FicWad

Key Notes:

“Text”= Japanese talking

“+American English talking+”

“/British English talking/”

“#Australian English talking#”

Thick rum brown eyes heavily closed in sleep. Simon Williams quickly opened his eyes in the morning. He was lying in bed under his stripper cat girl duvet cover. The birds were singing outside. It was now seven o’clock. Today was Monday. He would begin school in a couple of hours. But first, there were a couple of things to do. His alarm clock went off right on time. Simon pressed the button to turn it off. “Young Lust” by Pink Floyd began playing loudly. It wasn’t his favorite song, but it was good to wake him up for the morning. Especially… Well, stick around in a couple of minutes to find up.

The boy rose out of bed in his white pants[1] and stretched a bit. He then began his exercises for the morning. This was routine of his. Simon believed in a healthy body to match his overwhelming charm. He was doing crunches, pushes ups, lifting weights, doing pull-ups, and pushing himself up and down against his bed on the floor. Simon always got outstanding marks in gym class through his school years. After his little workout, the English boy admired himself in the mirror. Simon was just drop dead gorgeous. His hair was short and chestnut blackish brown. He had a fit and tone little body. Girls would always take a long hard look at him and drool. Simon was good-looking and he knew too well!

Outside, his younger sister, Darcy was walking home from a night of partying. She may have looked like an angel on the outside. But, Simon knew her true nature as much as she knew his. Back inside, Simon’s watch beeped out loud. He looked at his black Sportsman #32 Timex watch and smirked to himself. “Show time!” he thought. The sly old handsome devil walked over to his large bay window and pushed his heavy navy curtains aside. He looked out smiling. This was the best part of the morning. His hot neighbor across the street had walked over to her bedroom window. She was a spicy lady. This woman was one three pure-blood Japanese women living in the British slum that Simon and Darcy lived in within Tokyo. Every morning, his neighbor would walk in front of her large window and take off her snow cotton white yutaka after her morning bath. Her long silk black hair only came down just inches to her mid back. She had a nice body of course. (She had to; otherwise Simon wouldn’t bother looking out his window at her every morning.) The woman had a nice ass to boot. And to top it all off, she never wore anything under her yutaka. One could see why Simon came to down to breakfast smiling.

Today was no exception to the rule. Simon watched his neighbor with a smirk on his face. Outside, Darcy was coming closer to the two-story white townhouse that she lived with her older brother and parents. She was looking up at the windows knowing that Simon would be up by now. The eleven-year-girl stopped in front of Simon’s window. She waved to get his attention. Simon was too busy enjoying the view across the street to notice at first. The woman on display was trying to decide what to wear today as she picked through her many beautiful kimonos. Darcy tried waving for her brother to create a distraction for her to get in again. After a few seconds, Simon looked down and saw his sister. She was signaling him to help her get in again. Simon sighed slightly annoyed and took one last look across the street. The woman had picked out a dark green silk kimono with a sugar pink obi and took it back into the room with her. Simon closed the curtain and turned to his radio. Darcy waited outside impatiently. Inside, Simon switched the music to Jimi Hendrix’s “Crosstown Traffic” and turned the volume up to the maximum volume. It was all mundane for him. Just a few more seconds…

“/SIMON!!!!/” his father yelled out. The boy turned to his closed bedroom door smiling. He turned back to the window and signaled Darcy that it was okay to go in now. Darcy quickly walked into the house at that moment.

“/GOD DAMN IT, SIMON!!!!/” the dad yelled out to his son in dark brick red pants. He was a man close to thirty-nine. His hair was already grey with his age. He ate pretty well for an English man. The hairs on his chest, legs, and arms weren’t really attractive though. But, he was prone to lose his temper too easily. Simon acted like he didn’t hear his father.

“/SIMON!!!!/” the man yelled out again.

“/SORRY!!!” the boy yelled. “/THE VOLUME’S STUCK AGAIN!!!/” While the men were arguing in Simon’s room, Darcy hurried up the stairs to her room.

“/TURN IT DOWN!!!/” their father yelled.

“/I’M TRYING!!!/” Simon yelled back as he was acting like he was trying to turn his radio down.

“/EVERY F***G MORNING!!!/” the father yelled. “/WHY DON’T YOU EVER GET THE SODING THING FIXED?!?/”

“/ALRIGHT! ALRIGHT!/” Simon yelled back. Darcy made it upstairs just in time. She peeked into Simon’s room before going on. Their father ranted on as Simon pretended to try and turn the music down. Darcy made it to her room and started getting dressed in her schoolgirl uniform. This was always the perfect diversion. Their father was such a hot-head. It was amazing that he didn’t explode into anger.

