Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance
So this is what it feels like.
3 reviewsFrerard Oneshot. To those of you who know my writing style,it consists of a short,random scene with a flashback and a bit of fluff.That seems to be my pattern nowadays.
0Unrated
So this is what it feels like?
To finally truly be loved and to love someone.
Ha. I always imagined it. I always dreamed it.
Want to know the best thing about dreams? Not only can you have almost whatever you want,but you can't get hurt. That's why I'm always in my head.I never even made the attempt to talk to Frankie.My fear of happiness almost overpowers my fear of being hurt.Or maybe I'm just afraid of everything.I always looked into the mirror and spat at my reflection that I was going to die alone.I believed it too.
I had a firm belief that I was useless.
Just a good-for-nothing freak with long black hair and oddly pale skin and a weird crooked smile and creepy small teeth and yeah yeah yeah.
Well you know what?
I don't think I'm as useless as I did.
I think I have a purpose and my purpose is for Frank Anthony Thomas Iero.
Proof that something in this ugly world radiates beauty.
Not the kind of beauty that some kind of porn star radiates when her clothes are scattered and she is posing for a camera.
Or the kind of beauty the sun shines on it's brightest of days.
Not even the kind of beauty that a painting so intricate with it's colors and designs that look so impecable to the human eye that it frustrates you to the core of how you are the same species of whoever painted the masterpiece.
It's a different kind of beauty.
Kind of haunting,but a little less violent.
A subtle lingering.
Where the smallest features can immense to such great heights compared to the tallest of mountains through a simple opinion in perspective.
His eyes.
So deep and rich,yet subtle.
His skin.
So soft and clear and smooth.
His lips.
So delicate and soft and gentle.
Him.
So perfect and beautiful.
I don't know if luck had anything to do with it.
Luck has never done me any justice.
It seemed so simple.
And in all honesty,it was.
The world didn't stop turning.
"Hey."
I looked up to see a pair of sparkling green and brown eyes looking at me.
"Hi..." I convert my attention from my sketching.
"What are you doing there?"
When I tore my eyes from his,I glanced back at my paper and then back to him.
"Drawing."
"Can I watch?"
"Uhm...if you want..."
I started to move over in the booth in the small coffee shop,but he didn't make an effort to sit next to me.He sat right across from me.I furrowed my eyebrows a bit.
"Continue." he chimed.
"But you won't be able to see."
"I can see all I need to from here." he smiled.
My mouth turned up at the corner,slightly.
I went back to my drawing,with my sketchbook leaning upright on my lap and against the table where he had no sight whatsoever of my drawing.
I went on with my drawing.
I imagined that his eyes would feel like two holes burning into the top of my skull,but they felt oddly comforting-even though I didn't dare look up into them.Nowing they were there made me feel a bit at ease.
Any awkwardness I was anticipating just wasn't there.
After what felt like an hour,I sat back in my seat and examined my work,pleased with myself.
I sat it on the table.
"Done." I said.
I looked up and he had a thoughtful expression on his lips.His eyes were soft and warm.
He was undoubtedly good-looking.To an extreme extent.
He had a strong jaw-line and his shoulder-length hair graced it gently.
His eyes were brown with sparkling green flecks sprinkled in them.The more I looked at him,the more breath-taking he became.
"Did you know that you're a very beautiful person?"
It was a weird question.
Of course I didn't think of myself as...beautiful.
I felt my face get a little hot.My mouth hung open slightly and my eyes widened a bit.
"You don't have to answer that-not that I think you were planning on it.I just wanted you to know.My name is Frankie."
He held out his hand.
"Gerard." I took his and shook it.
"Gerard" he said with ease.
"Well,Gerard,as much as I would love to sit here all night looking into those gorgeous hazel eyes of yours-which I really would-I should probably buy you some more coffee seeing as you need a refill." he winked and bounced off his seat to go get us some coffee.
I watched him walk to the counter.He was rather thin and very short.He was adorable and charming.
At that moment,I was filled with a hope I never thought I would have.
Maybe I wouldn't die alone.
That was easy enough.
So this is how it feels.
To have love fall into your hands without even looking for it or waiting for it or without even believing it existed.
I stare at the beautiful boy that is nestled in my arms and smile.
I inhale his warm scent and embrace his warmth.
He really is something.
He looks up at me with the same eyes he looked at me with on the day that we met.
He smiles and presses those perfect lips to mine and I let a warm feeling envelope the bottom of my stomach.
I smile at his lips and lean into the kiss and press harder against his mouth and release with a light,wet sound.
He was perfect and I loved him more than I had the power to.
