Categories > Celebrities > Fall Out Boy > Assisted Revenge
Ch. 14: Happy Holidays, You Bastards
2 reviewsA Christmas full of pranks and revenge with the two rival bands.
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Ch. 14 Happy Holidays, You Bastard
(Before I start, let me say this: I originally was going to try and write 12 mini chapters and one intro. You know, like the twelve days of Christmas? Well, I only got to writing six of them. So here is the first two combined. And to fill you in on what you miss without the intro, a bunch of their friends are coming in for a few days before Christmas. That would explain the presence of Gabe Saporta, Pete Wentz, and Alex Gaskarth in this chapter. I won’t give out a list of bands that are there, since most of them aren’t in these two chapters. You may continue ^^)
Part 1: Happy Holidays you Bastards.
Alicia POV
It was the morning after everyone had come in and I was so fricking tired. We’d stayed up till 5 AM with our stories. I looked at the clock. 11 AM. Damn.
I walked over to where Pete and some others (insomniacs) sat. A package in the middle.
“What’s up?” I said groggily.
“Package for you.”
“Who from?”
”Look for yourself.” He handed me the package. I took it and looked at the tag. I was definitely surprised.
Liz.
To the rest of Assisted Revenge and me.
Coincidentally, the rest of the band, except Keith came downstairs.
“Guess what?” I said.
“Mmm?” They responded, the lack of sleep showing.
“We got a package from Liz.”
”Whaa?” They grabbed the package, now alert.
“Do you guys want to wait for Keith or open it now?”
”NOW!”
We tore the package apart to reveal a box of cookies.
“What. The. Hell?” Shane said.
“You spoke my mind.” I muttered.
“They’re probably poisoned.” Brandon said.
Britt opened the box and sniffed them. She quickly jerked away.
“Definitely tainted.” She said in disgust.
I rolled my eyes and through the box on the couch.
*
Later, Keith walked up to us. He was clutching his stomach. His face was positively green.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” Alex Gaskarth asked.
“Uhhh…cookies…” He replied in a weak, sick voice.
“Oh, crap.” I got up suddenly, “You did not eat the cookies on the couch.
“…I did…” he moaned. I fought the urge to hit him in the head.
“You tard!” I yelled, “Those were from Liz!”
”They were spoiled!” Britt joined in.
“Uhh,” And something vile came from his mouth. Not words, but a substance. Right in front of Britt and me.
“Oh they are so screwed.” I vowed vengeance.
“Someone’s doomed.” Gabe said.
“And I’ve got a plan.” Brandon said, Shane and him sharing a smile.
The war had begun.
Part 2: Merry Itchmas
Alicia POV
We shipped off the package with a smile, admiring our handiwork.
“Well done,” I grinned, “Let’s see them take that.”
Liz POV
I was cheerful. Assisted Revenge received our death package, and from what I heard, Keith was puking buckets.
I had called them last night to say, “Merry Christmas, bitches.”
Fortunately, it was Keith who answered. I laughed at his weak voice and the people yelling at him in the background.
I walked down the stairs with a hop in my step.
“What the hell’s wrong with you?” our guitarist, and my twin, James, asked.
“Just happy that we got those Assisted Revenge freaks.”
“Just as long as you’re not on drugs.” Claire, our bassist, said, “Actually, we’ve been waiting for you.” She slid a package across the table. From Alicia. I opened it.
“Enhancement cream and moisturizer,” I said, “How clever.”
“Look at what’s attached to the Enhancement crap.” Claire said.
“’You’ll be needing this ;)’” I read aloud, “Bitch.”
“Do you reckon that it’s rigged?” Rick the Dick(rhythm guitar) asked.
“I think it’s safe to use,” Kevin, our drummer, answered, “I think it was just supposed to be an insult.”
”Awesome.” James and Rick said, grabbing their share of the load. Kevin, Claire, and I took stuff, too.
**
The next day, Kevin, Rick, and James walked downstairs awkwardly and carefully. Slowest I’ve ever seen the sugar snorters.
“What’s wrong with you?” I asked.
”Damn…itchy…” Kevin groaned.
“You too?” Claire scratched her chest.
“Yeah, I think that crap was rigged.” I said, itching as well.
“DAMN!” they yelled. The phone rang.
Alicia POV
“Merry Christmas, bitches. Check and mate.” I said and then hung up the phone.
...
Hey. Just writing a little note. That huge ass chapter? Yeah, its done. But its 60 fucking pages. So I need to type that out. My friend Liz has taken over Save Your Regrets. She has developed them beyond my imagination. I wuvz her. She joined in our big chapter and kidnapped a character. I have some other stuff for before I start the big one, so I'll work on that. Till then, read, stay in school, and dream!
