FicWad

Disclaimer: Don't own the characters, don't own the basic plot and quotes you recognise from Californication.

WARNINGS: This story is based on the television series "Californication", if you didn't like it or were offended by it, please do not read. I have changed a lot of the plot to suit my own wicked ways but it still includes a lot of swearing, alcohol and drug use, sex in every shape and form and some volgarity. Please do not read if this offends.

Chapter Three - Blow job right here and now say's I’m gay!


“I’ll tell you Gerard, no matter how hard I try, I just can’t fucking play anymore," Frank complained as he pushed his foot down onto the break pedal as they pulled up at a red light.

Gerard sat in the passenger seat, his hair brushing against his face gently in the cool summer breeze. If the light had of turned green at that moment, Frank wouldn't have even noticed, he was too busy infatuated with the man next to him.

"Frank, you'll find your muse again, you just need to relax," Gerard explained, flashing his perfect stage smile as his eyes locked with Frank's.

"How the fuck am I supposed to relax Gee?" Frank whined knowing that if it was that simple he would have picked up his guitar and started playing it a long time ago.

Gerard just flicked his tongue out to slide it along his bottom lip as he was clearly thinking it over. The action only caused Frank to stare so hard that he began leaning in without even noticing he was doing so.

"I'm pretty sure I can help you out a little bit in that department," Gerard said, that cheeky grin back on his pale face.

His voice dripped with such a seductive tone that Frank found himself moving in closer and closer until he was merely centimeters from Gerard's perfect features. Gerard was the one to finally close the gap as his soft lips brushed ever so lightly against Franks.

Frank dared to put a little more pressure into the kiss and was relieved when Gerard accepted by wrapping his arms around his neck and sliding his tongue into his mouth. They remained like that for mere moments before Frank found himself groaning in pleasure as Gerard's hand made its way down to his crotch.

"And now I'm definitely not relaxed," Frank explained lazily as he bit gently on Gerard's bottom lip causing him to whimper slightly.

"No?" Gerard questioned, his hand now sliding underneath Frank's jeans to rub against the tension that lay behind the thin layer of his boxer shorts.

Frank moved his hips forward, desperate for more pressure; Gerard was being far too gentle with him.

"No. I'm too fucking turned on to relax! Would you just grab it already," Frank complained in frustration, lowering his own hand to push Gerard's further against his erection.

"You're so impatient!" Gerard drawled, rolling his eyes as he rested his forehead against Frank's.

Still, he seemed to think it over until gradually he obliged, wrapping his warm hand around Frank's cock and gripping so tightly Frank sat up higher in his seat in surprise.

It was at that moment he heard someone beep their horn. The harsh sound assaulted his precious imagination and the image of Gerard, so close to his face it almost felt real, vanished as he realised he was now alone in his car, still idly waiting at the red light.

"I've never seen someone so turned on by a red light before," a female voice called out to him and Frank instantly whipped his head around to find a pretty looking blonde watching him closely from the pink convertible pulled up next to him. There was no sign that Gerard had ever been sitting in his passenger seat.

"It's the car actually. I can't explain it, I just get incredibly turned on every time I climb inside of it," Frank explained, covering up his vivid daydream with a line that no doubt had a big effect on the blonde as she giggled at him seductively.

"You're in a band, right? I've seen you play somewhere before," she called out, not even glancing up at the traffic light to see if it had changed.

"Something like that."

"Well, I've got something I want you to listen to actually," she stated, biting her bottom lip.

"Oh yeah, and what's that?"

The blonde reached into her glove compartment and pulled out a small business card, she quickly scribbled something on the back of it with a pen she produced from her hand bag and then promptly flicked it so it glided gracefully onto the passenger seat of Frank's car where Gerard had been sitting moments ago.

On the front was the usual dribble that every salon business card had on it, but as he turned it around he saw a messy phone number and a small smilie face staring back at him.

"If you call that, you can listen to me climax at the sound of your voice as you talk about your car for as long as you fucking want," she said to him, flashing another toothy grin.

At that moment the light changed and the blonde blew him a kiss before screeching off in her pink convertible. Frank just shook his head and sighed as he stuffed the business card in his jeans pocket before flooring the accelerator as he usually did, after all, speed was distracting.

He had no intention of calling the blonde in the pink convertible, not unless he was desperate, instead he made a quick and rather unplanned right hand turn and headed for Gerard's house.

The day dream he just had was still fresh in his mind and that was probably why he had the sudden change of heart, even though he knew there was very little chance of it ever becoming real.

Frank pulled up out the front of the modern, two storied house only to realise that his park was in fact perfect. Feeling slightly off that he had managed such perfection at such a speed and state of disarray, he quickly put the car into reverse and then, as he clicked it back into drive once more, he spun the wheel at a sharp angle so the front tyres rolled up and onto the side walk.

"Much better," he said, satisfied at the illegal park he was now positioned in.

"Seriously Frank, what the hell is wrong with you?" a female voice called from Gerard's home.

He knew who it was before he turned around and made his way towards the figure standing at the front door. After all, if he didn't manage to piss Lindsey off every visit he made, it would certainly be a wasted trip.

"I know, I was just thinking the same thing! For a second there my park was almost perfect! I think I'm unwell," he replied as he finally reached the scowling face of Lindsey, still standing rather protectively in the doorway.

"Jack doesn't want to see you, you know. You upset him the other night," she said, crossing her arms across her chest.

