Categories > Books > Harry Potter
Grandpa Harry!
4 reviewsA glimpse of Harry's life during his retirement while living with his great-granddaughter Nellie and her two sons.
5Funny
Title: Grandpa Harry!
Premise: Harry’s first wife is Luna; his second wives are Su Li & Cho Chang whom he bought from a Dark Sorcerer. His great-granddaughter Nellie & her two boys (Ronald & Edward) guest star.
Summary: A small glimpse into the life of Harry as he enjoys his retirement in the home of his great-granddaughter Nellie Stonebridge.
Part 1 – Granddaughter Nellie
“Grandpa Harry?”
Harry gave a brief start as he was pulled out of his memories and looked up with a smile. His aging eyes were no longer helped by glasses much so all he really saw was a vaguely human shaped blur of pale blue robes topped with a mass of deep shimmering gold. He knew that gold blur was the wild untamed curls of his beloved great-granddaughter’s hair.
“Nellie?”
“Were you sleeping? I’m sorry I woke you if you were. I just wanted to ask if you would watch the twins for me. I have to go down to the preserve and check on several pregnant females.”
Harry grinned and nodded. He loved his two small great-great-grandsons. They were a delight in his golden years.
“Of course I’ll watch the boys. Don’t you worry; I’ll tell them a story or two.”
With that, Harry reached out one wizened hand and silently summoned his staff. While he didn’t use it to perform magic much anymore, he needed it just to help him walk. He’d abused his body when he’d been younger and it was now paying him back in the form of aches and pains.
Nellie hummed noncommittally and then gently helped him to his feet. As he slowly began to shuffle his way from his study to the main sitting room, she slowly followed with a sigh.
“I don’t know, Grandpa. First you tell me not to worry and then you promise to tell those two hooligans one of your stories. They always seem to find lots of mischief after one of your infamous stories.”
Harry snorted in amusement.
“So says the woman who once, when she was a young girl, set loose all of the owls in the local owl-post shop while demanding that they carry her away and deliver her like a letter to her Aunt Clara in Hogsmeade.”
Nellie huffed in his ear. “Yes well, who was it that gave me the idea and insisted that it would work?”
Harry chuckled and muttered, “Well, maybe it would have if you’d have written her address on your forehead like I said instead of just shouting out the destination.”
“I heard that old man…”
Harry chuckled once more and finally shuffled his way into the main sitting room of the small house. Two small boys age six looked up from a book they were sharing and leapt from their chairs. “Grandpa Harry!”
The two boys dashed over and danced around him in glee, laughing and shouting for a story. Grinning fit to burst, Harry brandished his staff at them playfully. “Back! Back, I say! Like a couple of untamed crups yipping at my heels!”
“Ronald! Edward! Stop that before you knock Grandpa down!”
Pouting, the two boys stopped bouncing about and Harry shuffled over to the comfortable wingback chair next to the fireplace. Using his staff to steady his balance, he carefully lowered his tired bones into the chair and sighed in relief. It was difficult to walk even that short distance anymore.
He poked the floor in front of him with the butt of his staff causing a thick woolen rug with golden tassels to form there. Another tap of the staff created two furry red pillows to appear on top of the rug. Satisfied he pulled the staff back and stood it straight up in the air next to his chair and let go. It hung there obediently waiting for its master to need it once more.
“Well, sit down you two. Can’t very well tell you a story if you’re on the other side of the room, can I?”
“Yay! A story!”
Twin gold-topped blurs rushed to the new carpet and briefly fought over who got which pillow and then quickly settled down. He didn’t pay attention to Nellie as she sighed softly at the thought of her children being corrupted by her beloved Grandpa even as she gathered her things together to head out to the preserve.
“So, which story do you want to hear today?”
Part 2 – The Flying Experiment
Twenty minutes later, Harry’s story of how he and his wife Luna had escaped from a cursed tomb on an enchanted flying carpet wound to an end. Both boys were suitably impressed. And excited.
