FicWad

So in two days I'm going up to the beach and won't be able to update. So I'm going to try and post as many chapters as possible. As soon as I get back, I will be on to to give you more.

10.

So perfect can never last long. My mother decided she had to ruin it. We were nearly at the checkout when we ran into Nina and her mom. I stood there and smiled and nodded at the conversation not really paying attention until I heard my name being mentioned. "Do you know Frank has been dying to see that movie as well Nina, maybe you two should go together?" Don't worry Frank, that was just a hallucination, your mother did not just organize a date for you. "It could be your first date." The sight of Nina made me gag. She was giggling with her mother telling her to be quiet. "What do you think Frank?" My mother asked with bright eyes. No way in hell am I going on a date with Nina. "Sounds great."

"Then the teacher started yelling at me, like it was my fault I tripped and spilt paint all over Jason." Gerard is either very good at lying, or he's actually managed to convince himself that what he did wasn't on purpose. I was too drained to giggle with everyone at Gerard, I hadn't slept a wink last night. Tonight was the 'date'. We were all sitting in the grass at school, it was lunch time. "Frankie what's wrong?" A very concerned looking Gerard came and sat in my lap facing me. "I'm going on a date with Nina tonight." I was waiting for Gerard to start laughing and picking on me. But he sat staring at me with his head tilted, almost as if he didn't understand what I just said. "Why? You don't even like her." Mikey broke the silence. "I know, if only she could get that through her head." Nina must be delusional if she thinks that I really like her. "What are you going to do?" Mikey asked. "I don't know, probably just go." I couldn't think of anyway out. Finally it seemed Gerard was alive again. He shifted himself off my lap and walked back into the school building. "Mikey, where's he going?" I asked, Gerard never just walked off, maybe run off chasing an ice cream truck but that's about it. Mikey turned his gaze to the retreating back of his brother. "His going so he can be alone." He said simply. "Why?" I asked completely confused. "So he can calm down and work out his mind." I didn't ask Mikey anymore questions, it didn't seem like he wanted to tell me anymore either.

I didn't see Gerard once for the rest of the day. I walked home along side Mikey warily, I felt uncomfortable, I had never seen Gerard act like this. I didn't like it. To me Gerard was very easy to read, but at the moment, he had closed the pages. I hanged with Mikey at his house for a little while before I had to get ready for Nina, hoping Gerard would show up. He never did. Walking home by myself, only stopping when I spotted a familiar figure in the park. Gerard was sitting on the swing, his feet pushing himself back and forward slightly. I approached him quietly, studying the unreadable expression he had on his face. "Gee?" I questioned gently, not wanting to disturb the silence. He looked up at me, he stared at my face for a while. "Frank what are you doing?" This was not what I expected him to say. "I don't, I saw you and I thought I should see if you were okay." I said looking everywhere but at him. He shook his head in disbelief. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to disturb you or anything." I hope his not angry. "Frank, go away." Go away? Did Gerard just tell me to go away? But, I, I don't even know. "Gee?" I whispered. He didn't look at me, he just went back to staring in the distance. I quickly turned and walked away, my eyes brimming with tears that I would not let fall.

The date was horrible. Nina kept asking me what was wrong. I ended up telling her that I didn't feel very well. But that just led to her trying to baby me. I had no idea what was going on. Gerard told me to go away. Gerard never tells me to go away. He always wants me next to him. What did I do? Thinking about it just made me want to break down so I concentrated on sipping the milkshake I had bought Nina and I.

The next day I stayed in bed telling my mom I was sick. I don't fake being sick so she didn't question me once. When my mom and dad finally left for work I got up. Hopping into the shower thinking about Gerard. I'm pretty sure I let some tears slip, but I convinced myself that it was just the running water, no tears. I lied down again when I heard the sound of someone stomping up the stairs. I was going to grab my guitar and get ready to hit the intruder. But before I could even turn my head in the direction of where it sat, they were already in my room. I calmed down a little when I saw it was Gerard, and then started panicking again when I remembered our last conversation or lack there of. "Frank get out of bed." He commanded. I stood up so quickly I felt light headed. Gerard watched me sway a little then rolled his eyes. "Gerard I, um, am a little sick." He sniggered. "You're lying." I looked down feeling embarrassed. "No I'm not." I managed weakly. "Frank shut the fuck up and get dressed." He's mad, why's he mad? I wasn't the one who told the other to go away. "I, but..." He cut me off. "I don't care come on." But I didn't want to. "What's wrong Frank? Just do what your told." I don't want to do what I'm told. "Run along little Frank, I'm waiting. I hope you weren't like this on your date. Disobeying orders. Come on Frank do what your told." No. "Hurry up Frank, be a good boy. Go do what your told." I don't want to. "Frannnk." "I don't want to do what I'm fucking told." I yelled at him. "Why should I do what I'm told? I'm not a puppet. I can make my own choices. I will get out of bed when I want, go out with who I want and I will be whoever I want!" I screamed.

I was panting hard. The last part I said had nothing to do with Gerard I was just so angry about...everything. I looked at Gerard, he was smiling gently at me. "What are you smiling at?" I asked pathetically. "I got you to say no, that's what I'm smiling about." He answered. "What?" He smiled even more. "I wanted you to say no, and you did. Even got you to swear too." I felt like screaming again. "So you just got me all angry on purpose?" I was going to burst all over again. "Yes." He said simply. "Why?" I asked quietly. "Because, I don't want you to go through the rest of your life pleasing people. If you act like a door mat Frank, people are going to treat you like one. They're gonna step all over you. You can't even tell a girl that your not interested. You don't watch movies you want because of your parents. YOu probably can't even name the last time you did something for yourself and for yourself only. You're not going to survive if you spend the rest of your life accepting everything. Sometimes you have to fight for what you want" He said sadly. I looked at him for a while, I wanted to be angry with him. I wanted to tell him to fuck off. But he was right. I never argued, I just let others tell me what I wanted and I would agree. It sounded so ridiculous but made complete sense. "I don't want to be stepped all over."

Okay so Frank let's everyone push him around, and that was Gerard getting upset about it. Next chapter is coming up.

Raese.