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Okay, that was definitely a slap in the face. Tom had called Bella all the words that I had longed to be called by someone. Well...alright...I had to admit that not all of those terms probably applied to me. Take courageous for example. I wasn't at all brave or courageous. I was one who would avoid battle at all costs and just liked to live at peace with the world.

Strong was another word that unfortunately, didn't describe me. I felt weak all the time these days. I wasn't sure if it was because I wasn't eating much or if I was just sick. However, when it all came down to it, it was a struggle for me to make it to all my normal classes with stumbling and falling. It was also just as much of a struggle not to fall asleep during class.

I actually had fallen asleep during Potions two days ago. Luckily, Professor Slughorn gently woke me up and asked me to get back to work. I was glad it was him and not some other Professor who had woken me up. Professor Slughorn was usually very nice to me. He was certainly my favorite Professor. Professor Cassiopia from Arithmancy was definitely the worst.

Anyways, I'm getting distracted. Let's get back to what Tom had been saying. He had also said that Bella was "everything that I'm not". What exactly was that suppose to mean? It meant that Bella was my opposite in any and every way. That felt more like a punch in the face. It was like Tom was saying that everything I was and did was pathetic and everything Bella did was admirable.

And of course, it killed me how he had called her beautiful. I had known from a very young age that Bella had been very beautiful. She was always getting compliments on her beauty from relatives ever since she was a little child. Everyone liked Bella because of her beauty. It wasn't fair to me though. I had tried so hard to be beautiful and yet here I was still being called ugly by people like Tom. I had tried so hard to work on my appearance and my body and Tom still thought I was hideous...

A tear slipped out of the corner of my eye and trailed down my cheek. Embarrassed that I couldn't keep it to myself, I blushed and looked at the ground as I inconspicuously wiped the tear away with my index finger. Of course, Tom still saw the tear though. Tom never missed anything. I swear nothing could happen that Tom missed.

Tom was obviously enjoying my discomfort. I knew I shouldn't give him the satisfaction of knowing how bad he had made me feel, but I just couldn't help it. I was already feeling awful physically and Tom's insults seemed like a sword in my side. Tom laughed quietly at my pain and continued on, "Oh yes, you could've been so much better. It's a shame we can't trade you in for another Bellatrix. That would certainly do everyone a world of a lot of good."

Up until this point in the conversation, Lucius had stayed completely quiet from behind his newspaper. Both of us knew it was best not to argue with Tom. Nonetheless, I could see Tom had pushed Lucius to the breaking point. His jaw was trembling slightly and his eyes raged wars. In a tight voice, he turned to Tom and hissed, "Don't talk to her like that."

It was only one sentence, but Tom could obviously hear the passion from Lucius' voice. Abandoning me for a moment, he turned to Lucius with mock curiousity and raised an eyebrow, "Oh really, Lucius? You think you can start ordering me around now, hm?" Tom waited for an answer. Noticing that he had gone a bit too far, Lucius immediately backed down with, "Sorry, master."

Tom studied Lucius for a moment and I could tell he was trying to read his mind. Whether or not he succeeded was something I wasn't sure about. After analyzing Lucius intently for a few moments, Tom said, "So what exactly have you been doing in the last fifteen minutes anyways? Shouldn't you be working on that paper for potions?"

Oh shit, how did Tom know about Lucius' potions paper? He had obviously read Lucius' mind. There was no other way he would've known about the paper since he and Lucius were in different potions classes. I couldn't help but wonder what else he had seen in Lucius' mind. I prayed he hadn't seen the little scene from a few moments earlier.

"I'm reading the paper," Lucius replied with a very innocent expression. Unfortunately, the feigned innocence did not fool Tom. He knew far better than that. Putting a hand on his hip, Tom scrutinized Lucius and then said, "Please, Lucius. Don't you tell me that you're reading the paper when you're holding it upsidown. I know far better. Remember that."

Lucius' cheeks turned tomato red and he started blushing furiously. Turning the paper so that it was right side up, Lucius mumbled some sort of excuse that nobody could hear. Instead of continuing his attack on Lucius, Tom turned back to me. Shit. His eyes traveled up and down my body and then his gaze shot to somewhere around my feet. Hm, that was odd. Why the hell would he be looking at my feet? Was there something wrong with my feet?

I followed his gaze, still not quite understanding what he was looking at. Unfortunately, I figured out what his gaze had landed upon moments later. Pointing his wand my by feet, Tom commanded, "Accio!" There was a swooshing sound and the robe I had been weaering that I had stuffed under the couch earlier came flying out and landed in Tom's hand.

Holding the robe in his hand, Tom cocked his head at me, "Why do you have your robe stuffed under the couch, Narcissa?" From behind the newspaper, I could see Lucius panicking. His cheeks were still quite pink and I could see his leg shaking slightly. He may pretend not to be afraid of Tom, but deep inside, it was clear that he was afraid.

