FicWad

Changes Are No Good
By: Chibi
Chapter 3: "Strike the Fucking Match"

*

4AM

While the city slept, the gears of vengeance turned. Round, insectoid robots emerged from a secret hatch in uptown Emerald Park and took to the sky, their only goal to destroy. Soon the famous skyline was alight with the flames of anger and pain, while a strange little man watched on stoically from a broken-down church. "Sorry, Central, but you need to be shaken up," St. Jimmy said with a bitter smile.

Central City was burning, and St. Jimmy had struck the match.

*

4:15AM

GUN Central Command was a maelstrom of activity when Commander Sonic had arrived, panting and wearing his uniform jacket, a worn Ramones shirt, and a pair of red and pink plaid flannel pajama pants. "I came as soon as I could. Sorry 'bout my appearance; I just grabbed the jacket and took off, then I had to fight my way past some 'bots," he apologized. He turned to the sleepy-looking blue cat. "Status, Eddie?"

"The city's on fire, and we're getting our asses kicked," Edina replied flatly.

Sonic swore. "Where's Lieutenant Saunders?"

"Currently en route, but she says it's slow-going," the cat told him. "She said she's trying to pass the Robotnik Corp. building, but there's a high concentration of Jimmy's 'bots there." She paused and pressed her headset to her ear. "She also says the security 'bots for the building have been deployed and... Shadow?! What the hell is Shadow doing there?!"

With a burst of light, a disoriented Saffron appeared in the commander's chair, dropping a cell phone on the floor in surprise. She got up, adjusted her glasses, smoothed out her uniform, made a half-hearted attempt to hide she was wearing a nightshirt under it, and picked up the phone. "Well," she finally said, "I was unaware he could use Chaos Control in this manner." She looked around. "Or with this degree of accuracy. I'm impressed."

The commander smiled. "He's had years of practice. Glad to see you're all right, Saff. What's it like out there?"

"Like Westopolis all over again," the hare said with a shudder. "Dr. Robotnik has begun activating security robots, so we should have back-up in that area shortly." She shook her head. "Believe me, it needs it too. It's like they want something from him..."

Sonic patted her shoulder. "Thanks, Saff. Take your post." He turned to face the rest in the station. "All right, everyone, let's-"

"Sir!" Horrocks interrupted, looking at his monitor. "There's a large contingent of robots headed straight our way!"

"So he is after us," the commander mused. "All right, the doc should be able to handle himself out there, so..." He made a wide, sweeping gesture out in front of him. "Whoever's out in the city is to stay there and defend the civilians! Everyone else, prepare to defend Central Command! Let's show this guy what we're made of!"

*

4:21AM

Secretary of State Jason Emyr had woken up to many strange things during his years in politics. He had been in office as the President of the United Federation during the Chaos incident in Station Square, the ARK incident, and the Black Arms invasion. He was part of the Cabinet when the Doom's Evangelists went on the attack. He had seen doom, salvation, and wacky hijinks many, many times.

However, all this still failed to prepare him for the surprise of a giant, shiny, black beetle-like robot crashing through his bedroom wall. He did what any reasonably sane person would do in a time like this: he yelped and threw his alarm clock at the robot.

The robot paused as if it was dumbfounded by the human's actions and quietly beeped. A muffled male voice exclaimed, "GANGWAY!", barely giving Jason enough time to jump out of bed and hug the wall before the robot went flying across the room. A large gray albatross smelling of booze, smoke, and God-knows-what else came in through the hole in the wall, holding a rolled-out ladder. "You Mr. Emyr?" Stupified, the human nodded. "Good, the boss is waitin' for ya." He paused and made a Winnie the Pooh-esqe thinking pose. "Oh, and what was it he said to say? Batman? No, it was a girl... Batgirl?" He snapped his fingers. "Oh, right! 'Rouge sent us'!"

"Rouge?" Jason repeated, still in an adrenaline and half-awake daze. Rouge good, the back of his mind noted, Rouge help when me President.

"The boss is waitin'," the albatross said, gesturing to the ladder.

"R-right," Jason said.

