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We just got here Elle." Gerard said bluntly. Mikey looked over at the mess of flowers I was still clutching in my hand.

"Where'd ya get the flowers from?" Mikey said snickering at them a little. They were pretty beat up at this point. After being shoved around so much.

"I don't know." I said looking at Gerard hoping he couldn't hear the fear in my voice. But he could see it in my eyes. I could tell by the way he was looking at me with such concern.

"Wait these were on your porch again?" He says raising his eyebrow slightly. I nodded a little and he frowned. He went over to look, look at what I don't know... There was nothing to look at.

"Frankie if you're fucking around with me I swear!" I say waving my fist at him.

"Elle!" he laughed. "I don't know what you're talking about!' Frankie laughed as Gerard came walking back.

"Aw come on Frankie 'sorry you didn't get to see me dance!'" I yell at him. I couldn't help it. I was getting upset. They had to be from Frankie... They just had to...

"Dance?" Frankie says like he doesn't know what the fuck I'm talking about.

"Elle I asked him he doesn't even know-" Gerard started but I interrupted him talking over him a little. I was just so pissed.

"Yeah DANCE!' I shriek. "At the fucking strip club!"

"He doesn't know about that Elle." Gerard said cringing a little.

"What?!" Frankie yells out excitedly.

"Well now he does." Gerard sighs softy as Frankie jumped up out of the car charging towards me a little.

"You fucking stripped!" he hollered so loud I swear the neighbors had to hear him. I hushed him a little and tried to explain what happened as we all walked down the block.

"So they had to be from someone who knew you were there but didn't see you 'dance'" Mikey says matter-of-factly. I roll my eyes a little.

"You think?" I snap at him a little.

"Hey take it easy." Gerard says rubbing my arm a little.

"Take it easy?" I say widening my eyes at him. "Gerard you threw the flowers out last night remember. How the fuck did they get back on my porch?" I say biting my lip a little.

"Are you sure they were the same flowers?" Frankie asks scratching his head a little.

"What?" Gerard chuckles a little looking over at him.

"I mean maybe they were different flowers?" Frankie suggest. I frown. I know he was trying to help so I didn't say anything.

"No Frankie they clearly came from the trash." Mikey says sounding a little too excited. "Maybe if we examine the trash bag we can find a clue." He says his eyes lighting up a little as we walked into the school.

I looked over at Gerard like please do something...

"Okay bro uh... we'll catch up with you later." He says and they wave and walk off. Gerard opens my locker and helps me get my books and doesn't say anything so neither did I. My mind was still kinda racing..."Aw don't worry so much baby. I'll talk to Bob, he probably didn't mean to freak you out."

"Freak you out about what?" Bobs voice calls out behind me and I jump like six feet in the air. "Aw Elle did I scare ya?  I'm sorry." He says rubbing my shoulder a little.

"Yeah you scared me!" I said getting a little upset again. "What the fuck did you leave that on my porch for?" I say looking hard at him.

He looked back at me blankly. "Leave what on your porch?" He says with out taking his eyes from mine.

"Fucking flowers Bob!" I say biting my lip a little. "You sent me flowers right?" I say already knowing the answer...

He shook his head no and smiled a little. "Why would you think that I sent you flowers Elle?" He says and glances over at Gerard quickly and then looks back at me.

"Well some one sent her flowers yesterday." Gerard says plainly like it was no big deal. "We're just trying to figure out who."

"Oh and you figured cause I'm her husband that I fucking did it..." Bobs voice trailed off a little as he saw my eyes welling up with tears.

"Elle... its okay." Gerard says pulling me close to him and wrapping his arm around me.

"What the hells going on?" Bob says getting a little agitated.

"I'll tell you later...I gotta go." I said as the bell rang. I gave Gerard a quick kiss and left him and Bob standing in the hallway as I went into the home ec room.

I climbed up on to the stool in front of my table and sat swinging my legs a little. I looked down at my shoes... I was wearing a skirt again. I love skirts; they just go better with my shoes. And what great shoes they were. I don't discriminate against people and I certainly don't discriminate against my shoes. Sure I have a lot of really expensive pairs of shoes but I also have a lot of not so expensive knock off shoes. And that's what these were. 14.99 from payless.. Gold mules with a stiletto style heel... I loved them...as I sat admiring them Paul must've come in cause I didn't notice him until he was a few feet away.

He was looking at my legs and when he saw that I saw him looking he fucking winks at me. I rolled my eyes and tried to ignore him as he sat down. He was saying something about being surprised the class room was still here that he figured I would've fucking burnt it down trying to cook by myself yesterday...