“/SIMON!!!/” their father yelled over and over again. Pretty soon, this all proved to be pointless.

“/SHITE!!!/” he yelled out. The man exited the room and slammed the door behind him. Simon looked up smiling. That also always made his day. Making a mockery of his father was just so much fun. The man would just explode in anger. Simon cut the music off and began planning out what to wear for the day.

Darcy was wiping the make-up off of her face to get rid of the evidence of last night’s party. She and Simon were a very strong team. They both knew each other really well. That’s why they functioned beautifully. Meanwhile, Simon was in the bathroom reading Heart of Darkness while his father pounded on the door.

“/F**k it!/” he yelled. “/How long are you going to be in there?/”

“/Not long now!/” Simon called.

“/Oh f**g bollocking twat f*k!/” his father yelled. “/Can’t a man ever use his own bathroom in his own house?!?/” He kicked on the door outside. Simon flushed the toilet and began brushing his teeth. Then, he decided to drive his father nutters again. He left the tap water running. Simon opened the bathroom window and climbed out. The door was still locked. The father pounded on the door again. He rested his head against the door stressed out.

“/Oh Jesus Christ!/” he swore out loud. Simon made it outside on his feet. He slid down the white mental drain pipe with the toothbrush still in his mouth. He made it in front of his door. The boy looked over and saw his neighbor smiling at him. Simon smiled back at her and spit out the toothpaste in the grass. She got her paper and went inside. He went in as well.

The boy made it right into the kitchen. His mum was in the kitchen cooking. She was a gentle soul unlike her husband. Her long blonde hair was pinned back into a messy bun. She was still dressed in her satin white pajamas and matching robe. She too looked about close to her late thirties.

“/Morning sweetheart!/” she said to him. “/Want some pancakes?/”

“/No thanks,/” he said. Then, Simon rinsed his toothbrush in the kitchen sink.

“/Darcy’s not herself,/” she said. “/She doesn’t seem to well./” The girl was at the table eating. Their father was still yelling at the bathroom door. Darcy and Simon looked at each for a moment. Simon poured himself some cercal as Darcy ate her toast. Their mum walked closer to the table as her husband came down the hall ranting even more.

“/What the Hell is he doing in there?!?/” the father yelled as he came into the kitchen. He was surprised to see Simon sitting at the table eating.

“I think the lock’s broken again,” he said causally. “The drill is under the sink.” There was a moment of silence. His wife, Katie, went back over to the stove. The man looked at his son again. He snorted aloud.

“/You take me for a completely James Blunt, don’t you?/” he grumbled. Then, he walked over to the sink. Simon smiled to himself in a mischievous way. Winding his dad up with so entertaining.

“/What do you want then?/” Katie asked.

“/I want to f***g piss!/” the man snapped. The children looked on quietly. His wife turned to him.

“/Bill,/” she said calmly. “/I’m always wondering. Do you have to swear all of the time?/” He didn’t answer her at all. Bill just kept looking for the drill. He sat down on the ground frustrated.

“/Oh, sodding f***g bollocky shite wank!!!/” he snapped again. “Where is the twat?!?”

Subject: Simon

After breakfast, Simon walked out the door. Inside the house, his dad worked on the bathroom lock with the drool.
“/EVERY F***G MORNING?!?/” he yelled out again in frustration. Simon just smirked to himself as he kept walking. On his way to school, something caught his eyes. A gold and yellow moving van was a few blocks down where he lived. Curious, the boy walked over to the house. He pointed over the fence. A woman about twenty-eight years old was directing the moving men to carry a chest into the white two-story townhouse. Simon was slightly surprised. “Oh damn!” he thought. “Somebody bought the Wisteria house already?!? It was only on the market for eight days!” He was really interested now. So, Simon kept watching. This was interesting already.

A red Yaris was parked in the freshly cut lawn. The car doors opened wide. A man and a girl stepped out. Simon looked at the girl closely. She was a skinny blonde haired girl. The girl looked really pale. She looked about Simon’s age. The girl was dressed in a white and brightly colored polka dot dress. He could tell that she was English. Only English people moved to British slums in Japan. (Okay, there were some exceptions. But that was very rare.) But that wasn’t what really caught Simon’s eye. The girl had a book catalog for Tokyo Cram College. Simon’s eyes lit up brightly. That was the school that his mates and him attended. “Oh I see,” he thought. “The new girl is going to be a student at TCC!” Then, an idea came into his head. This called for a party tonight. Plus, he could “help” out his pal, Sid.

Suddenly, the new girl looked over at him. Simon noticed her as well. He waved at her in small way. The girl just stared at him blankly. Simon smiled to himself and headed off to school again.

