls Frank. He's not that stupid!"

Frank just smiled before busying his lips once again on the rim of the glass full of beer. He couldn't help but be grateful for the fact that, even though he and Gerard had their problems, there was no bitterness between himself and Mikey. Except maybe tonight, but that was Mikey's fault.

"I can't believe you set me up on a date. You could have told me when you rang up today, you know I hate dating people," Frank whispered to Mikey so that Alicia and her friend, Franks date, didn't hear what was being said.

"Come on Frank, it's for your own good man. You seriously have to move on, it's getting pathetic."

"Yeah well, what can I say? Your brother was a good fuck, that's hard to find now-a-days," Frank said a little louder this time, smiling in satisfaction at the look of disgust on Mikey's face.

"Fuck Frank! Why do you always have to go and put that shit in my head?" Mikey protested, staring at his beer as though it had suddenly lost its appeal.

"Oh come on Mikes, haven't you ever wanted to know who was bigger. I can give you that information, of course, I've never seen you naked though," Frank continued to stir, it helped distract him from the thoughts of the inevitable conversation he would have to have with Alicia's friend. He hated the old "so, what do you do?" small talk.

"And you never will Iero. I don't want my brother’s sloppy seconds."

"Ewww Mikey, that's gross. You're gross!" Frank exclaimed, scrunching up his nose. Mikey went bright red.

"Are you boys ready to eat yet or not?" Alicia called out from the table behind them.

"I don't think I'm that hungry anymore," Mikey complained, sipping at his beer cautiously.

"Course you are Mikey. Now come on, I really want you to introduce me to my date."

This wasn't the first time Mikey and Alicia had tried to set Frank up on a blind date. They did it often. It hardly bothered him though; sometimes he would get quite a good fuck out of one or two of them. Still, it did wonders for the level of his self-esteem, which was already rock bottom. He couldn't even get his own dates anymore; his friends had to do it for him.

As they sat at the table eating their over cooked meals, a price guaranteed to be paid whilst eating at a bar as dodgy as that one, silence fell upon them. Frank realised he didn't feel up to conversation, he'd rather go home and get high tonight.

"So Frank, what do you do exactly?" Kellie, the blind-date, questioned, clearly not being able to take the silence anymore. And there is was! He hated her already.

"Nothing. Absolutely nothing. What do you do?" he said bluntly, all social skills out the window with his manners.

"That's not true Kellie, don't listen to him," Alicia jumped in. "Frank used to be in 'My Chemical Romance' with Mikey, he is the most energetic guitar player you will ever see. Then, when they split up he was in 'Leathermouth' and 'The Chainsaw Trio' and - what was that clothing label Frank - Skeleton Crew, that's the one?"

Frank cringed at the mention of both his side bands. Leathermouth was, as far as he was concerned, the reason he lost Gerard and, The Chainsaw Trio was the reason he lost everything else. The fucking base, how he hated that instrument.

"And, lets not forget, he was practically the brains behind a concept album he had prepared for Leathermouth, which they never got around to recording. But, someone got wind of it and then voila a little movie called 'Love is all you need' was born," Mikey added, smiling wickedly at Frank.

"Thanks shit head," Frank whispered, shaking his head as though trying to rid himself of the reminder.

"You're joking right? I love that movie! Who would have thought you'd be such a romantic guy," Kellie commented, clearly smitten now that she had uncovered Frank's dirty secret.

Frank put down his fork and stared at his supposed date. She was attractive and usually Frank would have loved to continue to lay on these false pretences until he could convince her to go home with him. But not tonight. Tonight he was too busy picturing Gerard walking out of that school, his arm resting around Lindsey’s shoulders as they chatted happily about their son.

"Excuse me a moment," Frank announced, ignoring Kellies excited smile. He pushed past Mikey and made his way outside the bar, he needed a fucking cigarette.

"What was that all about?" Mikey asked as he appeared next to Frank, grabbing the cigarette out from his fingers just so he could have a quick puff of it.

"Fuck Mikey. I can't do this tonight. I'm not in the mood," Frank admitted, snatching the cigarette back.

"God Frank, look at you, you're a fucking mess! You need to keep busy, you need to move on. When was the last time you even looked at your guitar?"

"Just leave it alone Mikey, I already said, I'm not in the fucking mood."