“Can you make this carpet a flying carpet, Grandpa Harry?”
Harry frowned in thought and tugged at his beard. “Well, no.” His great-great-grandsons pouted in unison.
“Awww, nuts.” Was Ronald’s response.
“Yeah, nuts.” Agreed Edward.
“It’s not a real carpet, though is it? It’s just a bit of magic that I conjured up for you to sit on. It won’t hold the charms and spells needed to make it fly. Not like a real flying carpet, anyway.”
The boys glanced at each other and then looked down at the rug they were sitting on before looking back up at the ancient wizard in front of them.
“So,… it has to be a real carpet?”
Harry huffed a laugh. “Boy, I can spell anything to fly as long as it’s real. Carpet, broom, motorcycle, car…” he gave a wicked grin and winked, “your Grandma Luna’s favorite pair of shoes.”
“Her shoes?!” Ronald’s voice was a squawk of surprise.
“Oh yes.” Harry chuckled. “That little prank got me into a bit of trouble with the wives when Luna couldn’t figure out how to get herself down from the ceiling.”
The boys looked at each other again and grinned fiercely before turning pleading expressions on their favorite kooky relative.
“Will you spell our shoes to fly?! Please, Grandpa Harry! Pleeeeasse!”
Harry frowned at them for a long moment in thought and the boys were sure that he wouldn’t do it, but then he chuckled and nodded his head.
“Fine, fine. But go get your good boots. Those floppy things you wear about the house won’t be sturdy enough.”
With twin whoops of glee the two boys jumped up off of their pillows and raced towards their rooms. It didn’t take them long to dig through their closet and pull out two sets of child sized boots. Laughing in sheer enjoyment and excitement, they raced back down stairs with their prizes in hand.
When they returned to the main sitting room, the rug and pillows Grandpa Harry had conjured were gone and he was holding his staff again. He tapped the floor in front of him with it and said, “Put them right here boys and then back away.”
Quickly, they did as they were told and then watched wide-eyed as the old man muttered incantations and poked the boots with his staff. The alternately glowed different colors or vibrated and the very air seemed to crackle with magic.
Finally, after fifteen minutes of solid casting, Harry stopped and leaned back in his chair to breathe deeply, his eyes closed. A house elf popped into the room and silently handed him a cup of tea. Harry took a sip with a quietly muttered, “Thank you Trilby” before turning back to look at the twins.
“Well, try them on, then.” With a whoop of delight, both boys grabbed up their boots and crammed their feet into them. “Tie them up tightly and then just walk like normal. The boots will float up as you step. I put a limiter on them, so you won’t go higher than three feet in the air, but that’s a good thing. Don’t want to bash your head on the ceiling, after all.”
Within minutes, Harry sat back and encouraged his great-great-grandsons as they proudly walked about in the air.
Part 3 – Family Resemblance
“…can’t believe you let them walk about in enchanted boots that floated in the air! A story. That’s all that you said you’d do, just tell a story! They could’ve been hurt. They could’ve gotten outside. Why in the world…”
Harry cut her off mid yell.
“You look just like your Grandmother Luna. Did you know that?”
Nellie gaped at him in confusion. “What?”
Harry nodded his head. “Yep.” He pointed a gnarled finger at her. “You yell like her too.”
“Grandpa…what has that got to do with enchanting my boys’ boots to fly?”
Harry ignored her exasperated huff and leaned back in his chair, his eyes closed as he reminisced about the past.
“It was hard to rile her up and get her angry, but when you did… Oh, boy! Look out then.” He chuckled. “I remember once that she got in an argument with my other two wives over the existence of snorkacks. Luna and I had already been married for several years and had a child by the time Su Li and Cho Chang came back into our lives. And while I never regretted buying them away from that Dark Chinese Sorcerer, it did take them awhile to adjust to living as the concubines of a Light Wizard. To make matters worse, Luna simply confused and frustrated them with her visions and dreamy ways.”
