Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Under Jersey Skies
A sad silence hung in the air as I entered the school grounds the following Monday. It seemed that Jessica’s death had really taken it’s toll on everyone. What was normally a total riot had become a completely different scene, with students talking quietly in small groups on the front lawn. A few of them looked up as I passed, giving me sympathetic looks for having lost someone who used to be my best friend. Even Danica, the moment the paramedics had arrived, she had called the party to a stop and sent everyone home.
The silence continued as I walked to the Art room for my first lesson. Upon entering the classroom, I noticed my table was empty, which meant Gerard wasn’t in school today. I couldn’t really blame him, he must be cut up, Jessica did used to be his girlfriend after all. But I couldn’t stop living life just because one person had died, that was no way to deal with it, and Jess wouldn’t want everyone to stop enjoying life because of it.
I unpacked my things and waited quietly for Faith to arrive. Ten minutes later the bell rang, and the rest of the class filed in, bringing in with them the same silence that hung in the air outside. Faith entered a few moments later, dressed in a black t-shirt and long black skirt, and called the class to her attention.
“Before we start our work I have been told to inform you all that at Lunchtime today you are all required to attend a special service to pay respect to Jessica LaTovey, who as most of you probably already know sadly passed away on the weekend. You will all be dismissed from there, as Principal Sanders has taken into consideration that some students may be too upset to continue the school day afterwards” she announced.
She took her seat behind her desk and the class set to work. I had my major to work on, which Jessica’s death or not, was due at the end of term. It was going to be a portrait, of one of my friends as a Vampire, and I had decided that the one person who fit the look of a Vampire best was Gerard, who had given me the theme for Vampires when we had first been set the task.
“Jackie, how are you?” Faith asked, coming to sit beside me at my table.
“I’m alright” I sighed.
“You’re sure? Because you can tell me if you’re upset about Jessica’s death, I’ll listen” she smiled, putting her hand on my arm comfortingly.
“Thanks Faith, but I’m okay, really, it’s Gerard I’m worried about” I frowned.
“Have you seen him today?” she asked.
“No, I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s not in school today, he’s got to heartbroken” I replied.
“He hasn’t been in school much at all lately, even before Jessica died, is there something I should know?” she asked.
“I don’t know what’s going on with him these days Faith, I really don’t” I sighed.
“I’m sure he has his reasons for what he does, maybe you should talk to him about it” she suggested.
“I’ve tried, but he never tells me anything” I said.
“Keep trying, I’m sure he’ll tell you in time” she reassured me.
“Your major looks great by the way, keep up the good work” she smiled, then got up and went back to her desk…
*
English continued in very much the same way, students who would normally be running wild and slacking off were focused on their work. The classroom was silent all but for the scratching of pens on paper. I sat in my usual spot beside Arriana and Joey, working on some lyrics I was writing for a free choice creative writing task.
And even though you’re not with us anymore,
I still hear your footsteps on the floor,
Almost silently padding their way through the corridors,
Hoping for that someone who can hear you
CHORUS:
Do you miss us all?
(Is this why you still linger?)
Are you afraid to fall?
(Into that darkened abyss)
To walk into the light
(Move on)
We love you and goodbye
“Those lyrics are good” whispered Arriana, peeking over at my work.
“Maybe I can put them to good use one day” I replied…
*
After an agonizingly awkward Music lesson, where everybody refused to play due to Jessica’s death, and a painfully silent Math lesson, Lunchtime finally came. I walked out to the front lawn, where seats had been placed, rows upon rows, with a walkway in the middle. The podium the teacher’s usually used at assembly stood in front of the chairs, alongside a table covered in a white sheet, with flowers and photos of Jessica set up decoratively on top.
I took a seat in the front row, alongside Frank, Mikey, Joey, Ray, Arriana & Bob. Slowly but surely, the other seats filled up as more students arrived and sat down. Still carrying that same depressing silence, it was really starting to get on my nerves, Jessica wouldn’t have wanted this, she wouldn’t have wanted everyone to be so sad.
My hands balled up into fists in my lap, so tight that my knuckles turned white. Frank put an arm around my shoulders, trying to calm me, and I let out a frustrated groan. Principal Sanders walked up to the podium, and called the students to her attention.
“My dear students, as I’m sure most of you are very aware, one of our Year 11’s tragically passed away on the weekend. I have called this service today to pay our respects to her. Jessica LaTovey was a warm and loving person, with an outgoing, fun loving nature. While not always the nicest person, Jessica was a very dear friend to some of you here. But sadly, she passed away from an Ecstasy overdose on Friday night. I want to express my deepest sympathies to Gerard Way, who was there in Jessica’s dying moments. Also, to Korey Sullivan, I know you loved her very dearly, and I am very sorry for your loss”
“Pfft, Gerard loved Jessica, Korey was just her fuck” Mikey grumbled next to Frank.