In order to throw a good party, one had to invite many people first. So, Simon whipped out his trusty sidekick and began making some calls. He first dialed Sid. At his best mate’s house, his cell phone buzzed, but there was no answer.

“/F**k off!/” the boy mumbled in a tired way. Simon became frustrated.

“/Wake up Sid, you twat!/” he barked.

“/I’m sleeping!/” the answer phone[2] said.

“/No, you’re not!” his pal yelled.

“/Or I just don’t want to talk to you. Please leave a message!/” the answer phone went on. Then, it beeped on the other line.

“/You’re a lazy trud, Sid!/” Simon said. “/We have plans today! Consider your cock ringling!” Then, he hung up. Then, Simon dialed the next number. He waited for a few seconds.

“#WAAA!!!#” Emma’s answer phone yelled. “#Ha-ha! Got ya! I’m not in, you whackers! Leave a message!#” Simon hung up again.

“/Jesus!/” he muttered. “/Doozy f***s!/” Then, he tried another number. Shuichi, Hiro, and Fujisaki were in the studio recording some new material for their third album when their phones went off. They all paused for a moment. Sakano-san looked at them confused as well. Fujisaki hit enter on the keyboard. The boys all answered their phones.

“Williams-kun,” Fujisaki said on his phone. “What?”

“Hey Suguru!” he said. “Can you nip around and wake Sid up?” (The boy is very fluent in Japanese. “/One has to learn the language in order to get anything you want around here./” he reasoned.)

“Go over there?” Hiro asked. “He’s miles from the studio!”

“Yeah!” Simon cut in. “Just nip round and quickly--”

“We’re trying to record some work for our new album here!” Fujisaki cut in. Then, some ringing came through on Simon’s phone.

“Hang on a second, boys!” he said. “I’ve got another call coming in! Hang on for a moment!” Then, he switched over to the next call. Fujisaki sighed and rolled his eyes. Every single time he did this!

“Jesus!” the keyboardist murmured under his breath.

“/Hi, my little Treehugger!/” Simon said on the other line to the next call.

“/Don’t call me that!/” Casper yelped on the other line.

“/But it’s true!/” her boyfriend said. “/You are a hippie, so therefore you are a tree hugger as well!/” Casper rolled her eyes annoyed as she climbed out of the bathtub. She sighed aloud.

“/I’m not a tree hugger!/” she snapped.

“/Deny it all you like,/” he said. “/Anyway, you know the Wisteria House on my block, right?/”

“/Yeah,/” Casper said. “/Why?/”

“/We have some new blood now,/” he replied. Casper froze in surprise.

“/Are you serious?/” she asked him. “/That house was only for sell for eight days!/”

“/Yeah! I figured we grab her up before someone else does!/” he said. “/Plus, I need you to help me with Sid today./”

“/What?!?/” she asked.

“/You know, Sid and the virgin thing!/” he said.

“/You weren’t serious!/” she called.

“/Look,/” he said. “/He’s got to pop his cherry tonight and I’ve nominated you to help out!/” Casper sighed aloud again annoyed.

“/God, Simon!/” she said. “/Do I have to?/”

“/Look, you promised!/” Simon told her. “/Hang on, I’ve got Emma on the line. Stay there./” Then, he switched over to his other friend. Casper shook her head to herself.

“/Whatever!/” she mumbled under her breath.

“#Ja!#” Emma said under her sheets in bed. “#You rang?#”

“/Where the f**k is everyone?/” Simon hissed. “/It’s nine o’clock!/” Emma smiled to herself in a bright way.

“#Bed!#” she said.

“/Can’t you go around and get Sid?/” he demanded.

“#Can’t!#” Emma replied. “#I’m busy! Busy, Busy! Remember?#” A smirk came across Simon’s face.

“/Ah!/” he said. “/Golden Duck boy?/” The boy from the Chinese restaurant was looking right at Emma lustfully on the other line.

“#Yo!#” Emma said proudly.

“/Give him a big Hello from me, yeah?/” Simon replied.

“#Yeah!#” the Aussie girl said. “#And much more while I’m at it! Alright, laters!#” Then, she hung up the phone. Simon continued on his trip to school talking to Casper.

“/So anyway,/” he said. “/It’s not that much to offer. Sid’s almost seventeen. If he doesn’t get laid before his birthday, he can’t be my friend anymore obviously!/”

“What the f**k are you talking about, Simon?!?” Shuichi asked over the phone.

“Whoops!” the handsome devil replied. “Sorry, Shuichi! Wrong call! Can you guys hold?”

“No!” Fujisaki cut in.

“Perhaps you care to help out with Sid’s cherry!” Simon offered.

“I don’t think so, Williams-kun!” he snapped. “You need someone deaf, blind, and stupid for that!”