Frank just rolled his eyes uncaring as he moved around her and stepped through the door. Whatever Lindsey was, she wasn't that much of a bitch that she would fight him and push him away, just so he couldn't get into the house. When he thought about it though, she honestly didn't need to bother going that far, because deep down, she knew she had already won. She had Gerard, Frank didn't.

"Frankie!" came an excited squeal from the top of the stairs the moment Frank entered the lounge room of Gerard's home.

"Jack! You miss me buddy?" Frank said as he smiled smugly at Lindsey. He knew she had been wrong, of course Jack wanted to see him, that kid could never hold a grudge.

The small, dark haired boy ran down the stairs and stopped on the last one, just so he could get enough height to jump up towards Frank. Slightly unprepared, it was pure instinct that let Frank catch him in time. He stumbled, but only slightly, at the new weight in his arms. It frightened him how much Jack was growing, but he brushed the feelings aside for now.

Jack buried his head into Frank’s neck, his feather like hair so soothing against the side of his face that Frank rubbed into the top of his head with his check. The boys small fingers traced over the scorpion tattoo again as he clutched so tightly onto Frank's shoulder with the other hand that Frank thought he was trying to make himself a permanent fixture to his body.

"I'm sorry Frankie, I don't really hate you," Jack explained as he continued to nuzzle into Frank's neck.

Lindsey let out an annoyed sort of sound as she just shook her head, clearly not pleased that her son had forgiven him so easily.

"Oh hey Frank, what are you doing here?"

Frank squeezed Jack one more time for good measure before placing him back on the ground so he could great the new addition to the lounge room properly.

"Hey Gee, you implying that I need an excuse to come round and see you now?" Frank grinned mischievously as he watched Gerard walk past him only to stand by Lindsey’s side. It was a good thing Jack was still standing so close to him otherwise he would have felt really left out.

He watched as Lindsey threw her arms around his waist, drawing him in closer to her. Gerard kissed her on the forehead and brushed away some of her hair as he did so. Frank felt his stomach clench at the show of affection they were exchanging. Fuck he hated when they pulled shit like that.

"So Frank ... what did you really come around here for? Because god only knows, you only come around when you want something," Lindsey said, slightly more smug this time as she now had something that Frank didn't ... Gerard.

"Well, I came around to see if I could borrow Jack tomorrow, maybe go out, do something fun, what do you say Jack?" Frank asked, ruffling the boys hair as he bounced up and down excitedly.

"Yes, yes! Oh please mummy, can I?" Jack asked, clutching onto Frank's jeans as he continued to jump up and down. "Can we see your movie Frank? Can we?"

Frank immediately cringed at Jack's words, because it wasn't his movie! It would never be his fucking movie and he certainly didn't want Jack to grow up thinking he had anything to do with that pile of shit.

"No! Absolutely not, out of the question," Lindsey announced, letting go of Gerard to step forward slightly.

"What Lindsey is trying to say Frank," Gerard said, clearly covering for her harsh response. "Is that we have a few people coming around tomorrow and we wanted Jack to be here for it."

"Ah, gotcha."

Frank stared from Lindsey, to Gerard and then back to the crestfallen looking Jack. He knew where he wasn't wanted; sometimes he wondered why he even still bothered to try.

"But daddy, it's just Uncle Mikey and Aunty Alicia, Frankie knows them to, why can't he come?" Jack asked, still clutching tightly onto Frank's pants almost as though he would refuse to let go if they didn't agree that he could come too.

Gerard and Lindsey gave each other a look, clearly sending some sort of subliminal messages to one another. Finally Lindsey let out a deep breath she seemed to have been holding for years before turning back around to face Frank.

"You're welcome to come Frank," Lindsey said, the words seemingly causing her some kind of pain as her face twisted in an odd sort of expression.

Frank just smirked at her before turning to Gerard, waiting for his consent as well.

"Absolutely ... you can even bring a date if you want to," Gerard said causing that tightness in Frank's chest to start up again. He didn't date, Gerard knew that.

"Aw, if you want me there Gee, I'll be there for you ... but are you sure you can handle me bringing a date? Would you be able to stand me looking into the eyes of someone else with that same affection I used to hold only for you?"

"God Frank, don't you think it would be nice for Jack to see us all get along for a change," Gerard shot back, shaking his head in frustration at Frank's words.

Looking down at the small, hopeful looking boy still clutching tightly to his pants, Frank knew that he couldn't turn down the offer. But that didn't mean he was going to behave.

"Yeah, yeah. I'll be here," Frank said, shrugging off Gerard’s words. He was annoyed that the other man clearly couldn't take his jokes anymore. He hated what Lindsey was doing to him.

"YAY! Do you mean it Frank? Will you really come?" Jack asked, bouncing around again.

"Yes, absolutely, for sure, can't wait. What can I bring? Stupid question, you know I wont remember, see you then," Frank shouted out, forcing his voice to sound as excited as Jack's was.

His words only made Jack jump around even more excitedly until he finally let go of Franks pants, seemingly satisfied that he would be returning soon enough, and ran over to hug Gerard around the middle instead.

"He's coming daddy, Frankie’s going to come back!"

Gerard bent down to kiss the top of Jack's messy head of hair before looking up at Frank and smiling, actually smiling. Frank's stomach did a small flip, he was quite proud of himself today, clearly he had just done something right.

"Excellent! Well, until tomorrow, good bye. And Linda, Lila, Linds - oh fuck - whatever, see ya tomorrow," Frank said as he headed towards the front door, not wanting to miss one last opportunity to piss her off, even if she was nice enough to invite him to lunch.

