Categories > TV > Dead Like Me > Distractions


by Chaimera 8 reviews

What do you do when a building falls on you and Daisy has locked you out of the apartment? You go to Mason's place. Duh. what you do after that, however, is another story!

Category: Dead Like Me - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Drama, Romance - Published: 2006-04-17 - Updated: 2007-08-12 - 3933 words - Complete

Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Like Me or any of the characters associated with it. In fact I don't own anything. I live in a box. To sue me would be excruciatingly pointless. Thank you.

Just a one shot, in George's pov. It is a George+Mason fic. If ya don't like it, don't read. Well here ya go folks, my first DLM fan fic. Review please.


By Chaimera

I'm George Lass.

You, of course all ready know that. And if you know that, it also means that you know I'm dead. Well, un-dead if we are to be politically correct, but I'm not alive so I really don't care much about that anymore.

Not that I ever did anyway. Now in my short after life, I've learned a few things. So far, don't break the rules, apparently that's a given, go figure. Any way, don't fall for schizophrenic boys, who are about to die, don't try to extort the dead's money and, this goes for any girl anywhere, for god's sake don't get a crush on a work mate who likes someone else. Right now, I'm sitting right beside said un-requited crush. Who while trying to score some 'quality' time with his crush, is eating my breakfast, and trying to steal my purse.

I slap Mason's hand away from my bag, which is slung over my lap. "Steal from someone who doesn't need it!"

He reaches across me causing me to lean back for fear of trying to kiss him then and there, and grabs another piece of fruit from my bowl. He leans back, giving me a wolfish smile and pops the fruit in his mouth.

"What? Like, someone who's dead? Thought you didn't agree with that sort of thing, Georgie girl."

"Whatever." I roll my eyes at him and turn to Rube, my boss so to speak. But I'm sure you already know that too.

"Hey could you just gimmie the post-it so I can leave. If I'm late again, I'm gonna be fired."

This is a lie. For some inexplicable reason, the universe has deemed it necessary for Deloris Herbig-great-prying-nose to befriend me in my after life. Which just makes it three times as painful as it already is, but it does keep me from unemployment.

Rube raises a sceptical eyebrow, but opens his notebook of fate and slaps down my post-it. Correction......

"Two? Why do I get two?"

Rube smirks slightly. I just know he likes to torture me.

"We had one extra today Peanut. You drew the short straw."

Well I sure as hell don't remember any straws. "I busy today, let someone else take it."

"Well.." Said Mason, standing up a little too quickly and knocking over his glass. "..I've got to go. Um...bye."

One down.

Daisy scowled and dabbed at a mark the spilled drink had left. "My new Gucci jacket too." She griped reaching for the napkins. Roxy snorted into her meal and looked up. "Yeah, that would be a big loss, if it weren't fake."

Daisy threw a 'You party crashing bitch' look Roxy's way, who as usual ignored her.

I smiled inwardly, as I slid out of the booth and waved good bye to occupants. I always like to see Daisy humiliated, even if its only something small like that. It makes me feel like there is some justice in the world. After all, she has completely taken over my apartment, insults me when ever she can, and to top it all off she's got Mason's attention.

And just when I was getting somewhere too.

I glance at the post-it's stuck to my hand. The first one was in half an hour. O.k. so I'm gonna be late for work. Again. They'll manage. I turn off my usual rout to work and head towards the financial district. There is along grassy stretch of what can only be described as a wannabe park. In fact, this was where I died. I stop to reminisce. I even look up into the sky, just like I did on that day.

Man, did that day suck.

Rube and Mason always complained about my attitude, Daisy said I was internal, and Roxy....well she didn't say anything really. But considering how I died AND the fact I didn't get to move on, I figure I have good grounds to be seriously pissed off for at least.....oh 10 years.

I sigh and pick up pace, noticing that I only have 15 minuets left. I glance at the appointment again "D.C Manning 17th Floor 5th and Park E.T.D 10:09" The list of company's at the entrance of the building just helped confirm that I was in the right place. The office was small and neat with obligatory plants and sofas which I sat on, waiting impatiently for death to come.

10:08 A tall, dark haired man steps out of the elevator, followed by one giddy looking graveling. The secretary stuffed her nail fail into her drawer hurriedly and picked up a stack of files

"Mr. Manning, these came in this morning." He nodes dismissively and continues on. I

sigh and walk towards the elevator, brushing into him as I pass. I feel the now all to familiar chill that runs up my fingers as I pop this poor workaholics soul. I slip on my sunglasses as I exit the building, just in time to see one D.C Manning hit the pavement and get turned to mulch. Glancing upwards, I see the graveling dart out of the window and disappear in that poofy, smoky thing, they do. I watch as D.C Manning looks at his former body with disgust.