“That’s unkind!” Simon replied.

“Bye, Williams-kun!” Fujisaki said.

“Wanna come to a party tonight?” the English boy asked. “We have some new blood with us today. We got to grab her before someone else does!”

“New blood?” Shuichi asked.

“Yeah,” the English boy replied. “In the Wisteria House in neighborhood.”

“But that house has only been for sell for eight days!” Hiro replied.

“Yeah, I know!” Simon said. “We’ve got to reach in and grab her!” The keyboardist was not interested at all.

“Goodbye, Williams-kun!” Fujisaki hissed again. “Quit calling Bailey-chan ‘Tree Hugger!’”

“It’s true!” Simon replied. “She’s a hippie, so…” Then, he heard a click on the other line. Then, there was a second click.

“So what about the new blood?” Shuichi asked. Simon smiled to himself.

“I’ll tell you when we get to school,” he replied.

“Okay,” the lead singer replied.

“Shindou-san!!!” Fujisaki yelled in the background. “We have work to do! Get off the phone!”

“Got to go!” Shuichi said quickly. “Bye!” Then, he hung up quickly. Simon looked at his phone oddly. Then, he switched back over to Casper. She was putting on her make-up for the morning.

“/You still there?/” he asked.

“/Alright!/” she called.

“/What?/” Simon asked.

“/Alright!/” she called. “/I’ll help Sid out! If you’re so desperate!/”

“/Sweet!/” he said. “/We’ll do it at the party, yeah? Meet us at the café so we can plan!/”

“/I have to plan?/” she asked.

“/Oh yeah!/” Simon replied. “/Later Tree hugger!/”

“/I said don’t call me a Tree--/” Casper yelled right before her boyfriend hung up. The young hippie pouted for a moment. Then, she looked at herself in the mirror!

“/I’m not a Tree Hugger!/” she said aloud to herself. Meanwhile in the Buddhist temple, Ando was starting on his morning meditation. He had been in the faith for ten years now. This was all second nature to him. It was all quiet at first, but then his cell phone rang. He looked around quickly and answered it.

“I can’t talk right now?” he whispered. The boy tried to rush Simon off of the phone, but the monk grabbed him by the ear and dragged him out of the temple.

“OW! OW! OW! OW!!!” he screamed out in pain. The monk fussed at him for even having his cell phone with him! He rubbed his ear in pain. Once outside, Ando held his phone to his ear.

“Thanks, Simon!” he hissed. There was silence on the other line.

“Simon?” he asked.

“/Hello Mr. Wilson!/” Simon said on the bus. “/It’s Simon!/”

“/Hi Simon!” the man called. “/What can I do for you?/”

“/Is Sid up yet?/” the boy asked. “/We’re all so worried about Sid. He’s got a sociology test in ten minutes. So…/”

“/WHAT?!?/” Mr. Wilson snapped. “/HE’S WHAT?!?/” Meanwhile, Sid was still asleep in his bed. His bedroom door was opened wide.

“/WAKE UP YOU LAZY LITTLE FOUR-EYED F*-UP!!!/” Sid’s father yelled out. The boy slowly woke up as the mobile[3] was tossed at him. He grunted aloud as he woke up.
“/MOVE IT YOU COMPLETE AND TOTAL F**G SODING WASTE OF F**G SPACE!!!/” Sid slowly picked up the phone.

“/What?/” he asked in half-awake voice.

“/Café now!/” Simon ordered. “/We’ve got things to talk about!/”

“/Like what?/” Sid asked. Simon grinned up to his ears.

“/Virgins!/” he called.

“/What?/” Sid asked.

“/Virgins!/” Simon replied. “/Virginity!/” Sid put on his glasses.

“/Whose?/” he asked.

“/Yours, you idiot!/” his mate replied. Then, there was a beep on the other line. That caught Sid’s attention right away.

“/Go on,/” he said. “/I’m listening./”

“/Hang on, Sid!/” Simon called. Then, he switched to the new call.

“/Simon?/” his mate asked.

“Thanks, Si!” Ando snapped at him. “My sensei wants to lower my chances of Nirvana!”

“No, he doesn’t!” Simon said. “You’re sensei’s lovely!” Ando sighed aloud.

“What was it?” he asked aloud.

“Party tonight,” said Simon. “We’ve got some new blood. And Sid’s getting de-cherried.”

“I promised Lucas, Lexie, and Emma I would go with them to Shuichi’s little gay night out,” Ando said. Simon looked confused.

“Is Emma gay?” he asked.

“No,” he replied uncertain.

“Are you gay?” Simon asked.

“No!” Ando said quickly. “But Shuichi says I’ll get to meet lots of hot women there!” Then, two students were walking by him. He quickly lowered the phone and looked around. Once they were gone, Ando put the phone to his ear.

