FicWad

A/N: This is much the way my first therapy session went, only I was alone. Iwish my mom had gone with me, maybe it would have been easier. It was a little awkward but after a while with that psychiatrist I changed to the psychologist I'm seeing now who I absolutely love. He's helped me a lot. Let's see if Healer Seacrest can help Ginny like my psychologist has helped me.




Warnings For This Chapter: cutting mentioned




Disclaimer: I own nothing.




Chapter Fifteen




Aspromised, Harry met Ginny outside the Hospital Wing the next morning. They walked hand-in-hand to the Great Hall, neither saying a word. Ginny didn't have much of an appetite, but ate the flapjacks Harry piled on her plate. She noticed the way Ron kept staring at her. Finally, she had had enough.




“What is it?” she snapped.




Stunned Ron opened his mouth but seemed unable to speak. He cleared his throat and tried again, “How-how are you feeling, Ginny?”




“I'm not going to break if that's what you mean, Ron. I'm not some fragile little porcelain doll who will shatter.” Ginny pushed back from the table. “Now if you excuse me, I have a free period and plenty of work to catch up on.”




She hurried out of the Great Hall. Harry glared at Ron.




“That was brilliant. Thanks, mate.” Harry stood up and went after her.




“Really, Ron!” Hermione huffed.




“Well, what was I supposed to say? After all that's happened, she's my sister, Hermione! I'm just worried about her.” Ron sighed exasperated.




Hermione's face softened at his words. “Of course you are. She'll be fine, Ron. She's getting the help she needs. Now finish your breakfast. I know you have a free period, too. You should take a leaf out of your sister's book and do some work.”




Ron nodded and filled his plate for the fourth time.




H/G




“Ginny!Ginny, wait!” Harry ran after her. She was already up two staircases. Skipping three steps at a time, Harry reached her and pulled her into his arms. “Ron didn't mean anything, love. He's just worried about you. You are his sister, after all.”




“I know.” Ginny sighed, burying her face in Harry's chest. “I just don't want everyone to start treating me like I'm going to break down crying at any moment. I'm fine. Really, I am.”




Harry shook his head in disagreement. “No, you're not fine. But you will be.”




“I'm just nervous about today is all.” Ginny pulled back from Harry.




He took her hand and led her up the staircase to Gryffindor Tower. “I know you are. But I'll be there with you. You have nothing to worry about.”




“I know you're right; I just can't help but be anxious.” Ginny stepped over the threshold into the deserted common room.




“Come on. Let's get your homework. It'll take your mind off of it.” Harry raised her hand to his lips.




Ginny nodded.“I'll be right back. Hermione told me she left it in my dormitory.”




Harry waited patiently. He pulled out his own work from the night before. Researching Everlasting Elixirs; Snape wanted three feet of parchment on the subject. Ginny returned with her arms full of books. Harry's instinct was to jump up and help her with the load, but he knew Ginny wouldn't appreciate it. He watched as she spread her work out, and smiled up at him.




“I guess the professors weren't as worried about me as you were.” Harry didn't smile at Ginny's joke. “Oh lighten up, Harry. I know they're worried about me, with the exception of Snape.” She linked her fingers through Harry's.




“I just don't think it’s funny to joke like that.” Harry scowled.




“I know. I'm sorry. Let's just get to work.” Ginny kissed his cheek and turned back to her work. Harry sighed before doing the same.




A few moments passed before Ginny turned to look at him. “I do want to get help, Harry. It's hard for me to admit it, but I want to get better.”




Harry smiled at her. “That's the first step, though. Admitting that you need help and getting it.”




Ginny nodded. “I know. It’s just so hard, and I have a feeling it's just going to get harder.”




“We'll get through it. Together. I'll be right by your side through it all.” Harry took her hand and kissed it.




“Thank you.” Ginny smiled. She leaned over and kissed him chastely.




“Anytime.” Harry grinned before turning back to his work.




H/G




Ginnywas quiet at dinner that evening. Harry didn't try to force her to talk. He knew she was anxious about her first session with Healer Seacrest. Ginny ate slowly, taking her time to chew each bite. Finally, it was half past six. She turned to Harry and sighed.




“Time to go get ready.” Ginny stood up. Harry nodded and took her hand.




“Good luck,” Hermione said softly. Ron offered her a brotherly hug as encouragement; he didn't say anything, but Ginny understood.




Harry followed her to the common room. Ginny said she would be down soon and went up to her dormitory to change. Harry decided he might as well get out of his school clothes as well, and went to his own dormitory. When he came back down five minutes later, Ginny still wasn't there. He waited ten more minutes before she came down. Apparently, Ginny wanted to look her best.




Ginny wore ablack v-neck sweater, white belted trousers, and ribboned ballet flats. Harry smiled at her.




“Feeling dressy?” he asked.




“I just wanted to look nice,” Ginny said.




“Well, you look lovely.” Harry kissed her cheek tenderly.




Ginny blushed.“Thank you.”




