Categories > Books > Harry Potter > Heir of Sword and Stave

Chapter 6: On Board the Hogwarts Express

by quilla04 8 reviews

Harry is on the Hogwarts Express. 'nuff said.

Category: Harry Potter - Rating: PG - Genres: Humor - Characters: Draco,Harry,Hermione,Neville,Ron - Warnings: [!] [V] [?] - Published: 2010-07-14 - Updated: 2010-07-14 - 2048 words

5Funny
Chapter Six: On Board the Hogwarts Express

(A/N: Hi all, Leonineus here again. I apologize for the massively lengthy A/N this time, but there are a few things I need to say, one of which is somewhat important for my peace of mind. About two days after I posted the double dosage of S&S, I received a most troubling review on Fanfiction.net from a reader named jimk. Jimk proceeded to tell me that he had originally enjoyed the story but that it had now begun to, in his words, “degenerate into a complete farce”. He also used every single point he could to criticize the story. I’m not claiming I’m perfect; I’m not a god and this is my first fic that everyone actually enjoyed so I’m undoubtedly going to have flaws to my style for the moment. Said review is still present if anyone wants to go look for themselves. I said this to jimk and I want to say it to every one of my readers; I am NOT twisting your arm, holding a gun to your head or a knife to your neck to make you read this. You are under no obligation WHATSOEVER to read this fic; you do so completely of your own volition. I sincerely hope that everyone enjoys reading this story; I know I enjoy writing it. All the positive reviews I receive make me extremely happy, and the occasional negative one tells me where I need to improve. If you don’t like it, don’t read it; it’s that simple. Anyway, enjoy the chapter everyone! Leonineus out!)

Hermione Granger was internally rejoicing. After years of being tormented by people for her somewhat introverted ways, she finally had a friend who wasn’t just being friendly because she could help them out with their homework. Harry was the kind of person whom Hermione could trust implicitly. What was more; he was someone who actually understood why she behaved as she did, and he told her that there was nothing wrong with her attitude to learning; it was important to learn. She was just starting to relax when the compartment door slid back and a tearful boy looked in, “Sorry, but have you seen a toad at all?” Harry shook his head, as did Hermione, her long brown hair swinging around her face with the motion. The boy wailed, “I’ve lost him! He keeps getting away from me!”

Harry couldn’t stand to see anyone so upset as this boy was, so he extended Erwydd from its holster, raised it and muttered, “Accio toad.” A second later, the toad flew through the door over the boy’s shoulder and into Harry’s hand. Harry grinned and handed the toad back, “Here you go.” The boy stared at him for a second, then smiled and thanked him. Harry waved off the thanks and gestured for the boy to sit down. He sat and introduced himself as Neville Longbottom. Harry and Hermione both introduced themselves as well, and Hermione lay down for a brief nap. She was apparently tired after laying awake for most of the previous night worrying about going to Hogwarts.

Five minutes after Hermione lay down to sleep, the door slid back and Ron, the redheaded boy from earlier, looked in, “Hey, could I sit here?” he said, pointing to an empty seat. Harry nodded, and the boy looked around. Walking over to Hermione, he gave her a sharp poke in the side. When she sat bolt upright, looking around, he sat smartly down on the seat where she had been lying. Hermione finally gave a sigh and lay back down, inadvertently putting her head into the redhead’s lap. She stared upwards for a second then shrieked, leapt up and somehow managed to relocate into Harry’s lap. Hedwig, above them, gave an indignant trill.

Harry gave Hermione a slight grin where she sat on his lap, “Enjoy yourself?” She gave a faint giggle.

They were interrupted by Ron Weasley, whom scowled and said, “Why don’t you go look for the lunch trolley, girl, and let me talk to Harry Potter alone?”

Harry scowled back and drew Hermione close, “Why don’t you go looking for the lunch trolley, Weasley? I don’t believe you have any say in who sits in here or not.”

Weasley snorted, “Fine. I thought we might be able to be friends, Potter, but I see that your fame has just made you an arrogant jerk!”

Harry’s eyes flashed, “Oh, so you think I’d rather have my fame than my family? Well? You think I’d rather be a famous orphan than a completely non-famous kid with a family???”

Ron was starting to turn red as he stood up and glared at the boy opposite, “Yeah, I do think that! You’re so pigheaded Potter, I think you might just be glad that your parents are dead and you’re not because it means you get even more fame than you already would have! If they weren’t, they probably would wish they were just so they didn’t have to put up with you!”

That was it for Harry; his temper snapped, he stood and grabbed Ron by the neck, slamming him against the wall. “Never say that again…” he said in a dangerous tone, “Ever, unless you want to get badly hurt. At least you have a family who care for you and wave goodbye on the platform. Me, I don’t have any kind of family left.”

Hermione watched with wide eyes. When she saw Weasley’s face turning blue she jumped up and tugged on Harry’s arm, “Harry, let him go. He’s not worth it.”

Harry’s enraged expression instantly cleared. He loosened his grip on the gasping idiot’s neck and let him drop to the floor. “Get out,” he snarled at the boy, “I want you out of this compartment right now.”

The redhead pulled himself upright and stepped away from Harry, “Make me!”

