Categories > Games > Final Fantasy 7 > Seph and Kef: Without a Straightjacket
A Fateful Meeting
0 reviewsWhen Sephiroth meets the obnoxious Kefka and the two start an academy for young villains, chaos ensues! No flames, please!
1Funny
Disclaimer: I do NOT own Final Fantasy 6 or 7. Nor do I own any other characters from TV shows or books that may appear during the running length of this fanfic. I'm just having some insane fun. I mean, we're all a little mad here...Oh, yes. Cloud, Cid, and Vincent will also be appearing, as well as my character and my best friend's character.
Chapter 1: A Fateful Meeting
He waited patiently as the receptionist poured over the waiting list, checking for his name and scheduled appointment. It was taking her a while, but then the list was seven pages long, the poor girl. Absentmindedly, he began playing with one of his long silver bangs. He also wondered how many people would think it strange that a villain like him was waiting in a lobby to see a psychologist.
"Mr...Sephiroth? Dr. Takahashi will see you now. Up in room 713." The girl said slowly, giving him a skeptical look as she said his name. He nodded his thanks, turned on his heel, and stepped into one of the opening elevators. Sephiroth didn't like elevators much, (he had always preferred climbing really, seeing as he had spent all that time in SOLDIER,) but at least this was faster and the sooner he saw this Dr. Kouji Takahashi, the better.
When he reached the seventh floor, the elevator doors opened and he tentatively looked around the hallway before ambling on through it. It was a rather plain hallway, without any pictures or overhead lights. Close to the elevator there was a small nightstand with an even smaller potted plant atop it, but that was the only splash of color among the white hall. It was so bright in fact, it almost made him nauseous. Finally on his right he saw the door with the number 713 and the name plate of Dr. K. Takahashi on it. He opened it slowly and stared in awe for a moment at the room inside. The floor was a lush blue carpet with gray walls all around. There were standing lights in every corner, with the exception of one that was occupied by a large marble sculpture of a gargoyle in flight. In the very middle of the room there were two poofy red reclining chairs and a green armchair for the psychologist. Nobody occupied any of these pieces of furniture, but Sephiroth wasn't alone. The opposite end of the room to him had a window and there was someone staring out of it. He turned at hearing Sephiroth's footsteps and simultaneously they asked, "Dr. Takahashi?"
This made it apparent that neither of them were the doctor or knew what he looked like.
"My apologies." the other said, dipping into an elegant bow. Sephiroth's eyes widened as he took in this man. His face was chalk-white with strange, curving red marks around his blue eyes. His blonde hair was pulled into a high-set ponytail with bright purple feathers tucked into it; He had a flowing green cape attatched to his high, fanned, red-and-yellow collar. His shirt was a royal blue, which seemed sane enough but his pants...well...one was neon green with a blue cresent pattern, the other black with a yellow star pattern. They were tucked in abruptly at the knees where Sephiroth could see tights as white as the man's make-up covering his shins and finally ending in a pair of Chinese slippers.
Sephiroth swallowed. If life were a game of Uno, this guy would without a doubt be the wild card.
"Ahem! It's very rude to stare!" the man said sharply, snapping him out of his daydreaming.
"Oh. I'm sorry. I didn't realize. Forgive my manners." he stuttered, attempting to be as polite as he was able for being half-embarrassed and half-intrigued. His company turned back to the window, appearing to be highly offended.
"I suppose our appointments were both scheduled at the same time by accident." he grabbed at straws, hoping to engage the blonde man in conversation so as to forget his rudeness. He wasn't much of a people person, having been a general of SOLDIER.
"So it would seem." came the cool reply. Ok, maybe he should just give up. He sighed silently and sat on one of the poofy chairs, proceeding to study the gargoyle sculpture for lack of nothing better to do to occupy his time.
"What is your name?" the blonde man asked at length.
"Sephiroth." he replied without hesitation. He looked up to meet those blue eyes and lock with them in fascination.
"Ahh. He who was nearly a god. Hmm..."
"And may I have your name, since we apparently seem to be on friendly terms now?"
The man smiled at him widely; too widely.
"Kefka Palazzo. At your service, I'm sure." he answered, sounding a tad too amused. A lightbulb in Sephiroth's head turned on. He heard something once about a man dressed like nobility with that same name. That man, had in fact, been something of a god himself. Could this Kefka be the same as the other one?
The way this fascinating conversation was carrying on, almost neither of them realized that the door's deadbolt lock was slowly turning to meet it's latch. It clicked when it hit the latch, catching Kefka's attention. Jerking his head toward the door, the smile fell off his pale face and his eyebrows narrowed into a frown as he began to glance around the room. Suddenly Sephiroth sensed it to and he leapt to his feet, unsheathing his sword.
