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One day at lunch Brendon Urie sat down at the table and cheerfully announced, "Hi I'm Brendon Urie. Pete said I could sit here if I wanted, that's okay, right?"

Ryan turned bright red and almost passed out.

Spencer smirked at him. "Sure, you can sit here, Brendon."

"Cool!" Brendon said. "Hey which one of you is Ryan? Pete said you like Moulin Rouge too!"

Ryan made a sort of squeaking noise and glared at Pete.

"He is," Pete said, pointing to Ryan.

Brendon turned to him with a big grin. "OMG! I love that movie, it's the greatest ever, besides Aladdin, but anyway, sometime we need to watch it together and sing along together okay? You can be Christian and I'll be Satine and I love all the songs and the Duke is such a jerk and Ewan McGregor is so hot and I love that movie!"

"Brendon, honey, calm down a little,” Vicky-T said. "Remember what I said about scaring people away when you do that?"

"Sorry," Brendon said quickly. "I just love making new friends."

"You're worse than Pete and Gabe," Patrick said. "That's ridiculous."

"Well I get really hyper sometimes and Mikey Way gave me a cookie in Spanish class today and I also had Red Bull for breakfast and also a lollipop, which are the greatest things ever and yeah. Sugar makes me really hyper," Brendon said.

"Apparently," Spencer agreed.

"Do you think we can use the power of the Cobra to get him to stop talking?" Patrick asked.

"I don't think even the Cobra is that powerful," Gabe said.

"Oh you mean like that weird snake thing on livejournal you told me about the other day? That's so weird. But really cool I guess. I don't really like snakes but cobras are cool," Brendon said.

"So you like the Smashing Pumpkins and Blink-182, right? Ryan does too," Pete said.

"OMG. They're amazing. Smashing Pumpkins are awesome and they have that awesome song Tonight, Tonight. And other songs too but that's my favourite. And Blink-182 is really cool. I saw them live once it was really cool," Brendon said.

"Uh. Yeah," Ryan said.

"And I love your hair, it's so cool! Where do you get it cut? I want mine cut like that! And that's an awesome hoodie. Pete says you like Victorian clothes. I do too. That's so cool," Brendon said.

"Uh huh," Ryan said.

"OMG, I just remembered I promised Sisky I was going to help him with our English homework, I have to go, but I'll talk to you guys later, and sit here from now on, okay? Okay, bye! Have a good day everybody!" Brendon said, getting up from the table and walking away.

Ryan just stared after him.

"Ryan, are you retarded? Why didn't you talk to him? He obviously thought you were really cool!" William said.

"He didn't really give me the chance to talk!" Ryan protested. "How much did you tell him about me, anyway, Pete?"

"I might have mentioned you a little more than everybody else," Pete said. "But it was for your benefit!"

"Yeah, and now it has to be obvious that you're trying to get us together!" Ryan said.

"Honey, it's Brendon," Vicky-T said. "Nothing is obvious to him."

Ryan just sighed. "How do I get him to realize I like him, then?"

"Tell him," Vicky-T said.

"I can't," Ryan said automatically. "I'm way too scared. I'd rather just imply it."

"It'll go over his head," Vicky-T warned.

"I don't know, but you have to channel the power of the Cobra," Gabe said.

"Yeah," Pete agreed. "It worked for Patrick and I."

"Yes. Definitely need to use the power of the Cobra," William said.

Spencer rolled his eyes. "I don't know, give him one of those cute Valentine's Day kind of teddy bears or something," he said.

"Make him a mix CD with love songs on it. He obviously likes music," Patrick said.

"Give him chocolate," Travis said. "Everybody likes chocolate."

Pete glared at him. "That didn't work for me, you know."

"That's your own fault. You're the idiot that called 'Trick fat," Travis said.

"Patrick! Not 'Trick!" Patrick said, glaring at him.

"Okay," Ryan said. "You guys have something of the Cobra I can borrow?"

Gabe handed him a bracelet with a Cobra. "Just be careful with it," he said.

"Yeah," Ryan agreed. "So I'll try the CD first, and then the teddy bear, and I guess the chocolate if nothing else works."

"You have the Cobra on your side now. You should be fine," Pete said. "But don't call Brendon fat."

Ryan rolled his eyes. "Wentz, I know better than that," he said.

"You're so stupid, sweetie," Patrick said to Pete, giving him a kiss.

"I'm so torn about if that was a good thing or not," Pete said, pouting.

Patrick kissed him again.

"Good thing," Pete decided. Patrick laughed.

"Ew, stop it!" Spencer said.

Patrick kissed Pete again.

Spencer glared.

Patrick raised his eyebrow and then kissed Pete again.

Spencer glared more.

"Keep glaring, Spencer!" Pete said, as Patrick kissed him again, this time on the cheek. "It's working to my benefit."

Spencer got up and left.

"Cool," Patrick said.

"Let's kiss some more!" Pete said.

Patrick listened.


The next day at lunch Brendon sat with them. "Hi guys! What's up? Guess what! In Spanish Mikey Way gave me a cookie again and then his brother Gerard came in and gave me a cookie too! And they were really good and I asked them where they came from and they said Frankie Iero made them! So I told Frankie I loved his cookies in math and he gave me some more!" he told them excitedly.

"I love Frankie," Pete said. "He's really smart and got me to date Patrick."

"Yeah. Frankie is amazing!" Travis agreed.