I looked at my left ring finger and admired the sparkling gold band.
"I love you Frankie."
"I love you too Gerard."
So this is what it feels like.
"
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To finally truly be loved and to love someone.
Ha. I always imagined it. I always dreamed it.
Want to know the best thing about dreams? Not only can you have almost whatever you want,but you can't get hurt. That's why I'm always in my head.I never even made the attempt to talk to Frankie.My fear of happiness almost overpowers my fear of being hurt.Or maybe I'm just afraid of everything.I always looked into the mirror and spat at my reflection that I was going to die alone.I believed it too.
I had a firm belief that I was useless.
Just a good-for-nothing freak with long black hair and oddly pale skin and a weird crooked smile and creepy small teeth and yeah yeah yeah.
Well you know what?
I don't think I'm as useless as I did.
I think I have a purpose and my purpose is for Frank Anthony Thomas Iero.
Proof that something in this ugly world radiates beauty.
Not the kind of beauty that some kind of porn star radiates when her clothes are scattered and she is posing for a camera.
Or the kind of beauty the sun shines on it's brightest of days.
Not even the kind of beauty that a painting so intricate with it's colors and designs that look so impecable to the human eye that it frustrates you to the core of how you are the same species of whoever painted the masterpiece.
It's a different kind of beauty.
Kind of haunting,but a little less violent.
A subtle lingering.
Where the smallest features can immense to such great heights compared to the tallest of mountains through a simple opinion in perspective.
His eyes.
So deep and rich,yet subtle.
His skin.
So soft and clear and smooth.
His lips.
So delicate and soft and gentle.
Him.
So perfect and beautiful.
I don't know if luck had anything to do with it.
Luck has never done me any justice.
It seemed so simple.
And in all honesty,it was.
The world didn't stop turning.
"Hey."
I looked up to see a pair of sparkling green and brown eyes looking at me.
"Hi..." I convert my attention from my sketching.
"What are you doing there?"
When I tore my eyes from his,I glanced back at my paper and then back to him.
"Drawing."
"Can I watch?"
"Uhm...if you want..."
I started to move over in the booth in the small coffee shop,but he didn't make an effort to sit next to me.He sat right across from me.I furrowed my eyebrows a bit.
"Continue." he chimed.
"But you won't be able to see."
"I can see all I need to from here." he smiled.
My mouth turned up at the corner,slightly.
I went back to my drawing,with my sketchbook leaning upright on my lap and against the table where he had no sight whatsoever of my drawing.
I went on with my drawing.
I imagined that his eyes would feel like two holes burning into the top of my skull,but they felt oddly comforting-even though I didn't dare look up into them.Nowing they were there made me feel a bit at ease.
Any awkwardness I was anticipating just wasn't there.
After what felt like an hour,I sat back in my seat and examined my work,pleased with myself.
I sat it on the table.
"Done." I said.
I looked up and he had a thoughtful expression on his lips.His eyes were soft and warm.
He was undoubtedly good-looking.To an extreme extent.
He had a strong jaw-line and his shoulder-length hair graced it gently.
His eyes were brown with sparkling green flecks sprinkled in them.The more I looked at him,the more breath-taking he became.
"Did you know that you're a very beautiful person?"
It was a weird question.
Of course I didn't think of myself as...beautiful.
I felt my face get a little hot.My mouth hung open slightly and my eyes widened a bit.
"You don't have to answer that-not that I think you were planning on it.I just wanted you to know.My name is Frankie."
He held out his hand.
"Gerard." I took his and shook it.
"Gerard" he said with ease.
"Well,Gerard,as much as I would love to sit here all night looking into those gorgeous hazel eyes of yours-which I really would-I should probably buy you some more coffee seeing as you need a refill." he winked and bounced off his seat to go get us some coffee.
I watched him walk to the counter.He was rather thin and very short.He was adorable and charming.
At that moment,I was filled with a hope I never thought I would have.
Maybe I wouldn't die alone.
That was easy enough.
So this is how it feels.
To have love fall into your hands without even looking for it or waiting for it or without even believing it existed.
I stare at the beautiful boy that is nestled in my arms and smile.
I inhale his warm scent and embrace his warmth.
He really is something.
He looks up at me with the same eyes he looked at me with on the day that we met.
He smiles and presses those perfect lips to mine and I let a warm feeling envelope the bottom of my stomach.
I smile at his lips and lean into the kiss and press harder against his mouth and release with a light,wet sound.
He was perfect and I loved him more than I had the power to.
I looked at my left ring finger and admired the sparkling gold band.
"I love you Frankie."
"I love you too Gerard."
So this is what it feels like.
"
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