FicWad

Slash regained conciousness. He rubbed his eyes slowly and yawned. Suddenly, he realised he had two hands to do it with. Where was Axl? Shooting bolt upright, Slash looked around the bed and realised he couldn't see him anywhere, but there was a faint path through the mess on his floor through to the bathroom made by someone who was obviously having trouble standing upright. Swinging his legs over the edge of the bed, he stood up, pulled on some boxers and made his way over to the door. About to open it, the guitarist realised he could hear a faint sound coming from inside. He stopped to listen and found that it sounded like muffled crying. Suddenly very protective of Axl, Slash threw his weight against the door handle but found it was locked.

He spoke carefully and quietly, "Axl?" The sound stuttered, as if someone was trying to get it under control. "Axe, are you okay, mate?" Still no response. "Man, you're worrying me. Talk to me! Or I'm gonna have to find some way in there!" He shoved the door again but, despite its crappy quality, it refused to budge. Slash sighed, "Please, Axl?"

"D-D-Don't c-come in," Slash could almost hear the tears in his voice, "You don't wanna see me like this."

"Yeah I do, man. I'm your friend! Who the fuck else are you gonna talk to? It's not like you have a dime towards paying a professional shrink. Let me in!" The guitarist slapped his hand against the door in frustration, but almost fell forward when there was a scape of metal against metal as a lock undid and the door swung open to reveal a thoroughly miserable Axl. He hadn't even thought to put on anything more than a shirt.

"See?" the singer was obviously struggling to hold back the tears that had so overcome him, "You don't wanna have to deal with this. No one does." He looked away.

Slash walked forwards and tipped Axl's chin up with the tips of his fingers, moving to peck him but the singer turned his head away. Thrown, he moved his hand to the shoulder instead. "Dude, what happened to you?"

Axl gave in and fell against Slash in floods of pent up tears. "I t-told you. Y-You don't w-wanna know."

The guitarist stroked his hair as he shuddered against him, tears running down his chest to soak the fabric of his boxers. "I do, man, I do. I'm hear for you, even if all I am is an ear to listen and a shoulder to cry on." Relenting, the singer looked sadly into his eyes for a moment before pulling him over to the corner where he'd been sitting and gestured for Slash to sit. Sitting himself, he leaned against the warm chest behind him and buried his face in the guitarist's soft hair.

He closed his eyes. "It's not you. I mean, I know what you're thinking. It's not your fault - not directly anyway. Last night was.... I can't describe it. I've never experienced anything like that. I was so... cared for. It wasn't like before." Realising he'd said too much, he buried his head further to avoid the dark eyes that were surely looking anxiously at him.

"Before?" Slash brought his arms around Axl and held him tight. "Man, if before is what it sounds like, that is not what... what we had is meant to be. What happened, dude?" He ran his hand lightly up and down the singer's back in the hope that the tense body against him might relax.

Axl closed his eyes; there was no turning back after what he was about to say. "When I was little, I had this stepdad. Well, I thought he was my real dad, but- well, he wasn't the nicest guy." Arms tightened around him, urging him to continue. "He...." He closed his eyes again, "H-He used to s-sexually abuse me and my brother and sister."

"Oh Axl..." Slash held him tight. He couldn't begin to imagine what it must be like to grow up scared of your own family.

The singer steeled himself to continue, "It was never like last night. Last night was.... wonderful. I've never felt anything like that! It was horrible. Our dad used to come and find us when mom was out and, well, we never stood a chance did we? You'd think fucking our mom was enough of an insult, but this!" He was shaking now. "So now you know why little Bill Bailey was crying in the corner." He pulled out of Slash's hold and leant forward, wrapping his arms around his knees. The guitarist reached out to touch his shoulder but he shook him off.

"I'm sorry, Axe. I shouldn't have asked." Slash got up to go back to bed.

"No," a small voice came from behind him, "Sorry I'm being so shitty, man. It's just... difficult to deal with, you know? This thing we had... have." He glanced round to find Slash looking at him with pity in his eyes, "Stay? Please. I need you to get through this." He tentatively reached out a hand and Slash grabbed it and sat down beside him, pulling him to his chest.

"Anything for you. Anything." Slash loosened his arms as Axl turned in his embrace to press his warm lips against those of his guitarist who pulled back, "are you sure this is the best thing, man? I mean, don't you wanna go slowly? After what you just said..."

"No, man. Thanks, but I just wanna get over it and overwrite the old memories with some new ones." Axl smiled against his lips as the guitarist relented and threw himself into a passionate kiss with the fragile man in his arms. He slid his hand under the shirt he was wearing, enjoying the feeling of the warm, pale skin against his own tanned fingertips and running his hand along the singer's spine. It felt as though electricity itself were passing between them.

Axl pulled away. "Man, there's something I've gotta tell you." For the first time, he looked the guitarist in the eye as he spoke. "Ever since this started, it's all been adding up and I think," He looked down, unable to hold the stare any longer, "I think I love you."

Slash froze. He hadn't been expecting that! He wasn't prepared! How could he respond?! Oh fuck, Axl was waiting, obviously hoping for some sort of reply. Did he love Axl? He really liked him, sure, he was attracted to him, sure, but did he love him?

The singer looked up at the solid guitarist, anxious, "Say something! Of all times, don't go silent now!" Tears began to form and roll down his cheeks. He'd just ruined the best thing that had ever happened to him. He'd fucked up his life again. "Oh fuck, well if the obvious response doesn't come to you, lets just forget this ever happened." He made to leave but Slash pulled him back down.

"Dude, let me think. It's a big thing to say and I wanna make sure it's right." He closed his eyes and thought of everything he'd done with Axl, thick and thin. There'd always been an extra bit of affection for him but last night had just made it explode. He wanted more; he wanted everything; he wanted..... him. "Axl, man, I love you too."

Slash had never seen anyone so relieved as Axl was in that moment. They both grinned and laughed nervously as the reality of the situation hit them, but it soon because full blown ecstasy. Neither could tell where the other began in their rush to get at each other. Slash bent over Axl, pressing him against the floor as he lay on top of him and pressed against him, worshiping every inch of his lover's magnificent body.

Axl closed his eyes. Nothing for him had ever been as perfect as this moment was now. Unfortunately, he had the feeling he'd soon have trouble walking all over again - but he just didn't care as he joined Slash in a whole new world of pleasure.