Categories > Celebrities > 30 Seconds to Mars
Converting Jared
2 reviewsInnocent school girl Stacey gets more than she bargained for when she falls for 'the new kid' (aka Jared)
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Converting Jared
(#) eileanskye 2010-08-14
So, after you've finished the story I think I should give you an overall review :)
I really like this story and I think it's your second-best so far (the best being 'I miss you Jared Leto', I just love that one :D)
However, there are some things you could improve. This is really meant to be constructive criticism and no offence. I'm not an expert myself but that's just what I noticed while reading, and maybe it helps you :)
I think you have really good ideas, the only thing is that sometimes you're "jumping" too fast from one thing to another, which sometimes makes things seem a bit ridiculous...if you know what I mean.
But other than that I think you're a good writer and hopefully you will keep writing, because like I said, you have really good ideas! :)
xx StefAuthor's response
Thanks you so much for trying to help me improve! I have a few more stories planned and I will bare that in mind!
Thanks again and I hope you check out any new stories I upload!
Jen xx
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