Mikey just stared at Frank sadly, he hated that look. He knew Mikey was only trying to help, but he really didn't want to hear it from him anymore.

"Come on Frank, lets just go back inside. You know, Kellie's actually a really nice girl when you get to know her," Mikey tried to reassure him, he didn't buy it.

"Then why don't you fucking date her. I'll find my own fuck for the night thanks Mikey."

Frank flicked his cigarette onto the ground and waved one hand lazily at Mikey as he turned around and walked in the direction of another pub he knew just down the road.

"Frank, come on, come back here," Mikey called out after him, but Frank just kept on walking until he reached a bar that he was satisfied was far enough away from them all. He hastily went straight up to the bar and ordered another beer.

He had had enough of women for the week, no more. There was just something about them that could get so damned exhausting sometimes. That was probably why, when the band playing that night had finished, he found himself hitting on the lead-singer. The guy was actually quite entranced by the fact that Frank was in fact the Frank, the famous guitar player and all that shit. Naturally, he took advantage of that.

"So, you wanna get the fuck out of here?" Frank proposed after he had had enough beer. The guy wasn't all that bad looking, it had been a while since Frank had taken another male home; he didn't really mind the idea of it at the moment. .

"I thought you'd never ask," the singer said, smiling brightly at him.

Like so many other times after a night out at the bar, Frank barely made it through the door of his apartment before he was pinning this other man against the wall and desperately trying to strip him of his clothes.

"Oh fuck that's good," Frank whimpered as the singers erection pressed up against his own. It was probably the one sensation he missed about being with guys. Straight men were missing out on so much. There was absolutely nothing wrong with a bit of mix and match.

They finally made it to Frank's bed, naked and panting, hands wondering all over each other. It had been so long since he had bought a man home that he seriously didn't even know where to begin. But, soon enough, his hands were groping for his phone instead of any body part as it rang out somewhere amongst the discarded clothes on the floor.

"Don't answer it," the singer moaned in annoyance as Frank wriggled himself free of the embrace.

Frank found his phone underneath his boxer shorts and was started to see Gerard's number flashing across the screen. It was after midnight on a Friday, that was the day Gerard put aside for nothing but painting, all fucking day long. He usually went to bed pretty early. If he was calling now, then something was wrong. Ignoring the singers hand on his back he answered the phone.

"Gee, what's up? Everything alright?"

"Frank, are you busy?" It was the first question Gerard always asked when he called this late, because nine times out of ten, he was busy, just like tonight.

Glancing at the perfect naked body of the singer next to him he made a decision. Something was definitely up with Gerard, he wasn't that busy, there would be plenty more chances to make up for lost time during the week.

"Nope, not at all. Why? Talk to me, what's happened?"

"I-it's Jack. I just - fuck. Frank he followed Jess to this stupid party; I think he was just curious, you know what he's like. She just called me to say that she didn't and that she was going to bring him home when he just disappeared. It's a big party, I have to go over there to get him ... Frank, I have to find him."

"Yeah, yeah, breath Gerard, it's alright, he'll be fine," Frank reassured him. On the inside he was panicking, but he had to be calm for Gerard. "You want me to come get you? We can look together."

"C-can you Frank? Lindsey’s out of town and my stupid car wont fucking start. You're not too drunk to drive or anything are you?"

"No Gee, I'm not. Look, just wait out the front, I'll be there as soon as possible," Frank said, ignoring Gerard's little comment about his drinking habits.

"Thanks Frank."

With that he hung up the phone and looked apologetically at the naked man sighing in frustration next to him.

"I'm sorry. Emergency, maybe we can pick up where we left off some other time?"

-------------

It was late, so Frank just drove through the red lights. After all, what did he care, they weren't there for him, they were there for everyone else, he didn't have time for rules.

When he drove up and over the side walk out the front of Gerard's place, he could already see him pacing impatiently by his front door.

"Come on Gee, get in, lets go find that fucking kid of yours," Frank said, noting how stressed out he looked. Gerard just nodded numbly as he opened the passenger door and sat down.

"Thanks again Frank, really," he said, looking at his feet rather then at Frank.

Frank just grinned as he steered the vehicle in the direction Gerard had given him.

"So, I don't understand. I mean, shit, Jacks a fucking baby! What's he doing at a party? Who is this Jess girl anyway? Baby sitter? She needs a good kick up the ass."

