FicWad

When the guys had left for their concert I plopped myself on Gerard’s bed. Being in the tour bus alone didn’t feel right. I didn’t like the feeling. Then it occurred to me that I hadn’t checked my phone in a few days.
When I checked it, there were a million messages from Nikki they all said stuff like, “Are you with Gerard?!” “Are you two falling in love?!” “You’re so lucky to be around Gerard so much!” “I bet you two are planning a wedding!”
I sighed and dialed Nikki’s number. She picked up after the first ring.
“Rose! Where are you!? Most importantly, where’s Gerard!?”
“Shut up, Nikki. I’m tired of you gawking at him all the time; he’s an average guy who has an average talent for singing.”
“You’re probably with him right now! No wait…no way! You’re in the tour bus aren’t you?!”
I sighed deeply. She wasn’t getting it. I hung up on her. I wasn’t going to talk to her for awhile.
I lay down on my back on the bed. I never realized how boring life was without Gee around, or Dra- I mean Frank, or any of the guys. I got my iPod and turned it on, but the first song that started playing was Early Sunsets Over Monroeville from My Chemical Romance, but I now looked at the lyrics differently, I understood them better, I started to understand the story.
It was about two people falling in love…but it seemed that the guy lover was a vampire and couldn’t let the girl uncover his secret, he shot her, and her last words were: I Love You.
I put the song on repeat, every word Gerard screamed or sang my heart beat got faster. What if that happened to me? What if Gerard’s made up fantasy became real? I rolled over on my side and curled up in a ball.
I don’t want that to happen. But if that did happen and if I die with Gerard having a gun to my head…did he love me for me? Or for my blood? The question was repeated over and over as I listened to the song…
We were together, curled so tightly that there was almost absolutely no space between us. Gerard’s smile was indescribable; it was all that I wanted to see. It was what made me happy. He held me tightly as my hands ran through his hair.
We weren’t in the tour bus bedroom. It looked more like his bedroom. Everything was even softer then I could imagine and the bed sheets were silky. Everything kind of looked like a white blur; I honestly thought it was heaven. But then I saw something black in Gerard’s hand. I couldn’t make out what it was; he held it tightly and had it against the bed.
As his hand came up I could see the object better, and as my vision became clearer I recognized that it was a gun. My eyes widened but I couldn’t move, I tried to struggle but I felt too weak. He put the gun to my head; the metal felt icy cold as it made its way through my thick hair and onto my head.
All I could do was utter the words: “I Love You” as he pulled the trigger. The white, became blood red, then black.
I woke up with a gasp and found myself clutching onto Gerard while he looked worried, tired, and shocked. The sun was setting and my heart beated faster as I realized that the title of the song that made me realize danger said that it was sunset when the girl had died.
I frantically pushed Gerard away from me; I pushed him so hard that he grunted. I quickly jumped out of the bed and ran out of the door, I caught a glimpse of the sunset out of the window before I tripped over something. I realized I still had my iPod on my ears so I had tripped over the wire.
Luckily Frank caught me.
“Are you okay?” Frank asked.
I didn’t answer; I hid behind Frank as Gerard ran toward me then picked up my iPod and realized what I had been listening to.
“Oh god…” he said.
“What’s wrong with you?” Frank asked me.
I just shook my head.
“Look, if you don’t want to tell me, just go with Gerard and everything will be fine.”
I didn’t look at him; I looked at the floor and nodded. Without even glancing at Gerard, I let him gently guide me back into the room. When he closed the door he just stared at me. Then he spoke.
“I can’t believe you think I would do something like that to you.” He whispered.
“I…I had a dream... that would happen.”
Gerard came closer to me and soon enough I was against his chest, I looked up at him. He had tears in his eyes. Then it occurred to me that I had been clutching on to him when I woke up.
“I hurt you again…both your heart and your body…” I said.
I wanted to see the damage I had done, to see how much pain I put him through so that I could feel ashamed. So I began to tug off his shirt but he grabbed my wrists.
“I don’t want you to not touch me any more…to think you have a barrier. I suggest you not look.”
“But I have to. I…”
He shook his head.
“I-I don’t want to hurt you anymore…”
Forgetting he was hurt since I couldn’t see anything I hugged him tightly. He yelled and fell to his knees with me wrapped around him so I fell with him. I quickly let go of him and his head fell to my chest so his cheek was against it. Carefully and gently I held him against me, he was breathing heavily and I could feel his hot breath. I knew he could hear my heart beat. I was his only support, without me there he would fall to the ground.