"A trap..." Kefka muttered to himself. Sephiroth paid no attention. He was waiting for a clue, a giveaway. The noise of heavyset boots came pounding from the direction of the stairs that had been around the corner of the end of the hall. There was some faint shouting, like a leader giving orders, and he thought he heard some machine guns being loaded as well.
"So. It seems we're wanted. Let's hope the fools are ready for death." he hissed, only half-addressing Kefka, who on the other hand, seemed to have quite a different idea in mind. His body seemed to waver, then became transparent, and finally disappeared entirely. Sephiroth rolled his eyes and gave a snort, and charged headlong at the door. It was hand-carved mahogony and extremely solid, but the SOLDIER general's shoulder had broken down more doors in the past eight years than The Price Is Right had given out new cars. The wood splintered, gave way, and he was through, running at breakneck speed for the elevators. Hearing running footsteps behind him, he stole a quick glance. Three cops were gaining on him, two with machine guns in hand, the other attempting to load his gernade launcher while moving. Uttering a stream of swear words, Sephiroth turned back and slammed his fist against the elevator down button. The doors opened and he flung himself inside and kicked his right leg out. It connected with the "G" button and the doors closed, beginning the descent. Sephiroth knew he couldn't let his guard down but he was safely enclosed so he spared himself a few moments to breathe. Once the doors opened, he rushed into the lobby only to be greeted by a whole squad of the boys in blue, circling him on all sides.
"Shit." he muttered, searching for an opening somewhere. He didn't find one. These men had to be well-seasoned to organize like this. One of them stepped forward, an automatic pistol in his left hand.
"Now, now Mr. Sephiroth. We know this may be hard for you to grasp, but we need you to come with us." he said slowly, enunciating every syllable.
Who did this idiot think he was talking to, a child?
"I doubt you really want me to. Besides, I have other business to attend to, so if you'll excuse me..." he answered calmly, though he set his masamune for an overhead parry.
"It is against my orders to do so. Now surrender." the officer snapped, his patience wearing thin.
"In pieces." Sephiroth spat. Then several things happened at once: Sephiroth dropped into a crouch, the police squad aimed at him, a woman screamed, and a huge jeep came crashing into the hall, slamming into the wall with the elevator doors. In the confusion, the cops scattered, a few shot each other on accident, and Sephiroth saw a purple feather fluttering around inside the jeep. He jumped, flipping over one of the downed officers, opened the passenger door of the vehicle, and slammedit shut once he was inside.
"Miss me?" Kefka asked, grinning insanely.
"Don't ever do that to me again, idiot." was the hiss of answer he got. Kefka looked out of the windshield at the closed lobby doors and recovering policemen. He snickered and threw his foot down on the gas pedal. Sephiroth's eyes widened.
"What the hell are you doing?"
"Hee hee hee! Driving, of course!"
Five seconds later they burst into the parking lot, sending wood and glass flying everywhere. One exceptionally large chunk of the doorframe lodged itself in the windshield and Kefka put on the brakes. Sephiroth drew his breath in sharply and pushed on the piece of wood, sending off onto their hood and falling to the ground.
"Once again, I broke a worthless object." Kefka seemed to be admiring his handiwork.
"DON'T LOOK SO PLEASED WITH YOURSELF, YOU MANIAC!" Sephiroth yelled, furious with his new companion. Kefka chuckled.
"Don't you see? We're free now." he murmured and began to drive again. Sephiroth didn't object, but he didn't say anything either. They drove in silence for a long time, weaving a path between back roads and the highway so as to keep any other police units off their trail. It wasn't until they got on a highway and stayed on that either one of them said anything to each other.
"I can see us working together, you know." Kefka said very quietly.
"On what?" Sephiroth's venom wasn't fading as quickly as he would have liked it to.
"An acadamy. A villian's acadamy. A place where we can pass on our knowledge, our skills, our wisdom to a younger generation of evildoers." came the quiet answer. Sephiroth took a moment to consider it.
"What do you think?" Kefka asked. Sephiroth twirled his bangs again. He did this every now and then when he was carefully considering something.
"If I'm working with you, I call 60." he said.
"50."
"60!"
"50, no more, no less. It proves that we are equals. There will be no greater than the other crap." Kefka snapped.
"Fine. I'll take half." Sephiroth sighed.
"HA! Done!" Kefka laughed and stuck a tape in the Jeep's cassette player. Queen blasted through the speakers, and before Sephiroth could even utter a groan, Kefka began to sing and dance in beat to "Another One Bites the Dust." Sephiroth smacked his hands into his face and nearly screamed.