As Frank got back into his car and drove off, still feeling very proud of himself, his phone started to ring. He almost laughed. It was so fucking typical for the stupid thing to go off just as he was driving.

Finally locating the damned object, he clicked the talk button and put the phone to his ear.

"Hello?"

"Frank! Dude, guess what. Oh hell, you'll never guess ... I found you a job!"

Frank pulled the phone away from his ear to look at the number. It was Mikey, just as he had suspected by the voice. But why the hell would Mikey be calling him about a job?

"Ah, thanks pal, but last I checked I wasn't really that concerned with my current state of unemployment."

"You need to fucking play the guitar again Frank! You can't function properly without it. So, I got in touch with some of my friends and sure enough, there's a local band that need a guitarist so badly they're willing to do whatever the hell you want just to have you."

"Kinky."

"Come on Frank be serious!" Mikey's voice said loudly in his ear. "I need you to give me an answer now, because they need you to play for them tonight. You should seriously take this Frank; the band is going to be huge!"

"Fuck Mikey, you know I can't fucking play! What use is it being in a band if I can't even perform?" the frustration was back, he felt useless once again.

There was a long pause, Mikey was clearly hesitating over the next few words that were about to leave his mouth. "Well, you won’t exactly be playing rhythm guitar so -"

"FUCK! Don't tell me I'll be playing base!"

"Frank ..."

"Don't you fucking say it Mikey!"

"You'll be playing base!"

"FUCK!" Frank pulled the phone away from his ear and resisted the urge to throw it at the passing road beneath his car.

Frank Iero did not like playing base, he would much rather have his balls cut off then be forced to play that cursed instrument.

"Come on Frank, it's just to get you back into the swing of things. I know it's not your thing but -"

"Not my thing? Not my thing!!!!!!! Mikey! You know how I feel about that piece of shit instrument; I can't believe you even - FUCK!" Frank pulled the phone away from his ear once more, forcing himself to breath.

"Fuck you Frank! Just remember, I play that piece of shit instrument that you're so ruthlessly bashing," he heard Mikey say, even though the speaker was a few inches away from his ear.

Placing the phone back onto the side of his face, Frank sighed into the speaker.

"I didn't mean anything by it Mikey, you're good at it! To me, base is just the end of the countdown. It means I've officially lost all the energy and talent I once possessed. I'm now no longer able to play my own instrument; I have to play someone else’s instead."

"I know that Frank, but, come on, just do this one thing. It's a start; you'll be jumping around hurting yourself and everyone else again in no time. You need to do this Frank, you need your life back again," Mikey said, feeling it was safer to progress now that Frank had calmed himself down.

Frank let out another deep breath and punched the steering wheel in frustration. He couldn't believe he was about to do this.

"Alright, I'll fucking take the job."

"You will? Finally! Oh shit - Frank - fuck - good boy. I swear, you're doing the right thing here."

"Yeah, yeah. What's this band called anyway?" He hoped to god it wasn't some boy band shit, he couldn't handle that right now. But he knew Mikey; he wouldn't dare to do that to him.

"They're called 'Pledge for the broken' and they're doing really well. Man, I can't wait to see you jumping around on that stage again. I have a feeling your names going to be up in lights again in no time, who knows, maybe even a tour," Mikey said, sounding hopeful.

It was suddenly all sounding quite fucking strange.

At first Frank had taken Mikey's pushing and shoving and then his apparent excitement to mean that he was just looking out for Frank, perhaps even feeling slightly guilty about the whole situation he was in at the moment. Now though, at the mention of fame and a life of touring again, Frank couldn't help but wonder if Mikey was perhaps living through him. Maybe Mikey wasn't quite as settled into marriage life as he seemed to be, after all, he had been married to Alicia for a long time now and he had never even heard them mention the idea of kids.

"Great, touring with a bunch of guys I don't even know all that well, sounds like a dream come true," he said, slightly bitter.

Touring with My Chemical Romance was one thing, he had known the guys for years, touring with some random group was definitely not on his list of favourite things to do.

"Come on Frank, stay with me here, positive thoughts. You can do it. Now listen carefully okay. They need you at Charlie's Bar on Westcourt Street at 9 p.m. tonight. Just go back stage; the security will know who you are. Make sure you take your base with you. Are you sure you got all that?"

"Yeah, yeah. Westcourt Street, Henry's Bar, 8 p.m."

"What? Frank!"

"I'm kidding Mikey, I got it. Anyways, I really got to go. I'm sure the cops are just dying to get my license suspended and talking on the phone isn't probably the smartest thing to do. I'll see you at lunch tomorrow anyway man."

"You will? You mean, you actually got an invite? I don't believe it? What did you do? Buy Lindsey a holiday home or something?"

"No, she just finally realised what a lovely person I really was," Frank said casually as Mikey's laughter rang out in his ear.

"Whatever man, I'll see you then."

With that the phone went dead and Frank just threw it onto the passenger seat as he thought for a few moments. Finally deciding on a different course, he quickly pulled over and chucked a u-turn right over double lines. After all, the road rules didn't apply to him.

Gerard and Lindsey’s exchange that morning kept running through his head. This wasn't just a game anymore, Gerard had really moved on. Perhaps all the glances and flirtatious little comments directed at him were all just part of his wild imagination, had he really lost his chance with Gerard? Was that it, was it really all over?

All these thoughts racing through his head was probably the reason he didn't play all that well later that night.

