Categories > Celebrities > Fall Out Boy > Parker Lewis Can't Lose But I'm Gonna Give It My Best Shot
I'm Still Alive But I'm Barely Breathing
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Parker’s POV
Still frantic from the dream I had I grabbed my keys and rushed towards the door still hoping Pete was at the beach. I couldn’t tell how fast I was driving but it was pretty fast. I started thinking about what I’m going to tell Pete but really there’s nothing I can tell him. I have no excuse for this no explanation just a apology a apology that I highly doubt he’ll except but can you blame him? I sure as hell can’t. Tears started to form in my eyes again. I’m so happy that was only a dream it all felt so real. Thank god it wasn’t I have no idea what I would do without Pete he’s my everything I love him with all of my heart.
All of sudden I heard a horn buzzing through my ears and a light blinding my sight of the road I heard my tires screech against the road. I felt my body shift towards the window and everything went blank from there.
Pete’s POV
Where is she? Our house isn’t that far from the beach. I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s with him right now. Fuck! I have to stop thinking like that I love my wife I love her with all of my heart I thought she loved me. Oh god what am I going to do?? I love this woman so much but she hurt me so badly. This is taking too long! I want to see her I want to talk to her I want to hold her in my arms and tell her everything is going to be okay but would I be lying to her? Will everything be okay in my marriage? I don’t know but I’ve decided I’m going to work things out with Parker or at least try to. I can’t wait anymore I’m going home she’s probably still there.
I got in my car and drove to my house oh great traffic thanks California. I looked out my window and saw an ambulance uh oh looks like someone got in an accident. I wonder if they’re okay? I sat in my car thinking of what I’m going to tell Parker. Thinking of what she’s going to tell me. All of sudden I felt my phone started to vibrate in my pocket it’s Patrick. Should I answer? I guess I could if I can forgive Parker I can forgive him.
“Hello?”
“Pete! Where are you?? Are you okay? Where’s Parker? Is she alright?!”
“Patrick slow down what’s going on?”
“Pete I I was w-was w-watching oh god-“ Patrick was breathing heavily it sounded like he was crying. What the hell is going on??
“Patrick just calm down tell me what’s wrong?”
“I was watching the news and and Parker she oh god I’m going to be sick!”
“Patrick! What happened to Parker??” I screamed as I started shaking.
“She got in a car accident!” He screamed while he cried harder.
I dropped the phone in shock. I felt my heart drop to my stomach tears formed in my eyes and then it hit me. I looked up at the ambulance in front of me. Please god please give me a sign please show me that Patrick got it wrong and the person in that ambulance isn’t Parker. I jumped out of my car and ran towards the ambulances and police cars that’s when I spotted a black Range Rover. Oh my god that that’s her car. Oh no! Oh god no! Tears streamed down my face while I held back the vomit that I was going to throw up. I reached where the wreckage was there was yellow tape everywhere. Two cops started pushing me away.
“Sir we need you to step away from here.” One of the police men said.
“No! No I can’t I I that’s that’s Parker that she’s my wife!” I yelled in between sobs.
The policemen shot hurt looks at each other took their arms off of me and let me through.
“Oh my god!” I screamed as I put my hands over my mouth. I couldn’t believe this! How did this happen?! Her car was toppled over on the side and the other car was upside down. I noticed the other driver was okay they were sitting in one of the ambulances getting checked out but Parker wasn’t as fortunate. I couldn’t even spot her. My heart still racing I ran up to one of the police men praying he knew anything about Parker being okay.
“I’m Pete Wentz that’s my wife in the black Range Rover please tell me she’s okay.” I said as more tears streamed down my face.
He looked at me disappointedly. “Mr. Wentz I’m sorry but she didn’t make it.”
“NO! No no no no no no! Are you sure?! Are you absolutely sure?!” I screamed while taking deep breaths from crying.
“Yes sir. I’m very sorry about your wife Mr. Wentz” He said as he put his hand on my shoulder.
I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know how to take this in. I don’t think I can. How do I go on without Parker? What do I do without Parker? I loved her so much and now she’s gone.
