Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco
It was a quaint meeting scene.
Some small tavern on the outskirts of the monster-like city of Los Angeles was the setting, full of the evening drunks. Some of the people that past him smelled of disgusting bathroom sex, some smelled of fruity drinks, but none had the smell that he was looking for. The familiar scent of cucumber melon lotion and aftershave was what his nostrils sought for and finding the search, thus far, in vain. Maybe it was time that he turned around and headed back to his fake life, his fake girlfriend, his overcompensation for the inner demons he battled with every day.
Ryan Ross was a troubled man, more than anyone else would ever know.
The hinges of the tavern door squeaked with lack of oil, the screech filling the entire room and nearly turning the talkative setting into silence - almost. At this point Ryan was two drinks in and began to wonder if his companion was going to show up at all, not that he'd blame him if he didn't. That's when a familiar presence lingered over his shoulder and sent a wave of goosebumps up his covered arms, causing his body to turn on his barstool in curiosity.
"I was going to surprise you." Brendon smiled awkwardly, gesturing toward the barstool beside Ryan's, "Is this seat taken?"
There was a lack of words, lack of air, for a moment. There were so many things that threatened to spill from behind pursed lips if he even attempted a verbal reply, so Ryan simply shook his head.
He looked good, Brendon did. More mature than the last time they'd physically hung out and a lot more shaven in the face, it didn't hurt that he was wearing something more normal either. The way Ryan had remembered him to. There was a long moment of awkward silence between their persons, causing both of their pulses to rush with anticipation and worry all at once. Both of them had their fair share of things they'd wanted to say to one another but it wasn't the time nor the place for those words, not yet. A moment later the pause was broken by Brendon clearing his throat and ordering a beer and Ryan remembered why they'd been friends for so long; Brendon had a way of hiding his self-conscious, conversationally lacking personality.
"So, what's up?" Brendon questioned as he lifted his beer to his lips, turning his body just enough to look his ex-band mate, ex-friend. "I haven't seen you in, god, a few months now?"
Ryan stared down at his empty shot glass for a moment, a breath of a laugh slipping free of his barred lips - causing them to curve into a smile. "Other than being accused of being a coke head and doing absolutely nothing with myself?"
This time Ryan turned his body toward Brendon, hands shaking softly as he lifted his glass to ask for a refill despite his attempt to cloak it. It was obvious in the other man's eyes that it was visible but he didn't care, he couldn't, the man beside him knew more about him than most people did - aside from Spencer.
"Haters are gonna hate, Ross. Have to take the good with the bad." Brendon eased his glasses up his nose and shrugged, smiling around the rim of his beer bottle. "It's good to know you aren't cracked up, though. I'd have to drive you back to the hipster brigade."
For the first time in what seemed like too long Ryan genuinely laughed, ducking his head down to hide it. "I took a cab, so you'd just have to toss me in another and send me home."
Behind his glasses, Brendon's face screwed up in a mock offended face. "I'd do no such thing, Ryan Ross. You know me better than that."
"Do I? We haven't hung out in...quite a while now, I could know nothing about new Brendon."
Brendon laughed, setting his bottle on the counter between them and spinning it in his hand while his eyes moved up to meet Ryan's. For a moment there was another racing of pulses and long pause in conversation, but this time it caused Ryan's hair to stand up on the back of his neck in the best possible way and a smirk to quirk at Brendon's lips. It seemed like the past two years hadn't happened, like nothing had changed, and they were both thankful for that.
"How about we get out of this creepy bar and just talk?" Ryan tried to meet Brendon's eyes but found himself staring at odd parts of his face when the question was asked, as if trying to avoid answering it.
Another pause.
"Yeah, sure." He nodded, hazel meeting brown with an purse of his lips and nod of his head.
**
The tavern had been smelly and awkward but not so much as Brendon's home. It had a funny smell about it, like cucumber melon and strawberry and cigarettes laced with beer and sweat. Luckily Sarah wasn't living with him or they would have both been screwed over at this point, or bickered to death - Ryan wasn't sure exactly which.
To one side of the living room was a chair they'd argued over at an Ikea while on their first headlining tour, a purple and awkwardly fuzzy recliner that had smelled like vomit and futons the first time they came into contact with it. Ryan had hated it so much that he threatened to burn it, but Brendon ended up winning the argument and had it stored under the bus until the tour was over. The chair made him laugh out loud, hushed but loud enough to earn a response from Brendon who laughed as well.
"You always hated that chair." He pointed out, pushing his glasses up his nose with a grin.
"It's an ugly chair." Ryan pointed out, index finger motioning toward the hideous excuse of furniture.
Tension in the air between them was so thick it was nearly visible, keeping conversations short and awkward, at least that's what Ryan believed it was. Brendon, however, thought it was his old friend holding back from him for some reason and he wasn't going to have it. Before Ryan could piece together another thought there was a warm hand around his wrist, tugging him toward the ridiculously hideous chair and causing him to break out into an embarrassed grin. Brendon sat down first, eyebrows furrowing behind his glasses as he uttered 'Come here' and tugged Ryan into his lap.