He arrived at the bar just in time to meet the band he would now be playing for and the dicks he would now be sucking to help them get somewhere beyond shitty little bar gigs. Being a small band wasn't easy and he hated that his life seemed to be going dramatically backwards. The base lines weren't hard to learn and in half an hour he was already playing them with great confidence.

When they finally took to the stage Frank knew Mikey had been right about one thing, the band had serious potential. Mikey had also been right about another thing, it felt fucking fantastic to be back on the stage again.

Even though he came off feeling like he could have put a lot more into his performance, the band was all over him, congratulating him on a job well done and begging him to continue to play for them. It was the best he had felt in a long time, he couldn't turn the offer down.

At the bar that night they were mauled by girls and people from various record labels trying to buy them drinks. Frank couldn't help but smile, he was back!

------------------------------------------------------

Gerard's house was a miniature mansion. Sure, it didn't look all that different from all the other houses in the street, but on the inside, it was like stepping into some five star art gallery.

All the furniture was hand made by some modern designer that Frank had never even heard of and all the sculptures and paintings were either made by Gerard, Lindsey or someone they knew through the comic book industry. After all, that was the only industry Gerard really associated with these days. If it wasn't art, he wasn't in it.

Frank sometimes wondered if Gerard even missed the music scene anymore. Sure, Lindsey was still touring with Mindless Self Indulgence; she even owned her own record label now, something she did just to show the world she wasn't just 'Mrs. Gerard Way'. But, Frank couldn't help but wonder if Gerard missed My Chemical Romance. It had certainly been the best years of their lives, yet he seemed to show no remorse at its loss.

"Frank? Did you come here just to see me?"

The seductive female voice snapped Frank out of his thoughts as he realised that he had somehow managed to walk around the back of Gerard's house and to the pool area without even paying the slightest bit of attention.

"Woah! Er - no - um," he stammered, trying to look away from the bikini clad teenager in front of him.

Jess was Lindsey's step daughter. Hell, she was going to be Gerard's step daughter soon. She was going to be Jack's fucking step sister! And Frank had been dumb enough to sleep with her without even asking who she was and how old she was.

Sixteen! That was a mistake he knew would come back around later to fuck him up the ass.

"Frank, you made it," Lindsey called out to him as she walked out onto the patio. Even though Frank had said he'd come, she still seemed surprised to see him.

"I'm pretty sure I told you I would."

He forced himself to keep staring at Lindsey, staring at Jess just felt wrong after what he had done. Lindsey seemed to stop in her tracks though and notice something wrong with the way Frank was acting; after all, he hadn't even said anything remotely bitchy to her yet. That was definitely a first.

"Maybe you should get dressed Jess, we have company now," Lindsey said, looking cautiously between Frank and her step daughter.

"And maybe you should stop staring Frank, she's a little young for you don't you think," Lindsey added after Jess had given Frank one last wink before over swinging her hips as she walked back into the house.

"I don't think ... you should know that by now."

He pulled out his pack of cigarettes, placing one in his mouth and shoving the rest back in the pocket of his ripped jeans. Lighting the end of it, he sucked in the poisonous gas as though it was the first breath of fresh air he had had in years.

"Gerard said you'd quit smoking," Lindsey said, making idol chit-chat as she made her way around the pool, Frank followed her, not having much else to do.

"Guess I started up again."

Lindsey stopped and turned around so quickly that Frank almost fell backwards at the effort it took to stop himself from bumping into her.

"Look Frank, lets just try and get along today, okay? I don't like you, you don't like me, I think that's fair. But for Jack's sake, for Gerard's sake, I think we should at least try to get along. This is an important step Frank; don't fuck it up and for gods sake stop messing with Gerard's head. He's already messed up enough over this whole thing, I'm just starting to get him to think straight again."

"Sounds like you're brain washing him," Frank said, ignoring most of her words as he just puffed on his cigarette.

Lindsey opened her mouth to say something else back, but she was cut off by the arrival of Gerard and some women that Frank didn't recognise. She was tall and slender with long, jet black hair and sparkling blue eyes. If Frank hadn't of been so busy looking Gerard up and down, he probably would have found her to be quite attractive.

"Frank, come over here, I want you to meet Kat," Gerard announced, walking over to Frank and Lindsey before waving his hand in front of the tall girl as though he was presenting her at a ball or something.

She stuck her perfectly manicured hand out and Frank took it, not wanting be rude.

"I've got to say Frank, I love the way you play. I saw you playing at a local bar one night a long while back now, and I was just entranced by you," Kat said, sounding slightly flustered.

"Well thank you very much," he said, trying to be polite, but his eyes were still wondering over to glance at Gerard.

He had on a pair of tight black jeans, a white belt and a black button up shirt. He may be all artsy-fartsy now, but he still looked every bit the rock star that used to love performing on stage. It only made Frank more and more captivated by him. The guy was certainly a fucking mystery.

As entranced as he was at the site of Gerard, Frank couldn't help but feel a mounting anger as he stared at him. After all, this was clearly a set up, Gerard had obviously invited Kat to be a date for Frank. Whilst under normal circumstances Frank would just get over it, the whole idea of Gerard finding this girl for him only made him realise more and more that Gerard was trying to get rid of him, he was trying to help him move on.

Frank didn't want to move on.

"Um, just excuse us for a moment please, I really need to talk to Gerard about something. Won't take a second, promise," Frank added as he noticed the look Lindsey was shooting him.

Gerard just shrugged his shoulders and followed Frank, who had now made his way into the house so that they could talk out of ear shot of the two girls now chatting amongst themselves by the pool.

"Frank ... what?"