“They are desperate because there’s nobody to screw except for me! Emma’s going to help with Lexie if she has one of her… you know…” Simon nodded.

“Ahhh…” he said. “Ando, you dippy twat! Sid’s flying solo on the tunnel of love and he’s needs support, yeah?” Ando paused for a moment. Then, he smiled brightly.

“Could we watch?” he asked. Simon had a look of disgust on his face.

“Oh Jesus!” he said quickly. Then, he hung up the phone. Then, he dialed the next three numbers. Shawn was asleep in his bed when his mobile rang. He picked it up and answered it.

“/What Simon?/” he hissed.

“/Hey old chum!/” the handsome devil said aloud. Shawn rolled his eyes to himself.

“/What do you want, you moron?!?/” he hissed.

“/Two things. One, we have new blood today!/” Simon replied. That caught Shawn’s attention right away. He sat up quickly.

“/New blood?/” he asked. “/Where?/”

“/In the Wisteria House on my block,/” Simon replied. Shawn was impressed.

“/That fast?/” he asked.

“/Yeah,/” Simon replied. “/So we have to swipe in and grab her and help Sid pop his cherry./” Shawn had stopped listening at “grab her.”

“/Okay,/” he said. “/I’ll see you on the green./”

“/Sweet!/” Simon said. Then, they hung up. Shawn climbed out of bed.

“/You’re leaving already?/” his girlfriend, Cherry, whined to him from the sheets.

“/Yeah,/” he said. “/I’ve got to go look at the new blood that we have./” Cherry pouted at him.

“Okay,” she said. Then, she got out of bed and got dressed as well.

Simon smirked to himself proudly. Onto the next number now. Nick was just about to head out the door when his cell phone. He tried to ignore it at first because he knew who it was. “I don’t want to talk to Rat Face at all!” he thought. But then, the call kept being persistent. Finally, Nick just rolled his eyes annoyed. “Okay, Rat Face!” he thought. “You win!” Then, he picked up his phone and answered it.

“/What Simon?/” he asked.

“/Nicky-boy!/” the handsome called. “/We’ve got new blood in the Wisteria House!/” Nick froze in surprise.

“/You’re joking, right?/” he asked.

“/Nope,/” Simon said. “/I saw her myself. So are you in to take her for ourselves./” Nick thought about that for a moment. On the one hand, this was spending time with Simon. But on the other, another fresh chance to corrupt the innocent once more. But options were pretty challenging…

“/Alright!/” he said. “/But you stay away from me at all costs!/”

“/Right…/” Simon replied. Then, he hung up. Two more to go. But who to call first? Simon dialed up the first number that came into his mind.

Lucas was brushing his teeth when his cell phone went off. He picked it up and answered it.

“+Hello?+” he asked.

“/Luke!!!/” Simon called out. Lucas rolled his eyes and groaned.

“+What is it now, Simon?+” he asked annoyed.

“/Why aren’t you happy to hear from me?/” the English boy asked.

“+Cut to the chase, Simon!” the American boy snapped.

“/We’ve got new blood today, yeah/” he said. “/In the Wisteria house!/” Lucas froze in surprise.

“+Somebody bought that house already?+” he asked.

“/Yeah!/” he said. “/And I’d thought I’d give her a warm welcome. Care to help out?/” Lucas thought about that for a moment. He didn’t like the sound of that one at all. Nothing legit ever came out of Simon’s mouth. But yet, Lucas felt a need to protect this new girl from a path of corruption. There was only one way to do that.

“+Fine!+” he said. “+But I am keeping her from you.+”

“/Sure, mate,/” Simon answered. Then he hung up. Simon was now walking along the city streets to school. That left one more person.

Lexie was working in the Gold Hummingbird Shelter for Battered Women filling in for the day when her cell phone rang. She looked around nervously. None of the staff was allowed to make phone calls unless on break or it’s emergency. And judging by the ringtone, it was neither. It was just Simon being annoying again. And something told her that he wasn’t going to stop today until she answered him. There was only one way to fix this. Lexie answered her phone and hurried outside.

“+Simon!!!+” she wailed. “+I told you not to call me at work!+”

“/This won’t take long!/” he insisted. “/We need you tonight!/”

“+Sorry!+” Lexie said. “+Shuichi has his first gay night out! Us and the group!+”

“/The group?/” Simon asked.

“+Yeah!+” Lexie replied. “+We’re going out on a voyage of wonder and discover!+”

“/F**k that!/” Simon said. “/Look Lexie--!/”

“+Make this quick!+” she called. “+I have to go!+”

“/Come on!/” Simon called.

“+You’ll get me in trouble!+” she said.

