FicWad

I had always received a sense of pleasure from solitude. Isolation from others had simply supplied me with a comfort that I could not find elsewhere. It granted me the courage to be myself, a task that I could not handle when surrounded by individuals of any kind. When I was alone, I did not feel disdain. I did not feel guilt. I did not feel rejected. I was at peace.

But even through my seclusion, I had always known that I still had you.

I was never fond of socializing with others, just as others were never fond of socializing with me. And while I did manage to develop friendships with a few individuals over the years, never once did I feel truly comfortable around them. Every moment spent with them was a constant strain on both of our parts. And this strain was so intense that all of these relations eventually came to an end.

But our friendship was, miraculously, different from my failed others. I had developed a great comfort with you, one that I had only ever felt in solitude.

We had been honest with each other, accepting the other for their true self. You had never once attempted to alter me in a way to fit your desires. You had never once forced me upon a situation where there might be the slightest of uneasiness on my part. You let me be. And we were both satisfied with that.

We had been unafraid of each other, always willing to speak our mind without fear of offending the other. You had been invincible to my words. Everything in which I spoke of towards you was either taken as a joke or simply an opinion, one of which you could respect. You allowed me freedom with my words, as I allowed you the same.

But even so, this all could not halt our friendship from withering away. And while I am aware of our dying relationship, I cannot quite grasp it at this point. It does not seem real that every moment shared together becomes nothing more than a bittersweet memory.

And this all inflicts guilt upon me, for I cannot help but to place the blame on myself. You had always been a better friend to me than I had ever been to you. And perhaps the ending of our friendship is a punishment directed towards me. You will be able to recover, being that you possess other friends to fall back onto. But I do not. I am simply left with loneliness. And it appears that loneliness is now my sole companion.