“Are you ready?” Harry asked. He suddenly felt out of place in his washed-out jeans and red and white shirt.




“Ready as I'll ever be,” Ginny replied, taking his hand.




Harry led the way to Professor Dumbledore's office. He gave the password(“peppermint imps”) and stepped onto the revolving staircase first. Ginny followed him hesitantly. Harry didn't let go of Ginny's hand, even as he knocked on the door to Dumbledore's office.




“Come in,” Dumbledore's voice sounded from the other side of the door.




Slowly, Harry opened the door. Dumbledore smiled at the couple as they entered the room. Ginny took a deep shuddering breath before allowing Harry to pull her into the office. A short African lady, dressed in a dark gray dress suit and quilted flat shoes, stood in the corner of Dumbledore's office. She smiled kindly at Harry and Ginny. Harry nodded at her. Ginny tried to smile back but it turned out as more of a grimace.




“Well, Iwill leave you to it.” Dumbledore swept out of the room without another word.




Harry and Ginny stood awkwardly, after Dumbledore left. Healer Seacrest smiled once more and took a seat in Dumbledore's high-backed chair.




“Please, take a seat.” Healer Seacrest waved her hand at the two chairs in front of Dumbledore's desk.




Harry and Ginny sat down. Harry still held Ginny's hand in his.




“Why don't you explain to me what's been going on to begin with? I understand, from my conversations with Professor Dumbledore and your parents, you've been hurting yourself. How?” Healer Seacrest took out aquill, dipped it in an ink pot, and waited to write on the blank piece of parchment before her.




“I cut myself,” Ginny said softly. Harry squeezed her hand reassuringly.




“Why?” Healer Seacrest pressed on.




“To deal with the pain. It makes it go away.” Ginny looked down at her lap.




“And does the pain stay away?” Healer Seacrest asked.




“No. It comes back.” Ginny shook her head.




“So you hurt yourself again,” Healer Seacrest concluded.




Ginny looked at her in surprise. “Yeah. . . . Sometimes I go to Harry. But others. . . .”




Healer Seacrest nodded and jotted something down. She dipped her quill back in the ink before continuing. “And does talking to Harry help?”




“Yes. Sometimes I'll go up to his dormitory, like if I have a nightmare or something, and I'll stay with him.” Ginny blushed slightly.




“Does he make the nightmares go away? Do you have nightmares if you sleep with him?” Healer Seacrest didn't seem to be fazed by Ginny's confession. Harry sat silently while the two talked.




“Most of the time. One time, I had a nightmare when I was with him, but he held me and I felt better. I felt safe.” Ginny met Healer Seacrest's eyes for the first time.




“How does Ginny's behavior affect you, Harry? What does it make you feel?” Healer Seacrest turned to Harry suddenly.




Harry was taken aback to being addressed so suddenly. He cleared his throat before he answered, “It hurts me . . . to see her in so much pain . . .to know she causes herself pain. I-I take care of her . . . dress her wounds . . . try to talk to her, just be there for her.”




Healer Seacrest continued to write, quill flying over parchment. “Do you ever feel helpless when she cuts herself?”




Harry was stunned. How did she know that? He had never admitted that, even to himself. Slowly he nodded. “Yeah, actually. I feel like I can't help her.”




Ginny turned to Harry in surprise. “But you do help me. I don't know what Iwould do without you.”




“How does that make you feel, Harry? What Ginny just said?” Healer Seacrest asked.




“It gives me some hope . . . that I do really help her . . . that what I do matters. But when she hurts herself . . . it makes me think that I'm not helping.” Harry sighed in resignation.




“Did you know Harry felt that way, Ginny?” Healer Seacrest turned back to Ginny.




“No. He never told me.” Ginny shook her head.




“I think that's because Harry never allowed himself to realize he felt that way,” Healer Seacrest observed. She laid her quill down and stood up. “I think that's enough for today. I'm proud of you, Ginny. You did really well.”




Healer Seacrest stood up and shook each of their hands. “I'll see you next Monday.”




Harry smiled.“Next Monday.”




Ginny nodded, but didn't speak. Harry, still holding Ginny's hand, led her out of the office. Once in the common room, Harry took Ginny up to his dormitory, not saying a word. He sat down on the bed. Ginny sat down beside him and nestled her head into his shoulder; Harry wrapped his arms around her.




“I'm so proud of you.” Harry rested his chin on top of Ginny's head.




“It was so hard,” Ginny whispered. A tear escaped her and rolled down her cheek.




“I know it was, love. I know.” Harry rocked Ginny back and forth. “Do you want to stay here tonight?”




Ginny nodded against his chest. “Please.”




Harry pulled out some of his clothes and handed them to Ginny. While she went to the bathroom to change, Harry put on his nightclothes. When she came back he lifted up the covers. Ginny snuggled up against him and was asleep almost instantly.




Harry knew what a big deal today had been. It was a major step in Ginny's recovery. He just hoped it would help her.