"I'm being punished, aren't I?" he muttered, causing Kefka to cackle and accelerate on the gas.
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LBM: So how did you guys like it? Don't worry, it'll get more fun as it goes on. And more insane, of course.
Chapter 1: A Fateful Meeting
He waited patiently as the receptionist poured over the waiting list, checking for his name and scheduled appointment. It was taking her a while, but then the list was seven pages long, the poor girl. Absentmindedly, he began playing with one of his long silver bangs. He also wondered how many people would think it strange that a villain like him was waiting in a lobby to see a psychologist.
"Mr...Sephiroth? Dr. Takahashi will see you now. Up in room 713." The girl said slowly, giving him a skeptical look as she said his name. He nodded his thanks, turned on his heel, and stepped into one of the opening elevators. Sephiroth didn't like elevators much, (he had always preferred climbing really, seeing as he had spent all that time in SOLDIER,) but at least this was faster and the sooner he saw this Dr. Kouji Takahashi, the better.
When he reached the seventh floor, the elevator doors opened and he tentatively looked around the hallway before ambling on through it. It was a rather plain hallway, without any pictures or overhead lights. Close to the elevator there was a small nightstand with an even smaller potted plant atop it, but that was the only splash of color among the white hall. It was so bright in fact, it almost made him nauseous. Finally on his right he saw the door with the number 713 and the name plate of Dr. K. Takahashi on it. He opened it slowly and stared in awe for a moment at the room inside. The floor was a lush blue carpet with gray walls all around. There were standing lights in every corner, with the exception of one that was occupied by a large marble sculpture of a gargoyle in flight. In the very middle of the room there were two poofy red reclining chairs and a green armchair for the psychologist. Nobody occupied any of these pieces of furniture, but Sephiroth wasn't alone. The opposite end of the room to him had a window and there was someone staring out of it. He turned at hearing Sephiroth's footsteps and simultaneously they asked, "Dr. Takahashi?"
This made it apparent that neither of them were the doctor or knew what he looked like.
"My apologies." the other said, dipping into an elegant bow. Sephiroth's eyes widened as he took in this man. His face was chalk-white with strange, curving red marks around his blue eyes. His blonde hair was pulled into a high-set ponytail with bright purple feathers tucked into it; He had a flowing green cape attatched to his high, fanned, red-and-yellow collar. His shirt was a royal blue, which seemed sane enough but his pants...well...one was neon green with a blue cresent pattern, the other black with a yellow star pattern. They were tucked in abruptly at the knees where Sephiroth could see tights as white as the man's make-up covering his shins and finally ending in a pair of Chinese slippers.
Sephiroth swallowed. If life were a game of Uno, this guy would without a doubt be the wild card.
"Ahem! It's very rude to stare!" the man said sharply, snapping him out of his daydreaming.
"Oh. I'm sorry. I didn't realize. Forgive my manners." he stuttered, attempting to be as polite as he was able for being half-embarrassed and half-intrigued. His company turned back to the window, appearing to be highly offended.
"I suppose our appointments were both scheduled at the same time by accident." he grabbed at straws, hoping to engage the blonde man in conversation so as to forget his rudeness. He wasn't much of a people person, having been a general of SOLDIER.
"So it would seem." came the cool reply. Ok, maybe he should just give up. He sighed silently and sat on one of the poofy chairs, proceeding to study the gargoyle sculpture for lack of nothing better to do to occupy his time.
"What is your name?" the blonde man asked at length.
"Sephiroth." he replied without hesitation. He looked up to meet those blue eyes and lock with them in fascination.
"Ahh. He who was nearly a god. Hmm..."
"And may I have your name, since we apparently seem to be on friendly terms now?"
The man smiled at him widely; too widely.
"Kefka Palazzo. At your service, I'm sure." he answered, sounding a tad too amused. A lightbulb in Sephiroth's head turned on. He heard something once about a man dressed like nobility with that same name. That man, had in fact, been something of a god himself. Could this Kefka be the same as the other one?
The way this fascinating conversation was carrying on, almost neither of them realized that the door's deadbolt lock was slowly turning to meet it's latch. It clicked when it hit the latch, catching Kefka's attention. Jerking his head toward the door, the smile fell off his pale face and his eyebrows narrowed into a frown as he began to glance around the room. Suddenly Sephiroth sensed it to and he leapt to his feet, unsheathing his sword.
"A trap..." Kefka muttered to himself. Sephiroth paid no attention. He was waiting for a clue, a giveaway. The noise of heavyset boots came pounding from the direction of the stairs that had been around the corner of the end of the hall. There was some faint shouting, like a leader giving orders, and he thought he heard some machine guns being loaded as well.