"Don't you, Frank what me! Fuck Gee, what is this? Why do you and Mikey always feel you have to set me up with someone?"

"Come on Frank, I just thought you'd feel a little less left out if you had someone to talk to. She's attractive isn't she?" he threw in, causing me to shake my head in frustration.

"I can't believe this! What if I wanted to be with a guy tonight, huh?" Frank snapped back, not having anything else to fall back on.

Gerard just laughed and shook his head.

"Frank, you're not gay!"

"I'm pretty sure fucking a guy entitles you to being gay Gerard, and last I checked I fucked you! And enjoyed it to I might add," Frank shot back, lowering his voice and craning his neck to make sure the others still couldn't hear.

"Yeah Frank, but you were never gay! That was the problem. You enjoyed sex, that was just you trying to relieve some of that pent up energy you had, trying to live, trying to experiment. But, when it came to being in a relationship with another guy, well, we all know you couldn't pull that one off. Intimacy wasn't your thing unless you were with a chick ... and that is why you're not gay Frank!"

"Blow job right here and now say's I’m gay!" Frank risked saying, stepping in closer to Gerard.

"Just, try and have fun Frank, alright?" Gerard shot back, placing a hand on Frank's chest to push him away slightly keeping him at bay.

With that, Gerard walked back outside to join the girls whilst Frank made his way to Gerard's fridge. He needed beer and he needed it fast, especially if he was ever going to try and have some of that fun that Gerard was talking about.

It was a good thing Lindsey still drank, if she had of gone cold turkey like Gerard had long ago Frank knew he wouldn't find anything in their fridge. But, lucky for him it was filled with beer. After all, Mikey still drank too, they had probably bought some to assure there was enough for the guests and as Frank grabbed one and twisted the top off it, he was grateful for that.

"Hey man, hitting the beer already?"

Mikey entered the kitchen only to wink at Frank and open up the fridge door to grab his own beer. When he twisted his own top off he clashed his glass lightly to Franks and together they drank.

"That's to you man, I got a call from Gary, you would have met him last night, he's the lead singer of that new band of yours. Well, he said he'd never seen a base player like you, wanted to thank me for finding you actually, just thought I'd pass the info along," Mikey said, smiling at Frank as he downed his beer rather quickly.

"Yeah, typical. I finally play again and it just has to be the base. Still, you were right, I had fun."

"You want another beer? I'm almost done," Mikey suddenly shouted out, perhaps a little too loudly. Frank just stared at him in confusion as Mikey swung the fridge door open again.

"Everything alright man? You look - oh I dunno - like a big pile of steamy shit," Frank admitted, taken the offered beer from Mikey's hand. Even though he hadn't finished the one he already had, he knew he would need the second one straight after.

"Lunch is up guys," Gerard announced, ducking his head into the kitchen just to call out before he quickly disappeared again.

"Come on, I'm starving," Mikey said, ignoring Frank's question completely. He didn't press the matter, instead, he just followed Mikey to the already, rather crowded dinning table.

"Hi Frankie," Jack called out, spitting whatever food had been in his mouth practically across the table.

"Jack! Don't speak when your mouth is full," Lindsey yelled at him, silencing him almost immediately. "And it's Frank, not Frankie."

Frank gave a small wave to Alicia as he took the only empty seat available to him. It was right between Kat and Jess. If he hadn't of known any better, he could have sworn Lindsey did it on purpose. Just like she had no doubt cooked sausages and steak on purpose too. Frank didn't eat meat, she knew that.

"Here Frank," Gerard said, passing Frank the salad bowl and looking almost apologetic at the amount of meat on the table.

"Thanks."

As Gerard handed over the salad bowl, Frank almost dropped it onto the table in surprise as a hand was placed on his upper thigh, rubbing small circles that sent a wave of heat rushing up to his crotch.

Instinctively, Frank turned to look at Kat who was watching him closely, her hand still making those small sensual circles. It was at that exact moment that his head spun around to look at the girl on his opposite side now as a second hand landed, not on his leg, but right on the rising erection that was trying to break through his jeans.

Coughing quite loudly, if only to cover up the moan he had been about to let out, Frank watched Lindsey closely, hoping to god she couldn't somehow see through tables and see where her sixteen year old step daughters hand was.

He reached his own hand under the table and tried to push Jess' away, but she was persistent and it was back again, more forcefully this time as she made it quite clear she wasn't messing around.

"Daddy, can I get a dog?" he vaguely heard Jack ask Gerard as he battled with his penis, begging it to stay down.

"Isn't our family big enough without having to add to it?" Gerard asked in reply to Jack's question. Frank looked up, ignoring the hands fiddling around by his thighs, it was the first time he had noticed just how warn out Gerard actually looked.

"Oh shit!" Frank let out, a little unexpected as both hands dove into his lap at the same time, finding a rather sensitive spot. Jess was smiling next to him as she tore her hand away, clearly not wanting to get caught out in the middle of her fun. Kat's hand simply returned to his upper thigh.

"Are you right Frank? Do you always have to make a scene?" Lindsey asked. Every face at the table was now looking at him.

Finally Mikey raised his glass, clearly sensing that Frank needed a cover up of some sort. He gave him one last look of confusion before obviously deciding what he was going to toast to.

"Well, here's to Frankie I guess. Because he's finally got his lazy ass back on stage again," Mikey announced proudly.

"You did? How? When?" Gerard asked, suddenly becoming quite interested.

Frank grabbed his napkin and threw it across his lap in one last ditch effort to hide the hands playing around down there.