Nellie frowned and flopped down gracelessly in the chair next to his. “That’s ridiculous Grandpa. I remember Nana Cho and Nana Su. They adored Grandma Luna and took great care of her after her accident.”
Harry nodded. “That’s true enough, but what you remember also happened after decades of the four of us living together as a family. What I’m talking about happened only months after Su and Cho became my wives. I married your Grandmother Luna because we were in love. I took in Cho and Su because they were old school friends that I found out were being horribly abused by the man they had been married off to. I literally purchased them from their husband.” Harry grimaced and shrugged. “I suppose I could have kept them as slaves or some such, but neither Luna nor I wanted that for either of them.”
Harry waved his hand and another tea cup popped into existence. Then the teapot lifted itself up and filled the new cup before it floated over to his own cup and topped it off. Nellie picked up the new cup and sipped at the tea.
“Thanks.”
Harry waved the teapot back onto the tray and grinned at her for a moment.
“Anyway, the point of the story is that I was winding up my current project at the time. The curses had been broken and cataloged and the site was declared safe. The goblins were all set to pour over the finds and sift through all that we had uncovered. I was looking forward to several months’ vacation and Luna wanted to do what we always had done; head off into the wilderness to search for the ever elusive crumple-horned snorkacks. Su and Cho, however refused to believe they even existed.”
Nellie snorted into her tea. “Boy, they were wrong!”
Harry chuckled right back at her and shrugged his agreement, “True. But we didn’t know that, yet.”
Harry took a sip of his tea. “I, of course, was more than happy to indulge your Grandmother in her desire to search out the last remaining pockets of the elusive snorkacks. Su and Cho, not believing they were real were both less than pleased at the thought of spending that much time in the wilderness, especially after living for several months in a tent at the site of a cursed tomb in an ancient and abandoned Aztec city.”
He grinned at Nellie with an almost boyish glee. “The fights over the existence of snorkacks were usually fairly one-sided, but than Luna finally lost her temper at them.” Harry cackled. “The hexes flew furious and fast after that!”
Nellie goggled at him for a moment and then snorted. “No wonder you get along so marvelously with Ronald and Edward…you’re nothing but a big kid yourself.”
Premise: Harry’s first wife is Luna; his second wives are Su Li & Cho Chang whom he bought from a Dark Sorcerer. His great-granddaughter Nellie & her two boys (Ronald & Edward) guest star.
Summary: A small glimpse into the life of Harry as he enjoys his retirement in the home of his great-granddaughter Nellie Stonebridge.
Part 1 – Granddaughter Nellie
“Grandpa Harry?”
Harry gave a brief start as he was pulled out of his memories and looked up with a smile. His aging eyes were no longer helped by glasses much so all he really saw was a vaguely human shaped blur of pale blue robes topped with a mass of deep shimmering gold. He knew that gold blur was the wild untamed curls of his beloved great-granddaughter’s hair.
“Nellie?”
“Were you sleeping? I’m sorry I woke you if you were. I just wanted to ask if you would watch the twins for me. I have to go down to the preserve and check on several pregnant females.”
Harry grinned and nodded. He loved his two small great-great-grandsons. They were a delight in his golden years.
“Of course I’ll watch the boys. Don’t you worry; I’ll tell them a story or two.”
With that, Harry reached out one wizened hand and silently summoned his staff. While he didn’t use it to perform magic much anymore, he needed it just to help him walk. He’d abused his body when he’d been younger and it was now paying him back in the form of aches and pains.
Nellie hummed noncommittally and then gently helped him to his feet. As he slowly began to shuffle his way from his study to the main sitting room, she slowly followed with a sigh.
“I don’t know, Grandpa. First you tell me not to worry and then you promise to tell those two hooligans one of your stories. They always seem to find lots of mischief after one of your infamous stories.”
Harry snorted in amusement.
“So says the woman who once, when she was a young girl, set loose all of the owls in the local owl-post shop while demanding that they carry her away and deliver her like a letter to her Aunt Clara in Hogsmeade.”