He turns as I tap him on the shoulder. "Listen I got a job to get to and I think that's your ride so...." I motion towards the big glowing office block that just materialised down the street. He looks at me briefly before entering the building and disappearing. Huh, not even a thank you. Well anyone that sees work as heaven has got one sick mind.

Speaking of work I head off in the general direction of Happy Time.


I stare at the clock on my office desk, waiting for my lunch 'hour' to arrive.

"Millie.......Millie." I turn in my chair to Deloris who's looking at me expectantly.


"Are you busy for lunch."

This is about the 50th time she's asked me that. I'm struggling to come up with an excuse when I see Mason across the office floor.

"Oh, I'd love to but I've got plans with my friend." Deloris nodes uncertainly and I can tell she's going to go into one of her 'I know where you are' speeches when Mason spots me.

"Hey Georgie, you busy?" I shake my head in disbelief. I didn't know it was possible for one guy to be so stupid at times. He spots Deloris looking between us, with a puzzled expression and he straightens up slightly.

"Um Deloris, this is Mason, my friend."

Mason smiles and nods to her. "Yeah me and Millie are best pals."

Oh now he remembers.

He turns back to me. "So you busy?"

I shake my head and follow him towards the elevators. In said lift we're alone and I hit him on the arm.

"Ow. What was that for?"

I glare at him. "Well for one thing you are not supposed to be here. And could you at least try to remember my work name?"

He shrugs and grins at me "I did remember it."

I roll my eyes at him again "Took you long enough. So, what are you doing here?"

"Well my guys at a restaurant a block away, and I thought you and I could spend some quality lunch time together."

I know there's a catch here somewhere. He turns to me as we step out of the elevator.

"Oh, but your going to have to pick up the check. I'm skint."

I knew it.

I give him another hit for good measure, but went anyway. Lunch with Mason's better than lunch with no one. Well it was lunch with Mason after all. see what this stupid crush is doing to me.


"Well that was new." Comments Mason as we both stare at the crowd of people who have surrounded the body like it was some kind of fair ground attraction.

I pick at my fries and glance at the accident and decide it was a bad idea to come after all. Mason continues the one sided conversation.

"How stupid do you have to be, to get killed by a garbage crusher. Don't people know not to put their heads near those things. Think of the bacteria festering in there."

I give him an amused smile "Well, I suppose you have to about as stupid to drill a hole in your head, so you shouldn't talk."

He gives me a disgruntled look, like a kid and I've just taken his candy. It was really cute.

"Well, your death wasn't so pretty either Toilet Seat."

I flush slightly at the use of my unflattering nickname.

"Maybe, but I didn't do it on purpose." I smirk at him and throw the money owed on the table.

"Don't steal the tip." I say over my shoulder as I walk out the door, smug in my victory.

He runs up and falls into pace beside me. "Well at least I know how to have some fun. Unlike you."


"Oh, you think your so smart, but you just wait."

I slide my eyes in his direction ever so slightly. "Oh really. What, pray tell, are you going to do?"

He slings an arm around my waist and drags me closer to him as we walk. "I have my plans."

We stop in front of the Happy Time office block and I turn to face him. His arm is still firmly placed around my waist but all this close contact is getting a little too much for me.

I quickly extract myself from his grasp and step back. "" I jerk my thumb in the buildings direction. "....gotta go to work."

He frowns at my stuttered explanation but before he can say anything I hurry into the building.

I thunk my head off my desk. Yeah, way to be cool George. Now he probably thinks I hate him.

"Are you alright Millie?" I look up at Deloris and nod my head.

"Oh, just fine." I say unconvincingly. She steps inside my cubicle, despite my assurances I'm fine.

"Boy trouble?" She asks sympathetically.

You see what I mean? Her-big-great-prying-cant keep out of my business-nose. I smile fakely and shake my head.

"Really everything's fine."

"Well ok, but if you ever need any advice.."

"I'll keep you in mind." She gives me a satisfied look and heads off to ambush some other unsuspecting soul.


I pull on my jeans and a comfortable sweater. God damn Rube giving me a 1am appointment.

"Daisy, I'm going out. Don't lock the door tonight."

I hear a noise from the bath room which I hope is an affirmative, cause I really don't feel like sleeping on the street tonight. I look at the post-it.

The location was a warehouse on the outskirts of town. Which would be fine during the day, but at the dead of night, it only meant one thing, crime.

