Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Boys Are Like Chocolate
Dear Diary,
Oh goodness I don’t know where to start! I guess the beginning…
Well it’s been nearly a week since I saw Bert in the park and I’d done pretty much nothing over than mope for that time. But yesterday I decided to go and see Gerard to tell him what had happened with Bert and that he was right… About some of it at least.
But when I got there it looked like he was having problems himself. He was sitting his room alone and just sort of sulking on his bed. I sat down opposite him but he didn’t seem to notice let alone care. I coughed awkwardly and then he finally turned to look at me.
The first thing I noticed was that he didn’t smile and Gerard is a pretty happy person “Hey,” He greeted “I haven’t seen you all week. Have you been avoiding me?”
“I’ve been avoiding the world…” I confessed “For an entire week. I was coming over to tell you what happened. But you seem even more upset than me.”
He shrugged “I don’t want to talk about it Frank, not yet. It’s too soon.”
We sat in silence for a few seconds before he asked “So, what did happen?”
I told him all about Bert and the park. He finally smiled “You called her ugly?”
“I was angry!” I laughed in defence.
He smiled again “I bet she was ugly anyway. Nobody’s hotter than you.”
I just sat there for a moment “What did you just say?”
Gerard blushed bright red before muttering “Fuck, I knew I should’ve just told you to leave me alone…”
“Meaning?” I asked him, getting a little embarrassed.
He went even redder before reaching under his bed. He pulled something out and handed it to me. It was a blue book with the words ‘Sketch Pad’ on the front. I looked up at me and he nodded, telling me it was okay to open it “But before you do,” He said quickly “Don’t hate me Frank… I… I don’t…” He didn’t finish his sentence, he just nodded again. So I opened it. And gasped.
The first picture was of me. And Gerard. And we were kissing. And we were both shirtless. I began flicking through the book. All the pictures were of me… And him. Together.
We were both silent until I found the courage to ask “Gerard… You… Like me like that?”
He stood up from his bed and walked over to his window “I didn’t want to say anything Frank. I don’t want to sound homophobic or anything… But, I wanted to be normal! I shouldn’t be ashamed of something like this Frank, but I am. There are so many things that set me apart already and I didn’t want another one!”
I stood up and walked to stand next to him “I understand Gerard and you know I do. We are really similar. We both dress the same, like the same music so of course society already hates us. And then I’m gay to top it all off. But you have a girlfriend?”
“I only went out with her to get my mind off you!” He confessed “I broke up with her yesterday. It’s why I was sulking in my bedroom. I couldn’t stop thinking about you even when I was going out with Tammy. I had no one to tell because I was so ashamed!”
“You were ashamed of being in love with me?” I tried to take it as nothing personal but it was a little hard.
He sighed so I guessed he didn’t know what to say “I don’t know what to say!” He told me angrily “It’s not that it’s you! It’s that… You’re a boy! And I’m a boy!” He broke into tears “I’m not supposed to feel this way!”
“Gerard,” I comforted him “Trust me, you’re not the only gay guy in the world! Lots of guys must feel like this! But most of them just suffer in silence for the rest of their lives. You had the courage to tell me at least.”
He shrugged “But now what? All I’ve done is admit the most humiliating thing in my life to you and now-“
I don’t know why I thought it’d be a good idea. But I just did it. My lips crashed down onto Gerard’s and he didn’t push me away. We were just kissing. And it felt so wrong. I forgot about the rest of the world and… I don’t know, it’s really hard to describe.
But after a while, we heard a door close downstairs and Gerard quickly pulled away “That’ll be Mikey…”
I was confused “So? Me and Mikey have gone out before so how could Mikey be homophobic?”
“It’s not that,” He told me “I just don’t want people to know that I’m gay yet. It’s too much for me.”
I shook my head at him “Gerard, it’s nothing to be ashamed of-“
“Frank!” He cried “I know it’s nothing to be ashamed of! But I just am okay, how much more plain can I make it?”
I just looked at the floor while he rested his hands on my shoulders “Just give me some time, okay? And then… And then maybe we could be together?”
I looked up into his eyes “You promise?”
He nodded “But you have to promise you’ll wait for me.”
Smiling, I nodded “I will wait for you.”
And then I left because Mikey started getting all suspicious and I know how humiliated Gerard felt. But hey, I promised I’d wait for him. And he’s going to wait for me.
So things are looking up.