"Jess is Lindsey's step daughter Frank, I'm sure I've told you that before."

"Oh that's right. The one her second husband dumped her with? Man, you have one fucked up family Gee, you know that right?"

Gerard just laughed slightly as he clasped at his head as though the whole thing was just one big fat headache.

"Believe me Frank, I know. But she's a good kid, I mean, she'll be my step daughter - once removed or some shit like that pretty soon. It's not her fault; I think Jack just wanted to see what she was doing, so he followed her."

"And now he's missing at some teenager’s party? Fuck! The drama never ends with you Gee. He certainly inherited the Way's love of partying," Frank said, trying to keep the conversation away from talk leading him to the reminder that Gerard and Lindsey were going to get married, he didn't want to think about it whilst Jack was missing.

The moment they pulled up outside of the house that the party was going on at, they went into instant panic. The party was fucking huge.

As they jumped out of the car and began searching the house for, no doubt, the smallest person there, they spotted teenager after teenager, smoking, drinking, making-out or smashing things. This was not something a six year old was supposed to be doing on a Friday night.

"Fuck! Where is he?" Gerard yelled out in frustration as Frank approached a group of teenagers that looked sober enough to hold a conversation with.

"Hey, you seen a little boy round here? He's about - erm - this high," Frank raised his hand up, just above his knee to show what he meant. "Er, maybe this high ... wait - could be a little taller," Frank said, adjusting where he placed his hand. He was bad at these sorts of things.

"You mean the beer kid? Yeah, he's round here somewhere," one of the group exclaimed, smiling wildly as though remembering some great memory.

Gerard was at Frank's side so fast it made him jump. "Beer kid? Beer kid? You gave him beer?"

"Gee ... GEE!" Frank repeated, a little louder this time as Gerard started lecturing the teens. "I've found him."

Frank pointed to a small group off to the side of the party. In the middle of that group was Jack, he was alive and well. Just as quickly as he had arrived, Gerard was leaving Franks side, making his way over to his son.

"Jacky, you scared the shit out of us man," Frank exclaimed as Gerard grabbed his son and hugged him so tightly that Frank was afraid he was going to smother him.

Jack was quite silent as he just looked at the two of them, his breathing slightly erratic.

"I don't feel so good," he said weekly and with that he promptly threw up, just missing Gerard and Frank.

"Fuck! How much beer did you dick heads give him?" Frank shouted at the hovering group angrily whilst Gerard comforted the now slightly teary-eyed Jack.

"What? None, he had like two sips just now, complained it tasted funny and stopped. We were just keeping an eye on him," a boy who looked like he was probably the biggest geek of the entire party explained.

"It's yucky," Jack said, rubbing his sleeve on his tongue, clearly trying to brush off the taste.

Frank just watched Gerard fuss over his son in silence; he knew he was going to blame himself for this one. He always did.

"Alright, come on Jacky, home time," Frank decided to announce as Gerard seemed incapable of forming words.

"I'm sorry daddy," Jack sobbed out as he must have noticed the blank expression on Gerard's face. Frank just shook his head.

"Can we please go? Come on - up," he instructed Jack as he pushed past Gerard and bent down to pick the boy up in his arms. "That means you too, Gerard, I'm too old to be seen at these type of parties now."

With that Gerard seemed to snap out of the beginning of his self-loathing stage and nodded at Franks suggestion. He still had that vacant expression on his face and it worried Frank because he knew what Gerard was thinking.

The two of them walked through the party and out to the car in silence. Jack was nestled quite comfortably in Frank's arms as his small fingers traced the scorpion tattoo on his neck. It made Frank just hold him tighter. It was such a tiny gesture of affection, something he hadn't received in a long while. No one touched him like that anymore.

When they were all safely in the car and Frank was driving them back home, Gerard seemed to snap out of his thoughts as he turned around in his seat to face Jack.

"What the hell were you thinking Jack? You know better then to leave the house! And you know better then to take a drink that's offered to you by people you don't know. That's an adults drink! You already know that!" Gerard yelled, clearly coming out of the initial shock he had been in at his six year old son being at a party for high school kids, at the very least.

"But Frankie does it!" Jack said, his bottom lip trembling as he stared at Gerard in shock.