Harry didn’t respond; he just folded his arms. Weasley snorted, “You don’t scare me, Potter!”

Harry smirked, raised one hand and drew Excalibur about two inches out of its sheath on his back, “How about now?”

Weasley got the point very quickly, and rapidly vacated the compartment. Harry slid the sword fully back into its sheath and sat down. Hermione and Neville stared at him. He smirked back, “What? I am not going to put up with people like him at Hogwarts.”

Neville smiled, “You know, you’re actually ok, Harry. Not a bit like everyone was expecting, including me for a while.”

Harry eyed Neville, “Oh really? Well I guess I have confused a lot of people like that. I actually spent two years under glamour charms to disguise my appearance. Then I revealed my true face this morning and proceeded to take a lot of people by storm.”

The door slid open at the moment. Harry looked up to see the blonde boy from the platform in the doorway. “Hello,” drawled the boy, “You must be Harry Potter.”

Harry glared at him. He recognized the boy as the blond whom had knocked into him outside Madame Malkin’s in Diagon Alley; the one whom had trashed the shop by pushing over the display racks. “That’s me,” said Harry curtly, “and you are?”

The boy smirked, “The name’s Malfoy, Draco Malfoy…”

Harry laughed, “Bond fan, much?” Hermione laughed as well, recognizing the reference to the British spy’s favourite method of introduction.

Draco Malfoy surveyed him for a moment before turning his eyes on the other two occupants of the compartment. “Longbottom?” he sneered incredulously, “What point is there in hanging around with a Squib like Longbottom, Potter? You really need someone who can show you the right people to be associated with.”

Harry raised an eyebrow, “You feel I should associate with you and these two strapping young lads? Hey, it’s your life but I’m afraid I don’t swing that way.”

Draco Malfoy stared at him, “What?”

Harry gave him a friendly smile, “It’s just a lifestyle choice, there’s nothing to be ashamed of about being gay.”

Malfoy’s jaw dropped, “But I’m not gay.”

Harry shook his head slightly, “Denial. You’ll have to come out of the closet eventually; you might as well get it out now. Nothing good comes from keeping something like that bottled up.”

Malfoy’s face went red, “I’m not! I’m not gay!”

Harry held up a hand, “Spending that amount of time on your clothes and hair? You’re either extremely effeminate or in the closet and you don’t strike me as the effeminate type.”

“I AM NOT GAY!” screeched Malfoy; his voice rising in pitch, “You hear me? I’m NOT gay!”

Hermione and Neville were now shaking with stifled laughter in their seats, and Harry was only able to stop himself dissolving into helpless sniggering by clenching his fists and concentrating on the reddening blond in front of him.

“Look, Malfoy,” said Harry calmly, “I appreciate you don’t want to admit it, but I promise I won’t tell anyone. Remember, it’s nothing to be ashamed of; it’s a lifestyle choice as I said before!”

“I’M NOT GAY!!!” screamed Malfoy at the top of his voice, “I’M NOT!!!”

Harry shrugged carelessly, “Suit yourself if you don’t want to admit it right now, but you’ll have to eventually whether you want to or not…”

Malfoy swore angrily at Harry as he stepped back. Harry stood and smiled cheerfully at him before shutting the door in his face. Turning back into the compartment, Harry took one look at his new friends and dissolved into helpless laughter.

“He,” gasped Harry, “is going to hate me for this, but that was totally worth it! The look on his face was priceless!”

There was a clattering outside the compartment a few minutes after Malfoy’s abrupt departure, and a large trolley appeared, pushed by a plump lady. She asked, “Anything off the trolley, dears?”

Harry nodded slightly before standing and walking to the compartment door. He quickly checked over all the foodstuffs on the trolley before selecting an assortment. Then he stepped back and turned to Hermione and Neville. They each stood and pointed out what they wanted. Harry gathered it all up, waited while the woman counted it, then handed her his money. Smiling, he carried all the food back in and piled it all onto an empty seat. They all grabbed different sweets: Hermione a Chocolate Frog; Neville some Drooble’s Gum and Harry a box of Every Flavour Beans. He opened it, dropped one into his palm and threw it into his mouth. The other two watched him. For a second, Harry chewed happily. Neville nudged Hermione and nodded towards Harry, whose face had just changed faster than a chameleon. A second later he gagged, stood up, shoved his head through the window and spat out the Bean.

“What?” said Hermione concernedly.

Harry sat back down muttering ominously, “I forgot why I don’t like Every Flavour Beans. Who the hell would enjoy a Bean flavoured like dragon dung???”

“Ewwwwwwww!” cried Hermione as Neville burst out laughing. Harry was busily chugging a bottle of iced pumpkin juice, desperate to get the taste of dragon dung out of his mouth. Finally he lay down for a nap, Hermione promising to wake him when they reached the journey’s end.

(A/N: Sorry about the abrupt ending, but I’ve said all I need to for this chapter and I really need to sleep, so I’m going to post this and then crash. By the way, I took down Potter’s Brother after the votes came in. I appreciate that some of you enjoyed it, I really do. As such, I’m replacing it with a different fic I came up with on the spur of the moment. I hope you’ve enjoyed this chapter and I hope you enjoy the upcoming new fic. This is Leonineus signing off; GOOD NIGHT!!!)
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