Nellie huffed in his ear. “Yes well, who was it that gave me the idea and insisted that it would work?”
Harry chuckled and muttered, “Well, maybe it would have if you’d have written her address on your forehead like I said instead of just shouting out the destination.”
“I heard that old man…”
Harry chuckled once more and finally shuffled his way into the main sitting room of the small house. Two small boys age six looked up from a book they were sharing and leapt from their chairs. “Grandpa Harry!”
The two boys dashed over and danced around him in glee, laughing and shouting for a story. Grinning fit to burst, Harry brandished his staff at them playfully. “Back! Back, I say! Like a couple of untamed crups yipping at my heels!”
“Ronald! Edward! Stop that before you knock Grandpa down!”
Pouting, the two boys stopped bouncing about and Harry shuffled over to the comfortable wingback chair next to the fireplace. Using his staff to steady his balance, he carefully lowered his tired bones into the chair and sighed in relief. It was difficult to walk even that short distance anymore.
He poked the floor in front of him with the butt of his staff causing a thick woolen rug with golden tassels to form there. Another tap of the staff created two furry red pillows to appear on top of the rug. Satisfied he pulled the staff back and stood it straight up in the air next to his chair and let go. It hung there obediently waiting for its master to need it once more.
“Well, sit down you two. Can’t very well tell you a story if you’re on the other side of the room, can I?”
“Yay! A story!”
Twin gold-topped blurs rushed to the new carpet and briefly fought over who got which pillow and then quickly settled down. He didn’t pay attention to Nellie as she sighed softly at the thought of her children being corrupted by her beloved Grandpa even as she gathered her things together to head out to the preserve.
“So, which story do you want to hear today?”
Part 2 – The Flying Experiment
Twenty minutes later, Harry’s story of how he and his wife Luna had escaped from a cursed tomb on an enchanted flying carpet wound to an end. Both boys were suitably impressed. And excited.
“Can you make this carpet a flying carpet, Grandpa Harry?”
Harry frowned in thought and tugged at his beard. “Well, no.” His great-great-grandsons pouted in unison.
“Awww, nuts.” Was Ronald’s response.
“Yeah, nuts.” Agreed Edward.
“It’s not a real carpet, though is it? It’s just a bit of magic that I conjured up for you to sit on. It won’t hold the charms and spells needed to make it fly. Not like a real flying carpet, anyway.”
The boys glanced at each other and then looked down at the rug they were sitting on before looking back up at the ancient wizard in front of them.
“So,… it has to be a real carpet?”
Harry huffed a laugh. “Boy, I can spell anything to fly as long as it’s real. Carpet, broom, motorcycle, car…” he gave a wicked grin and winked, “your Grandma Luna’s favorite pair of shoes.”
“Her shoes?!” Ronald’s voice was a squawk of surprise.
“Oh yes.” Harry chuckled. “That little prank got me into a bit of trouble with the wives when Luna couldn’t figure out how to get herself down from the ceiling.”
The boys looked at each other again and grinned fiercely before turning pleading expressions on their favorite kooky relative.
“Will you spell our shoes to fly?! Please, Grandpa Harry! Pleeeeasse!”
Harry frowned at them for a long moment in thought and the boys were sure that he wouldn’t do it, but then he chuckled and nodded his head.
“Fine, fine. But go get your good boots. Those floppy things you wear about the house won’t be sturdy enough.”
With twin whoops of glee the two boys jumped up off of their pillows and raced towards their rooms. It didn’t take them long to dig through their closet and pull out two sets of child sized boots. Laughing in sheer enjoyment and excitement, they raced back down stairs with their prizes in hand.
When they returned to the main sitting room, the rug and pillows Grandpa Harry had conjured were gone and he was holding his staff again. He tapped the floor in front of him with it and said, “Put them right here boys and then back away.”
Quickly, they did as they were told and then watched wide-eyed as the old man muttered incantations and poked the boots with his staff. The alternately glowed different colors or vibrated and the very air seemed to crackle with magic.