The younger man sat willingly but gave him an very unamused look as he did so, hands setting awkwardly in his lap. "Sooo."
"You're way too up-tight. We've cuddled, shared bunks." Brendon said, returning the unamused look which broke into a smile a moment later. "Seriously, lighten the fuck up, Ryan."
It would be a lie to say the moment was a little weird for the both of them, but the strange air around them dissipated after a few seconds. The older man leaned back and stretched out his limbs, attempting to clunk Brendon in the face with a chuckle. "Oops, sorry, was that your face?"
Brendon chuckled, pushing Ryan's arms down. "Jerk. Yes, that was my face."
"Takes a jerk to know a jerk. Jerk."
They laughed together for a moment and without hesitation Ryan's arms looped around Brendon's neck with a smile, legs crossed in a way that screamed 'yes, I'm still in the closet' to him. Their eyes met again but this time neither really looked away, time seeming to pause around them as they looked at each other. Brendon's arms snaked around Ryan's middle as they exchanged glances with each other and, as if it was a cue card for something more, they found themselves closing in the inches between their faces.
Lips pressed together for a moment, dry and soft and fitting wonderfully while their minds blanked out, shutting out any refusals of the moment. There was slight movement then, lips nudging lips apart to deepen that kiss a little further, needing to taste one another and Ryan shifted in Brendon's lap - turning to face him better, hands tangling in the younger man's hair as the kiss turned to tongues between them and soft hitches of breath. Ryan's lips were in the lead, greedy and dominative as they guided the younger man's along, tongue stroking his old friend's with a soft groan of a sound that Brendon duplicated a moment later. Brendon's fingertips itched to sneak beneath Ryan's shirt but refrained, gripping his hips and stroking circles against them with his thumbs instead as the older man straddled his thighs.
And as soon as it had happened they were scrambling apart, staring blankly at one another. Both of their faces were curious about what was going to happen next, both mouthes opened softly to allow air, both loving and hating what had just happened.
"Time to get up."
Brendon blinked across at him, eyebrows furrowing in confusion at the uttered words as Ryan climbed off his lap and stood to his feet. "So that's i-"
Before he could finish the sentence lips pressed back to his. This kiss was different from the last, it wasn't just a rush of emotions but something that promised too many things at once - something meaningful.
"No, upstairs. I'm staying the night."
Some small tavern on the outskirts of the monster-like city of Los Angeles was the setting, full of the evening drunks. Some of the people that past him smelled of disgusting bathroom sex, some smelled of fruity drinks, but none had the smell that he was looking for. The familiar scent of cucumber melon lotion and aftershave was what his nostrils sought for and finding the search, thus far, in vain. Maybe it was time that he turned around and headed back to his fake life, his fake girlfriend, his overcompensation for the inner demons he battled with every day.
Ryan Ross was a troubled man, more than anyone else would ever know.
The hinges of the tavern door squeaked with lack of oil, the screech filling the entire room and nearly turning the talkative setting into silence - almost. At this point Ryan was two drinks in and began to wonder if his companion was going to show up at all, not that he'd blame him if he didn't. That's when a familiar presence lingered over his shoulder and sent a wave of goosebumps up his covered arms, causing his body to turn on his barstool in curiosity.
"I was going to surprise you." Brendon smiled awkwardly, gesturing toward the barstool beside Ryan's, "Is this seat taken?"
There was a lack of words, lack of air, for a moment. There were so many things that threatened to spill from behind pursed lips if he even attempted a verbal reply, so Ryan simply shook his head.
He looked good, Brendon did. More mature than the last time they'd physically hung out and a lot more shaven in the face, it didn't hurt that he was wearing something more normal either. The way Ryan had remembered him to. There was a long moment of awkward silence between their persons, causing both of their pulses to rush with anticipation and worry all at once. Both of them had their fair share of things they'd wanted to say to one another but it wasn't the time nor the place for those words, not yet. A moment later the pause was broken by Brendon clearing his throat and ordering a beer and Ryan remembered why they'd been friends for so long; Brendon had a way of hiding his self-conscious, conversationally lacking personality.
"So, what's up?" Brendon questioned as he lifted his beer to his lips, turning his body just enough to look his ex-band mate, ex-friend. "I haven't seen you in, god, a few months now?"
Ryan stared down at his empty shot glass for a moment, a breath of a laugh slipping free of his barred lips - causing them to curve into a smile. "Other than being accused of being a coke head and doing absolutely nothing with myself?"
This time Ryan turned his body toward Brendon, hands shaking softly as he lifted his glass to ask for a refill despite his attempt to cloak it. It was obvious in the other man's eyes that it was visible but he didn't care, he couldn't, the man beside him knew more about him than most people did - aside from Spencer.