Which in turn meant guns, knifes and the occasional bomb.

As I walked down the near deserted street I was seriously considering calling Rube or even Mason. Just for company you understand. Well, Mason anyway.

I'd already dropped into Der Waffelhaus to see if Rube would tag along. Alas he said he was busy.

Busy eating waffles.

The warehouse was quiet and dark. Except for the two guys arguing rather loudly by the main door. Well that wasn't hard. "Jesus Joe, just go in set the charge and blow the fucking door off."

Oh great, I got the occasional bomb.

The younger of the two, Joe had sandy hair and didn't look much older than me. Well you know what I mean. This one entered the building cautiously and disappeared into the dark interior. Which left one, who must be R. Granger. Question was how I was going to able to get anywhere near him to pop his soul. He paced around restlessly waiting for his companion to reappear. As I watched him do this I came to a decision. I'd come back an hour later and take his soul after he died.

Spying his gun I really didn't feel like being shot. Not that it could do anything to me. I cant die again, but still I like to leave the getting shot up to Mason. After all it still hurt.

I turn quietly to leave but I jump when I hear the guy shout. "Who's there? Hey come out!"

This guy has ears like a bat. I start to leave, quickly.

Unfortunately this guy is quicker. He grabs my arm and spins me around roughly. "Who the fuck are you?"

I just mouth wordlessly at him and since he's the one holding on to me I take the opportunity to pop his soul. That job done, hopefully I can get out of this without too much pain. As you've probably guessed by now I'm not a pain person. He shakes me hard making my teeth clack together. "Answer me."

"Me? I'm no one. Didn't see a thing." I smile nervously at him, but he doesn't buy it.. He drags me back towards the building and throws me against the wall before going to checking the building for the other guy.

OW! That really fucking hurt. I hope this guy gets a particular nasty death. I'm shocked to find myself thinking it. I've always found myself wishing that I could save the person.

R. Granger exits the building gun in hand. "He's gone. The fucking cock sucker blew out on me!"

I inch away slightly, trying to avoid the frantic waving of the gun. "Where do you think your going?" I stop and look at him. "Well, you see, I didn't see a thing so I thought I'd just go home and....."

He hits me in the face with the butt of his gun and I fall to the ground. "Your not going any where bitch."

That fucking bastard. He better die horribly or I'll be especially pissed. I see a graveling scuttle into the building and make to get up and leave.

Through past experience, I know that gravelings and explosives don't mix well. In fact just as I make it to my feet we both hear a loud boom and the building starts to crumble.

Well that's my exit que. I start to run, and I plan to get as far away as possible but unfortunately this guy wants me to stay with him. He grabs my leg a and we both go down as I try to shake him off I look up and see a lot of debris falling towards us, and I say what I always do in these situations.

"Oh shit."


Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!!! Shit, that hurt.

I lift my head and taste the metallic tint of blood in my mouth. I haven't been out that long because the emergency services haven't arrived yet and I'm pretty sure a large explosion warrants one fire engine at least. As I make to get up I feel my left leg trapped under.....something.

That something turns out to be R. Granger, and a big hunk o' building. After some painful pulling I manage to get free. Maybe it starts to hurt less the longer your dead, 'cause I saw Mason get shot in the head and keep on running. You can bet all your money I wasn't going anywhere fast. I hear sirens in the distance and decide to limp away while I still can.

"What the fuck?" The outraged question comes from behind me, and I know it well, having died once myself. I turn to see R. Granger, eyes popping out of his head.

I sigh and address him. "Hey, yeah dead guy!" It takes him a minute to realise I'm talking to him and when he does he's not pleased.

"Why am I dead and your not bitch?"

I glare at him coldly. "One, don't call me bitch and Two, you died 'cause you're an asshole."

A light starts up from behind him and he whirls around. Looks like his rides here.

It was different this time though. There was no calm blue light and eerie silence as the dearly deceased ran happily towards their own personalised paradise. Here there was no choice. He was dragged kicking and screaming into his own hell.

It's an image I don't think I'll ever forget.

No chance of sleeping tonight then.


I feel worse than ever as I limp up the crappy stairs to apartment looking forward to a nice restless night on my couch. I bang on the door and when I receive no answer shout and bang some more.

"Daisy? Daisy let me in!!" Still no answer. The door across the hall opens and an old lady sticks her head out. I say head, but in reality she looks like a stale raisin. Six packs-a-day voice and skin the texture of leather. And when the door opens you get the aroma of cat piss. Delightful.

"Shut up. Some of us need our beauty sleep you know!!"

