Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > I Like It When We Touch

What's A Boner?

by BrightLights 8 reviews

Frank learns a few things.

Category: My Chemical Romance - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Angst,Humor,Romance - Characters: Frank Iero,Gerard Way,Mikey Way - Published: 2010-04-01 - Updated: 2010-04-01 - 591 words

I walked up to the front porch of the Way home. The bushes that lined the front of the house were dying out and the paint on the door was chipping. I knocked and waited, hearing a loud crash and a few mild obscenities before the door opened.

"Oh, hey Frank!" Mikey exclaimed when he saw me

"Hey Mikes" I said, coming fully into the house

He went into the living room and I followed, "So... what's up?" he plopped down on the couch

"Well... something weird happened to me today"

"Really... what?" he asked curiously

I shoved my hands in my pockets, suddenly feeling a little awkward, but this is Mikey... he's my best friend, he'll understand.

"Well, I was in English class and my... my..." He gave me a weird look, "Well, umm.... what does it mean when your... thing stands up?"

"What do you mean?"

"Like when your penis... stands up?"

He looked at me for a long moment before he let out a chuckle,"Good one Frank... now seriously, what happened today?"

"I am being serious" I said quietly

He gave me another weird look, "Oh my God, you don't know what a boner is?"

"Who doesn't know what a boner is?" Gerard asked as he came into the room

"Frank doesn't know what a boner is!"

"You don't know what a boner is?" Gerard said, turning to me

"What's a boner? " I asked, feeling stupid as soon as the words left my mouth

Mikey suddenly burst out laughing.

"Mikey... you're being really immature" Gerard said, holding back his own laughter.

I hung my head down in shame.

"How can you not know what that is Frank... didn't you pay attention in health class?" Mikey asked between giggles

"I guess not," I threw myself on the couch and held my head in my hands.

"Aww Frank..." Gerard said, coming to sit next to me.

Mikey was still laughing,"Well anyways... if you want me I'll be in my room" he walked towards the stair-case,"Boner..." he chuckled once more before jogging up the stairs.

"I feel so stupid" I said more to myslef than anyone else

"It's okay Frankie... I'm sure there's lots of 16 year old boys that don't know what boners are"

"What is a boner?"

"It's when your penis gets hard"

"Oh..." I said, trying to understand,"...and why does that happen?"

"Well, when you get sexually excited, you usually get a boner"

"What makes you excited?"

"When you see a girl you really like... you might get hard, or when you watch porn or something"

"Oh..." I said again, trying to make sense of this new information "Do you get them?"

He looked a little surprised by my question, but then he smiled, "Um... yea I do, everyone does... well not the girls"

"Hmm... so what happens after you get hard?"

"Well, you have sex... or jack off"

"Jack off?"

"You touch yourself... down there"

"Oh... Does it feel good?"

"Well... yea it does, I guess"

"Do you do it?"

His eyes went wide, "Let's talk about something else. Is there anything you wanted to know about?"


I left Gerard's house about an hour later, I had a lot of homework to do. I feel so stupid not knowing about all those things, it's just that I never really paid attention to them. I haven't had an interest in girls or anything so I didn't really need to know about sex and stuff. But I wouldn't mind if Gerard taught me a few things...
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