FicWad

Lies. The basis of any encounter with anybody, fake smiles, cheerful greetings. A Lie that’s all he ever was. So perhaps he wasn’t completely straight in the head, but then aren’t we all insane inside? That was until he showed up of course, with his torn jeans, puppy dog eyes, unkempt hair and charming smile. then there was the drug addictions, but he could see past that, he knew that there was still somebody left inside, somebody that he could care for. Somebody to take his mind of himself for once, to make him forget about the failure he was. He looked deep into his glassy hazel eyes and saw truth, and courage. He wanted to do something with his life. Didn’t want to be a nobody like they both were back then. He had the keys to his soul, “you’ve got talent Frankie, real talent. Join my band?”
But I couldn’t, didn’t want to, I was happy just being us, no fame, no money, nothing else. Frank and Gerard Way, just another gay couple from Jersey. He was always going to love him, even after all the things that he called him, even after he pushed him down the stairs of their house because he wouldn’t play guitar for him, he was in hospital for weeks after that. he could never hate him for what he did to him. He always seemed so truthful and upset afterwards when he came home drunk begging for forgiveness, he’d promised he’d never do it again, but then of course he always did.
All he ever wanted to do was to please Gerard, so in the end he did join his band, and he hated every minuet of it, but at least he seemed happy. ‘More energy Frank, we need more energy’ he’d told him. So he did, every show he’d play until he collapsed. The short kisses in-between always made it worthwhile. And every night when he’d order him around and lock him outside the bus to sleep on the pavement just for his own amusement, he’d wonder if Gerard really did love him. But then he always apologised, and that smile on his face was priceless to him. He loved to see Gerard smile. Even when he got married to Lyn-z, he still told him that he loved them both the same, that he still loved him like he used to when they first met. He still just wanted Gerard. He remembered when he saw Lyn-z when she was pregnant, they both looked so happy. Smiling, he loved to see Gerard smile. even after he had Bandit he still loved Gerard, even when he told him that he wanted Frank to find somebody else and get married He remembered exactly how he felt when Gerard called him to say that they were recording the new album, thrilled. More time to spend with his precious soul mate. But as soon as they met outside that greying, dismal building on a chilly winter evening he knew that something was wrong. He’d just blanked him and walked inside. He was more distant than ever, more focused on his work. They didn’t speak, so he just hung around with Mikey and walked home to his apartment alone, back to see his wife, Jamia. He was actually happy when she told him that she was pregnant. Actually looked forward to seeing his two baby girls when he got home. It was then that he realised that he didn’t need anybody’s approval. He was Frank fucking Iero. And he’d do whatever the hell he wanted. He felt no pity when Gerard turned up to his house one evening, yet again wanting forgiveness, he’d closed the door on him.
Lies, that’s all he’d ever told him, and all he ever used to be, a lie.