“/Okay,/” he said. “/Meet me on the yard before English, yeah?/”

“+Got ya!+” she said. Then, Lexie hung up. She hurried back inside before anyone even noticed her gone. Simon switched back over to Sid.

“/Sid!/” he said on the phone. “/Sid you still there?/” His pal was wanking[4] off to a hentai mag. He was really going to town on it.

“/Sid!!!/” Simon yelled out. The other boy quickly returned to end.

“/Yeah!/” he said quickly.

“/A personal briefing is essential!/” Simon said sternly. “/Café! Twenty minutes!/” Sid looked on confused.

“/Tonight’s the night we de-cherry old baby!/” Simon went on. “/We finally make you into a man with a girl of legs and breasts!/” Then, Simon finally hung up. Sid hung up smiling as well. He was overjoyed to here that! He lifted up the sheets and looked at his member.

“/You hear that?/” he asked it. “/I’m going to be a man tonight!/” In twenty minutes, Sid was in the café as he was told. He was downing some cinnamon-flavored coffee. Simon made his way over to his mate. He sat down right in front of him smirking in silence. They had known each other since they were two years old. Simon was always the dominate one of the pair. His mate just followed his every word ever so faithfully. Sid wasn’t a fully attractive bloke. But, he was pretty decent. Nine times out of ten, the boy looked like he needed a bath even though he was clean already. He had some chestnut dark brown hair. His eyes were a light hazel color. They always hid behind his black-framed glasses. The boy was only sixteen years old. He always wore black and dark grey colors. Today, he had on a light grey t-shirt and black jeans with his usual black trainers[5] and grey socks. Oh and he was wearing his black beanie hat. Sid was finishing off his breakfast and tapped his cigarette against the ash tray. He coughed a bit in misery. The boy took a few moments to breathe again. He cleared his throat hard.

“/I’m crap in the mornings,/” he reasoned.

“/You’re always crap!/” Simon corrected. “/You don’t exercise, too much rubbish, and too much caffeine./”

“/F**k off!/” Sid replied. Then, he paused for a moment.

“/I didn’t really have a sociology test today, did I?/” he asked. Simon shook his head smiling.

“/No,/” he replied.

“/F**r!/” Sid mumbled under his breath. Then, he took another bite of his breakfast. He looked Simon dead in the eye.

“/This better be good!/” he called. Simon smiled at him richly.

“/Trust me, Sid!/” he said. “/Tonight, we go to a party! We meet up with the new girl and then you finally pop the cherry. Not with her, though. You finally get the VIP tour of pleasure city! Finally--/”

“/F**k off!/” Sid cut in. But, Simon pressed on.

“/Finally!/” he said. There was a slight pause of silence.

“/It’s embarrassing!/” Simon spoke up. Sid looked up at him quickly.

“/It’s common and quite normal for somebody at sixteen to still be a virgin!/” he argued back with food in his mouth. Simon shook his head.

“/It’s embarrassing, Sid!/” he contradicted. There was another pause.

“/Shite!/” Sid mumbled before swallowing. “/Right, how?/” This was another mental game coming up. That was another powerful trait of Simon’s. He could sell a fridge to an Eskimo. That was only the first part. More was coming up soon.

“/We go to the party,/” Simon began. “/And we get a girl catastrophically spiffed up. In her confused state, she comes to believe, however momentarily, that you’re attractive enough to shag./” Sid looked up at his friend again.

“/Who’s the lucky girl, then?/” he asked. Simon smirked at him again.

“/Well,/” Simon answered. “/You’re really going to love this!/” Sid looked up and out the café window. Casper was walking to the café.

“/Oh yes!/” Simon added on. “/You are a very lucky lucky little boy!/” Sid watched on as the young hippie beauty came closer to the café. She was just smoking hot! "Casper":http://noizjohnson.tripod.com/GoingChapel.html was only sixteen years old like them. She would make a great pin-up girl on Playboy during the 60’s. Her hair was long brown and wavy. Her eyes were a mix of green, grey, and blue. Casper was highly fit as a English girl. She had nice gravity-defying breasts and level hips. Casper was a tall girl as well. Tall and fit were a great combination. She looked great in almost everything that she wore. Today, Casper was dressed in a short blue denim jean miniskirt and a frilly white peasant blouse with short sleeves. Her brown leather sandals barely touched the pavement. She also had on black stockings. Her black leather schoolbag and colorful vintage 60’s jewelry completed her look. Sid looked on in lust. Time seemed to have stopped as she walked on. Sid looked at Simon overjoyed.

“/Casper?/” he asked aloud. Simon looked at her and turned back to his friend.

“/I’m going to do it with Casper?/” Sid asked in shock.