The next day
It’s been one whole day since Parker’s accident. Her family’s here old friends close friends pretty much everyone that cared for her which was a lot of people. Everyone loved Parker she was an amazing person sweet funny out going caring and she was mine. I didn’t sleep at all last night. Patrick stayed with me making sure I didn’t do anything drastic if he wasn’t I probably would’ve. Patrick’s the best friend anyone could ask for. He’s been helping me with everything. I feel bad for him too I knew he loved Parker I could tell by the way he looked at her the way his voice changed when he talked about her. Patrick knows exactly how I’m feeling right now.
“Are you ready to go Peter?” That was my mom my parents flew here from Chicago so did my brother and sister. I felt a little bit better knowing that my family’s here for me. My parents loved Parker too like I said everyone did.
“Yeah I just want to get this over with.” I mumbled.
I got into the car with my parents my brother my sister and Patrick. No one said a word on our way to the church. About thirty minutes later we got to the church it felt like forever. I looked up at the ceiling in the church it had angels and clouds painted on it. This was the same church Parker and I got married at. I looked around for Parker’s parents her mom was taking it the worst Parker never got along with her so her mother probably felt guilty. After everything was said and done I went to look at my wife one last time.
“I love you so much I always have and I always will. Parker sweetie I forgive you I know you never meant to hurt me and I’m sorry I wasn’t there enough. Goodbye Parker.” I cried as I kissed her cold lips and closed the casket.
After everyone said goodbye to Parker Patrick Parker’s brother cousin and I lifted her coffin into the hearse.
“I’m sorry about Parker Pete.” Andy said as he walked up to me and gave me a hug.
“Yeah so am I Andy.” I said as I sighed.
“We all loved her Pete she was an amazing person.” Joe said as he gave me a hug as well.
“She sure was.” I said as I tried to hold back tears.
We all left the church and headed towards the cemetery once we got there everyone expected me to say something about Parker. I know I should it’s just I know if I do it’s going to be hard for me but I did it anyway. The whole time I looked down at her tombstone.
“Parker was the most amazing person I knew she was sweet loving and funny there wasn’t one bad thing about her. Parker meant the world to me she meant that to a lot of people. She lit up a room she was beautiful inside and out. I love you Parker…. may she rest in peace.”
Still frantic from the dream I had I grabbed my keys and rushed towards the door still hoping Pete was at the beach. I couldn’t tell how fast I was driving but it was pretty fast. I started thinking about what I’m going to tell Pete but really there’s nothing I can tell him. I have no excuse for this no explanation just a apology a apology that I highly doubt he’ll except but can you blame him? I sure as hell can’t. Tears started to form in my eyes again. I’m so happy that was only a dream it all felt so real. Thank god it wasn’t I have no idea what I would do without Pete he’s my everything I love him with all of my heart.
All of sudden I heard a horn buzzing through my ears and a light blinding my sight of the road I heard my tires screech against the road. I felt my body shift towards the window and everything went blank from there.
Pete’s POV
Where is she? Our house isn’t that far from the beach. I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s with him right now. Fuck! I have to stop thinking like that I love my wife I love her with all of my heart I thought she loved me. Oh god what am I going to do?? I love this woman so much but she hurt me so badly. This is taking too long! I want to see her I want to talk to her I want to hold her in my arms and tell her everything is going to be okay but would I be lying to her? Will everything be okay in my marriage? I don’t know but I’ve decided I’m going to work things out with Parker or at least try to. I can’t wait anymore I’m going home she’s probably still there.
I got in my car and drove to my house oh great traffic thanks California. I looked out my window and saw an ambulance uh oh looks like someone got in an accident. I wonder if they’re okay? I sat in my car thinking of what I’m going to tell Parker. Thinking of what she’s going to tell me. All of sudden I felt my phone started to vibrate in my pocket it’s Patrick. Should I answer? I guess I could if I can forgive Parker I can forgive him.
“Hello?”
“Pete! Where are you?? Are you okay? Where’s Parker? Is she alright?!”
“Patrick slow down what’s going on?”
“Pete I I was w-was w-watching oh god-“ Patrick was breathing heavily it sounded like he was crying. What the hell is going on??
“Patrick just calm down tell me what’s wrong?”