"Haters are gonna hate, Ross. Have to take the good with the bad." Brendon eased his glasses up his nose and shrugged, smiling around the rim of his beer bottle. "It's good to know you aren't cracked up, though. I'd have to drive you back to the hipster brigade."
For the first time in what seemed like too long Ryan genuinely laughed, ducking his head down to hide it. "I took a cab, so you'd just have to toss me in another and send me home."
Behind his glasses, Brendon's face screwed up in a mock offended face. "I'd do no such thing, Ryan Ross. You know me better than that."
"Do I? We haven't hung out in...quite a while now, I could know nothing about new Brendon."
Brendon laughed, setting his bottle on the counter between them and spinning it in his hand while his eyes moved up to meet Ryan's. For a moment there was another racing of pulses and long pause in conversation, but this time it caused Ryan's hair to stand up on the back of his neck in the best possible way and a smirk to quirk at Brendon's lips. It seemed like the past two years hadn't happened, like nothing had changed, and they were both thankful for that.
"How about we get out of this creepy bar and just talk?" Ryan tried to meet Brendon's eyes but found himself staring at odd parts of his face when the question was asked, as if trying to avoid answering it.
Another pause.
"Yeah, sure." He nodded, hazel meeting brown with an purse of his lips and nod of his head.
**
The tavern had been smelly and awkward but not so much as Brendon's home. It had a funny smell about it, like cucumber melon and strawberry and cigarettes laced with beer and sweat. Luckily Sarah wasn't living with him or they would have both been screwed over at this point, or bickered to death - Ryan wasn't sure exactly which.
To one side of the living room was a chair they'd argued over at an Ikea while on their first headlining tour, a purple and awkwardly fuzzy recliner that had smelled like vomit and futons the first time they came into contact with it. Ryan had hated it so much that he threatened to burn it, but Brendon ended up winning the argument and had it stored under the bus until the tour was over. The chair made him laugh out loud, hushed but loud enough to earn a response from Brendon who laughed as well.
"You always hated that chair." He pointed out, pushing his glasses up his nose with a grin.
"It's an ugly chair." Ryan pointed out, index finger motioning toward the hideous excuse of furniture.
Tension in the air between them was so thick it was nearly visible, keeping conversations short and awkward, at least that's what Ryan believed it was. Brendon, however, thought it was his old friend holding back from him for some reason and he wasn't going to have it. Before Ryan could piece together another thought there was a warm hand around his wrist, tugging him toward the ridiculously hideous chair and causing him to break out into an embarrassed grin. Brendon sat down first, eyebrows furrowing behind his glasses as he uttered 'Come here' and tugged Ryan into his lap.
The younger man sat willingly but gave him an very unamused look as he did so, hands setting awkwardly in his lap. "Sooo."
"You're way too up-tight. We've cuddled, shared bunks." Brendon said, returning the unamused look which broke into a smile a moment later. "Seriously, lighten the fuck up, Ryan."
It would be a lie to say the moment was a little weird for the both of them, but the strange air around them dissipated after a few seconds. The older man leaned back and stretched out his limbs, attempting to clunk Brendon in the face with a chuckle. "Oops, sorry, was that your face?"
Brendon chuckled, pushing Ryan's arms down. "Jerk. Yes, that was my face."
"Takes a jerk to know a jerk. Jerk."
They laughed together for a moment and without hesitation Ryan's arms looped around Brendon's neck with a smile, legs crossed in a way that screamed 'yes, I'm still in the closet' to him. Their eyes met again but this time neither really looked away, time seeming to pause around them as they looked at each other. Brendon's arms snaked around Ryan's middle as they exchanged glances with each other and, as if it was a cue card for something more, they found themselves closing in the inches between their faces.
Lips pressed together for a moment, dry and soft and fitting wonderfully while their minds blanked out, shutting out any refusals of the moment. There was slight movement then, lips nudging lips apart to deepen that kiss a little further, needing to taste one another and Ryan shifted in Brendon's lap - turning to face him better, hands tangling in the younger man's hair as the kiss turned to tongues between them and soft hitches of breath. Ryan's lips were in the lead, greedy and dominative as they guided the younger man's along, tongue stroking his old friend's with a soft groan of a sound that Brendon duplicated a moment later. Brendon's fingertips itched to sneak beneath Ryan's shirt but refrained, gripping his hips and stroking circles against them with his thumbs instead as the older man straddled his thighs.
And as soon as it had happened they were scrambling apart, staring blankly at one another. Both of their faces were curious about what was going to happen next, both mouthes opened softly to allow air, both loving and hating what had just happened.
"Time to get up."
Brendon blinked across at him, eyebrows furrowing in confusion at the uttered words as Ryan climbed off his lap and stood to his feet. "So that's i-"
Before he could finish the sentence lips pressed back to his. This kiss was different from the last, it wasn't just a rush of emotions but something that promised too many things at once - something meaningful.
"No, upstairs. I'm staying the night."
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