"Er - last night. A band called 'Pledge for the broken', they're actually really good, you should come watch us play sometime," Frank offered, noting a strange look on Lindsey's face. He didn't have time to comprehend what it was though.

"You're playing Frankie? Can I come and see?" Jack asked, sitting up higher in his chair at this news.

"You can do whatever you want," Frank said, noting the proud look Gerard had on his face. He definitely felt slightly better about himself now.

"So, I've got to ask ... how did you and Lindsey meet Gerard?" Kat asked innocently, watching as everyone went fairly quite.

"Oh! Let me tell this story, it's such a good one," Frank chimed in sarcastically when he realised no one else was going to. "Hm, well I do believe we were all touring as My Chemical Romance at the time and Lindsey and her band happened to give us the time of day and let us perform before one of their shows. If I recall correctly it was all fireworks and sparks and shit like that. They were both art nerds you see and even though Lindsey hates comic books, Gerard was desperate and well -"

"- we were both actually seeing other people at the time, but eventually we met up again, only that time around, we were both single," Gerard finished for him, clearly noting what bitter path Frank was going to take their story.

"And you've got a six year old son and you're not even married yet?" Kat looked slightly confused, but she seemed to be enjoying the story nonetheless.

"W-well ... we separated for a while," Gerard explained as Lindsey took a rather large sip from her beer.

"Oh! Sorry, I shouldn't have brought it up," Kat said, turning her attention back to her plate.

"It's alright. We've all moved on since then, haven't we guys?" Frank responded to everyone's silence in a chirpy manner. Mikey looked at him in hidden amusement, Alicia looked between Lindsey and Gerard rather nervously.

"So how did Frank and you meet then?” Kat asked Gerard, clearly wanting to keep the conversation going but wanting to go down a slightly different path this time.

“Parties ... lots and lots of parties. With beer and music and other illegal substances,” Frank explained shamelessly, noting the awkwardness that had washed over the table at Kat’s newest question.

“It’s good that you two have stayed such close friends then,” Kat continued, unaware of the conversation she was bestowing on everyone.

“You get really close to someone when you tour with them on and off for almost eight years,” Frank threw in, watching Gerard to see his reaction.

“And they lived together too, when they were seeing each other,” Jack shot in; clearly wanting to be apart of the grown ups conversation.

Over the other side of the table Alicia chocked on her drink slightly as Frank felt Kat’s hand slip away from his lap slightly. Jess’ hand didn’t move though and when he turned to look at her she had a big smile on her face as though the thought of Frank and Gerard living together was even more of a turn on then anything else he had done so far.

“In a musical sense,” Mikey quickly put into the conversation. Frank didn't even know what that meant, but Kat seemed to think she was meant to understand so she simply nodded her head in mock understanding.

Jack scrunched up his face in confusion and opened his mouth to say something else but Mikey quickly covered it with his hand causing Jack’s words to come out so muffled that they couldn’t be deciphered.

As the lunch progressed, Jess finally left to meet up with her boyfriend, making sure she brushed her hand against Frank’s highly sensitive crotch causing him to cry out again in surprise, before getting up and leaving the table. With her gone the rest of the meal passed on without too many more disruptions. When everyone finally started to get up and leave for more drinks by the pool outside, Frank grabbed another beer and distanced himself from the group.

When Jack was sent up to bed by a still rather bitter Lindsey, Frank decided to follow him up rather then stay with the ever flirtatious Kat. The moment he stepped into the six year olds room he felt ill.

“Jack, no, no, no! This,” he pointed to the poster behind Jack’s bed of the movie from hell, ‘Love is all you need’. “Please, you have got to take this down. Why would you want something like that on your wall anyway?”

Jack pulled on his pajamas and jumped onto his bed, grabbing Franks arm and forcing him to sit down with him.

“I like it because you made it Frankie,” Jack stated, still holding onto Frank’s hand possessively.

“This isn’t me Jack, this isn’t my movie. Some ass - I mean - some jerk took my music and changed all the meanings behind my words. This movie isn’t what my album was supposed to be about.”

“Well, what was it supposed to be about then?”

Frank inspected Jack closely. Sometimes he wished he was younger again, just so he couldn’t ask so many questions.

“Honestly? You ... and your dad.”

It was the simplest way Frank could put it. He couldn’t explain to Jack that it was actually about the heart crippling loneliness, self loathing and the pain and suffering he felt when they were gone. How would that sound?

“Frankie ... why can’t everyone just get along?” Jack asked, perhaps sensing that Frank didn’t want to talk about the movie anymore. “Why do you all have to fight all the time?”

“Because your mum drives me crazy, that’s why,” Frank replied, before grabbing Jack and tickling him until he was crying into the sheets from laughter.

“Stop, stop,” he pleaded, still giggling as Frank finally ceased the attack. “That’s not fair! You know I’m ticklish.”

“That’s why I do it! Now, bed. Come on, get under the covers and I’ll tuck you in,” Frank instructed. It wasn’t often he took charge of Jack like that, but sometimes it felt good almost made him feel like some kind of adult.

“Which songs did you write about daddy?”

Frank sighed as he ran a hand through his hair. He definitely did not want to dive into this conversation tonight.

“Come on Jack, it’s time for bed, no more questions.”

“But Frankie you seem so sad,” Jack said, wrestling with the blankets that Frank was now trying to force him under. He stopped at Jack’s words, giving up trying to get him to sleep. Instead he just rested his head down onto Jack’s pillow, right next to the boy’s soft dark hair.