"Sorry Mrs. Lokavitz." But she's slammed the door before I could get the first syllable out.

What the fuck was I going to do now.

I could go to Rube's.

I don't even know where Roxy lives, and she'd never let me stay anyway. I thunk my head against the door frame and wince as I remember my beat up status. That left only one alternative. Masons latest place wasn't that bad. The house, when I'd last been there had been moderately clean and it had had a good sized sofa. Perfect, for only one problem.

Mason opened the door slightly wearing a pair of faded jeans and an old t-shirt. Bleary eyed , but started at the sight of me. Well I wasn't going to look my preened beast after my night now was I?

"Jesus George, what the hell happened?" He asks as he moves aside, granting me entrance. He must have seen my limp, because after he closes the door he slips an arm under mine and helps me through the hall. I try to smile at him but my split lip doesn't help so I just say quietly


He sits me down on the sofa and smiles back. "No problem. Always nice to have a pretty girl drop in at night."

I would have blushed but I was too tired.

He walks into the kitchen and shouts out. "So, what did happen?"

"Building fell on me."

He came back out holding a pack of frozen peas. "I had a building fall on me once. Took 'em three days to dig me out. And only one copy of Playboy to keep me company too."

I smile weakly and look at the peas he handed me. "What about reaper metabolism?"

"Makes it go even faster." I nod and put the pack to my swollen lip and cheek.

"Why aren't you home?"

"Daisy locked the door and couldn't hear my banging. Unlike the rest of the building."

Mason sat down in a chair across from me and frowned.

"What?" He was making me uncomfortable.

"Suppose the building punched you too?"

I sigh "My appointment was handy with the but of a gun."

He frowned again "You should have called me. Or Rube, or Roxy. Anyone."

"I'm touched and I did ask Rube, but he said he was busy. Besides, aside from the being hit and the falling building it was all fine."

My voice broke at the end of the sentence as I thought about the guy being dragged into hell or where ever it was.

I am not going to cry. I am not going to cry.

It's a common mantra these days and it rarely works. So nothing different this time then. I curse softly as tear leaks out.

Mason crosses the room and sits beside me. "Hey, what happened? Really."

He cups my cheek with his hand and rubs away the tear with his thumb.

Gee, when he's not stoned he's really sweet.

So I tell him, about everything. And I mean everything. It was like I opened a gate. When I was done he hugged me and told me some stuff about himself. I doubt it was everything. He has a lot more to tell, but we'll get there one of these days. I curled up on the couch and in his arms and actually got one a good nights sleep since, well when I died.

When I wake up I blink against the sunlight streaming in through the sunlight. I can feel Masons arm draped over me. I turn slightly to look at him and realise he's awake.

I smile. A proper smile. I can feel my face is back to normal. "Morning."

He doesn't answer me, just continues to look at me as if trying to arrive at some conclusion.

"Wha.." I begin to speak but he leans in an kisses me. Just like that. Not that I mind, but you think he might have asked. I close my eyes and lean into the kiss and just when we were getting some where he pulls back.

Hey what's the big idea?

"Do you mind?"

Oh now he asks. But I smile, like I'm gonna turn him down now. I shake my head and he kisses me again. More passionate this time. I think I've passed over.

He rolls over slightly and my leg hits of the side table and I yelp in pain. It obviously isn't back to normal yet.

"Sorry." He apologises and sits up pulling me up with him causing my leg to hit off the coffee table in front of the sofa. I bite back a whimper of pain as he cringes.

"Sorry." He kisses me lightly on the head. "Maybe later."

He gets up and heads for the kitchen but I grab his sleeve and pull him back down. I draw him near and kiss him deeply. "Definitely later."

He nods mutely and I giggle slightly. He blinks a bit and looks at me. "Since when did you giggle?"

"Hey I giggle and besides.." I voice something that's been on my mind since last night. "..I thought you didn't like me. You liked Daisy."

He shrugs. "Sure she's good looking, but I was distracted by you."

This time I blush. He gives me another wolfish smile, stands and scoops me up.

"Mason." I squeal slightly as he carries me towards the kitchen.

"What? And besides we want to make Rube feel real guilty about letting you go alone last night."

I raise an eyebrow. "Your going to carry me all the way to the Waffelhaus?"

He looks at me. "What kinda boyfriend would I be if I didn't help out my girl?"

I really like the sound of that.

"No problems here, lets go start a guilt trip."

This is going to be fun.


O.k., so I admit it. I am prone to attacks of fluffiness. Well I hope you like it anyway. Please review!!

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