*

4:30AM

At the surprisingly modest two-floor home of Ivo Robotnik in north Central City, a valiant fight was underway. Former Commander Ansem was pegging robots from an upstairs window with a shotgun nabbed from what Shadow brought of his collection, as Amy fought them on the ground outside. Maury, having no fighting ability whatsoever, was left with the ex-commander, a fact that Gordon was silently cursing.

"Ooo! There's another one coming!" the hedgehog boy exclaimed as he looked out one of the windows. "I can't believe this is happening again! This is so exciting!"

Gordon sighed irritatedly. At the rate things were going, he'd be out another home because of St. Jimmy, and this child was bouncing around like it was some damned TV show. "This isn't a game, kid, and stay out of the windows! You'll attract their attention!"

"And mom smashing things in a nightgown won't attract attention?" Maury said, watching a pair of robots appear to flee from his mother.

The former soldier stopped for a second, looked at the boy, then turned his attention to reloading the shotgun. "Good point." He paused. "Your father's a lucky man."

It took Maury a second to put two and two together. He scrunched up his face and stuck out his tongue upon realization. "Ew, that's my mom you were ogling!"

Gordon shrugged. "So?" He scanned the skies for any more invaders. "Looks like they're clearing out. Don't let your guard down yet, though." The boy's only reply was a strange, strained noise, setting off alarms in the older man's head. He turned to look to see Maury staring straight at a robot on the other side of the window. One motorized arm of the machine had made its way inside the open window and was reaching out for the boy.

As Gordon started to aim, a strange thing happened. Several points of green light appeared before the stammering young man, getting brighter and multiplying until he finally shouted, "GET AWAY FROM ME!" Needle-thin darts of green light passed seemingly harmlessly through the window and the machine. Then, without warning, the machine exploded, shattering the window and scorching the building's siding. Maury brought an arm up to shield his face from the explosion, then lowered it to see just what he had done.

The ex-commander and young hedgehog looked on in surprise and confusion for several long moments, until the latter threw his fists in the air and exclaimed, "YES! I have freaky alien powers too! COOL!" The boy then proceeded to do a spastic little victory dance.

Gordon put a hand over his face. So much for finally getting away from weird hedgehogs after retirement, he thought.

*

4:47AM

"Status report!" Sonic ordered, pointing to the blue cat with one hand and bringing his other hand down hard on the flat surface before him.

"We're all going to die," Edina stated flatly. "He caught us with our pants down, reinforcements aren't getting here fast enough, and the latest Big Foot models aren't strong enough to fight swarms like this on their own."

"Oh, we are not all going to die!" Saffron countered hotly. "Their numbers are thinning!"

"Not fast enough," the cat replied. She glanced at the screen before her. "And apparently Dr. Prower wants to go down fighting. I heard stories about his skill with a turret, but honestly..."

"Tails?!" the commander squeaked. "Saff, take command! I'm going out!" he ordered before breaking into a run out of the command center."

"Sir! Wait!" Saffron called out after him.

Edina sighed. "He's not going to listen. Not when it's one of them on the line." The hare turned partway to look at her. "Eyes on the screen, ma'am. I'll tell you later. Right now, let's try not to end up dead."

Saffron nodded. "Right." She turned to the skinny human next to her. "Horrocks, try to contact Dr. Robotnik. I have a plan..."

*

4:48AM

"All right, start falling back. They live for today," St. Jimmy commanded.

*

4:49AM

"Put me down, Sonic! I can fight just as well as anyone else! You know that!" the fox yelled, freshly pulled away from the turret and being carried away by the commander.

"You're not a combatant!" Sonic yelled back, "And I am not letting you get hurt or worse by being somewhere you shouldn't be! Especially when you have a little girl to look after!"

"I've been a combatant since I was a kid! You should know; you were there!" Tails countered, trying to wrest himself free from the speeding hedgehog's grasp. "I can handle myself!"

The doors shut heavily behind them. Sonic set him down. "I know that!" he shouted, then repeated softly, "I know that, Tails. It's just..." He pulled the fox into a tight hug and said, voice high and strained, "I almost lost you once, kid. I don't want anything to..."

