FicWad

Note about this letter: A bunch of my "friends" run this all-teen theatre organization, and I can't say the name on here, but they have a thing called "The Board of Directors" aka a bunch of teenagers who are all butt buddies sit around and cast each other in leading roles in their shows. They're really well-known in town, and I've written a one-act in one of their shows and I've been in two, including the one I'm in right now...but I wasn't allowed on to their "board of directors" because I'm "too busy with my own company, Stage Hands Performing Arts" and "directing my school shows". Which is complete horseshit. Oh, and all the new board members are gonna be seniors next year, so they'll have a year to make a difference. HAHAAHAHAHHAA.

P.S.: I blocked out the name of the organization and all people involved.

without further adeu...

Dear blahblah Board of Chauvinist Assholes…er, I mean, Board of di-errections, I mean, Board of Directors. Sorry, I can’t spell right. I’ve just had “too much going on” that it’s affected my ability to spell.

I’m writing to you to let you know you all are favortist bitches. Maybe it’s because in the blahblahTheatre Department, it has been said blahblahis a favortist pig…maybe you get your skill of bias from that? I’m not really sure. I’m not entirely sure how this “process” (if you’d call it that…the interviews were completely staged just so you could say “Well, we had formal interviews!”) was conceived. I can believe that blah,blah,blah…(more like blahRaging Cunt; that should’ve been her name in the fuckin’ parody. (see *) Someone fo serious needs to kill this girl. Does anyone really like her?) possibly blah and blah voted against me. blah blah and blah don’t know me…blah probably thinks I’m immature, and blah is the devil herself…but I mean, blah and blah…what the fuck? I thought you were my friends, you two-faced sluts. I mean, blah, you’re a Mormon, you’re automatically crazy for believing in that shit…and blah, I know you’re kindof a gossipy bitch at times…but aren’t we all?
I mean, let’s look at the dynamics. blah…ok choice. I mean, besides acting, I don’t quite know what he has to offer…he’s kinda smart. blah…eh…you could do better. blah, I don’t know her, blahblah!? Come on…isn’t he a fucking senior? What are blah and blah even going to fucking contribute. They’re fucking warm bodies. No intellectual capacity whatsoever. I mean, I hope you realize you just set up a board with 90% of its members leaving next year…it’s gonna be as ineffective as possible. But your goal really isn’t aimed towards effectiveness; it’s all about let’s make our BFFs happy and put them as board members.
I have the truth, and you don’t want to hear it. First off, I’m smarter than each and every one of you fuckers. I’m a fuckin’ prodigy in theatre. I can form ideas like nobody’s business. As much as I hate to admit it, that succubus we call blah is actually somewhat smart in a director sense…not that she has any actual skills otherwise. blah just wants to control everything, but she’s the only fucking responsible one out of you completely useless sacks of shit. You have no real interest in theatre. You just like being in plays. Art? What? No. You have no intentions of changing theatre in this world, and that’s automatically what makes Stage Hands Performing Arts better than blah Shit blah: we actually have a mission and actually push people. I know, it’s a fucking remarkable concept. Oh, and also unlike blah—I can actually direct and run entire production.(see *) I was a first-time director when I was fucking fourteen and I gave more direction than her! I mean, what the fuck! Did it occur to anyone that maybe Siobhan wasn’t the best candidate to direct? Now, granted, the show turned out okay, but I mean…most if it was pretty damn mediocre. And also, blah, who isn’t even ON the fucking board, was your costume designer? That’s really fair, blah. Also, the blahblahblahwould’ve sucked without my one act.(see ) Not to mention it is completely true, although you all favor each other—you guys just LOVE your self-promotion. I mean, you guys really are killing yourself to get your name in the limelight, you pathetic bunch of losers.
To be honest, I don’t even know if a spot opened up on your precious board if I wanted to take it. If you didn’t want me in the first place, then you lost me, and I’m gonna end up being better than you bitches in the long run. (:
And good luck with blahblahblah even though it’s gonna suck because you’re trying to “punk it up”, and you’ll all look like a complete bunch of posers (oh, that’s right…you already are. You’re posing to have talent)

Fuck you all, and don’t expect any fucking god damn participation from me. I should drop out of blah(see *) to “prove” to you that you treat others the way you want to be treated. You treated me like shit. The only reason I’m not dropping out of blah is because blah, the director is not on your cult board of productions (blah was the one who referred to you all as "culty", btw. blah'swords)

With love,
Sean Pollock

P.S. Go fuck yourselves…especially you blah, blah and blah you guys pissed me off the most.

*this references a one-act festival they did where i wrote a one-act that "innocently" made fun of the company. it was innocent at the time...it was spoofing how all of them want to overthrow each other...but who knew, it was actually true!
**this references a play i was in with them in March.
*this references a play i'm currently in with them.