Categories > Anime/Manga > Chrono Crusade

The Weight Of Guilt

by quicksilvermad 3 reviews

"...the weight of his gaze added to the pressure on Chrno's chest and the devil had to wonder if guilt had the ability to kill..."

Category: Chrono Crusade - Rating: PG - Genres: Angst - Characters: Chrono, Remington, Other - Warnings: [!!] - Published: 2006-04-19 - Updated: 2006-04-19 - 759 words - Complete

TITLE: The Weight Of Guilt
AUTHOR: Quicksilvermad
SUMMARY: "...the weight of his gaze added to the pressure on Chrno's chest and the devil had to wonder if guilt had the ability to kill..."
GENRE: Angst
RATING: K+ (subject matter)
SPOILERS: Episode 23. If you haven't seen it yet and are terrified of spoilers, then you might not want to read this one.
DISCLAIMER: Daisuke Moriyama and ADV are sole owners. I only wish Chrno was mine...
DISTRIBUTION:, FicWad, and whoever wants it can have it. Just ask.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: This hit me just after I watched episode 23. The look on Chrno's face when he was sitting in the back of the car literally made my heart clench and I automatically associated it with this thought process. On another note, after watching the last two DVDs of this series, I don't think I've ever cried so hard.
Anyway, it's short, it's bittersweet, and I hope you all like it.

His chest hurt. Not so much from the slab of concrete that had been pressed against it and his pre-existing wounds. That physical pain was just a whisper of agony in comparison to the weight that Chrno's heart bore.

He couldn't shake the image from his head. Rosette's dull, lifeless eyes... As though she had already passed away. The spark of her inner light had been absent as she looked at him emptily.

/'I want back... my lost time.'/

Her softened voice was sharp in his mind-double-edged and unforgiving. It tore through his sinful soul with its utter honesty. Chrno felt like he was still standing in front of her in that abandoned sanctuary. The leather that covered the back of the driver's seat didn't even register as he stared blankly at it.

/This can't be happening to us, /his stubborn side insisted.

/'I want back... my lost time.'/
/ /
A piece of himself crumbled inside. Broken and useless... Just how he felt.

/'Have you ever considered changing your name to the God of Death?'/

I've been killing her slowly for four years... If my death would restore her life, I'd gladly give it to her. /Chrno blinked for the first time in what felt like hours and grimaced at the stab of pain that lanced through the wound in his abdomen. /Rosette...

Vaguely, in his peripheral vision, Chrno could see Father Remington observing him through the car window. Though it was a short glance, the weight of his gaze added to the pressure on Chrno's chest and the devil had to wonder if guilt had the ability to kill.

He felt like dying. That would certainly end the contract with Rosette. With her time running as low as it was, she'd probably live a few more years-maybe less-if he ended his life now.

You'd be taking the easy way out, /the same stubborn, Rosette influenced, part of himself objected. /You can't give up like that. There's always another way. Keep thinking, damn you.

But the part of Chrno that felt nothing but despair tightened around his heart and he suddenly found himself fighting tears.

/'I want back... my lost time.'/
/ /
Chrno didn't blink as moisture clouded his blank stare at the seat in front of him.

Have I lost you?


I'll fix this. I promise.

"I'm sorry."

Chrno blinked just as Father Remington and the Elder returned inside the vehicle. He finally moved one hand to wipe his cheek free of the one tear that escaped.

To the two men in the front seat, the guilt and agony that flowed through the interior of the car was enough to be felt physically. Quietly, as Remington started the engine and began to drive, the Elder spoke.

"'We are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed...'" the old man glanced across his shoulder at the defeated-looking figure in the back seat. "Chrno, take this to heart."

/Struck down, but not destroyed... /Things were nowhere near the end, and Chrno felt he had more thinking to do. A resolved expression drowned out the melancholy one that previously dominated his face.

I'll bring you back, Rosette. I'll right the wrong. In any way I can...


The Elder is quoting 2 Corinthians 4:8-9. And once again, this was something I typed WAY too early in the morning. Any mistakes are my own. Forgive me. Thank you for reading.

Oh yeah! Please click the little lavender button down there and leave me a review.

8/26/2005 4:56:14 AM
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