“To Michael Way, Frank Iero, Raymond Toro & Bob Bryar, I know Jessica has been a very dear friend to you all from your very first week at Kingsmith Collage, you must be heartbroken. Finally, to miss Jaqualine James, although you may not have known Jessica very long, I imagine you must be just as upset as her other friends, my deepest sympathies to you”
It was only at that moment that my mind acknowledged the wet trail running down my cheek. I thought I wouldn’t cry, that I wouldn’t be affected as badly by Jessica’s death as the others, because I hadn’t known her as long, and because of the way she’d treated me in the weeks leading up to her death. I thought I was the only one holding it together, the only one that was able to be strong about all this, but I guess I was wrong.
I looked over at my friends, they all seemed to be crying too, except for Bob, who had always been the most emotionally strong amongst us. Arriana’s head lay on Ray’s shoulder, drenching his shirt with tears. Mikey wore a mix between an angry and sad expression, his jaw clenched tight, trying not to show any sadness, but his tears betrayed him. Frank hung his head in sadness, a few small tears trailing down his face. I held his hand in comfort, and he allowed me to lean against him.
“I ask you all now for a moment of silence, and those of you who wish may come up and pay your respects” Principal Sanders finished.
Terry Fisher, a senior student, began to play a soft tune on her flute beside the table, and one by one, Bob, Ray, Frank, Mikey, Korey and myself walked up to the table and laid a single white rose upon it’s surface. Except for myself, I brought an extra rose from Gerard, as I could already tell he wouldn’t show up to school today.
As promised, we were all dismissed from the service, and I walked across the school grounds towards the main building. As I walked, I heard a quiet sobbing from nearby, and turned to see Korey Sullivan sitting at the base of a tree, hugging his knees to his chest, tears streaming down his face.
Part of me wanted to kick him relentlessly, to tell him it was all his fault, that if he hadn’t given those pills to Jessica, she’d still be alive right now. But somehow I couldn’t, as another part of me felt sorry for him. And so I did something I thought I’d never do, I spoke to him.
“It’s okay Korey, everybody else is just as upset as you are” I said, putting an arm around his shoulders.
“It’s.. all.. my.. fault” he whimpered in between sniffles.
“It’s not your fault” I reassured him.
“Yes it is, I should have known better than to have given those pills to her, now she’s dead, and it’s because of me!” he blamed himself.
“Korey, this could have happened to anyone, please, stop blaming yourself, you are in no way responsible for her death. Now wipe those tears away and smile, because I know that Jessica would have wanted you to be happy” I giggled, poking him in his rib. He chuckled and let out another sniffle, wiping his eyes with his sleeves.
“Thanks Jackie, you know, I’m sorry I’ve been so mean to you, you’re actually not that bad” he smiled.
“Well, you should never judge someone based on what other people say” I laughed.
“Yeah I guess you’re right, and I’m sorry I ratted you and Gerard out to Jessica, I know it was just a simple mistake, it’s just, I wanted Jessica so badly, but she never noticed me. When she got with Gerard I was anxious to find a way to break them up. So when I saw you and Gerard outside my house that day, a voice inside my head told me that was exactly the kind of thing I needed. And so I, being my selfish self, told Jessica, because I knew she’d place her trust in me after that, and I’d get what I always wanted. Her” he admitted, hanging his head in shame.
“Hey, it’s okay Korey, we all do stupid things when we’re in love, I understand” I said.
“Thanks, and thanks for the sympathy, nobody else would have spoken to me if you hadn’t” he smiled.
“No problem, I’m here if you wanna talk, anytime, I promise” I replied, getting to my feet.
“See you around” he said as I began to walk away.
“Yeah, you too” I replied.
As I walked back into the main building, I passed the glass display case that was built into the wall in the hallway. A gold framed memorial had been added, to show respect for Jessica’s passing. I continued down the hallway to collect my things from my locker, and as I packed my bag to go home, I made a promise to myself. Be Nice To Korey; Jessica’s dying wish. It had only really applied to Gerard, but I figured it was the least I could to pay my respects.
Frank was already waiting outside when I emerged from the building, and I ran into his arms, dropping my bag to the ground and throwing my arms around his neck. He kissed me as the tears came on again, and tightened his hold on me. We broke the kiss and he looked into my eyes and whispered “It’s gonna be okay” before wiping my tears away.
The ride home was quiet, and he held my hand the whole way. I kissed him one last time before I got out of the van, and made my way up the footpath to my house. I fumbled for my keys and unlocked the door, intending on hiding out in my room for the rest of the day.
“Jackie? Could you come in here a minute?” my father called as I stepped inside.