“/Whoa, hang on Sid!/” Simon spoke up. His pal was really happy now.

“/Oh my God!/” he went on. “/I’m going to get into the pleasure kingdom with Casper! Aw, cheers[6] Simon! Oh, I don’t how to…/” Then, Sid quickly went back to his breakfast. The hippie babe entered the café like a princess on the red carpet. She came over to the boys like an angel.

“/Hi,/” she said to the boys. Then, she kissed Simon on the lips. He kissed her back. They didn’t really stop kissing after that.

“/Must be…/” Sid spoke again as he looked up. His face dropped into despair when he saw Simon and Casper making out once again. They always did this when they were together. The couple were always hot and heavy in public. It drove all of their group nuts with it. (“They might as well just f**k in public!” Fujisaki said one day in disgust.) Sid looked at his plate is discomfort. He began to eat a little faster as well. Simon and Casper kept on making out in public. Some of the other diners were staring at them now. It never failed with them. This was getting too much with them now. Sid put down his fork.

“/Are we getting me laid or should I start filming and take it back for private time?/” he asked aloud. Casper and Simon both looked up at him. They all instantly got back to work again.

“/Alright,” Simon said. “/Who’s stupid enough to f**k Sid?/”

“/Arisu!/” Casper spoke up instantly. Sid looked up at her instantly and pointed his fork at her.

“/She’s still in hospital,” he argued.

“/No she’s not,” the hippie replied. “/They let her out today. She’s just aloud not to have no knives./” Sid looked at with a surprised stoic face.

“/Aright,/” he said reluctantly. “/She’ll do./”

“/You’ll need a lot of drugs!/” Simon spoke up. “/Alright, I’ll tell you what. Get an ounce, we can sell at the party and give the new girl some.” Sid looked at him for a moment.

“/I have to get an ounce of spliff?/” he asked.

“/Sure,/” said Simon. “/There’s this guy in China Town Tokyo. He’s an old mate of mine./”

“/Well, why don’t you go?/” Sid argued.

“/Can’t!/” he mate said. “/I’ve got tai-chi, then my pagaent audition, and English!/”

“/Arisu’s great in the shack!/” Casper added. “/As long as she’s not hungry or cutting herself./”

“/Who says?/” Sid asked.

“/Everyone!/” Simon and Casper said together. Sid thought about that for a moment. Simon smiled at him again.

“/Okay,/” Sid said. “/F**k it! Just get his name./” Simon reached into his pocket and pulled out a card. He handed it over to his pal.

“/It’s all on there,” Simon said. Sid took the card and read over it. He put it into his pocket and slid out of the booth. Simon and Casper looked at each other lovingly. Sid read the card again. A puzzled look came onto his face.

“/His name is Snake Cock?/” he asked. “/Why would he have a name like that?/”Simon and Casper weren’t listening at all. They were flirting with each other again.

“/I’m waking up your tai-chi karate kit!/” Casper whispered to him lustfully as she was rubbing along his right thigh. Her hand moved further up to his manhood. Sid sighed aloud stressed and headed out of the café. Simon and Casper looked at each other loving lust in their eyes. They were like the perfect sexy pair in Tokyo.

At eleven o’clock, the piano at White Dove’s School for Girls was playing for their chorus pageant coming up in three weeks. Simon was on the center stage in the auditorium singing for the main male role. His song of choice was “Sakura Sakura.” Not only could Simon speak Japanese fluently, he could sing it as well. (“/One has to learn the language in order to get anything you want around here./” he always reasoned.) He sounded just like a lusty angel. The teacher played on happily. The girls were all watching on impressed at such a charming prince.

Meanwhile, Sid was on the bus looking at pictures of Casper on his phone. He had a huge crush on the lovely hippie girl. Sadly, she only had eyes for Simon. He had many pictures of Casper in his phone. Behind him, an old man was looking on in lust. He noticed, when he felt someone breathing hard on his nape. Sid whipped around quickly. The old man quickly looked away. Sid turned back to his phone and lust. He finally got off the bus and walked to Tokyo Cram College. He looked around for a moment and walked on.

When Simon finished his song, the girls were all giggling in lust. The teacher to him smiling warmly. Simon waited for a response.

“That was lovely, Simon,” the teacher said to him. “Really, quite lovely.”

“Thanks,” he replied confidentially. The teacher kept on impressed.

“I’m sure we’d love to have you in the pageant,” she said. The girls were still giggling.

“Looking forward to it!” Simon replied. Then he grabbed his bag, slid it onto his shoulder, and headed out the door. A girl rushed up in front of him. She was a pretty-looking thing. This girl had long peach-pink hair to her shoulders and navy blue eyes. The white and black schoolgirl uniform looked so cute on her. She too was English just like him. This schoolgirl was one of the cheerful perky cheerleader types. She was smiling at him brightly.