Jack’s big brown eyes just bore into him, as though trying to find out everything about him. It unsettled Frank slightly, only because Gerard used to stare at him with that exact same look and with those exact same eyes in that almost exact same face.

“Jack, did you, you know ... did you like it when Gerard and I were together? I mean, you had fun right?” Frank asked, voicing some of his own insecurities on the six year old. It was so much easier to open up to a child.

“I loved it Frankie! Not everyone can say they have two dads. It was always fun.”

Frank swallowed hard at Jack’s words. Never had he even thought of himself as a father figure to the kid. Sure, he had been in Jack’s life since the moment he was born, but he just never thought he saw him as some sort of second dad.

“But ... I did miss you Frankie,” Jack suddenly said, breaking the eye contact as he stared at his sheets as though he was saying something wrong.

“I know buddy, I missed you two.”

Jack looked back up again, shaking his head slightly.

“No, I mean, I missed you before. You were always away; you would only come home for a day or two and then go away again. Daddy was always so upset. I think he got lonely when I was with mum and you were gone all the time.”

Frank cleared his throat and blinked furiously a few times. He wasn’t going to cry, hell, what sort of a fucking wimp would he be then? Frank Iero didn’t cry. But the words were enough to make him suddenly feel like everything Gerard had done to him when they had been ‘together’ was slightly justified. He knew Gerard, he knew how he hated to be alone, yet he continued to tour, he continued to play at clubs and pubs every other night. Bottom line, Frank was never there!

“But you’ve got to be happier now right Jack? I mean you get your mum and dad, all the time. When you had me and Gerard, your parents weren’t together, it would have sucked.”

“Yeah, but I still got to see mum all the time back then. Now that they’re together again, I don’t get to see you as much as I used to. Why can’t you come and live with us?”

“Man, that’s a huge question Jack and I’m sorry I can’t answer it for you. But I’m alright; I’ve got a new job now. I’m playing, I’m happy and I promise I’ll come hang out with you more. Okay?”

Jack just nodded again as Frank sat up, flattened his hair and jumped off the small bed. As promised, he pulled up Jack’s sheets and kissed him on the forehead.

“Sleep tight Jack,” he said, but before he left, he figured he’d better say something fatherly, something that a parent would say. “Um - Jack ... don’t let anymore of the older kids touch you at school alright? Unless of cause it’s a girl. Older girls are good.”

“Okay Frankie,” Jack smiled, rubbing a small fist into his eye and yawning.

“Good boy. Night!”

Frank left the door open a tiny bit, just so Jack could have that small slither of light leak into his room. If he remembered correctly, that was the only way he would ever get to sleep.

“So which room are you staying in?” a female voice asked as Frank made his way down the hall, deep in thought.

Looking around he saw Kat standing in the doorway of one of Gerard and Lindsey’s spare bedrooms. She was skimpily dressed in tiny sleeping shorts and a tight fitted singlet top. Frank looked her up and down and then took a deep breath and shook his head.

“Not staying I’m afraid, got to get home,” he said, wondering how the hell he had gotten so soft lately. Kat looked beyond disappointed but Frank knew it was for the best, his head was still so filled with guilt over the way he had treated Gerard when they had been together that he didn’t even think twice about declining her invitation.

"Oh you're no fun at all," she whined, disappearing into her room for a moment. When she came back out, she moved in closer to Frank and immediately pressed her lips into his, kissing him with such fury she knocked him slightly off balance.

Her hand played around with his for a while until she finally broke away. Turning around, she wondered back into the room. It was clear she was hoping he'd follow, but Frank just didn't have it in him anymore. However, he looked down at the hand she had been touching and noticed a folded piece of paper between his fingers; he didn't need to unfold it to know that it was her phone number.

"Too easy," he muttered proudly as he walked down the hall, whistling to himself.

--------------------------------

Gerard didn't get to see his brother as often as he used to anymore. That was probably the one thing he despised the most about not being in My Chemical Romance now. He loved his brother, they were best friends and he missed the way they used to talk all the time. It was nights like this that made him feel more at ease with the world, mainly for the simple reason that his brother was there with him.

"You did good with Frank," Gerard told Mikey as he leant back into his chair, staring at the dark liquid in his pool.

"Yeah well, I figured he needed some sort of escape. I tell you Gee, it kills me to see him like this sometimes. I miss the old Frank, the one that used to slash Bob's head open and kick you in the balls," Mikey said, staring at his beer thoughtfully.

"We've all grown up a lot since then Mikes, I don't think any of us would be able to tolerate his shit anymore, it's probably better that he's calmed down a bit."

Mikey stopped staring at his beer and looked up to stare into his brothers eyes. It was clear he was quite surprised by this statement.

"And I think I miss the old Gerard a lot to. You've definitely changed."

There was some form of bitterness in Mikey's voice, but enough to have Gerard worried, it was more that longing his brother had for things to be back to the way they used to be. Being older, Gerard knew better then to dwell on the past.

"I've got a kid Mikey, that sort of thing is supposed to change you."

With those words silence fell over them again. It wasn't awkward, it was quite pleasant. Lindsey and Alicia's laughter could be heard from back inside the house and it was just enough to make Gerard feel remotely content. There was still this nagging feeling in his chest though; the one that never went away, something that told him all of what he had was one big fat lie.

"You know Gee, I think it's really good that you still keep in contact with Frank," Mikey said, finally breaking the silence.

"Jack likes him," he stated simply.

"True. But look Gee ... Just - you have thought about this haven't you? I mean, you've seriously thought about re-marrying Lindsey. Long and hard?"