I groaned and walked into the dining room where I found him sitting at the table with a woman with long brown hair and tanned skin. She was dressed in a pair of scruffy blue jeans, a black leather jacket and a Guns ‘N’ Roses t-shirt. It’d been years, but I still recognized her. I dropped my bag to the floor.
“Mum?”
The silence continued as I walked to the Art room for my first lesson. Upon entering the classroom, I noticed my table was empty, which meant Gerard wasn’t in school today. I couldn’t really blame him, he must be cut up, Jessica did used to be his girlfriend after all. But I couldn’t stop living life just because one person had died, that was no way to deal with it, and Jess wouldn’t want everyone to stop enjoying life because of it.
I unpacked my things and waited quietly for Faith to arrive. Ten minutes later the bell rang, and the rest of the class filed in, bringing in with them the same silence that hung in the air outside. Faith entered a few moments later, dressed in a black t-shirt and long black skirt, and called the class to her attention.
“Before we start our work I have been told to inform you all that at Lunchtime today you are all required to attend a special service to pay respect to Jessica LaTovey, who as most of you probably already know sadly passed away on the weekend. You will all be dismissed from there, as Principal Sanders has taken into consideration that some students may be too upset to continue the school day afterwards” she announced.
She took her seat behind her desk and the class set to work. I had my major to work on, which Jessica’s death or not, was due at the end of term. It was going to be a portrait, of one of my friends as a Vampire, and I had decided that the one person who fit the look of a Vampire best was Gerard, who had given me the theme for Vampires when we had first been set the task.
“Jackie, how are you?” Faith asked, coming to sit beside me at my table.
“I’m alright” I sighed.
“You’re sure? Because you can tell me if you’re upset about Jessica’s death, I’ll listen” she smiled, putting her hand on my arm comfortingly.
“Thanks Faith, but I’m okay, really, it’s Gerard I’m worried about” I frowned.
“Have you seen him today?” she asked.
“No, I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s not in school today, he’s got to heartbroken” I replied.
“He hasn’t been in school much at all lately, even before Jessica died, is there something I should know?” she asked.
“I don’t know what’s going on with him these days Faith, I really don’t” I sighed.
“I’m sure he has his reasons for what he does, maybe you should talk to him about it” she suggested.
“I’ve tried, but he never tells me anything” I said.
“Keep trying, I’m sure he’ll tell you in time” she reassured me.
“Your major looks great by the way, keep up the good work” she smiled, then got up and went back to her desk…
*
English continued in very much the same way, students who would normally be running wild and slacking off were focused on their work. The classroom was silent all but for the scratching of pens on paper. I sat in my usual spot beside Arriana and Joey, working on some lyrics I was writing for a free choice creative writing task.
And even though you’re not with us anymore,
I still hear your footsteps on the floor,
Almost silently padding their way through the corridors,
Hoping for that someone who can hear you
CHORUS:
Do you miss us all?
(Is this why you still linger?)
Are you afraid to fall?
(Into that darkened abyss)
To walk into the light
(Move on)
We love you and goodbye
“Those lyrics are good” whispered Arriana, peeking over at my work.
“Maybe I can put them to good use one day” I replied…
*
After an agonizingly awkward Music lesson, where everybody refused to play due to Jessica’s death, and a painfully silent Math lesson, Lunchtime finally came. I walked out to the front lawn, where seats had been placed, rows upon rows, with a walkway in the middle. The podium the teacher’s usually used at assembly stood in front of the chairs, alongside a table covered in a white sheet, with flowers and photos of Jessica set up decoratively on top.
I took a seat in the front row, alongside Frank, Mikey, Joey, Ray, Arriana & Bob. Slowly but surely, the other seats filled up as more students arrived and sat down. Still carrying that same depressing silence, it was really starting to get on my nerves, Jessica wouldn’t have wanted this, she wouldn’t have wanted everyone to be so sad.
My hands balled up into fists in my lap, so tight that my knuckles turned white. Frank put an arm around my shoulders, trying to calm me, and I let out a frustrated groan. Principal Sanders walked up to the podium, and called the students to her attention.
“My dear students, as I’m sure most of you are very aware, one of our Year 11’s tragically passed away on the weekend. I have called this service today to pay our respects to her. Jessica LaTovey was a warm and loving person, with an outgoing, fun loving nature. While not always the nicest person, Jessica was a very dear friend to some of you here. But sadly, she passed away from an Ecstasy overdose on Friday night. I want to express my deepest sympathies to Gerard Way, who was there in Jessica’s dying moments. Also, to Korey Sullivan, I know you loved her very dearly, and I am very sorry for your loss”
“Pfft, Gerard loved Jessica, Korey was just her fuck” Mikey grumbled next to Frank.
