- This is a lovely little story about the relationship between Laguna and Squall. I love the way that Squall is all business, but Laguna is thinking so much of the woman he loved in the man he never got to know.
I like the way Laguna is so gilled with regrets, regrets about Squall and Ellone and Raine.
I love the way that Laguna finally just calls him "son" and his observation (which is so true) that the simplest things can be the hardest to say.
You write Laguna's awkward dreaminess and Squall's coldness and stiffness very well. I even like the way you left off before Squall has time to react - as if you are drawing a curtain over this private moment.
"Or maybe even I love you, though Laguna knew that the last, especially, was something the boy will refuse to believe." I would change "will" to "would" to keep the tense consistent in that sentence.
- This is one of those stories that captures an important moment from canon (for it's likely to have happened sooner or later) and catches the characters so well that it seems to meld itself onto canon -- ah, yes, that is how it would've been. Squall's stiffness, Laguna's ever-present awkwardness and regrets, and the way Laguna stops listening because he's wrapped up in Raine -- all fit. I love the brief poignant fantasy of Raine still alive, Laguna with his family, in contrast to Squall's rather sullen disposition. There's so much good in this piece, and it all revolves around the difficulty behind that last word.
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