“/Hi!/” she said to Simon quickly.

“/Hi,/” Simon said back.

“/My friends think you’re really cool in there,/” the girl went on.

“/Your sorry?/” he asked her confused.

“/My friends!/” she said again. Simon looked back into the auditorium. The whole class was staring at him giggling and whispering. The English boy turned back to the girl.

“/So you’re still coming to my party tonight?/” she asked him. “/I mean it would be so lame and dead. And bring some fun! Because my parents are in Spain. You know, we’re just going to go wild on drum and bass!/” Simon smiled a bit.

“/Sounds great!/” he said.

“/After eight-thirty,/” she went on. “/Because Miriam and I have to get back from my koto recital./”

“/No problem,/” Simon replied.

“/And bring some friends?/” she asked. Then, Simon’s phone began to ring.

“/Sure thing!/” he said. “/I’ve got to go!/” Then, the boy hurried out of the room. The girl turned back to the room and ran over to her friends grinning. Simon was walking through the halls on his phone.

“/You find Arisu and the new girl yet?/” he asked. “/They’re coming, right? Oh for Christ sake’s Casper, tell them got spliff and she can choose and all sushi and whatever they can eat! Alright, sweet! I’m going to English and then I’ll come jump you, yeah? Yeah, baby if you like! I’ll do you with a magic marker. Got any oils? Nice! Warm it up for me tonight! Superfly!/” The headmaster was putting up some new flyers when he heard Simon talking on the phone. Anger came to him in a rush.

“You, boy!” he shouted to the intruder. Simon hung up and turned around.

“What the devil are you doing here?!?” the headmaster snapped.

“Interview!” Simon replied.

“Like hell you are!” “This is an all-girls school! Where should you be, boy?” Simon walked closer to him.

“Tokyo Cram College across the yard!” he replied.

“Right!” the headmaster hissed. “And you think that you can just walk in here and seduce the young ladies? Do you actually--?”

“I was auditioning for the pageant!” Simon cut in. “Responding to your ad on your website! For all male parts, man!” The headmaster stepped up closer to him.

“My name is Kamiya-san and I am the headmaster here and addresses as ‘san!’” he barked. “Do they even have a high standard at that cram school of yours?”

“They do!” Simon replied.

“And what do you call your headmaster?” Kamiya-san asked. Simon leaned in a bit.

“Master!” he called. The girls were all laughing as he walked away. The headmaster was really pissed off and began ranting at the English boy as he began walking away.

“I’ll report you to your school!!!!” Kamiya-san yelled even louder. “You common little trud!!!” Simon picked up his phone and dialed again.

“/Hey, it’s me!/” he said. “/Yeah, you found him yet?/” Sid was on the other line in the China Town part of Tokyo. He was looking in the driveway at a high-class Honda. The front license plate said, “SC.” Then, his attention turned to the house. This place was top-dollar and very beautiful. Sid looked on confused.

“/I think so!/” he said. “/I don’t know, Si. Simon, it’s f***g weird, okay?/”

“/I don’t care if it’s weird, Syd!/” Simon barked on the other line. “/Just get on with it!/”

“/Alright,/” his friend said. Then, he hung up the phone. Sid worked up to the front door and knocked on the door. Then, his cell phone rang. He reached into his pocket and got out his phone. The boy answered it right away.

“/I told you, Simon!/” he snapped as the door opened in front of him. “/I’m f***g doing it, okay?/” A woman came up to the front door. Sid looked up from his call at her. She looked like a common whore in a black kimono robe. The boy froze for a moment.

“/Hi mum!/” he said. The whore looked him up and down.

“You Monty Dirty?” she asked him.

“/Look mum, I’ll call you back!/” Sid said quickly.

“You Dog Hill?” the whore asked.

“/Look mum, I’ll ring you back!/’ Sid insisted. The whore finally opened the door.

“Come in for Christ’s sake!” she said. Sid walked inside.

“/Where are you?/” his mother asked.

“/I can’t tell you right now!/” Sid argued. The hooker was complaining about digital cameras and pervs as she looked around. Then she shut the door.

“/Look mum,/” he said. “/I’ve got to go! I’m not talking to anyone at all! I’ve got to go!/” The whore turned upstairs.

“Sayuri!” she called. “Little geek boy here for you!” Sid quickly covered his other ear.

“Is he yours?” the woman asked. Another hooker came down the stairs and looked. Both the first whore and Sid looked on.

“/Hi,/” he said.

“You here for a maximum or a threesome?” Sayuri asked. Sid paused for a moment as the first whore turned to him.