Tails hesitantly hugged back. "You never really got over that, did you?" A soft shake of the hedgehog's head. "But I got not only myself, but Knuckles out of there too. Sonic, the situation's desperate out there; you need all the help you can get out there. I'll be OK."

The engineer tried to pull away, but Sonic wasn't budging. "No."

"But GUN..."

"Fuck GUN. I'm not..." The explosions outside got louder and more frequent. The commander let go and turned to the door. "What the hell?!"

*

4:52AM

"Fly! Fly, my pretties! Ohohoho!" Ivo exclaimed to his robots from his trademark hovering vehicle.

Shadow resisted the urge to facepalm and continued reloading his firearm. "You are never allowed to be within 20 feet of 'The Wizard of Oz' again, doctor."

*

4:53AM

Saffron cackled madly at the news. "Reinforcements are here! Hit those fuckers with everything we've got, people! This one's for the home team!"

Edina rolled her eyes. The hare was entirely too much like the commander sometimes. "Red Squadron, there's still some coming from the rear..."

*

6:00AM

Back in north Central City, Dr. Robotnik finally returned home with his hedgehog cousin of sorts leaning heavily on him. Gordon immediately set aside the gun he was cleaning and Amy rushed forward to meet her husband. "Shadow! Are you all right?" the woman asked.

"Just fine," Shadow replied. He let go of the doctor, took a few steps, and fell into her arms. "Or will be as soon as the room stops spinning."

Ivo looked down at the hedgehogs. "I'm amazed you were capable of walking, with what you did out there."

The pink hedgehog looked at Ivo and hugged her husband tighter. "What exactly did he do?"

Ivo said, counting each item off on his fingers. "First, he brought the both of us to my corporate headquarters, teleports-from what I could tell-a fairly high-ranking GUN officer to presumably Central Command, guarded the building while I was getting the Eggknights online when it was being overrun by those inferior models, then after we were contacted by GUN for assistance there, he-"

Shadow raised a hand and weakly laughed. "I tried to see how many of those bugs I could take out in one go without hurting the GUN soldiers. Turns out it's a lot."

"He dropped like a rock after that, however," the doctor added.

"Desperate times, doctor..." the dark hedgehog countered. He steadied himself and tried to walk away. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to get ready for work."

He found himself grabbed by his wife and the doctor, who respectively said "Like hell!" and "Absolutely not!" at the same time.

"But the children..." Shadow tried to explain.

"The people at the Mariel Bloom Child Care Center will understand if you miss a day," Amy told him. He opened his mouth to protest, but she cut him off before he could speak. "And no buts! You have your limits too, whether you'll admit them or not! You are staying, and that's final!"

Shadow sighed and leaned against her. "I'm not going to win here, am I?"

His wife smiled sweetly and stroked his quills. "Have you ever won against me, Cupcake?"

Ivo couldn't help but chuckle at the pair as they started up the stairs. "Good, then that's settled." His eyes went to the ex-commander. "Gordon."

Gordon nodded. "I'll get on it soon. I'll need a little time; if that's,"-(he gestured to the footage playing on TV)-"any indication, my contact will be busy for a while." He paused. "Are you going to contact Rouge, or should I?"

"You do it," the doctor said. "I'm going to put some proper pants on and continue assisting the clean-up effort." He muttered under his breath, "To think I'm going to be on the 7'oclock news in an old bathrobe..."

Gordon gave him a look. "You can't let your robots handle things on their own?"

Ivo shook his head. "Whenever I make an AI that sophisticated, they either try to kill me, lock me up and try to take over the world in my place, or inexplicably fall in love with the enemy and side against me. I'm in no rush to try making one again."

The ex-commander reached for the gun he had set aside. "Then you're not going alone."

Ivo took off his glasses, pressed two fingers just above his nose in between his eyes, and sighed heavily. "Yes, I am. You're staying here. You're a target, remember?"

The ex-commander walked around the couch and to the doctor. "I'm not here to hide, and, considering what went on today, you look like you're a target yourself."

The doctor replaced his glasses and poked the former commander in the chest with his index finger. "Don't let yourself be fooled by all this commotion. His goal wasn't to harm me, or this house and my company headquarters would be rubble instead of mildly singed. You're the one in any real danger at the moment."