Burnt it down? Was that some kind of a joke? After everything that happened? I was too focused in my thoughts and I wasn't really listening to him and then something he said caught my ear. Something about sorry and dance...

I jumped off the stool and he smiled at me. "What the fuck did you just say?" I yell a little.

"Aw take it easy babe." He says smirking a little. "Its not the end of the world." He smirks a little.

"Paul what did you say?" I repeat grabbing his arm a little.

"Damn if I knew you were gonna be this upset I wouldn't have asked her." He says and I'm totally confused. "we could still hook up afterwards." He says reaching over and grabbing my waist a little. I smack his hand away. "Aw don't be like that Elle. you'll always be my girl, even if I'm not taking you to the dance" He says patronizing me a little.

"Wait you're what?" I say still trying to figure out what the fuck he was talking about.

"I told you I'm sorry I'm not taking you to the dance anymore on Friday, I got another date...Jessica." He says looking me over again. Waiting for me to what? React? I don't give a fuck who he goes with.... Fuck. That means it wasn't Paul who left the flowers either...If he knew what happened at the club he would've said something about it by now...

"What's the matter Elle." He says giving me a funny look.

"Nothing." I try to blow him off.

"Don't fucking give me that." He grumbles studying my face a little. "I fucking know you what's going on?" He says and I was tempted to tell him... Anytime I ever had a problem he always handled it for me. In a weird way I kinda liked how he was a bully... sometimes...

"Its nothing Paul." I say smiling fakely. He kept asking all period what was wrong. I didn't tell him. I could handle this myself... Handle what? There was nothing to handle...was there?... Fuck...

Class was over and Paul followed me out. He was walking with me actually. I looked over at him a little nastily. "Why are you following me?" I spat at him as we approached the cafeteria. Gerard was leaning in the doorway.

"He aint giving you trouble is he?" Paul says nodding towards Gerard. I know Gerard can hear him he's only like five feet away.

"Go to hell Paul." I say stepping towards the doorway.

"Why the fuck you following her around for?" Gerard says loudly with out moving.

"I'm not following her." Paul chuckles a little. 'I'm waiting for uh... Jessica!" he says as she comes up behind him. He smiled and grabbed her and pulled her face towards his and kissed her. Hard too. She wiggled at first and Gerard flinched like he was gonna pull her from him. But he didn't get a chance.

Mr. Bonner came up behind them. "Save it for after school" He says loudly and Paul lets her go, he whispered something to her before walking off snickering a little at Gerard. Jessica blushed a little and walked past Gerard into the cafeteria.

Gerard looked up at me. I shrugged a little. What did he want from me? I told him they were fucking around. Did he think she was really gonna stop cause he asked her to?

"Elle wait." He says pulling me into the corner. He had his back to Jessica. But I could see her. Sitting smugly at the table looking over. Waiting for what? For us to get in a fight over what just happened?" I don't want you to think that... ummm." He said searching for the right words.

"Its all right I get it." I say and he looked at me. "I get why you don't want her with him." I say and he gives me half a smile. "But you're not gonna be able to stop her Gerard." I say and his smile fades.

"Well maybe if you talk to her." He says and I laugh. He gives me a look and I cover my mouth apologetically. "Maybe if you explain the kinda guy he is she'd..." He carried on. I just shook my head a little as Mr. S appeared in the doorway. Gerard saw me looking and glanced over. "You've got to be fucking kidding me." He mumbles as Mr. S comes towards us.

"Miss Waller." He says and I don't move. "Come on lets go." He says holding up a slip. "You too Mr. Way." He says motioning at Gerard.

I don't know who was more confused. Me or Gerard. "Wait you want to talk to him too?" I say and he nodded. I looked at Gerard. His face was expressionless. 

We followed Mr. S down the hall to his office. No one spoke the whole way there... When we went in Mr. S told Gerard he could sit in the chair that was in the corner by the door. He motioned for me to sit in the chair I usually sit in and he sat behind his desk.

Gerard was behind me and kinda off to the side. I turned and looked over my shoulder at him. He shrugged and slouched back into the chair.

"So I thought that if it was okay with you Elle..umm that maybe he could observe our session." He says nodding towards Gerard.

"What?" I say a little confused.

"Well I know you have some 'concerns.' Hopefully this will alleviate some of them" He says looking over at Gerard. Gerard smirked a little at him.