“I was watching the news and and Parker she oh god I’m going to be sick!”
“Patrick! What happened to Parker??” I screamed as I started shaking.
“She got in a car accident!” He screamed while he cried harder.
I dropped the phone in shock. I felt my heart drop to my stomach tears formed in my eyes and then it hit me. I looked up at the ambulance in front of me. Please god please give me a sign please show me that Patrick got it wrong and the person in that ambulance isn’t Parker. I jumped out of my car and ran towards the ambulances and police cars that’s when I spotted a black Range Rover. Oh my god that that’s her car. Oh no! Oh god no! Tears streamed down my face while I held back the vomit that I was going to throw up. I reached where the wreckage was there was yellow tape everywhere. Two cops started pushing me away.
“Sir we need you to step away from here.” One of the police men said.
“No! No I can’t I I that’s that’s Parker that she’s my wife!” I yelled in between sobs.
The policemen shot hurt looks at each other took their arms off of me and let me through.
“Oh my god!” I screamed as I put my hands over my mouth. I couldn’t believe this! How did this happen?! Her car was toppled over on the side and the other car was upside down. I noticed the other driver was okay they were sitting in one of the ambulances getting checked out but Parker wasn’t as fortunate. I couldn’t even spot her. My heart still racing I ran up to one of the police men praying he knew anything about Parker being okay.
“I’m Pete Wentz that’s my wife in the black Range Rover please tell me she’s okay.” I said as more tears streamed down my face.
He looked at me disappointedly. “Mr. Wentz I’m sorry but she didn’t make it.”
“NO! No no no no no no! Are you sure?! Are you absolutely sure?!” I screamed while taking deep breaths from crying.
“Yes sir. I’m very sorry about your wife Mr. Wentz” He said as he put his hand on my shoulder.
I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know how to take this in. I don’t think I can. How do I go on without Parker? What do I do without Parker? I loved her so much and now she’s gone.
The next day
It’s been one whole day since Parker’s accident. Her family’s here old friends close friends pretty much everyone that cared for her which was a lot of people. Everyone loved Parker she was an amazing person sweet funny out going caring and she was mine. I didn’t sleep at all last night. Patrick stayed with me making sure I didn’t do anything drastic if he wasn’t I probably would’ve. Patrick’s the best friend anyone could ask for. He’s been helping me with everything. I feel bad for him too I knew he loved Parker I could tell by the way he looked at her the way his voice changed when he talked about her. Patrick knows exactly how I’m feeling right now.
“Are you ready to go Peter?” That was my mom my parents flew here from Chicago so did my brother and sister. I felt a little bit better knowing that my family’s here for me. My parents loved Parker too like I said everyone did.
“Yeah I just want to get this over with.” I mumbled.
I got into the car with my parents my brother my sister and Patrick. No one said a word on our way to the church. About thirty minutes later we got to the church it felt like forever. I looked up at the ceiling in the church it had angels and clouds painted on it. This was the same church Parker and I got married at. I looked around for Parker’s parents her mom was taking it the worst Parker never got along with her so her mother probably felt guilty. After everything was said and done I went to look at my wife one last time.
“I love you so much I always have and I always will. Parker sweetie I forgive you I know you never meant to hurt me and I’m sorry I wasn’t there enough. Goodbye Parker.” I cried as I kissed her cold lips and closed the casket.
After everyone said goodbye to Parker Patrick Parker’s brother cousin and I lifted her coffin into the hearse.
“I’m sorry about Parker Pete.” Andy said as he walked up to me and gave me a hug.
“Yeah so am I Andy.” I said as I sighed.
“We all loved her Pete she was an amazing person.” Joe said as he gave me a hug as well.
“She sure was.” I said as I tried to hold back tears.
We all left the church and headed towards the cemetery once we got there everyone expected me to say something about Parker. I know I should it’s just I know if I do it’s going to be hard for me but I did it anyway. The whole time I looked down at her tombstone.
“Parker was the most amazing person I knew she was sweet loving and funny there wasn’t one bad thing about her. Parker meant the world to me she meant that to a lot of people. She lit up a room she was beautiful inside and out. I love you Parker…. may she rest in peace.”
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