FicWad

If there was ever a gaze...
That meant anything at all...
I never would have known.
If there were ever days..
when i was on your mind..
You never made it seen.
Now I sit here lonely..
The distance between our worlds...
getting harder and harder to take.
There isn't anything I wouldn't give...
To see you standing...
here again.
slowly... giving in to doubt...
I can't control my emotions.
the flood gates have opened..
the dam is broken.
The tears sting as they roll down my face...
staining my cheeks with discontent
From the memories in my head.
Jesus doesnt Exist to me...
I'm critisized each day for that.
I dont know if i believe in a god...
But does that mean i cant pray?
I'm sorry but i do.
~
I cry each nite...
Looking for a truth..
an answer to explain
all i feel with the thoughts of you.
I dont need you...
I can live on my own.
I know i love you...
But sometimes that just isnt enough.
Im not exactly clueless...
I realize there are limits...
But does that mean that i cant be...
with somebody who really cares for me?
~
The words i write...
No longer rhyme..
The songs dont make sense...
The chords are wrong.
My journal pages falling out...
this pen running out of ink.
I'm finally letting go..
giving up on everything.

********

Authors note: hey people please leave me some nice reviews, i would apreciate it.. i realize that its not perfect, but it was just a myspace blog i had written and i thought it would be good to post here as well.