Finally, after fifteen minutes of solid casting, Harry stopped and leaned back in his chair to breathe deeply, his eyes closed. A house elf popped into the room and silently handed him a cup of tea. Harry took a sip with a quietly muttered, “Thank you Trilby” before turning back to look at the twins.
“Well, try them on, then.” With a whoop of delight, both boys grabbed up their boots and crammed their feet into them. “Tie them up tightly and then just walk like normal. The boots will float up as you step. I put a limiter on them, so you won’t go higher than three feet in the air, but that’s a good thing. Don’t want to bash your head on the ceiling, after all.”
Within minutes, Harry sat back and encouraged his great-great-grandsons as they proudly walked about in the air.
Part 3 – Family Resemblance
“…can’t believe you let them walk about in enchanted boots that floated in the air! A story. That’s all that you said you’d do, just tell a story! They could’ve been hurt. They could’ve gotten outside. Why in the world…”
Harry cut her off mid yell.
“You look just like your Grandmother Luna. Did you know that?”
Nellie gaped at him in confusion. “What?”
Harry nodded his head. “Yep.” He pointed a gnarled finger at her. “You yell like her too.”
“Grandpa…what has that got to do with enchanting my boys’ boots to fly?”
Harry ignored her exasperated huff and leaned back in his chair, his eyes closed as he reminisced about the past.
“It was hard to rile her up and get her angry, but when you did… Oh, boy! Look out then.” He chuckled. “I remember once that she got in an argument with my other two wives over the existence of snorkacks. Luna and I had already been married for several years and had a child by the time Su Li and Cho Chang came back into our lives. And while I never regretted buying them away from that Dark Chinese Sorcerer, it did take them awhile to adjust to living as the concubines of a Light Wizard. To make matters worse, Luna simply confused and frustrated them with her visions and dreamy ways.”
Nellie frowned and flopped down gracelessly in the chair next to his. “That’s ridiculous Grandpa. I remember Nana Cho and Nana Su. They adored Grandma Luna and took great care of her after her accident.”
Harry nodded. “That’s true enough, but what you remember also happened after decades of the four of us living together as a family. What I’m talking about happened only months after Su and Cho became my wives. I married your Grandmother Luna because we were in love. I took in Cho and Su because they were old school friends that I found out were being horribly abused by the man they had been married off to. I literally purchased them from their husband.” Harry grimaced and shrugged. “I suppose I could have kept them as slaves or some such, but neither Luna nor I wanted that for either of them.”
Harry waved his hand and another tea cup popped into existence. Then the teapot lifted itself up and filled the new cup before it floated over to his own cup and topped it off. Nellie picked up the new cup and sipped at the tea.
“Thanks.”
Harry waved the teapot back onto the tray and grinned at her for a moment.
“Anyway, the point of the story is that I was winding up my current project at the time. The curses had been broken and cataloged and the site was declared safe. The goblins were all set to pour over the finds and sift through all that we had uncovered. I was looking forward to several months’ vacation and Luna wanted to do what we always had done; head off into the wilderness to search for the ever elusive crumple-horned snorkacks. Su and Cho, however refused to believe they even existed.”
Nellie snorted into her tea. “Boy, they were wrong!”
Harry chuckled right back at her and shrugged his agreement, “True. But we didn’t know that, yet.”
Harry took a sip of his tea. “I, of course, was more than happy to indulge your Grandmother in her desire to search out the last remaining pockets of the elusive snorkacks. Su and Cho, not believing they were real were both less than pleased at the thought of spending that much time in the wilderness, especially after living for several months in a tent at the site of a cursed tomb in an ancient and abandoned Aztec city.”
He grinned at Nellie with an almost boyish glee. “The fights over the existence of snorkacks were usually fairly one-sided, but than Luna finally lost her temper at them.” Harry cackled. “The hexes flew furious and fast after that!”
Nellie goggled at him for a moment and then snorted. “No wonder you get along so marvelously with Ronald and Edward…you’re nothing but a big kid yourself.”
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