"What?" I repeat looking at both of them. There was obviously something going on that I missed... I just didn't know what. "What do you mean?" I say turning back to Mr. Samuel.

"I thought this would be a good way to settle some of the concerns Gerard expressed to Principal Bonner during detention yesterday." Mr. S said looking over at him. Oh god he didn't! I look over at Gerard.

"Concerns?" Gerard sneers at him a little. "Oh you mean how I said I was concerned about how you spend so much time obsessing about her, pulling her in here everyday? Or concerned about the fact that you touched her skirt?" He said sitting up a little. "You know she's wearing one again today... You wanna touch her again?" He taunts him. "Or maybe you wanna watch while I touch her." He says snickering a little.

"Gerard!." I cry out in disbelief.

Mr. S shakes his head a little. "That's all right Elle." He says pulling his folder out."That's why I thought this would be helpful if he observes, as long as you're okay with it." He says and I nod and look back over my shoulder at Gerard.

He's still smirking a little. "Okay Elle." Mr. S says motioning for me to look back over at him.

I turn hesitantly and sit upright. Squeezing my knees together tightly. I slid my chair closer to the desk too. Mr. S opens up his folder.

"Aw not the fucking folder again." I moan.

Mr. Samuel laughed lightly and picked up his pencil. "So where did we leave off..." He said scanning over what ever was written.

"You were gonna find me someone who knew my mom." I say leaning forward a little.

"You were gonna read the book I gave you." He says tapping his pencil on the folder a little.

"Yeah." I say and nod a little.

"So...you're telling me you read the entire book." He says raising his eyebrows at me.

"No I kinda thumbed through it. I got the general idea... you know love yourself.. blah blah blah." I bullshit him. I never even opened the book. I think I left it on the porch too. I don't remember where I put it.

Mr. Samuel leant forward a little. "Elle" He sighed and glanced over at Gerard. "I umm gave you that book cause I thought it would help you." He says and I look at him blankly. "I really wished you would've read through it." He says and I start feeling a little guilty. "You know I bought that book with my own money for you and where is it now?" He says and I look down. "You lost it didn't you?" He says and I look up a little surprised.

"How did you know that?" I say a little surprised.

"Its written all over your face Elle." He says reaching into his drawer and pulling out another book.

"Do you want me to pay you back for it?" I say reaching for my purse.

"No no Elle" He laughs a little. "Just take this one and be more careful. Promise you're gonna read through it." He says and I nod. I felt so bad losing his book like that. I glanced at the back cover as I slipped it into my bag. $29.95?

Fuck being a lesbian is expensive...
 
"So why don't you tell me what you were doing that you didn't read my book." He says and I look over at Gerard. "Is it something you don't want to discuss in front of..." He says looking over too.

"No I was with him yesterday." I say and Gerard shifted in his chair a little.

"Oh I see." Mr. S says sitting back a little.

"He was helping me clean up." I say trying to fill the silence. "Umm we did laundry and um... he took out the trash and I umm swept up the vase that broke..."

"You broke a vase?" Mr. S interrupts.

"No Gerard did." I said and he motions for Gerard  to pull his chair closer.

"Were you guys fighting?" He says and Gerard smirks. I started remembering how we found it there after school... It wasn't there at lunch...And I don't know that it was there when I went to bring Mikey and Frankie home either cause I didn't go in... "Is that how it got broken Elle?" Mr. Samuel says loudly startling me. "You were fighting and Gerard broke it." He says and I shake my head no.

"No why would you think that?" I shook my head a little and looked over at Gerard like this is the fucking kind of insanity that I have to deal with...

"I'm only asking cause you seem to be getting upset thinking about it Elle." Mr. S says and Gerard reaches over and takes my hand. Mr. S scribbled something down.

"I'm upset cause some one sent me flowers." I blurt out and Gerard winced a little. I guess he didn't want me to tell him.

"So public displays of attention bother you." He says scribbling again.

"No that's not what I'm saying..." I say getting a little frustrated. I looked over to Gerard for some help.

"What the fuck is in there?" Gerard says getting up and leaning over and peeking in the folder. Mr. Samuel shut it quickly as the bell rang. "Come on Elle. Lets go." He says grabbing my arm.

Gerard pulled me out a little. He seemed a little frustrated himself.

"What was in his folder Gerard?" I asked as we walked down the hall.

"I don't know a bunch of scribbles..." He says thinking a little.

"Gerard what is it?" I say and he just looked at me. "Fucking tell me." I say punching his arm a little.

"Nothing its just... your name and address was written at the top..."