"Fucking hell," Frank complained as he pulled up in Gerard's drive way. That was all he needed to make himself feel more like shit.

"And do you really want to end up like him?" Gerard finally asked his young son, causing both Frank and Jack to look at him in surprise.

"Ouch Gee, fuck," was all Frank could say before, to their great surprise, Jack finally snapped.

"No! I don't want to end up like either of you! Why do you have to fight all the time? Why do you have to be so different from everyone else's parents? I hate you both!"

The small boy undid his seat belt and climbed over the top of the door, no doubt copying the way he'd seen Frank do it on so many occasions. He landed on the pavement and ran to the front door, pushing it open and running off up the stairs.

"I think you forgot to lock your door," Frank stated as Gerard got out of the car and slammed the door behind him. "Look Gee ... I'm sorry alright, I just -"

"I don't care Frank," he interrupted, running a hand through his hair. "Can you - um - can you just come inside please?"

Frank just stared.

"Seriously?"

"Yeah, come on."

Not waiting around for Gerard to change his mind, he leapt over the car door and followed Gerard into the house. Once inside, Gerard just collapsed into one of the designer chairs near his expensive, glass coffee table. Frank took the seat opposite him, inspecting the house and all it's latest additions. He could tell what belonged to Lindsey because her and Gerard had such different tastes that her items stood out like an elephant at a shopping center.

"I'm a bad father Frank," Gerard finally said, letting out a heavy breath he seemed to be holding for a very long time. Here it was, the speech Frank knew had been coming.

"You're not a bad father Gee, these things happen."

"These things happen? He's letting older boys at school feel him up and he's running off to party's and drinking beer. Sounding familiar? He's going to be some older guys little bitch and he's going to be an alcoholic, just like me. Fuck, this is all my fucking fault."

Gerard leant forward and placed his head in his hands. Frank had to admit that he wasn't expecting this. He was sure he was going to get a handful of words from Gerard that would no doubt be so deep and hurtful that he'd spend the next month trying to drink the memory of them away.

"Last I checked, Bert and I were the only one's that ever made you our bitch Gerard and we're both younger, so I don't see how he's like you. Oh, and it was a mouthful of beer and he threw up and said it was yucky ... somehow I don't think he's going to start having a six pack every day."

Resurfacing from his hands Gerard laughed lightly as he rolled his eyes at Frank. They sat in silence for a few moments, staring at each other every now and then until Gerard’s smile faded and he just shook his head.

"Fuck Frank. When are you going to start playing again? When are you going to write some songs and start to get a band going?"

Frank almost laughed at the way Gerard could always bring this shit up when they were doing so well. He couldn't figure out why Gerard always wanted to argue with him. It was like he found it easier to hate him.

"Why'd you call me tonight Gerard? You could have rang Mikey, he would have been here just as fast," Frank watched as Gerard tried to think of a good enough excuse.

"I want you in my life Frank and I want you in Jack's life. Don't look too much into it."

"Whatever Gerard, I know a part of you still wants me. She can't be as good in bed as I was," Frank said proudly, crossing his arms across his chest as though that was the end of the conversation.

Gerard knew better then to fight him when he was in this kind of mood. Things would just be said, too many memories brought back up, neither of them wanted to go down that path again.

Silence fell upon them once more and Frank just watched as Gerard played with his hair, clearly thinking over the nights events. He loved thoughtful Gerard, just the way he would brush his fingers through his hair as though it had been cut short for the first time in years all over again. Every now and then Gerard licked his lips, the simple gesture driving Frank insane.

"Gee ... marry me," he finally decided on saying.

"What?" Gerard asked, looking back at Frank with that confused look in his eyes.

"I said, marry me. Fuck Lindsey, marry me Gerard. I can't play without you, I can't think without you and every fucking day I see you, you still drive me crazy," the words spilled out from Frank’s mouth before he could stop himself.

"Oh I get it. So what, I'm like your one trick pony, that it Frank? Use me for a little bit of inspiration, disappear for weeks on end and then come back when you need a bit more. Or when you need to get laid, cause you were so good at returning for one night here and there just to release some of that tension that touring left you with."

There was bitterness in Gerard’s voice now as Frank just leant back in his chair and shook his head. One thing Gerard never understood, he didn't work without music, he didn't work without touring, he needed that. Just like Gerard needed his paintings all the time, Frank needed music. And just because his need kept him away from home more then Gerard's did, it didn't mean he was to blame.