Gordon pushed the doctor's finger away with the back of his hand. "And just what was the point of attacking those two places then?"

"I suspect these are why," Ivo replied. He produced a dark blue gem, a purple gem, and a clear gem, which gently levitated for a moment before going back where they came from.

Gordon blinked his mismatched eyes. "Are those...?"

"Chaos Emeralds. Correct," the doctor said with a nod. "I believe these are the reason for the attacks on my property."

The former commander crossed his arms. "First, you say there's a tie into all this that could get you arrested, and now you reveal you have Chaos Emeralds. What else are you hiding, Ivo?"

"Who's hiding what?" All eyes looked to the doorway connecting the room to the kitchen, where a very pink hedgehog boy in an apron several sizes too large looked up at them. "Does anyone want breakfast? I know I can't get to sleep now."

"I'm not hungry," Gordon replied, "Secrets make me lose my-Ivo?" He looked around the room to find that in the brief distraction, the doctor had up and gotten away. "How? When did he...?"

Maury tilted his head to one side. "Your Ivo? You mean dad's right and you two are dating?"

The ex-commander turned back to the hedgehog and gawked. "Your father thinks WHAT?!"

*

9:00AM

Commander Sonic returned to his apartment in east Central City. The day had barely started and already it was a circus. He had managed to escape by saying he wanted to get the rest of his uniform and ran as fast as his legs would carry him. He absently tossed his jacket on the loveseat and started taking off the pajama bottoms he had worn to work.

A muffled grunt was heard from the loveseat. A red echidna pulled the jacket off of his head, sat up, and blinked wearily. "Back so soon?" he asked. He watched the hedgehog for a moment. "Nice show."

Sonic froze for a moment, then finished taking off the pants and hugged the echidna. "Red! When did you get here?" A thought struck him. The attack. "Are you all right? You weren't attacked on the way here, were you?"

The echidna shook his head. "No, but I saw some of the fires." He thought he smelled smoke and oil on Sonic's shirt. "Were you attacked? You smell like you slept in a factory."

Knuckles could have sworn the hedgehog squeaked at that. Sonic ran a hand through his quills and said nervously, "Heheh, I had a little fight on the way to Central Command. Nothing to worry about, really." The echidna didn't look convinced. Sonic pressed his index finger to the end of the echidna's nose and smiled. "I'm all right. Nothing hurt, 'cept for maybe GUN's public image." The echidna relaxed a little. "Now," said the hedgehog, "did you bring it?"

"The emerald?" Knuckles asked. "Yeah, it's in my bag. What's going on, Sonic?"

Sonic lightly kissed him, then pulled away and tugged the shirt off. "Too much to explain now. I'll tell you when I can finally get away from there for the day. Right now, I need to get my uniform and go." He tossed aside the shirt and went to the bedroom. "So, how long you sticking around?" he called out while rummaging through his closet.

"Until Elly's ready to go back. I get the feeling it's not safe for her to travel alone right now." the echidna answered, picking up the uniform jacket. He gave it a funny look. Weird, he thought, It smells clean...

Sonic chuckled. "Not safe for the guy attacking the Federation," he said, emerging from the room buttoning his shirt. "You shoulda seen what the girl did to a 'bot in Rosetta. Tails is grateful she at least left a few identifying pieces unbroken, unlike the one Amy got to." He took the gray jacket and put it on, leaving it open. "I gotta get going. If you go anywhere while I'm out, be careful and remember to lock the door." He lightly tugged on a beaded dreadlock and grinned. "Later, Red!"

The echidna watched the hedgehog leave and picked up the clothes same hedgehog carelessly left on the floor. Something's wrong... But he can fix it, right? He looked at the smoky clothing in his hands. Right...?

*
End Chapter 3

Chibi's notes:

Something's rotten in Denmark...

Subtext is fun. Flat out text is fun too. Storm as a strip club bouncer entertains me. And Maury and Edina are plain fun to write. XD

And no, the last bit about Eggman's failed AIs isn't game canon; I just thought it was funny.

Sonic et. al. are owned by Sega. I'm just borrowing them.