~ Frank
xoxo
Oh goodness I don’t know where to start! I guess the beginning…
Well it’s been nearly a week since I saw Bert in the park and I’d done pretty much nothing over than mope for that time. But yesterday I decided to go and see Gerard to tell him what had happened with Bert and that he was right… About some of it at least.
But when I got there it looked like he was having problems himself. He was sitting his room alone and just sort of sulking on his bed. I sat down opposite him but he didn’t seem to notice let alone care. I coughed awkwardly and then he finally turned to look at me.
The first thing I noticed was that he didn’t smile and Gerard is a pretty happy person “Hey,” He greeted “I haven’t seen you all week. Have you been avoiding me?”
“I’ve been avoiding the world…” I confessed “For an entire week. I was coming over to tell you what happened. But you seem even more upset than me.”
He shrugged “I don’t want to talk about it Frank, not yet. It’s too soon.”
We sat in silence for a few seconds before he asked “So, what did happen?”
I told him all about Bert and the park. He finally smiled “You called her ugly?”
“I was angry!” I laughed in defence.
He smiled again “I bet she was ugly anyway. Nobody’s hotter than you.”
I just sat there for a moment “What did you just say?”
Gerard blushed bright red before muttering “Fuck, I knew I should’ve just told you to leave me alone…”
“Meaning?” I asked him, getting a little embarrassed.
He went even redder before reaching under his bed. He pulled something out and handed it to me. It was a blue book with the words ‘Sketch Pad’ on the front. I looked up at me and he nodded, telling me it was okay to open it “But before you do,” He said quickly “Don’t hate me Frank… I… I don’t…” He didn’t finish his sentence, he just nodded again. So I opened it. And gasped.
The first picture was of me. And Gerard. And we were kissing. And we were both shirtless. I began flicking through the book. All the pictures were of me… And him. Together.
We were both silent until I found the courage to ask “Gerard… You… Like me like that?”
He stood up from his bed and walked over to his window “I didn’t want to say anything Frank. I don’t want to sound homophobic or anything… But, I wanted to be normal! I shouldn’t be ashamed of something like this Frank, but I am. There are so many things that set me apart already and I didn’t want another one!”
I stood up and walked to stand next to him “I understand Gerard and you know I do. We are really similar. We both dress the same, like the same music so of course society already hates us. And then I’m gay to top it all off. But you have a girlfriend?”
“I only went out with her to get my mind off you!” He confessed “I broke up with her yesterday. It’s why I was sulking in my bedroom. I couldn’t stop thinking about you even when I was going out with Tammy. I had no one to tell because I was so ashamed!”
“You were ashamed of being in love with me?” I tried to take it as nothing personal but it was a little hard.
He sighed so I guessed he didn’t know what to say “I don’t know what to say!” He told me angrily “It’s not that it’s you! It’s that… You’re a boy! And I’m a boy!” He broke into tears “I’m not supposed to feel this way!”
“Gerard,” I comforted him “Trust me, you’re not the only gay guy in the world! Lots of guys must feel like this! But most of them just suffer in silence for the rest of their lives. You had the courage to tell me at least.”
He shrugged “But now what? All I’ve done is admit the most humiliating thing in my life to you and now-“
I don’t know why I thought it’d be a good idea. But I just did it. My lips crashed down onto Gerard’s and he didn’t push me away. We were just kissing. And it felt so wrong. I forgot about the rest of the world and… I don’t know, it’s really hard to describe.
But after a while, we heard a door close downstairs and Gerard quickly pulled away “That’ll be Mikey…”
I was confused “So? Me and Mikey have gone out before so how could Mikey be homophobic?”
“It’s not that,” He told me “I just don’t want people to know that I’m gay yet. It’s too much for me.”
I shook my head at him “Gerard, it’s nothing to be ashamed of-“
“Frank!” He cried “I know it’s nothing to be ashamed of! But I just am okay, how much more plain can I make it?”
I just looked at the floor while he rested his hands on my shoulders “Just give me some time, okay? And then… And then maybe we could be together?”
I looked up into his eyes “You promise?”
He nodded “But you have to promise you’ll wait for me.”
Smiling, I nodded “I will wait for you.”
And then I left because Mikey started getting all suspicious and I know how humiliated Gerard felt. But hey, I promised I’d wait for him. And he’s going to wait for me.
So things are looking up.
~ Frank
xoxo
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