Hating the way Tom was staring at me, I came up with the quickest and lamest excuse I could think of, "I was hot." Tom gave me one of those I-don't-think-so looks and rolled his eyes at me. In a very slow, mocking tone, he repeated, "You were hot." Hating the way he repeated my statement, I looked at the floor and merely nodded.

Tom continued onwards, "So you actually think that you can tell me that you were hot in here, Narcissa? I obviously don't believe you. Want to know why? First of all, it's ten degrees colder down here in the dungeons tonight because the heater broke and it's taking Filch a hell of a long time to fix it. Second of all, it's the middle of winter. Nobody gets hot in the middle of winter. And thirdly, you're shivering like crazy. You wouldn't have taken off your robe if you were cold."

You obviously couldn't lie to Tom. He always knew the truth and had a million reasons to back him up. It wasn't fair how Tom was so much smarter than the rest of us. Unfortunately, now I was stuck in a tangle of lies and I had no idea how to get out of it. All I could do was hang my head and wait for Tom to go on.

Snatching the paper from Lucius' hands, Tom pitched it into the fire. Lucius jumped at the movement and looked rather shocked even though he managed to keep quiet. Looking between the two of us, Tom said in a hard voice, "I don't know what exactly you two were doing, but I don't think I want to know. Nevertheless, did I not warn you about this, Lucius? Did you not promise to be to obey me? Does your loyalty no longer lie with your master?"

"I am sorry," Lucius said quietly, still hanging his head, "Of course my loyalty belongs with you. There is no one I would rather serve." The statement kind of hurt, but I figured that Lucius was only saying it so that we wouldn't get into any further trouble with Tom. After all, his true loyalty was with me...right? I could only hope so.

Giving us a hard look, Tom replied, "Next time I find you two together, there will be severe consequences. I don't expect anything like this to happen ever again. Lucius, come along now. I need to speak to you. Narcissa, go off and do whatever shit it is that you do when you're not trailing after Lucius every second of the day."

Without even a goodbye, Lucius was forced to get up and follow Tom off to the boys' dormitories without even a backwards glance at me. I watched his whitish-blonde hair ripple out behind him and felt an icy hand take hold of my heart. Tom was definitely trying to break us apart. The only question was: would he succeed at it?

~ ~ ~ ~

I didn't see Lucius much the next few days. I wasn't sure if he was avoiding me or what the deal was. I hoped that Tom hadn't scared him away from me. To be honest, I was being a bit paranoid about whatever "talk" they had had a couple of nights before when Tom had brought Lucius up to the dormitories with him.

Unfortunately, there was no way for me to know what Tom had talked to Lucius about. All I could do was make wild guesses. My mood dampened without Lucius around as much. Breakfast and mornings in the Great Hall seemed to go by so slowly. Lucius seemed to be skipping breakfast these days. I never saw him at the Slytherin table anymore.

I felt more vulnerable without him around as well. I mean, he had been my protector and my angel. Without him around, I couldn't escape from the glittering eyes of Walden. Walden still hadn't made another move on me, but I couldn't be sure how long he would stay submissive for. What if he got fucked up again from too much alcohol and decided to take it out on me?

Since Lucius wasn't around as often, I found myself attempting to make new friends. It was a half-hearted attempt, but hey, nobody can go through life without friends. I spent some time getting to know Nott and Severus better. Nott was quite nice once you got to know him. He had a pretty dirty sense of humor and he could always make me feel better. Severus, on the other hand, was a very true and loyal friend. He never left my side when I needed him and he always had an ear to listen to me.

Nonetheless, despite all my new friends, I just wasn't happy. In fact, I felt much more depressed than from when I had first come to Hogwarts. I was still eating as little as possible (which was a few crackers a day) and felt pretty tired and weak all the time. I missed Lucius so much. I hated having to hide my relationship with him. I wanted to scream it out to the whole world instead.

Bellatrix and I still hadn't made up. It was getting rather ridiculous by now. Bella and I had rarely fought in the past and when we did, we usually made up the next day. However, in this situation, Bella and I still hadn't made up and it was almost a month later. We saw each other in the hallways and corridors occasionally, but both of us immediately looked away and never spoke. I missed my sister as well. She had been like a friend to me. I wasn't sure how I was going to stand Christmas break with her acting like this.

Today had been a pretty shitty day for the most part. I had gotten up, gone to the Great Hall, and had had to ignore Walden's scrutinization all throughout breakfast. After that, I had failed an Arithmancy test and had gotten a hell of a lot of homework from Potions. I hadn't seen Lucius at all today. He hadn't even been in the Great Hall for dinner.

Bored out of my mind and trying to feel like I was accomplishing something in life, I was now sitting in the common room and was attempting to do my Arithmancy homework. All the numbers kept getting screwed up in my head and none of it made sense. Just as I was getting about ready to throw the damned paper into the fire, the door to the common room popped open. Shit. Just what I needed was another distraction. Was I ever going to get the goddamned homework done?