“To Michael Way, Frank Iero, Raymond Toro & Bob Bryar, I know Jessica has been a very dear friend to you all from your very first week at Kingsmith Collage, you must be heartbroken. Finally, to miss Jaqualine James, although you may not have known Jessica very long, I imagine you must be just as upset as her other friends, my deepest sympathies to you”
It was only at that moment that my mind acknowledged the wet trail running down my cheek. I thought I wouldn’t cry, that I wouldn’t be affected as badly by Jessica’s death as the others, because I hadn’t known her as long, and because of the way she’d treated me in the weeks leading up to her death. I thought I was the only one holding it together, the only one that was able to be strong about all this, but I guess I was wrong.
I looked over at my friends, they all seemed to be crying too, except for Bob, who had always been the most emotionally strong amongst us. Arriana’s head lay on Ray’s shoulder, drenching his shirt with tears. Mikey wore a mix between an angry and sad expression, his jaw clenched tight, trying not to show any sadness, but his tears betrayed him. Frank hung his head in sadness, a few small tears trailing down his face. I held his hand in comfort, and he allowed me to lean against him.
“I ask you all now for a moment of silence, and those of you who wish may come up and pay your respects” Principal Sanders finished.
Terry Fisher, a senior student, began to play a soft tune on her flute beside the table, and one by one, Bob, Ray, Frank, Mikey, Korey and myself walked up to the table and laid a single white rose upon it’s surface. Except for myself, I brought an extra rose from Gerard, as I could already tell he wouldn’t show up to school today.
As promised, we were all dismissed from the service, and I walked across the school grounds towards the main building. As I walked, I heard a quiet sobbing from nearby, and turned to see Korey Sullivan sitting at the base of a tree, hugging his knees to his chest, tears streaming down his face.
Part of me wanted to kick him relentlessly, to tell him it was all his fault, that if he hadn’t given those pills to Jessica, she’d still be alive right now. But somehow I couldn’t, as another part of me felt sorry for him. And so I did something I thought I’d never do, I spoke to him.
“It’s okay Korey, everybody else is just as upset as you are” I said, putting an arm around his shoulders.
“It’s.. all.. my.. fault” he whimpered in between sniffles.
“It’s not your fault” I reassured him.
“Yes it is, I should have known better than to have given those pills to her, now she’s dead, and it’s because of me!” he blamed himself.
“Korey, this could have happened to anyone, please, stop blaming yourself, you are in no way responsible for her death. Now wipe those tears away and smile, because I know that Jessica would have wanted you to be happy” I giggled, poking him in his rib. He chuckled and let out another sniffle, wiping his eyes with his sleeves.
“Thanks Jackie, you know, I’m sorry I’ve been so mean to you, you’re actually not that bad” he smiled.
“Well, you should never judge someone based on what other people say” I laughed.
“Yeah I guess you’re right, and I’m sorry I ratted you and Gerard out to Jessica, I know it was just a simple mistake, it’s just, I wanted Jessica so badly, but she never noticed me. When she got with Gerard I was anxious to find a way to break them up. So when I saw you and Gerard outside my house that day, a voice inside my head told me that was exactly the kind of thing I needed. And so I, being my selfish self, told Jessica, because I knew she’d place her trust in me after that, and I’d get what I always wanted. Her” he admitted, hanging his head in shame.
“Hey, it’s okay Korey, we all do stupid things when we’re in love, I understand” I said.
“Thanks, and thanks for the sympathy, nobody else would have spoken to me if you hadn’t” he smiled.
“No problem, I’m here if you wanna talk, anytime, I promise” I replied, getting to my feet.
“See you around” he said as I began to walk away.
“Yeah, you too” I replied.
As I walked back into the main building, I passed the glass display case that was built into the wall in the hallway. A gold framed memorial had been added, to show respect for Jessica’s passing. I continued down the hallway to collect my things from my locker, and as I packed my bag to go home, I made a promise to myself. Be Nice To Korey; Jessica’s dying wish. It had only really applied to Gerard, but I figured it was the least I could to pay my respects.
Frank was already waiting outside when I emerged from the building, and I ran into his arms, dropping my bag to the ground and throwing my arms around his neck. He kissed me as the tears came on again, and tightened his hold on me. We broke the kiss and he looked into my eyes and whispered “It’s gonna be okay” before wiping my tears away.
The ride home was quiet, and he held my hand the whole way. I kissed him one last time before I got out of the van, and made my way up the footpath to my house. I fumbled for my keys and unlocked the door, intending on hiding out in my room for the rest of the day.
“Jackie? Could you come in here a minute?” my father called as I stepped inside.
I groaned and walked into the dining room where I found him sitting at the table with a woman with long brown hair and tanned skin. She was dressed in a pair of scruffy blue jeans, a black leather jacket and a Guns ‘N’ Roses t-shirt. It’d been years, but I still recognized her. I dropped my bag to the floor.
“Mum?”
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