(Before I start, let me say this: I originally was going to try and write 12 mini chapters and one intro. You know, like the twelve days of Christmas? Well, I only got to writing six of them. So here is the first two combined. And to fill you in on what you miss without the intro, a bunch of their friends are coming in for a few days before Christmas. That would explain the presence of Gabe Saporta, Pete Wentz, and Alex Gaskarth in this chapter. I won’t give out a list of bands that are there, since most of them aren’t in these two chapters. You may continue ^^)
Part 1: Happy Holidays you Bastards.
Alicia POV
It was the morning after everyone had come in and I was so fricking tired. We’d stayed up till 5 AM with our stories. I looked at the clock. 11 AM. Damn.
I walked over to where Pete and some others (insomniacs) sat. A package in the middle.
“What’s up?” I said groggily.
“Package for you.”
“Who from?”
”Look for yourself.” He handed me the package. I took it and looked at the tag. I was definitely surprised.
Liz.
To the rest of Assisted Revenge and me.
Coincidentally, the rest of the band, except Keith came downstairs.
“Guess what?” I said.
“Mmm?” They responded, the lack of sleep showing.
“We got a package from Liz.”
”Whaa?” They grabbed the package, now alert.
“Do you guys want to wait for Keith or open it now?”
”NOW!”
We tore the package apart to reveal a box of cookies.
“What. The. Hell?” Shane said.
“You spoke my mind.” I muttered.
“They’re probably poisoned.” Brandon said.
Britt opened the box and sniffed them. She quickly jerked away.
“Definitely tainted.” She said in disgust.
I rolled my eyes and through the box on the couch.
*
Later, Keith walked up to us. He was clutching his stomach. His face was positively green.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” Alex Gaskarth asked.
“Uhhh…cookies…” He replied in a weak, sick voice.
“Oh, crap.” I got up suddenly, “You did not eat the cookies on the couch.
“…I did…” he moaned. I fought the urge to hit him in the head.
“You tard!” I yelled, “Those were from Liz!”
”They were spoiled!” Britt joined in.
“Uhh,” And something vile came from his mouth. Not words, but a substance. Right in front of Britt and me.
“Oh they are so screwed.” I vowed vengeance.
“Someone’s doomed.” Gabe said.
“And I’ve got a plan.” Brandon said, Shane and him sharing a smile.
The war had begun.
Part 2: Merry Itchmas
Alicia POV
We shipped off the package with a smile, admiring our handiwork.
“Well done,” I grinned, “Let’s see them take that.”
Liz POV
I was cheerful. Assisted Revenge received our death package, and from what I heard, Keith was puking buckets.
I had called them last night to say, “Merry Christmas, bitches.”
Fortunately, it was Keith who answered. I laughed at his weak voice and the people yelling at him in the background.
I walked down the stairs with a hop in my step.
“What the hell’s wrong with you?” our guitarist, and my twin, James, asked.
“Just happy that we got those Assisted Revenge freaks.”
“Just as long as you’re not on drugs.” Claire, our bassist, said, “Actually, we’ve been waiting for you.” She slid a package across the table. From Alicia. I opened it.
“Enhancement cream and moisturizer,” I said, “How clever.”
“Look at what’s attached to the Enhancement crap.” Claire said.
“’You’ll be needing this ;)’” I read aloud, “Bitch.”
“Do you reckon that it’s rigged?” Rick the Dick(rhythm guitar) asked.
“I think it’s safe to use,” Kevin, our drummer, answered, “I think it was just supposed to be an insult.”
”Awesome.” James and Rick said, grabbing their share of the load. Kevin, Claire, and I took stuff, too.
**
The next day, Kevin, Rick, and James walked downstairs awkwardly and carefully. Slowest I’ve ever seen the sugar snorters.
“What’s wrong with you?” I asked.
”Damn…itchy…” Kevin groaned.
“You too?” Claire scratched her chest.
“Yeah, I think that crap was rigged.” I said, itching as well.
“DAMN!” they yelled. The phone rang.
Alicia POV
“Merry Christmas, bitches. Check and mate.” I said and then hung up the phone.
...
Hey. Just writing a little note. That huge ass chapter? Yeah, its done. But its 60 fucking pages. So I need to type that out. My friend Liz has taken over Save Your Regrets. She has developed them beyond my imagination. I wuvz her. She joined in our big chapter and kidnapped a character. I have some other stuff for before I start the big one, so I'll work on that. Till then, read, stay in school, and dream!
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