Gerard snapped his head around to stare at his brother in surprise. He couldn't believe they were having this conversation.

"Yes I've thought about it Mikey. Why? What's that supposed to mean anyway?"

"Well, it's just, you left her last time, remember. And let’s not pretend that didn't happen, because it did. You left her and your kid for Frank, and god Gee, you were fucking happy man! I know I hated the idea of you and Frank the first time around, but things were different back then. Now, he's finally settled, he's finally getting his shit together for you. Because we all know, it's all for you. I know you've got Jack to think about and I know you feel guilty as hell for what she went through after you, but please Gerard, just make sure you're doing the right thing this time."

Mikey ended his speech sitting at the very end of his seat, arms flailing around wildly. It would have been quite funny had his words not been so serious.

"I am Mikes; this is the right thing to do."

"I'm not talking about the right thing to do, as in it's expected that it's the right thing to do. I'm talking about the right thing to do for you! I think you need to be selfish now Gee, I think you need to stop and look at your life and seriously think about who you want to be with for the rest of it."

Gerard stared at the dark starry sky and took a deep breath. He loved Lindsey, he really did, but whilst Frank was still around him he could never truly get over him. There was just something about him that Gerard still couldn't shake. He was familiar. He was the past. Frank was Frank.

To him, Frank meant parties. Frank meant live shows and record labels and free beer and hanging out with your friends. He meant freedom, he meant chaos, he meant energy and lust. To Gerard, Frank meant the band. And the band, even though he hated to admit it, was still his life. It was a struggle to live every day without that urge to just hire out some run down van and take off to some dirty club to play a live show.

"Don't ever tell Lindsey Mikes, but Frank was better in bed," Gerard admitted, hoping to get his thoughts away from the band.

"Ew Gee, I don't even want to fucking know how that's possible," Mikey whined, blocking his ears. "As far as I'm concerned all you guys ever did was kiss."

Gerard laughed. The first real laugh in a very long time. Mikey joined in, only stopping to cringe at the images Gerard had no doubt placed in his head. Their laughter died however when they heard another voice interrupt.

"Well, it's been one big fat day of insanity thanks guys, but I'm heading off home to bed I think."

Both brothers turned around to see Frank walking out onto the patio. Gerard was surprised to see his usual tough guy demeanor almost completely washed off his face. Even the eye contact he shot his way was very minimal. That was definitely something new.

"See you man, we'll come to watch you play real soon," Mikey said, signaling Gerard as he spoke.

"Yeah, or even better, maybe you can put family aside for a day or two and take the stage with me," Frank said, running a hand through his hair as though nervous about what he had just said.

"Maybe. Anyways, see ya, I guess," Gerard said, not sure he really knew what to say. Frank's slight personality change had thrown him off completely.

"Night guys."

With that Frank gave a small wave and exited back through the house. Gerard leant back in his chair, the laughter between him and his brother all but forgotten. Not another word was spoken, because Frank's words still bounced around chaotically in-between them.

It was true. There was absolutely nothing stopping them from getting out there and playing again. They could write lyrics, they could create a sound; they could call up Brian and be touring again by tomorrow.

The only thing that was stopping them was themselves.

-------------------------------------------

After saying his goodbyes to everyone, Frank walked towards his car and lit up a cigarette. At that moment another car arrived in the street, idly purring away whilst its occupants said one last goodbye. When the passenger door finally swung open Frank laughed inwardly as Jess stepped up to him and the car drove away.

“Leaving so soon Frank?” she questioned, moving in closer to him, her hands finding his belt and playing around with it lazily.

“Ah, yes. And now more then ever I think,” he said, pulling her hands away from him and stepping back slightly. “This - well, whatever you think this is - it’s sick and it’s wrong. Just a one off thing ... never again.”

Jess’ usual smiling face fell as she to took a step backwards.

“Don’t think you’re so fucking fantastic Frank. I mean, you must be pretty messed up right now. Imagine becoming the employer of a women you so clearly hate.”

Frank froze, not quite understanding her words.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Lindsey, you do know that she is the owner of the record company that’s signing your little band don’t you? Oh you didn’t ... how hard that must be for you.”

Feeling slightly ill, Frank backed away from the teenager until he bumped into his car. Numbly he swung his legs over, falling into the driver’s seat. He didn’t even take a moment to breath; he just turned the key and floored the accelerator. He refused to think about it, he couldn’t, he wouldn’t. It was too much.

Needing some air, he kept on driving until he pulled up at the highest cliff point over looking the beach. The air was menacing around him, blowing so strongly he couldn’t think of anything whilst the noise was so distracting.

“You know Frank, despite the fact that you were an ass-hole. I do still love you,” Gerard’s voice whispered into his ear.

“Maybe so, but I’m starting to feel I don’t deserve that love anymore,” Frank said simply as he turned to face the imaginary image of Gerard, once again, sitting in his passenger seat.

“People change Frank.”

“But sometimes change now is not enough to erase mistakes that happened back then,” he explained sadly.

Gerard smiled at him and Frank felt he could just sit and stare at him like that forever, but at that moment a plane went over, distracting his drifting thoughts.

Gerard vanished and Frank was alone in his car once again.

-----------------------

AN: Please not page breaks, they are there for a reason. Probably because the point of view is changing from Frank to Gerard. It only usually happens once r twice in a chapter, but may happen more.
And it's done. That was epic. Not really once I read over it, but if felt like it was, he he. Let me know what you think, as always, your comments are very well received :)