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Ikkaku hadn't left her bedside in hours. After Unohana had patched Michiru up the best she could, she had placed her in the 4th Company's Intensive Care unit. I could still see him sitting there, head in his hands, moving only momentarily to touch her shoulder gently. He desperately wanted her to wake up and look at him, to let him know that she was ok.
Truth be told, I did too. I wanted terribly to see her sit up and look around, as if nothing had ever happened. But I knew it would be a while. Unohana had told me that she'd lost an incredible amount of blood and that a few of her ribs were broken. Not to mention the cut on her scalp, the hole in her shoulder and the knick on her lung from Ichimaru's spear.
She was in bad shape.
Yumichika, on the other hand, was awake and demanding to see Ikkaku. Inoue had turned him over to 4th Company for a checkup after she'd finished with him, just to make sure she'd put everything back together right. He had lost just as much blood as Michiru, maybe more, but Inoue had done an incredible job of fixing him up. I wondered why I hadn't taken Michiru to her in the first place.
They were both in terrible shape, though. And I felt guilty about it.
Why, I had no clue. I had no reason to be. Except for the fact that I let her get hurt, and let Ichimaru get away... Well, those were obvious reasons to feel guilty. And now that Ichimaru had been scuffled with, the scope of the 13 companies was involved. Every department had something to do with Michiru, Ichimaru, or her bankai. The 12th Company was obviously most interested in her bankai and how it worked, 4th in the odd wounds that Ichimaru's spear had left, and the rest just pissed off in general that Ichimaru had gotten away.
Even the Captain General himself was interested in Michiru.
I stood at her door and refused several visitors so that she could rest. Everyone and their mother wanted to talk to her, ask her silly questions, but I didn't want them bothering her.
Ikkaku, on the other hand, barely noticed. He was almost catatonic next to her, only moving to go eat and shower.
He stayed that way for 3 days.
Finally, at the end of the 3rd day, I decided it was time to find out the whole story. Without knocking, I barged in, but he didn't bother to look up. It was so out of character for him. He normally had something snide or sarcastic to say to me, but he didn't even seem like he noticed me.
"Madarame. You mind telling me what the hell is wrong with you? And why you haven't even been to check on your best friend?" I asked, nudging him.
He looked up at me from the corner of his eyes. "Is it any of your concern, Abarai?" he remarked. He tried to ignore me. I pulled a chair up next to him and flopped down.
"Yeah, it is. Your best friend nearly died out there, Ikkaku. And you've shirked off everything for 3 days. Zaraki is beyond pissed off."
"I know. And I don't care. He can come get me himself if he wants he for something."
"What about Yumichika?"
"Abarai, drop it. He's ok. Michiru is--"
"Is what? Do you think she's yours, Ikkaku?" I hit my mark. He cringed, but glared at me defiantly. "I know you've been friends with her for a while, but since when has she concerned you this much? For the last few years, she's just been a plaything. Why the sudden change of heart?"
He stood up quickly, towering over me. "You don't know what you're talking about."
"I think I do," I said, meeting him eye to eye. "What changed, Madarame?"
Frustrated, he knocked me out of the way and stepped around my chair. He barged into Isane, who was bringing fresh bandages to Michiru, and down the hall toward Yumichika's room. Finally. He needed to at least check on Yumichika, instead of hovering over someone who wouldn't be awake for a few more days.
Isane asked me to leave the room as she changed Michiru's bandages, but I found myself hovering the same way Ikkaku did. I paced and paced in front of her door until Isane let me back in. The white hospital gown made her face look even more pale than it already was.
I checked over her myself, inspecting the bandages as if I knew how they were supposed to be fixed. I had no clue, really, but there was something internally that told me to check over her. Look after her. I didn't bother the one on her ribs, and I didn't want to uncover her, so I just checked her scalp, and peered at her shoulder so see if it was healing over. It had stopped bleeding, which was good.
I noticed the large spot of turquoise hair missing. Ichimaru's spear had shaved off a large hunk of her hair when it scraped her scalp, which I was sure she wouldn't be happy about. There was a small knick in her ear, but other than that, she looked the same.
And yet, somehow, I was proud of her. I had taught her a few things when she was beginning in the Academy, and I felt as if somehow I had a contribution in making her as strong as she was. I knew that it was almost egotistical, but I couldn't help myself. She was the perfect student, and I knew that after this scuffle, she was sure to take a Captain's position.
There was no doubt about it.
I was jealous, too, but not so much. I wanted to be able to take the position myself, but then again, I was happy serving under Kuchiki.
"Renji?"
I glanced over my shoulder to find Rukia peeking aronud the doorframe. "Yes?"
"Is she okay?"
A little shocked, I motioned for her to come in. She sat down beside me. "She's just knocked out. And probably will be for a long time," I told her. "She's in rough shape."
"So I heard." She shifted uneasily. "I was hoping she was. I wanted to apologize to her...for...well, for everything. But I won't bother her."
"It'll be ok."