If I held him any tighter I would probably hurt him again. Right now Gerard was so fragile…I had hurt him so much. Gently I pushed him far enough away from me so that I could lift his shirt. My eyes widened as I looked up and down his body, he looked away from me.
This was worse then the last time…way worse. I somehow, I don’t know how, got close to breaking bones. I put a tiny bit of pressure on his chest with my hand and he gasped in pain. To him, it probably felt like a hard punch. I couldn’t get lower or I would reach something I didn’t want to reach.
“H-how is it down there.” I asked him nodding to the area.
He screwed up his face.
“Painful.” He answered.
Tears welled up in my eyes; this needed to be taking care of by the hospital.
“It wasn’t your fault, love…” he whispered.
“Yes it was! I’m such an idiot! Hurting you over and over! I was so afraid of you hurting me, when the whole time I was hurting you!” I said angrily. Then I sighed. “You need to go to a hospital.”
“NO!” he shouted. “No…”
Gerard held my wrist tightly.
“We’re going home, love. I can’t be on the road any longer. We’re headed to L.A.”
I sigh and put my head gently on his chest, he sucks his teeth so I automatically get off him, but then he held my head to his chest.
“I don’t want you listening to my first album; it will get too many things in your head. Most of the songs in there were just my thoughts…of what could happen with vampires.”
I pulled away from him and helped him up.
“You must me tired…maybe you should get some rest…”
I began to gently push him toward the bed. But then his eyes turned bed red. Shocked, I froze. He gently removed my hands from his chest with his eyes locked on me. Then by my wrists, he swiftly pulled me toward him. Before he could get what he wanted I gently put my finger into his slightly opened mouth and felt one of his fangs. Gerard bit down quickly, unable to help himself.
After a few seconds he pulled me even closer and in one fast movement (to quick for a human) moved to my neck. One of his hands held my wrist; the other was on my waist. He led me on the bed with his fangs still in my throat. I couldn’t take much anymore, my vision was a blur. After about fifteen minutes, I fainted.
When I woke up Gerard’s fangs were still on my neck, but he wasn’t drinking blood anymore, he was asleep. He had fallen asleep while drinking my blood. The fangs were beginning to hurt.
“Gerard?” I whispered.
He didn’t wake up.
My mind was spinning and my neck began to throb, then there was a sharp pain.
“Gerard!” I shouted and I squeezed his wrist.
His eyes shot open, they were still blood red, and because he was startled, by mistake he plunged his fangs deeper. I screamed in pain, when he bit me, it was never by mistake, he had done it carefully and gracefully. Even when I screamed he didn’t stop, sooner or later he would drain me.
“Gerard! Get off!” I yelled.
I had no choice, I put so much pressure on his chest I could hear a muffled yell against my neck, but he didn’t stop, if anything he went deeper. Tears began to stream down my face. Gerard held me tightly and pulled me closer to him, one hand was now on my neck the other wrapped around my waist.
There was even more pain. I was breathing heavily, and getting weak. His body began to tense. And he began to pull away when I caught his neck; he was now inches away from my throat.
“Just kill me.” I whispered.
I could feel he stare on my neck.
“I’m a monster, I was letting my blood lust take over my love for you.” He whispered in my ear.
Slowly and carefully he licked the blood clean off my neck. Then he looked into my eyes, his were still blood red. There was blood dripping from his mouth. His fangs prodded out with blood all over them. I touched them and stared. He pushed my hand away.
“I want so much more. You have no idea how much I want to drain all of your blood…it tastes so tangy and sweet too. I’ve never come across blood like yours.”
“You only love me for my blood?”
“I love you for you my Black Beauty. I just can’t help myself with your blood.”
I slowly pulled him toward me and kissed him softly. I could taste the blood in his mouth as he kissed me back, I could feel his fangs with my tongue. I held him tighter and wrapped my legs around him. Again I heard him yell but it was muffled by the kiss. All the parts of my legs were on him, from my ankles all the way up to my upper thigh. I didn’t even care that my private area was up against his. But when he yelled I began to pull away but he only kissed me harder and put his hand on my upper thigh. When I looked into his eyes again, they were the beautiful hazel that I loved.
They were bright with excitement. He loved this. Gee began to moan in happiness as we French kissed. So far, this was the best French kiss I had had with Gerard. When he pulled away he spoke.
“You have to promise me something, love.”
I stared at him. What more could he possibly want?
“You have to promise me that when we get home, to L.A, that you’ll do something for me…”
“And what’s that supposed to be?” I asked.
“That you finally come around to having s*x with me.”
I smiled and nodded. “I promise.”