FicWad

Marred canvas. That’s the word. It’s the word for the sky, a murky grey color streaked by bone white clouds. It’s the word for my arms and thighs, and off white color streaked with scars. I am the sky. It’s going to rain, It rains when I cry. I sit on top of the roof, like a stony gargoyle, unfeeling, un-thought of, unloved. I shiver as a wind blows through my hollow bones. My once muscular figure has dwindled to next to nothing from lack of sleep, lack of food, lack of caring. The Misfits shirt I’m wearing, who knows who it belongs to, hangs off me like the extra skin of an ancient dog. My angel wings would be black, whipping in the cold bursts of air.
I can feel the rooftop shaking underneath my black boots. The music is loud in there. The band is actually quite appealing. They have the raw energy, they'll make it big. The bodies are twisting and churning in the head. People are back to back, front to front, grinding. The mosh pit has started up again, I can feel it, all the half dressed forms writhing and smacking. Sweat is dripping and being flung. It smells in there, you're burning in the heat, burning in the fire. That’s where you would be, the firey mosh pit. I know. You always loved the mosh pits. You loved the power, the electricity, the excitement, the violence. You loved me…

You loved me. I know you did. You were head over flipping heels for me. It’s easy to understand I mean...Look at me. And I know I have the personality to go with it. I’m not conceited. I simply know the truth. But that was before and this is after or perhaps it’s still during. Yes that’s it. It’s an ongoing process, but back to our story. It’s not my story because it would be nothing without you. It would be a blank book, a wordless song; a …I’m getting sidetracked again.

We’ve known each other since senior year in high school. You were the bad girl, the one that faked badness and really made straight A’s. Everyone believed you were the punkish slut, when you hadn’t done anything even past first base. You were an amazing actress, still are. Maybe it was all acting but I can’t let myself believe that, for obvious reasons. As the wind gets colder, so does my heart. We had had three classes together all of high school. We had never spoken a word to each other. Until that fateful day we became inseparable…