"I didn't use you for anything Gerard, you just wanted too much commitment, I couldn't give you that!"

"Commitment? God Frank, I wasn't asking you to come home by a certain time and cook and clean and all that shit, I was merely asking you to be there with me. You know, that's what you're supposed to do when you're in love. I left my wife and my kid to be with you and you were never even fucking there!"

Gerard's shouts were suddenly interrupted when the front door swung open and in walked a pretty young brunette that Frank recognised immediately. It was the girl he had picked up at the music store, the girl he had taken back to his place, the girl that had punched him in the face. What the fuck was she doing at Gerard’s house?

"Oh shit!" Frank exclaimed, standing up and backing away just slightly, Gerard stared at him in confusion as he simply shook his head at his antics.

"Er - Frank, this is Jess, Jess, this is Frank, he's - um - he's a friend," Gerard explained to the brunette making Frank wonder if Gerard's soon to be step-daughter knew anything about their previous relationship.

"Oh ... nice to meet you Frank," Jess said cheerfully as she watched Frank with that same wicked smile.

"Um - yeah - likewise, or whatever."

Jess undressed him one last time with her eyes before returning her gaze to Gerard.

"Look Gerard, I am so, so sorry, I didn't know he was following me. I swear as soon as I found him I tried to bring him back here, but he just disappeared. I'm really -"

"It's alright Jess, seriously. It's what he does best after all," Gerard interrupted her, making her smile warmly at him again.

"What happened to your eye Frank?" Jess asked, a mischievous glint in her eyes.

"Yeah, what did happen?" Gerard asked, returning to the question that had gone unsatisfactorily answered the last time they ran into each other.

"Told you Gee, got into a fight."

"She really did a number on you then." Jess' smile widened.

"He really did a number on me ... I don't fight girls. It was a he," Frank corrected, hoping to god she didn't open her mouth and say anything. If Gerard knew what Frank had done, he was sure it would be the end of their very delicate relationship.

"Whatever, good night, I'm going to bed," Jess finally announced, winking at Frank as she walked away. Gerard just sighed when she was out of site.

"She's sixteen Frank, don't even think about it," Gerard said, watching him closely.

"W-what? Gerard, please. I wouldn't dare," Frank stuttered out, because really the only thing running through his head was "fuck, she's sixteen!"

"Whatever Frank, I don't think there's anything you wouldn't dare do at the moment. Just - you have to go Frank, please. I'll talk to you later in the week alright?"

Frank just laughed at the abrupt goodbye. It was always the same, when Gerard was finished, that was it.

"Fine, see ya round. And by the way ... you're welcome!"

He left the house and slammed the front door bitterly. It was alright when Gerard would call up asking for help, but if Frank ever called with one of his problems, well, he wasn't even sure if he could rely on Gerard to help anymore.

The drive home was quite and lonely. No one else was on the streets this late and he didn't even bother turning his stereo up. The silence somehow seemed to suit the empty feeling in his heart. Any hope he had for himself and Gerard to one day sought things out was now almost completely gone. He felt so drained.

Frank barely even registered parking his car and walking into his house, he just stared at the floor in the lounge room remembering when he used to come home from a performance to find Gerard teaching a three year old Jack to draw a little Frankenstein monster. He wanted to get it perfect to show Frank when he got back. The picture was still on his fridge.

Feeling extremely defeated and somehow wishing that the singer he had picked up tonight was still around, he did the only thing he could think of. Walking to the darkest corner of his room, he picked up his guitar and gripped it tightly. His fingers almost cried out in delight at that cool sensation of its wooden neck and metallic strings. They had missed the feeling.

He sat down on the edge of his bed and held the instrument accordingly. But as he thought of Gerard and Lindsey, happily married with Jack and Jess, his fingers didn't move.

Frank couldn't play one single note.

Frank still couldn't fucking play.

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AN: The response to this has been amazing. I thank you all for the reviews and I hope you enjoy this chapter just as much. It felt something was a little rushed in this, I'm not even sure what, it just felt like that. But still, it's up, it's here and I'm mostly happy with it. Thank you all for reviewing. And sorry for any spelling eras, I'm only human :(