Categories > TV > Grey's Anatomy

I'd Do Anything

by DesperateforGreys 2 reviews

Meredith deals with all the traumatic events that have happened. One-shot.

Category: Grey's Anatomy - Rating: G - Genres:  - Warnings: [!] - Published: 2010-08-02 - Updated: 2010-08-02 - 892 words - Complete

She hadn't realized it was possible to feel that much pain. To be so overcome and overwhelmed with grief that the thought of life possibly going on was an impossibility. To have waves and waves of sorrow continuously crash into her so fast and so hard that she felt like she was drowning. The kind of drowning that couldn't even be compared to drowning in Elliot Bay, because this had been so much worse. All the pain had made her head spin and her mind numb. With all she had already been through in life, she had never imagined possibly having to suffer through something worse than all the crap she had dealt with combined. And this is Meredith 'freakin Grey we're talking about. Abandoned by her father, neglected by her mother, having two of her closest friends disappear in the blink of an eye, she thought all the crap was finally done. No more dark and twisty, only bright and shiny things to look forward to for the future.

She was wrong. If she had to pick a day in her life that was most dark and twisted, it would've been today. The day that her life came crashing down around her. She had watched as her husband was ruthlessly shot, falling to the ground with blood gushing from his chest. She had watched as a gun was held to her best friend's head. She had watched that gun turn and face her, willing to die if it meant saving her husband. As if all that wasn't already enough, she then had to witness her husband dying; the line on the monitor running straight, confirming her worst fear. She had collapsed onto the floor, nothing in the world mattering anymore. Her husband was dead, which meant that she was dead. She was nothing without him. But miraculously, he wasn't dead. He was alive. He was going to be okay. That's what she had kept repeating to herself over and over in her head as she treated Owen's wound. It's what kept her going. But that shed of light from that knowledge wasn't enough to save everything. As the scarlet blood had run down her thighs, staining her scrubs and piercing the shattered remains of her heart, it had taken everything in her not to break down. All that kept her going was Derek. That's all she could think of. She couldn't think of the fact that her baby, her precious baby, was no longer there. She couldn't think of how the tiny being that she had only been allowed a few hours to love was gone forever. She just couldn't. Her focus needed to be solely on fixing Owen, and then being there for her husband through the rest of his surgery.

But after all that was done, Meredith had allowed herself to break down, because she honestly couldn't take it anymore. She had gone into a supply closet and let the weight of all the events that day finally come crashing down, and had cried for all she was worth. She had no idea how long she had sat in there, head against the wall, hunched over on the ground, literally unable to support her own weight. The numbness she had let take over before to keep herself going was gone. It was like the anesthetics had completely worn off while she was getting surgery, all the pain penetrating her down to her core.

She knew she couldn't stay in the closet forever. She had to get up, open the door, and face everything that had happened. She had to go face learning everyone else that was shot, the police's questioning, her husband's long recovery, her baby that was no more, and all the sadness and grief that now lingered in the hospital halls.

All she wanted to do was go to her bright and shiny place. Lying in bed with Derek as he stroked her hair, riding a ferry boat with Derek, kicking ass at a solo surgery with Derek by her side…anything but the reality which she knew she had to inevitably go out and face.

But she would face it. She wouldn't immerse herself under the water in a bathtub or drown in a bay. She would go out and face the hell that her world had become. She had to, for her own sake, and for Derek's sake as well. The both of them had a long recovery period ahead of them, both physically and emotionally. They're going to need each other. He's going to need her. And for him, she would do it. She would face anything life threw at her for Derek, that she was sure of. She wasn't sure if she would ever get over her baby, or if the image of the bullet penetrating Derek's chest would ever get out of her head, or if she would ever be able to walk across the catwalk again without breaking down. But she was sure of the fact that she could deal with all of it for Derek.

That was the only thing she was sure of.

A/N: I'd love to hear what you thought of this! :) So please review! It would honestly make my day! :D I know it wasn't very long or anything, I promise longer ones in the future :]
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