*

The fourth day came quickly. Michiru had drifted into consciousness once, answering only to Yumichika when he mentioned her name.
He, on the other hand, had recovered quickly. He came to check on Michiru immediately after Unohana released him from her care. When he found her still out, he nearly panicked.
"How long is she going to stay like this?" he asked quietly, tugging at his new shihakushou.
"I'm not sure. Unohana said she would be awake soon," I told him. He sighed.
"I wish I had been paying attention. I could have stopped it from happening if I had just listened. But I didn't. I didn't listen to her..." he trailed off, staring down at the floor.
"Didn't listen to her about what?"
He shook his head as if he was disagreeing with me. "I didn't listen. She kept asking me why Hisagi and Iba had shown up. She thought they had something to do with what we were feeling. That weight. I didn't think so." He looked up at me. "Why were they there, Abarai? Why did they come to Karakura?"
I told him the truth. They hadn't been there for any reason other than reinforcement after the news that the Espadas were moving. "The Captain General sent them. He asked them to stake out with us while things were rolling in Las Noches." Something he said caught my attention. "...What weight, Yumichika?"
"This feeling. Like when you first meet Zaraki-taichou, and it's just this...heaviness. It's not really like spiritual pressure, though. It was something different..."
"Is that why you went toward it?"
He nodded. "Michiru noticed it first. She was worried over it."
I couldn't wrap my head around it. I hadn't felt the same thing they were describing--in fact, I hadn't noticed anything but a little movement in the atmosphere. "Where were you?"
"Some kid's house. A high schooler. He had an extra room. He lives over by that place that sold those nefarious little rice balls..."
"So in other words, a loooong way away from us. At least 6 or 7 miles, right?"
"Yes. The farmer's market that we found was only a few blocks away."
I began to add it up in my head. The distance was most likely the number one factor. The farmer's market, the store, and the house were all within a mile of Urahara Shoten. Was it directed at the shop, or at us? And if Ichimaru was looking for me, then why couldn't he just come find me?
That didn't make sense at all.
Surely, if Ichimaru really wanted to find me, he would know how to. It wasn't he was looking for a needle in a haystack, unless he was judging purely by spiritual pressure. Which was entirely possible. But if that was the case, then why had he targeted that area?
I looked down at Michiru. Had her pressure been stronger than mine? Or was it Ikkaku's?
"I wish she would wake up. I want to apologize," Yumichika said, mostly to himself.
I'd never seen him this way. He was...humble. Not worried with himself in the least.
"She'll be ok. Just giver her some time to build her system back up," I told him.
"I want to fix her hair. Is that terrible of me?"
I rolled my eyes. THAT was typical Yumichika. "No. She'll probably want it fixed, too. But that's not my forte."
"And I want to get her a present."
"Why?"
He fiddled with his robe for a moment. "Just because. I like to buy her things. Not in that way, y'know. Just...well...she defended me. I may have been totally useless but I remember her standing over me to protect me. And that means a lot."
"Whatever suits you."
"And...the whole thing with Ikkaku being such an ass... I don't know how to explain that. I would apologize but that's his place. I don't know what he's thinking. All I know is that Michiru--"
She stirred. Yumichika's face lit up instantly, and he scooted closer to her bedside. "Michiru? Are you awake?" he asked cautiously.
Her eyes fluttered for a moment and she looked up to him, but she didn't say anything. She looked to me, then back to Yumichika. He tugged on her hand gently.
"You know you want to wake up. I have your favorite candy," he begged. Her fingers closed around his hand weakly. "Those kiwi gummy things. Whatever you call them. I have bags of them."
She managed a smile. "Maybe tomorrow, Yumi," she breathed. "I'm tired."
"I'll remember that," he warned. "Tomorrow."
"Go rest," she told him, trying to sound serious. Her voice was weak. "Don't worry about me."
"I'm fine," he told her. "Are you comfortable?"
She nodded. "Just chilly..."
He looked at me expectantly, as if I should have a blanket tucked in my robe, so I got up to grab one from the cabinet. I snagged the first one I saw and unfolded it, tucking it around her gently. The blanket she already had was thick, and I wondered if she had a fever.
"She's already out again," Yumichika mused, pulling the blanket up around her shoulders. "But at least she woke up for a bit."
I stared at her for a moment as he babbled. And I really took a long look at her. Her expression was more relaxed, but I could tell she was shying away from her left side. I knew it hurt. I wanted to fix it. I wanted to help her more than anything in the world, but when it came to medicine, I was useless. It frustrated me.
There were so many things about her that I hadn't noticed, though. Like her ears being pierced, and her scar on her right temple. It was small, but I noticed it.
I noticed it and I liked it.
I found myself absorbing every little detail about her face that I could. I wanted her to open her eyes so that I could see them again, even if they were just grey, but I wanted to see them. Then again, they weren't just grey. They were siver. Such a beautiful, pure shade of silver.
Yumichika waved his hand in front of my face. "Hey. Don't get any ideas."