"So. It seems we're wanted. Let's hope the fools are ready for death." he hissed, only half-addressing Kefka, who on the other hand, seemed to have quite a different idea in mind. His body seemed to waver, then became transparent, and finally disappeared entirely. Sephiroth rolled his eyes and gave a snort, and charged headlong at the door. It was hand-carved mahogony and extremely solid, but the SOLDIER general's shoulder had broken down more doors in the past eight years than The Price Is Right had given out new cars. The wood splintered, gave way, and he was through, running at breakneck speed for the elevators. Hearing running footsteps behind him, he stole a quick glance. Three cops were gaining on him, two with machine guns in hand, the other attempting to load his gernade launcher while moving. Uttering a stream of swear words, Sephiroth turned back and slammed his fist against the elevator down button. The doors opened and he flung himself inside and kicked his right leg out. It connected with the "G" button and the doors closed, beginning the descent. Sephiroth knew he couldn't let his guard down but he was safely enclosed so he spared himself a few moments to breathe. Once the doors opened, he rushed into the lobby only to be greeted by a whole squad of the boys in blue, circling him on all sides.
"Shit." he muttered, searching for an opening somewhere. He didn't find one. These men had to be well-seasoned to organize like this. One of them stepped forward, an automatic pistol in his left hand.
"Now, now Mr. Sephiroth. We know this may be hard for you to grasp, but we need you to come with us." he said slowly, enunciating every syllable.
Who did this idiot think he was talking to, a child?
"I doubt you really want me to. Besides, I have other business to attend to, so if you'll excuse me..." he answered calmly, though he set his masamune for an overhead parry.
"It is against my orders to do so. Now surrender." the officer snapped, his patience wearing thin.
"In pieces." Sephiroth spat. Then several things happened at once: Sephiroth dropped into a crouch, the police squad aimed at him, a woman screamed, and a huge jeep came crashing into the hall, slamming into the wall with the elevator doors. In the confusion, the cops scattered, a few shot each other on accident, and Sephiroth saw a purple feather fluttering around inside the jeep. He jumped, flipping over one of the downed officers, opened the passenger door of the vehicle, and slammedit shut once he was inside.
"Miss me?" Kefka asked, grinning insanely.
"Don't ever do that to me again, idiot." was the hiss of answer he got. Kefka looked out of the windshield at the closed lobby doors and recovering policemen. He snickered and threw his foot down on the gas pedal. Sephiroth's eyes widened.
"What the hell are you doing?"
"Hee hee hee! Driving, of course!"
Five seconds later they burst into the parking lot, sending wood and glass flying everywhere. One exceptionally large chunk of the doorframe lodged itself in the windshield and Kefka put on the brakes. Sephiroth drew his breath in sharply and pushed on the piece of wood, sending off onto their hood and falling to the ground.
"Once again, I broke a worthless object." Kefka seemed to be admiring his handiwork.
"DON'T LOOK SO PLEASED WITH YOURSELF, YOU MANIAC!" Sephiroth yelled, furious with his new companion. Kefka chuckled.
"Don't you see? We're free now." he murmured and began to drive again. Sephiroth didn't object, but he didn't say anything either. They drove in silence for a long time, weaving a path between back roads and the highway so as to keep any other police units off their trail. It wasn't until they got on a highway and stayed on that either one of them said anything to each other.
"I can see us working together, you know." Kefka said very quietly.
"On what?" Sephiroth's venom wasn't fading as quickly as he would have liked it to.
"An acadamy. A villian's acadamy. A place where we can pass on our knowledge, our skills, our wisdom to a younger generation of evildoers." came the quiet answer. Sephiroth took a moment to consider it.
"What do you think?" Kefka asked. Sephiroth twirled his bangs again. He did this every now and then when he was carefully considering something.
"If I'm working with you, I call 60." he said.
"50."
"60!"
"50, no more, no less. It proves that we are equals. There will be no greater than the other crap." Kefka snapped.
"Fine. I'll take half." Sephiroth sighed.
"HA! Done!" Kefka laughed and stuck a tape in the Jeep's cassette player. Queen blasted through the speakers, and before Sephiroth could even utter a groan, Kefka began to sing and dance in beat to "Another One Bites the Dust." Sephiroth smacked his hands into his face and nearly screamed.
"I'm being punished, aren't I?" he muttered, causing Kefka to cackle and accelerate on the gas.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
LBM: So how did you guys like it? Don't worry, it'll get more fun as it goes on. And more insane, of course.
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