FicWad

My eyes flicked to the phone that was set on the coffee table in front of me. Hugging my legs and resting my chin on my knees, I watched the television screen but couldn't help but take a glimpse of the silver coloured phone. I frowned at it and looked back at the tv. My favourite show was on and it annoyed me that it didn't take all my concentration away.

My attention went back to the home pone when it started ringing. My breath got caught in my throat before I jumped up and answered the phone.
"Hello?" I answered.
"Hey Josie."
"Oh Quinn, how are you?"
"You seem slightly upset that it's me," she chuckled.
"No, no I was just waiting for a call, that's all."
"Oh," she paused. 'Still waiting for a call from Gerard?"
"Um... maybe..." my voice was high pitched.
"He'll call soon, just give him time"
"Time?" I pushed my hair behind my ears. "Why would he need time?"
"Because," she sighed. "You guys kinda got into a huge fight and just went your separate ways."
"Wow, I really must have been a bad person."
"He just needs to realise that you've changed, once he sees that he'll call."
I sat back on the sofa and let my mind go through many scenarios of what must have happened between us.
"Just don't think about it too much."
I nodded even though I knew she couldn't see, "Yea, I won't."

After a short conversation with Quinn, I put the phone back on the coffee table and rested on the sofa. What I didn't understand was why Gerard meant something to me. I didn't remember anything about him, not even some outline about him, not even a memory. But it felt like we had a past together and that I had to know him, all over again if I had to. I guess we really were close friends if he affects me like this. I smiled to myself, I have a friend that is a rock star.

At work the next day I was so dozed off in my thoughts that work didn't seem to take my attention at all. I spent the first hour that day sitting in my office and making up scenes of what must have happened between Gerard and I. Maybe I secretly hated him and tried to destroy his career with tabloids. I pressed my lips together. But why would I do that? I was an evil person so maybe I was jealous that he had a better career than mine so I wanted to destroy him.

I tapped my pen on my lips, that theory seems to fit in, but it kept hooking me in because I really wanted to know the real reason why we fought. I was over nagging Quinn about it because all she said was that it was Gerard to explain not her.

I huffed just as my office door knocked. "Yes?" I called out.
The design director Angelica came in, "Got some designs for the magazine for you to approve."
"I'll look at them later," I pushed my seat back away from my table. "Angelica, can you do me a favour?"
"What is it?" she looked up at me from putting the file of paper on my table.
"Get me Gerard's contact details?" I made a pleading look on my face.
"But you and Gerard don't -"
"Yea I know," I didn't need to hear it again. "I just have some work related issues to talk to him about."
She raised an eyebrow and looked at me suspiciously.
"You know," I paused to look at my computer to think of a better reason. "The interview from the other day, just needed to ask him about one of our questions given to him."
"Oh okay," she grinned. "I'll try and get it for you."
I breathed out a sigh of relief.

As I waited for Angelica to return with the details, I decided to pass time by looking through the designs that were made for different parts of the magazine. I scribbled in my signature to show that I have approved of the designs and placed them on the far side of my desk.

Angelica came in not long after, she had a sheet of paper and handed it to me. "I'm sorry but the only contact to him is via email."
I nodded, "That's good enough thanks, I've approved of the designs," I gestured to the file of paper on the table.
She smiled and thanked me before leaving my office with the designs.
I got into real business the second she closed the door. I opened a new email and type in his address and wrote a quick short letter lettin him know who I am and that I was sorry for the past mistakes that I've committed and that I wanted to see him for coffee.
"This better be good enough for him," I mumbled to myself before I clicked on the send button.

I never got a reply.

I tried convincing myself the rest of my shift at work that he was busy and he hasn't checked his email just yet.
"Ground level," said the automatic voice in the lift before the doors opened.
I stepped out and cradled the folder in my arms and was about to take the trip to my car when a familiar looking man took a step out of the shadows and smiled.
I stared at him blankly and tightened my grasp on the folder I was holding. I didn't know if I should just walk away or just stare back at him.
"Josephine," the tall brunette greeted me and took a step towards me.
I positioned my left foot behind my right in case I needed to bolt off. "And you are?"
"I'm sorry," he lowered his head. "I forgot about your amnesia. I'm Mikey, Gerard's brother," he gave me a reassuring smile.
"Nice to meet you," I calmed down and smiled.
"Would you like to grab a coffee with me?"
"Yea, of course."

I watched him take a bite of his toasted banana bread before I sipped some of my latte. I had no idea what he wanted to talk about. Maybe he wanted to talk about the times he remembered about me so he can try and help me remember. Or maybe about Gerard.
"You know, you and Gerard use to come to this cafe every morning to drink that latte," he pointed at the cup I was holding.
"Really?" I looked down at me cup. "We must be committed coffee lovers then."
He chuckled, "Yea."
I looked down at my cup and smiled. I wish I just remembered the good times we had.
"Do you remember anything at all?" he peaked at me. His eyes held interest.
I shook my head and leaned back on the wooden chair. "No, I can't remember anything of the last 10 years."
"10 years?" he looked at me in disbelief. "So you have no idea what events took place in your life in those ten years?"
I nodded, "Well I remember graduating from high school then going to college studying journalism then, I remember just a few weeks back. I've had people tell me about some of the events that's affected me like my career and friends and stuff."
"Wow, do you think... you'll remember everything eventually?" he leaned on the table.
I sighed slowly and gazed at my cup as I moved the spoon around in the cup. "As much as I do... I don't want to because I'll see how much of a bad person I was." I stopped playing with the spoon and looked up at him. "The doctors said I might remember in a period of time. But I wanna stay as I am now, I make people happy and they respect and love me for who I am now."
"Don't be scared Josie, if you have the will to stay as who you are now then nothing can change that even if you were to remember the last 10 years."
"Well, I don't wanna remember. I don't need a reminder to why no one loved me," I slumped my shoulders and took another sip of my coffee.
"Don't say that, it didn't stop Gerard falling in love with you though."
I almost choked on my coffee but safely gulped it down and let my eyes pop out of its sockets and just stared at him in disbelief.
Mikey looked at me as if he did something terribly wrong. "Shit, you didn't know that?"
I shook my head, "So are you saying Gerard was in love with me?"
Mikay swore at himself, "No wonder he didn't reply to your email, because he knew you had no idea of the past."
I was only half listening to him, it felt like a lot to take in. So we weren't close friends? Were we something then? Maybe we were friends and he confessed his feelings to me and I flipped him off. "What happened between us Mikey?"
He abruptly stood up, "We should go, I just realised I have a doctor's appointment in half an hour."
I didn't object but grabbed all my things and followed him to his car. I left my car in the car park at work.

In the car, we sat in silence as Mikey rushed through traffic. I peaked at him sideways, he seemed to look uncomfortable and is eyebrows were creased which was an obvious sign that he was in deep thought.
I cleared my throat, "Are you ever going to tell me what happened with me and Gerard?" I didn't know why I asked when I knew the answer.
"It's between you and Gerard and it's not my right to tell you..." he said as he focused on the road.
"I guess it was pretty bad huh?"
He clicked his tongue.




I'm sorry for the long wait, I hope it wont happen again.
Enjoy.