"Shut up." I swatted his hand away. "I'm just wondering about the stitches."
He scoffed. Standing up, he straightened his robes. "If that's what you call it... whatever. I'm going to see Ikkaku. You'd better tell me when she wakes up."

*

I decided that the best option for sleeping arrangements would be for me to sleep outside of Michiru's room. There was no night watch at the infirmary, which troubled me. So I gathered up my things and made a mini-stake out next to her door.
After checking that the windows were locked in her room, I dug out my favorite robe to sleep in. I hadn't taken it with me to Karakura for fear that I might leave it there--it was just too damn comfortable.
Thankfully, there was no one in the hallways. Michiru was the only patient in the wing of the hospital, so I took advantage of the empty rooms. I snagged blankets and pillows from the unused beds, grabbed a fresh towell, and proceeded to make my own little paradise on the floor.
Finally, with my hair down and in my favorite sleepwear, I was ready to rest. Sleep was much needed, but it took me a moment to get comfortable. I rooted around for a moment, questioning my pillow arrangement, until I smashed into the thin wall between me and Michiru's room. The room rattled and I cursed.
I peered around the door frame to check on her, making sure I hadn't disturbed her, but she seemed ok. So I went back to my arranging. I put Zabimaru in reach and settled into my spot comfortably.
Within moments, I heard shuffling. Was she up? Did I wake her up?
Confused, I peeked around again, and this time she was sitting up on the edge of the bed, looking around and lucid. She spotted me instantly.
"Renji?" she asked meekly.
My mind froze. She said my name, and the sound brought all functions to a halt. I blinked for a moment before I realized that I needed to help her.
"Don't get up, please," I told her, stumbling to her side. I nearly dropped Zabimaru on the way, indstead placing him on her nightstand. "You should lay down."
She laughed. "I've been laying down for too long, I know," she murmured. "How long?"
"Almost five days now." I sat down next to her, nervously straightening my robe. "Everyone's been wondering about you."
"Well...they shouldn't be..." She stretched her legs slowly, and I realized that the hospital gown was...rather short. I stared up at the ceiling. "Can you take me home?" she asked.
I almost laughed. "Michiru, I can't take you anywhere until Unohana gives you the okay. Until then, you need to hang out here," I told her. She sighed.
"But it's cold here," she said, but she wasn't whining. I looked down to see if I was sitting on her blanket, but yet again, my eyes were drawn to her legs. More accurately, what was on her legs. The tattoos.
I tried not to stare. I tried so hard not to look, especially since they were on her thighs, but I was curious. They looked familiar in some way.
"Where did you get those?" I asked, curiosity overcoming my social tact.
She blushed brightly and covered up with a blanket quickly. "They're nothing. Just something from Rukongai. Nothing."
"Sorry." I couldn't manage any other word.
She scratched at the bandage on her head anxiously. "Can I take this off?" she asked, and I nodded. Such a shallow wound was probably ok by now. But she cringed when she tried to reach up and I remembered the wound on her left side.
"Here. Let me get it," I said, unwrapping the bandage carefully. This put her in extremely close proximity with me.
I struggled. I really, truly struggled with the sensation it gave me. It was a mixture of warmth and pure agony. Like someone was literally standing on my chest, holding a hot ember inches from my face. That kind of warmth.
My facade fell. It crumbled like sand when she turned to look at me. "What's wrong?" she asked. I struggled to find an answer, biting my lip to keep from saying something stupid.
"I'm fine. Really."
I tossed the bandage into the trash bin, picking one last bit of gauze out of her hair. "You're warm," she commented when my hand brushed her arm. "I wish I was. It's always so cold here."
And there was the opportunity I was looking for. It was wide open. This was the perfect time to say hey, let me warm you up. Let me hold you. Let me be close to you. As much as I wanted to forget it, I knew that was what I was fishing for.
"C'mere," I said, scooting around so that my back was against the wall. Her bed was wedged into the corner and it made a perfect place for me to lean into. But she seemed worried, looking up at me from the edge of the bed as if she had done something wrong.
I picked up her other blanket and spread it out again, throwing it around her shoulders and tugging on her gently. She came closer timidly. Turning so that her right side was beneath her, she curled up against my chest, her head nestling into my collarbones. I wrapped the blanket around us tightly.
I could feel how tense she was, and it bugged me.
"See, this is a lot better, right?" I asked, struggling to make her feel comfortable. She was still scared of me. After what I'd said to her, I'd be scared, too. Guilt plagued me for what I'd said.
She nodded, settling into a comfortable spot.
"I can't have you getting cold, y'know," I told her. It was an excuse to put my arms around her. "You've got to get better. And fast. You've got big things to do."
"Like what?" she asked softly.
"I don't know. But rest."
She finally curled up, settling into the gap between me and the wall. I wasn't quite sure what it was that I felt when I looked down at her. It wasn't anything romantic in the least; it was something proud.
Holding her there, I felt strong. Like I was doing something right.
At least, I hoped I was.