"Did you know his birthday is Halloween?" Ryan asked. "That is probably the coolest thing ever!"
"You like Halloween?" Brendon asked.

"I love Halloween!" Ryan said.

"Me too cause you get lots and lots of free candy and you get to dress up and I always have awesome costumes and I watch The Nightmare Before Christmas all day because Tim Burton is like, God. And Halloween is amazing," Brendon said.

"Yeah," Ryan agreed. "Uh. I have something for you." He held out the mix CD to Brendon.

"OMG! What is it?" Brendon asked, taking it.

"Just a mix CD," Ryan said.

"Oh, cool!" Brendon said, smiling sweetly at him.


The next day at lunch Ryan asked, "Did you listen to the mix CD yet?"

"Yeah! It was so cool, thank you! I love that Ben Folds song, it's so sweet. And of course lots of Beatles is always a good thing," Brendon said. He showed no sign of having gotten the point of the songs.

Ryan turned to Patrick. Patrick shrugged.

"Oh! I have to go find Frankie, he has cookies for me, I'll be back though, and Gerard has a comic book for me to borrow, so I'll see you guys in a sec," Brendon said and left.

"I'm sorry!" Patrick said. "I didn't realize he was that oblivious."

"That's just typical Brendon, sweetie," Vicky-T said. "I swear, he'll only figure it out if you actually tell him."

"It's teddy bear next, right?" Pete asked, knowing that there was no Ryan was actually going to just tell Brendon.

"Yeah," Ryan said. "Wish me luck."


The next day at lunch Ryan gave Brendon a pink and red teddy bear with hearts.

"Aw, this is so cute!" Brendon said. "This is kind of funny because my friends used to call me Brenny Bear and this is a teddy bear and maybe it should be Brenny Bear since it's my bear and I like it a lot, thanks!"

"Don't you think it's weird he got you a teddy bear?" Pete asked him, trying to get him to connect with the reason.

"Nah," Brendon said. "It's sweet. Ryan is such a nice friend! And I hardly know him but he's already the coolest guy I've ever met and he gives me stuff and he's so nice!"

Spencer snickered.

"But why do you think he gave you a teddy bear?" Travis asked.

"Because he's nice!" Brendon said. "Duh!"

Spencer started laughing and had to make it look like he was coughing.

Ryan sighed and decided this might be harder than he had originally thought it would be.


A few days later Ryan gave Brendon the box of chocolates. (It was Cobra shaped- Gabe insisted it would help it work as long as he didn't call Brendon fat.)

And Brendon took the box, thanked him, ate the chocolate at lunch and proceeded to spend the rest of lunch talking about dinosaurs, and completely did not get the point.

And Ryan really didn't know what to do next.


In the end, Ryan was very thankful that William was a very smart guy.

Because when Ryan called him that night, depressed, saying, "William, what else can I possibly do?" William actually had an idea.

"You know how you asked all of us for dating advice? What you need to do is ask him and then do exactly what he says. It'll be so obvious that even he can't miss it," William suggested. "Well, hopefully."

"You know, Bilvy," Ryan said. "You are still the greatest, even if you're in a snake cult and are dating somebody as obnoxious as Gabe."

So the next day Ryan listened to William's advice. He found Brendon after class at his locker and went over to him.

"Hey, Brendon," he said.

"Hi Ryan! What's up? How as your day? Mine was great, Frankie keeps giving me cookies all the time, and I got a really good grade on my report in Spanish class!" Brendon said.

Ryan laughed. "Awesome. My day wasn't bad," he said.

Brendon just smiled cheerfully at him. "So why are you visiting me at my locker, amigo?" he asked.

"Just wanted to ask you for some advice," Ryan said.

"Advice?" Brendon asked, raising his eyebrow.

"Yeah. Dating advice. I mean, you're a lot more sociable than I am, I figured you'd know more. I kind of like this guy and I want to ask him out, but I don't know how," Ryan said.

"Oh!" Brendon said, and he looked kind of disappointed, but then he smiled. "Okay! Well, I'd say just ask him."

"I'm too afraid," Ryan said. "Way, way too afraid."

"Well, then tell him in a note or something. Like the, will you date me, y/n thing that's totally middle school," Brendon said. "It's cute. And give them a lollipop. Lollipops are the best and increase the chance of dates by 75%."

Ryan laughed. "Okay," he said. "Thank you!"


The next day Brendon opened his locker and found a lollipop with a note on it that said, "Want to go out with me y/n? From, you know who."

He grinned, circled yes, and then found Ryan at his locker.

“Hey, I have a note for you," Brendon said, handing him the note.

Ryan quickly took the note and made sure that it said yes. Once he knew it did, he grinned at Brendon.

"You really didn't have to be afraid of me, you know," Brendon said, giving him a hug. "I've liked you all along."

"Awesome!" Ryan said.

"Is that why you were getting me all those gifts?" Brendon asked.

"Yeah," Ryan said.

Brendon laughed. "You're so nice," he said.

There as a silence until Brendon said, "Although, it's weird cause you put your name down as You Know Who and that just makes me think of Voldemort and Voldemort is just a creepy snake dude and he has that giant scary snake and I don't want a creepy snake dude so I'm glad it's you and not him."

Ryan burst into laughter. "I have a pretty big snake too," he said, winking.

Brendon just stared at him for a second and then said, with a laugh, "You spend way too much time around Gabe."

Ryan just laughed and kissed him.